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  1. #41
    Limecat
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    Okay. Imma do a social experiment since this got derailed. Hopefully we can get back on track and I can keep gritting helpful advice that I can use to help my recovery.


    Gotta say, it’s kind of funny watching someone take pot shots at someone who, openly admitted how bad his brain in and how I’m getting worse


    Okay, so my question to anyone reading this. How do you read my postes? Do I come off as hateful and attacking, someone lying for attention, or an asshole that refuses to listen(afraid I will require proof it’s the last one). I’m honestly curious because I want to get this back on track but that can’t happen people feel I’m attacking or they’re attacking me. Once I have an understanding, I’ll make, probably another post or two since it’s clearly run it’s course. And let’s just end this part on what people think of all.


    Now, here’s something I know I shouldn’t say but....no, I’ll wait.

  2. #42

    Sweaty Dick Punching Enthusiast

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    what you sound like is terrified and pissed off, because what's happening to you is terrifying and would piss anyone off.

  3. #43
    D. Ring
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    What you are going through is something very serious. You are experiencing the patient psychology at the highest level.

    Unfortunately, Emotional Intelligence in workplace is a rare asset, lots of smart people (whether it is a CEO or a Very experienced doctor) May not always choose the best way to approach a patient.

    It is a muscle I would suggest everyone to work on.

  4. #44
    Limecat
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    I would have liked some more ideas but the ones I got were insanely valuable and will be put to use.


    I will end it with this. The reason why I got snippy there is because I was repeatedly told I was wrong about my personal experiences and wrong about a system people knew nothing about. And just for records sake. I never once said I “distrusted” my Doctors. And with that. Yeah I’m done with this thread. Like everything on mine, it always gets derailed into me VS BG

  5. #45
    BG Medical's Student of Medicine
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    I'm starting to see where your issues are stemming from.

    For what it's worth I don't think you are drug seeking. You do seem to have some pretty serious psychological issues I think you would be wise to address.

  6. #46
    The Shitlord
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    Quote Originally Posted by Myrrh_Quetz View Post
    Actually, if Banethebrawler reads this. My wife is off food and does home TPN 5 days a week now. Ontop of that, she has several IV antibiotics that are also done every night. Basically, we are both shockingly levels of fucked up and are just going 1 day at a time.
    sorry, been busy.

    That's fuckin rough. given the issues you've had with your care, it does make me wonder about hers. that's some serious shit and i feel like maybe managing that level of illness from home with a seriously ill cancer patient as the primary caregiver is a shit care plan. what kind of in-home nurse assistance can you get? that's usually a relatively inexpensive option insurers feel better about when they start balking at infusion clinic costs.

    in regards to the tyche stuff, and your reaction to it... he made some really solid points about relationship with your care team and you rattled off a list of things why that totally isn't the problem... when you've been very clear about the fact that your relationship with your care team is awful. normally i'd say any patient as experienced as you are should know how critically important mutual respect and a functioning professional relationship is, but i think, as tyche mentioned, your experience has been so exceptionally bad that it's not even registering for you that this shit isn't normal.

    we're telling you this shit isn't normal. you're insisting it is. canadian healthcare is different, but there are still basic standards of care (on a humanitarian level) that are simply not being met, according to the descriptions you're giving us. so either you're wrong, you're lying, you're in denial, or you need to get the fuck out of Canada.

  7. #47
    BG Medical's Student of Medicine
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    Well said, Bane.

  8. #48
    Limecat
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    Okay, gonna try to phrase this that it doesn’t get read wrong or like I’m attacking anyone.

    I never said this stuff was normal. I said it’s the crap I deal with. If you get an asshole doctor, you’re stuck with it. The point of my stories was to try to get others to understand certain things. I mentioned a story and got told I was wrong because Doctors in the states have to be nice for the reason he stated. He admitted to knowing zero at how Canadian health care works. I have filled complaint after complaint on any and all doctors who treat me poorly. I started to record them as proof so things would stop being a “he said/She said”. I wasn’t try to say this is normal or anything like that. I did mention the challenges of attempting to sue or going to the press, because what I said there was true.

    I just wanted to see if other people who’ve dealt with cancer had any personal tips to get back to an acceptable % so I could go back to work. There was some great advice from people on that subject which I will be putting to use.

