NFL Week 12: Happy Turducken Day

[Bregor]

Go git daddy 'nother piece of turkey.

Record:
87-57 straight
68-73-3 ATS

THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 25TH

New England at Detroit (+7) - For all the great things about today's NFL, tradition is not one of them. Historic rivalries have given way to Twitter feeds. But one constant has been Detroit hosting a football game on Thanksgiving. Unfortunately, they will also continue the tradition of losing by two scores on Thanksgiving. The Pats offense is hot, and I don't see any way Detroit keeps pace. New England wins and covers.

New Orleans at Dallas (+4) - The other constant is America's Team playing on the day America celebrates the oppression of Native Americans. Dallas seems like a new team after Garrett's rise from the ashes of Wade, scoring points in bunches and playing inspired football. But N'awlins has gone ragemode since their embarrassing loss to the Cleveland Hillises, and I think they're looking forward to the national stage the same way they did when handling Pittsburgh on Sunday night in week 8. The unit to watch is the Dallas secondary, if they can slow down Breesus at all, they have a shot. I don't think they're up to it. Saints to win and cover.

Cincinnati at NY Jets (-9) - So after we're all stuffed full of poultry and beer, we're expected not only to stay awake for a third game, but to find NFL Network on our relatives' weird cable provider. What do you mean it's not digital? There's no menu? What the fuck! Lots of hype and jawing between Revis and TO, meh. New York is at home and outclasses Cincy in just about every way that matters, but they still like to keep it interesting. Jets to win, Bungles to cover.

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 28TH

Green Bay at Atlanta (-2) - Game of the week in my opinion. Green Bay's utter dismantling of the Vikes and Chilly's subsequent firing was one of the highlights of my week. I'm thinking the Pack is just a nose ahead of Philly as being the class of the NFC right now. But don't sleep on Matty Ice and Atlanta, especially at home. They put together a real solid performance on the road last week and have won four straight themselves. But I think Green Bay will be able to bottle up Turner and make them one dimensional, and Rodgers will beat Ryan in a shootout most days. Packers in the mild upset.

Pittsburgh at Buffalo (+6.5) - This line opened at 5 and has only moved up to 6 and a hook... wow. I don't know if people are buying Buffalo or disrespecting Pittsburgh. I understand the Bills are riding high after carving up the Bungles secondary last week, but this is the Steelers we're dealing with here. No one runs on them, only Brady has passed on them, and you'll be lucky to be get out of the stadium without being concussed or bitten. Pittsburgh to win and cover.

Carolina at Cleveland (-10) - MoJoDrew just took a huge knife and jabbed it into my heart last Sunday. I mean he just murdered me. I told all my friends to take Browns money line last week, and it looked so good the whole damn game. Ugh. Still, they've got to win this game, right? Mangini couldn't lose to Carolina's QB carousel? Still, Cleveland's not a team that's going to blow people out. Browns to win, Cats to cover.

Tennessee at Houston (-6.5) - When my high school friends and I do our fantasy football and baseball drafts every year, when someone makes a horrific pick, I as commissioner will turn to everyone and with as straight a face as I can keep, simply say "I have no information on this player." That's Rusty Smith, only in real life. Houston wins and covers.

Minnesota at Washington (-1) - So since Dallas has been energized by firing Wade, the Vikes will do the same this week, right? Not with Old Man Shrinkage as their QB. Fuck me, I hate betting on the Redskins, but I just don't see them losing this game. That line is essentially a pick'em, but Minnesota is really bad, right? Don't let me down, Shanny. Redskins win and cover.

Jacksonville at NY Giants (-7.5) - Fuck the Jags, they've been pretty lucky to get to 6-4. They've been outscored by their opponents by 50 points this season. Someone should teach them a lesson, and that someone will be Devin Thomas. Giants win and cover.

