2013-14 NFL Week 6: Profound Sadness Edition starring the NFC East

[Krandor]

And to get it out of the way - Shit Poster, Shit Thread.

No one ever reads this shit anyways, so here's some gifs.

Thursday, Oct 10

8:25 PM - New Jersey Giants at Bears

http://www.businessinsider.com/image...ruggleface.gif

No explanation needed.

Sunday, Oct 13

1:00 PM

Cincinnati at Buffalo

http://cdn2.sbnation.com/assets/3267833/bernard.gif

Detroit at Cleveland

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Idk if Megatron is playing. If he his, flip that bitch to the Lions.

Oakland at Kansas City

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Carolina at Minnesota

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Pittsburgh at New Jersey Jets

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Philadelphia at Tampa Bay

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Green Bay at Baltimore

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St. Louis at Houston

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CAN HE KEEP THE STREAK ALIVE?

4:05 PM

Jacksonville at Denver

lol

Tennessee at Seattle

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Seahawks at home, Eliminator pick get

4:25 PM

Arizona at San Francisco



New Orleans at New England

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The Saints can play D this year, who knew?

8:30 PM

Washington at Dallas

Tony Romo is the only player in NFL history with 506+ passing yards, 5+ TDs and 0 INTs in a single game.

[Krandor]

Worthy of a second post

RIVERS IN PRIMETIME MOTHERFUCKERS

Monday, Oct 14

8:30 PM

Indianapolis at San Diego

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7301/1...94f82601_o.gif

Because fuck you that's why.

[Chun Liroy]

Why do they have to have the name NJ in them. It's bad enough that they play in our state

[Tajin]

B+ for effort and C for not including betting lines that I dont care about nor understand.
A+ for gifs.

[Cail]

Worthy of a second post

RIVERS IN PRIMETIME MOTHERFUCKERS

Monday, Oct 14

8:30 PM

Indianapolis at San Diego

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7301/1...94f82601_o.gif

Because fuck you that's why.

This is quite possibly the best post in the history of BG

[Krandor]

Why do they have to have the name NJ in them. It's bad enough that they play in our state

Because it's funny to me.

[Chun Liroy]

Because it's funny to me.

[nayaminfenrir]

I do read the long thought out predictions!! They're very well written, don't get lazy BG, stay classy

[Chun Liroy]

I do read the long thought out predictions!! They're very well written, don't get lazy BG, stay classy

Shut the fuck up faggot

[Cail]

I used to read them, but i got lazy. Now I just read where I know there will be funny

[Cail]

Ahmad Bradshaw ded. IR, out for the year

[Cail]

David Wilson dedish. Out this week vs DA BEARS

[nayaminfenrir]

Oii

[Cail]

The 2018 Super Bowl could be headed back to a recent host city. Or to one that hasn't staged the game in more than two decades.

New Orleans and Indianapolis, the sites of the past two Super Bowls, and Minneapolis are the three finalists to host the NFL championship game in '18.

Those cities were selected from a pool of six at the owners' meetings Tuesday. Should Lucas Oil Stadium get the game, it would be the first cold-weather stadium to host two Super Bowls.

"It proves that Indianapolis is really a unique city, being a medium-sized market in a colder market, without 80 degrees and beaches," Colts owner Jim Irsay said. "I think we have the unique ability in Indianapolis to really deliver a Super Bowl that gets pulled off in a way that's special."

New Orleans has hosted 10 Super Bowls, including last February's game that was interrupted by a blackout. That apparently didn't bother the owners during Tuesday's selection process.

"The Super Bowl is a celebration of unparalleled magnitude. What better time for New Orleans to host its record 11th Super Bowl than during a party 300 years in the making?" Jay Cicero, Greater New Orleans Sports Foundation president and CEO, said of the city's 2018 tricentennial.

Minneapolis last hosted the title game in January 1992. A $975 million stadium is going to be built in downtown Minneapolis, with the projected opening coming in 2016.

The NFL often rewards a city for building a new stadium with a Super Bowl, as was done in recent years for Detroit, the Phoenix area, the Dallas area, and Indianapolis.

"The Vikings organization and our political leaders in Minnesota fought a long battle, spent more than 12 years to secure the new stadium for the team and the state," said Lester Bagley the vice president for public affairs and stadium development for the Vikings, "and during that long and contentious debate the Vikings made a commitment to take the lead and advocate with the NFL to host the Super Bowl 2018 in Minneapolis.

"Minnesota stepped up to deliver a great new stadium, and we will push hard to deliver the reward."

The 2018 Super Bowl will be awarded next May. The next four Super Bowls are in New Jersey, Arizona, Santa Clara, Calif., and Houston.

.

[Cleverness]

So is this what it's like being a Browns/Jags fan, having a terrible record by week 5 and not knowing which games you can win anymore?

[Bregor]

http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/...ib3wo1_400.jpg

[Krandor]

http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/...ib3wo1_400.jpg

I won't lie, I actually do read your posts every week (I also read TMQ every week, and lord knows how long those go on for).

[tyven]

I'M GLAD IT WASN'T ME

[Omnipotent]

Posting so this shit pops up on my tapatalk

[Bregor]

Last week
M/L: 7-7
ATS: 6-8

Overall
M/L: 51-26
ATS: 38-36-3

BLECH. Watching the games on Sunday it seemed like everything was going wrong. The Dolphins floundered, the Bears stumbled, the Pats shit-assed, and the Broncos couldn't play defense. So I'll take 6-8 and run with it. Thank you for upset wins, Indy and Philly.