    And you’re probably right, I should move, provinces at the bare minimum, Countries at the Max. Sadly it’s just not that easy. First, my wife’s family live here. They’ve been great support.

    Second, moving costs money. I haven’t worked in over a year and I never qualified for sick leave, Employment insurance, or disability. My wife, she hasn’t worked in two and a half years. Her disability barely covers mortgage and other payments.

    Third. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again. No insurance company would ever touch my wife and I. So how would one go about affording medical care in the states?

    Fourth. I have never stated that I will not see the proper therapist for my issues. That is still a current plan.

    5th. Why would I lie?? Lying here gets me nothing. If I’m looking for advice, lying would make getting said advice harder. Lying to medical staff gets me nowhere, so again, why would I lie? It’s 1000000% useless or otherwise.

    And Finally, I do not speak to any medical staff with attitude. I have never and will never. I try to be as nice and understanding as possible. What I say in these threads is my anger, annoyance, and frustrations about what I deal with in hospital. Getting angry at medical stuff would only ever put me backwards in my health.


    Anyways. This thread is done. I was wishing to see if others had any other advice but at this point, it’s just turned into me acting like my dumb self, and just getting my whole thread derailed into people thinking I’m some sort of jackass.


    So I will end it with this. Thank you to those who helped me out and I apologize to the others. Have a nice night

  9. #49
    The Optimistic Asshole
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    When I said "I don't know how that works" it was specific to charting liability, and not a direct reflection of how much I know about healthcare. Which I went back and looked, and did in fact find a sort of ICD diagnosis code for drug seeking behavior. I don't know if that means much to you, but it's not a primary diagnosis, but a symptom of a diagnosis. I hate coding. I'm bad at it. But essentially it would code under a person feigning illness and symptoms would include drug seeking behavior. It wouldn't be a gigantic banner on a chart. Not even really in the history. We can make notes about it and those notes are typically a pain in the ass to subpeona if a court wanted them for a lawsuit. I'm getting off topic now. But like I said, I don't know how that works in Canada. I also didn't know you were from Canada at that time. If you want me to get deep in the weeds on how we can tell if a patient is seeking drugs, most patients, unless emergent, sign consents for narcotics. In Kentucky (other estates have other systems), we have a database of electronic reporting for controlled substances (KASPER), so I can go and look up how many narcotic scripts the patient has filled and what they've taken. So I don't need a banner to know if my patient has attempted to fill 3 narcotic scripts from 3 doctors last month. I can pull that up.

    But here's what I do know about. And many others that have given you very solid advice know about. That's health and well-being. Best practice extends beyond borders. How we treat PTSD, MI, heart failure, encephalitis, stroke, whatever, that doesn't change when we cross over into Canada. You had a lung transplant. I feel pretty damn confident I can say that you take Prograf (tacrolimus) or Celcept (mycophenolate). Those are standard of care immunosuppressants that are quite cheap. We do that here in the states. They do it in Europe. They do it in Canada, Mexico, Japan, whatever. So when Kuro or I or others have given you advice, we don't need to know about Canada. We look at the information you provided and look at what standard of care is, what best practice is, what evidence suggests, and we tell you what we think would help. Healthcare may change, but health, disease, and treatment doesn't. The advice we've given has been based on the information you have provided. But we can't diagnose you. That's why our advice is ultimately "what you say sounds like this, it is treatable, ask for a referral to X and Y specialities, they can help you". Now, along with that advice, you've made a lot of complaints or excuses based on your experiences (such as psych doctors seeing you in hospital and pain clinic drug testing you) and I have tried to explain why the care dictates providers make some of the decisions they have made in your cases. And they all seem reasonable to me. It seems that really struck a nerve with you. But that's ok. It just means that when care was provided to you, others did a really shitty job of explaining things to you. And you're frustrated. And you should be. Ultimately, everyone in this thread is just trying to give you advice we think would be beneficial. And I've been trying to supplement that advice with education so your future interactions with providers would be better. Your health will thank you for it.

    I tried to stay out of this thread as the advice you needed had been posted and all I was doing was pissing you off. But I'll give one last peice of advice. I hope you see a psychiatric provider and get on appropriate meds. But know that the psychiatrist is probably going to make you uncomfortable. They'll probably piss you off. They'll likely say things you may not agree with. But they're trying to help you, and as hard as it is to not take it personally, try not to. As Kuro said (and I'm def stealing this), you know more about yourself and your own body, but you don't know more about your health. Let them try to help you. Myrrh, I sincerely mean this, I hope for the best for you.