Kansas City at Seattle (+1.5) - Road favorites when the line is this small... hm. Seattle's been solid at home when Hasselbeck plays, and I feel like the Chiefs have played just a little over their heads. The last time I took the Seahawks as a dog at home, the Giants steamrolled them. It can't happen twice, right? Seattle in the mild upset.

Philadelphia at Chicago (+3.5) - BEARS. Eagles win and cover.

Tampa Bay at Baltimore (-7.5) - How long does Tampa have to keep winning for me to buy into them? One more week. Only way the Ravens don't take care of business is if they're looking ahead to the Sunday night game against the Steelers next week. Don't think it will happen. But that line looks a hair big to me. I'll say Baltimore wins, Tampa covers.

St. Louis at Denver (-4) - I was disappointed by the Rams effort last week, I really thought they would be able to hang around with the Falcons at home. Meanwhile, Denver is coming off an embarrassing loss as well, but should be able to put up some points in this one. Broncos win and cover as Orton goes for 400/5.

Miami at Oakland (-3) - Traditional "these teams are about even on paper, so the home team gets three" line. I'm guessing Miami will do everything in their power to get Henne back on the field, so I hate to have to pick this game three and a half days before kickoff. If Thigpen goes, I like Oakland a lot. If not... we'll see. Both teams failed to score a TD last week, and this one should be just as exciting. Right now I'll say Raiders win, Dolphins cover.

San Diego at Indianapolis (-3) - Go fuck yourself, San Diego. How do you always look so shitty early in the season, and then like the best team in the league after I've stopped betting on you? It ends this week, as Manningface is not going to allow his Colts to have a losing streak, especially in the dome. Colts win and cover.

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 29TH

San Francisco at Arizona (+1) - Well, it turns out that Troy Smith is not a very good quarterback! Go figure! I don't care which Smith (or even maybe a Carr) is playing for San Fran, Arizona's defense is just plain bad. I'm buying Singletary's ability to get his team up for a meaningless game, at least more so than Whisenhunt. 49ers win and cover.

[Tyche]

NFL week 12: tyches playing GT5 and forgot.

[Tyche]

Also, missing Miami @ oakland

[archibaldcrane]

Also, missing Miami @ oakland

Not an accident

[Rhinox]

Nice job. only complaint is there is a small misprint. It says Eagles win and cover.

Please correct that at your earliest convenience. Thanks

[Bregor]

Also, missing Miami @ oakland

Knew I'd mess it up somehow. Thanks boss, fixing now.

Edit: I was going off of Yahoo's odds page, and they forgot to list that game, lol.

[toqabowl]

Bears>Vick

[randomized]

i love bears fans lol

[Headspace]

Go git daddy 'nother piece of turkey.

Approved.


Initial posts lack trolling however.

[Demosthenes11]

browns by 500

peyton hillis watches watchmen

[Bregor]

browns by 500

peyton hillis watches watchmen

I like the cut of your jib.

[Headspace]

BUT WHO HILLISES PEYTON HILLIS?!

Sent from my Droid using Tapatalk

[Lordender]

http://img714.imageshack.us/img714/6...rstiff0000.gif

need some of this to happen today. I hope we show up to play today and not have a repeat of last year.

[Akiyama]

NFL week 12: tyches playing GT5 and forgot.

Rofl, so true.

[Soa]

Nice job. only complaint is there is a small misprint. It says Eagles win and cover.

Please correct that at your earliest convenience. Thanks

Agreed, its should say Eagles win and cover comfortably.

[Rhinox]

Agreed, its should say Eagles win and cover comfortably.

Wrong.

[Rhinox]

The cornerback for the other team?

[Dimmauk]

Sad segment on the pregame show. Everyone was crying.

[Demosthenes11]

feeling pretty confident in this game. It's a pretty clear trap game after 2 emotional wins and the jets are next week, but I dont think bieber is going to let them lose another letdown like in cleveland

[Demosthenes11]

tom doesnt look great. his throws are off by a foot or so