(Real article) The Body Count at Home
This young, innocent, pure, white, blonde, attractive lady died from a treatable condition because she had no health insurance. And no! She wasn't poor-- she had a college education and a career. Her condition eventually prevented her from working. And sadly there was no strong, white, Christian male with a heart of gold to give this fair lady a kiss and wake her from slumber.
In fact this girl is not alone. Young, pure, attractive blonde ladies are dying all across the country due to lack of health insurance. (And remember, I'm talking about ones who aren't poor, and therefore can't just solve all of their own problems by working harder and getting more jobs). In fact, many of these beautiful blonde ladies are probably even virgins when they die. This a tragedy we cannot allow to happen. We must spare no expense in saving the lives of these lily-white, platinum blonde, gorgeous, virginal damsels in distress. We must run news stories about them 24/7, interviewing their families while the screen displays slide-shows of their beautiful photographs.
And if we do this, I guarantee that at least three quarters of conservatives in America will almost immediately begin to support health care reform, no matter what the cost.