  10. #50
    The Shitlord
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    Quote Originally Posted by Myrrh_Quetz View Post
    Okay, gonna try to phrase this that it doesn’t get read wrong or like I’m attacking anyone.

    I never said this stuff was normal. I said it’s the crap I deal with. If you get an asshole doctor, you’re stuck with it. The point of my stories was to try to get others to understand certain things. I mentioned a story and got told I was wrong because Doctors in the states have to be nice for the reason he stated. He admitted to knowing zero at how Canadian health care works. I have filled complaint after complaint on any and all doctors who treat me poorly. I started to record them as proof so things would stop being a “he said/She said”. I wasn’t try to say this is normal or anything like that. I did mention the challenges of attempting to sue or going to the press, because what I said there was true.

    I just wanted to see if other people who’ve dealt with cancer had any personal tips to get back to an acceptable % so I could go back to work. There was some great advice from people on that subject which I will be putting to use.

    And you’re probably right, I should move, provinces at the bare minimum, Countries at the Max. Sadly it’s just not that easy. First, my wife’s family live here. They’ve been great support.

    Second, moving costs money. I haven’t worked in over a year and I never qualified for sick leave, Employment insurance, or disability. My wife, she hasn’t worked in two and a half years. Her disability barely covers mortgage and other payments.

    Third. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again. No insurance company would ever touch my wife and I. So how would one go about affording medical care in the states?

    Fourth. I have never stated that I will not see the proper therapist for my issues. That is still a current plan.

    5th. Why would I lie?? Lying here gets me nothing. If I’m looking for advice, lying would make getting said advice harder. Lying to medical staff gets me nowhere, so again, why would I lie? It’s 1000000% useless or otherwise.

    And Finally, I do not speak to any medical staff with attitude. I have never and will never. I try to be as nice and understanding as possible. What I say in these threads is my anger, annoyance, and frustrations about what I deal with in hospital. Getting angry at medical stuff would only ever put me backwards in my health.


    Anyways. This thread is done. I was wishing to see if others had any other advice but at this point, it’s just turned into me acting like my dumb self, and just getting my whole thread derailed into people thinking I’m some sort of jackass.


    So I will end it with this. Thank you to those who helped me out and I apologize to the others. Have a nice night
    a functional professional relationship is more than just not copping an attitude. the behavior you've described on the part of your care team is not the behavior of a care team with which you have a good relationship. you'll note, i've made no assertions as to whose fault i think that is.

    similarly, you'll note i have not said i think you're actually lying. if you were lying, i think it would be more along the lines of distorting things to make yourself sound less like an asshat, but since you're still coming off like an asshat, either you're shit at lying or you're not lying.

    but the point i'm getting at is that in both of those cases, and with tyche, you've responded extremely defensively. this is a moderated portion of the board- even if we did get our jollies ragging on a sick person, you think sono and the other admins would let us do that here? the title of this thread is "looking for honest advice" and that's exactly what you got. If you wanted us to say what you wanted to hear, then you should have said so.

    i tell you these things because i want you to think about them. clearly, what you've been doing has not worked well for you. consider trying something, anything, else.

  11. #51
    Nidhogg
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    Quote Originally Posted by BaneTheBrawler View Post
    but the point i'm getting at is that in both of those cases, and with tyche, you've responded extremely defensively.
    Probably too late, but my main take away is this. Bain said it excellently.

    If the medical professionals are looking for cause to give you a hard time, seems like you are giving them just what they want to justify their actions. I cannot say if it is justified or not, but I see serious attitude as soon as there is any push-back from fellow BGers. You seem to think they are out to get you, maybe they are. However, I'm sure random healthcare worker loves being recorded by a stressed out sick person who they see as paranoid, and the impression can quickly shift from "injured before and justifiably paranoid" to "this guy clearly just wants drugs".

    I am not a medical professional, so I do not have any secret awesome advice. I was told back when my grandmother was on chemo that bananas helped with feeling sick, keeping food down, and long term recovery for a bunch of reasons. Other than that, I have nothing except "do your best not to be miserable" which while possibly helpful is not what you came here for.

  12. #52
    The Optimistic Asshole
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    Things have been hashed out over PMs. He cried. I gave him a third lung as a loaner. All's well.

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