Random Win: The irl Fuck Ya thread

[Melena]

Can you dispute ratings? Cause that's ridiculous.

Nope, Uber support is trash tier at best. I frequent the Uber Driver reddit and a driver got a 1 star when this lady loaded 2 kids in his car, so he started the trip, and only then realized mommy wanted a stranger in an uber to drive her two kids both under 8 alone to grandma's house and he told her it was against the ToS. Ended the ride, contacted uber that it was a fradulent ride and she 1 starred him and hit him with every negative thing she could. He even had dash cam footage and they wouldn't budge.

I'm not worried though about it. It lowered me from a 4.89 to a 4.87, doesn't affect me in the grand scheme of things. And I slammed him with a 1 star rating so I won't see him again. His rating was already pretty low, which is probably why he chose select instead of X or Pool. If I see a customer below a 4.7 and they are more then 5 minutes away, if it's not a surge price or select, I won't take them as there is usually a pretty good reason why their ratings start creeping that low.

[Ksandra]

Got to chaperone Grad Night at Disneyland last night. Didn't get home until 4:30, but it was tons of fun and lines were way shorter than normal. Toy Story was only 30 minutes!

[Krandor]

Found out a few months back I was an affected party in a class action lawsuit against the State of Washington, and just got in the settlement check for $1840. Ah yeah

[tyven]

Found out a few months back I was an affected party in a class action lawsuit against the State of Washington, and just got in the settlement check for $1840. Ah yeah

i hope that goes a long way towards healing the molestation

[Krandor]

At the very least it's going to those Overkill EQTs.

[tyven]

gdi krando idk what that is. is that a computer part., do i need it?

[Krandor]

I'm so disappointed in you.

[tyven]

o the only EQTs i fuck with are the king push but even those i don't love. Something about the EQT silhoutte i don't fuck with. Maybe too slopey for me? idk

[Yuri-G]

yuri-g's talking about men, BRING OUT THE TROLLS!

long story short: the guy I've been seeing has been downgraded to FWB. he still thinks we're dating; I'm like "dude... once every week or two, after three months? that's not dating. that's FWB." but let him believe what he wants, as long as it's working for both of us.

now, obviously I have conflicting feelings about this but I've decided to roll with it because a) the sex/cuddling/conversation is nice, but b) more importantly, I feel that I need to learn how to turn down my emotional dial a bit. I need to be able to experience this ridiculous range of feels and still act like, you know, a sane person. to be able to spend time with him and then go back to my own life is HUGE for me and this is good practice.

to that end: ran into him today. I've been really depressed all day so I was already in a shitty spot. he was on the bus with what I assume is a date. I wasn't sure what to do but he beckoned me over so I sat near them. inside I immediately went zero to sixty, but outside I just made pleasant conversation, talked to his date a bit, talked to him, super chill. felt a twang of hurt when he got off the bus but I just let it slide because that shit is based in insecurity.

I mean me, the queen of the pity party and a stage IV clinger, casually running into someone I have feels for on a date and walking away with a smile because I know I can do better anyway. I can't tell you how proud I am of that.

[Brill Weave]

You need counseling dude. In the worst fucking way possible. You're hurt that the guy you've classified as FWB is out with someone else? You have no fucking idea what you want. These situations are entirely of your own making.

[tyven]

You need counseling dude. In the worst fucking way possible.

what I think to myself after I see someone has read one of Yuri's posts.

[Yuri-G]

You need counseling dude. In the worst fucking way possible. You're hurt that the guy you've classified as FWB is out with someone else? You have no fucking idea what you want. These situations are entirely of your own making.

I've been going to counseling for ages and will continue to go.

I will always be hurt by things like this. I don't control that. That's part of my disorder. But what I'm learning is how to act separately from that hurt, to not allow it to control me.

My whole life I've been told I need to stop feeling the way I do, and it's only now that I'm beginning to realize - it doesn't work that way. What can happen, however, is for me to change how I act, and as I do so my feelings eventually begin to follow. And how I acted last night was exactly in line with what I should have done, with what I want out of this situation. Counseling: successful. That's why it was a win for me.

And yeah, I realize that's confusing. What I want here is not what I feel. I can't really explain it better than that though. Feelings don't need to drive what we aim for in life.

[dasva]

care less

[Yuri-G]

care less

Oh shit, is that the solution? Why didn't I think of that earlier??? Yeah let me just go ahead and flip that switch!


I acted as I would with any FWB, regardless of how I feel. I acted as though I care a lot less than I do, and my feelings will eventually follow. I don't for the life of me understand why people can't grasp that concept, but luckily enough, they don't need to. Only I do.


Seriously, as someone who has hinted himself at dealing with mental issues, are you really so dense as to tell a person with massive anxiety to just "care less"? Do you tell a person with horrible depression to just "stop being sad?" You should know better.

[Roranora]

You might have a few bushels of anxiety disorders and mental ills. Of course most replies here won't help you, but it doesn't truly seem like you post looking for sincere input; rather you're most keen to nitpick the oversimplification in the inevitable reductionist replies.

[Yuri-G]

You might have a few bushels of anxiety disorders and mental ills. Of course most replies here won't help you, but it doesn't truly seem like you post looking for sincere input; rather you're most keen to nitpick the oversimplification in the inevitable reductionist replies.

Hmm, not my intention but you're correct, that's exactly what I'm doing. Feedback accepted. Thank you.

[vagus]

care less

Save yourself the therapy. This is the advice for you.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[dasva]

Oh shit, is that the solution? Why didn't I think of that earlier??? Yeah let me just go ahead and flip that switch!


I acted as I would with any FWB, regardless of how I feel. I acted as though I care a lot less than I do, and my feelings will eventually follow. I don't for the life of me understand why people can't grasp that concept, but luckily enough, they don't need to. Only I do.


Seriously, as someone who has hinted himself at dealing with mental issues, are you really so dense as to tell a person with massive anxiety to just "care less"? Do you tell a person with horrible depression to just "stop being sad?" You should know better.

Pretty sure I'm outright stated a few. But yes I am going to suggest that you assume at least some small measure of agency and try to actually overcome your problems because at the end of the day it is up to you. All the counseling in the world wont fix anyone. Now sure it can help them realize such or how to do it or better identify the problems but at the end of the day it's up to you. And yes shit is hard and there are set backs and it's something that takes literally a lifetime of work and yeah a lot of it will be going thru the motions until they sink in. But you don't have to nor should you have to accept you will always be like you are now. Also on a side note someone did at some point pretty tell me to stop being sad because they couldn't handle it and there own sad. Oddly it sort of worked... ish


Now for a win. Called Comcast about to tell them to change me to lower internet only... only to have them tell me that I can keep exactly my current service for even less and that I should call each time the promotion offer expires to get a new one. Cut my bill in half without changing anything lol. Also seems that the modem I have thru them is too old and that's why my internet acts funny sometimes so shipping me a new one yays

[Yuri-G]

Pretty sure I'm outright stated a few. But yes I am going to suggest that you assume at least some small measure of agency and try to actually overcome your problems because at the end of the day it is up to you. All the counseling in the world wont fix anyone. Now sure it can help them realize such or how to do it or better identify the problems but at the end of the day it's up to you. And yes shit is hard and there are set backs and it's something that takes literally a lifetime of work and yeah a lot of it will be going thru the motions until they sink in. But you don't have to nor should you have to accept you will always be like you are now. Also on a side note someone did at some point pretty tell me to stop being sad because they couldn't handle it and there own sad. Oddly it sort of worked... ish

Not trying to be a dick, but what part of me treating the FWB like a FWB and overcoming all the broken feels I posses did you miss?


Believe me, I've got agency. Just because my feels are fucked doesn't mean I have to be. That's the point, and that's the win. Anyway, the feels catch up with the actions over time - I'm caring less and less, whether that comes across on here or not.

[Kalmado]

I've been going to counseling for ages and will continue to go.

I will always be hurt by things like this. I don't control that. That's part of my disorder. But what I'm learning is how to act separately from that hurt, to not allow it to control me.

My whole life I've been told I need to stop feeling the way I do, and it's only now that I'm beginning to realize - it doesn't work that way. What can happen, however, is for me to change how I act, and as I do so my feelings eventually begin to follow. And how I acted last night was exactly in line with what I should have done, with what I want out of this situation. Counseling: successful. That's why it was a win for me.

And yeah, I realize that's confusing. What I want here is not what I feel. I can't really explain it better than that though. Feelings don't need to drive what we aim for in life.

First things first, I've been clinically diagnosed with high anxiety, PTSD, and mild depression. I also have what some would call "abandonment issues". The reason I'm saying this first is to let you know to at least some degree, I "get it", where you're coming from that is. I'm writing this with the hopes you will read it with an open mind and think about some possibilities on how to work towards a brighter mental future. With that out of the way let's get to what matters.

Both bolded statements go hand in hand. In my opinion, a huge issue you're having is with the first bold statement. You've already determined you'll always be hurt by something. This is major because you do not need to continue with that mindset. Yes I understand it's very hard to change it and it will take a ton of hard work and a lot of time, but you can do it. When I would have some similar thoughts I used to right down why I felt that way and examine it. Like, really think hard about why my brain is saying such a thing. And then I'd formulate a plan to try and change that. For instance, I had major acne from 23-27. My girlfriend of five years broke up with me at 27 and I felt I was so unattractive that I'd never date again. I had to teach myself how to look beyond the outer appearance for the time being and focus on what I could control and work on fixing the acne issue (Accutane is a life saver even with a few weird side effects). I'd right down what I felt were my winning qualities and answer honestly what my poor qualities were so I could work to become a better person. And not a better person for others but for myself. Always remember, YOU are #1 and you must always take care of yourself first and foremost.

I'd like to suggest a few books to read if you're up for it. These books greatly helped me become a better person and really helped me change from a borderline hermit that hated the world to a sociable person who tries new things whenever I can and for the most part I have a positive outlook on life.

The second bold statement tells me you are somewhat aware of your emotions, thoughts, and how it affects yourself. Keep working at it and you will see results. Remind yourself that this is a daily task that can be worked on and just because one day isn't the greatest doesn't mean the next won't be possibly your happiest day ever.

Prices are for used. If you're a Kindle person, I believe some of these titles can be had cheaper. And if anyone else that's reading this has any suggestions for good literature, please post!

The Secret - $5.22

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff...and it's All Small Stuff - $4.99 *Also, many other spin offs of this series*

How to Make Friends and Influence People - $7-$8