Bye week: Atlanta, Miami


THURSDAY, OCTOBER 10TH

8:30pm EDT, NFL Network

NY Giants at Chicago (-8) - Two-time Super Bowl MVP and elite quarterback Eli Manning is not having a good season. He leads the league in interceptions with 15 (tack on one lost fumble as well), he's taken 15 sacks, and the Giants have no running game (league-worst 56.8 yards per game) to help him out. New York's defense is also terrible, clocking in at 26th in yardage allowed per game (395.2) and dead last in points allowed per game (36.4). Things are so awful that the Jets are now the toast of Gotham. After starting 3-0, did anyone think it would be smooth sailing for Chicago? Not with a rookie head coach and everyone's favorite The League cameo under center. That said, they've been pretty consistent outside of the turnovers against Detroit. They failed to get a takeaway on Sunday, but sometimes Breesus just goes into God-mode and there's not much you can do about it. The chances New York plays a clean game like that are pretty much nil, so I like Chicago to get back on track, especially with GMarsh lighting a fire under their asses. Bears win and cover.


SUNDAY, OCTOBER 13TH

1:00pm EDT, CBS

Cincinnati at Buffalo (+7.5) - As soon as I disembark from the Bengals bandwagon, they speed off without me, leaving me as cold and wet as Shit-Ass Tom Brady on Sunday. Cincy has now beaten New England and Green Bay, but lost to Cleland. WE GOIN TO DA SUPA BOWEL!!!11. In all seriousness, the defense has looked great, with 11 sacks in the last three games and great secondary play. Offensively they still need to utilize all their weapons, but making it through their early schedule at 3-2 is pretty good. Buffalo gave up the lead two different times against Cleland, which is inexcusable. If EJ Manuel is healthy for the whole game, I have to think they are able to control the ball a little better. The defense is really making strides, as the defensive line is very good with Mario Williams and Marcell Dareus causing havoc up front, and Kiko Alonso all over the field. They need to avoid giving up big plays, especially on third down, but there are pieces to like about this Buffalo team. Unfortunately, they'll turn to Cleland cast-off Thad Lewis as their starting quarterback this week. With no threat of a passing game, Cincy should eat Spiller and FredJax for lunch. Bengals win and cover.

Oakland at Kansas City (-9) - NFL talking heads are raving about Terrelle Pryor, and with good reason. It's not your typical "the team won so talk about the quarterback" drivel, Pryor is probably the most improved player in the league right now and he's changed the entire offensive mindset. With such a weak offensive line, a player of Pryor's skills is necessary. I just don't know how sustainable the offensive success will be without better protection or a consistent run game. Even at 5-0, I wonder how many people are taking Kansas City seriously. Their opponents haven't been good, and the model of running with Charles plus Alex Smith's game-managing isn't especially inspiring. But I do love their defense, corners Brandon Flowers, Sean Smith, Dunta Robinson, and rookie Marcus Cooper (RUTGERS) have the ability to match up well with any team's wideouts, and I love safety Eric Berry. Throw in outside backers Tamba Hali and Justin Houston, and it all adds up to what I think is the AFC's best defense. I'm already looking forward to their matchup with Houston next week. Maybe they will be too, this is a classic trap game, but I like Andy Reid to keep them focused. Chiefs win and cover.

Pittsburgh at NY Jets (-2.5) - It's been a long time since Pittsburgh has been really bad at football. They've had at least six wins every season since 1988, when Merril Hoge was their feature back and Rod Woodson was just a second-year corner out of Purdue. They'll struggle to get six wins this season, but with Le'Veon Bell healthy and a bye week to get their shit together, I think you will see some improvement. The Jets, on the other hand, have a short week and are coming off a last-second win in Atlanta. New York actually has a decent run game, but you'd never know it with their three-headed running back committee combined with Geno Smith. Won't you think of the fantasy owners?!?! Last night I learned that Rex Ryan is once again calling the defensive plays, which makes you wonder why he stopped doing so in the first place. Whatever the reason, the defense is flourishing, with first-round pick Sheldon Richardson making an immediate impact on the interior. This should be an even game, and I love under-41.5, but Pittsburgh has to get off the schnide at some point. I'll take them in the upset.

1:00pm EDT, FOX

Detroit at Cleveland (+2.5) - I really hope that Calvin Johnson is healthy for this one, because Joe Haden is gonna shut that bitch down. With or without Megatron, we all saw what Detroit's offense is like when he's not a factor (286 yards, 9 points at Green Bay, not exactly a stout defense). Detroit's defense is equally vanilla, as they allowed Aaron Rodgers and company to go 7-for-16 on third down. Just imagine what Weeden, Gordon, and CAM'ROM will do.



This is going to be an ugly, mistake-filled game. Given the status of Calvin Johnson, Jabaal Sheard, and Quentin Groves, I would check the injury report before making any bets. As it stands now, I'll take Cleveland in the upset.

Carolina at Minnesota (-2.5) - Three weeks ago, Carolina destroyed the Giants by a score of 38-0. Other than that game, they've lost three times and scored only 36 total points. I know Mike Shula from his days at Alabama, and he was terrible there, too. It's a shame, since the defense really is quite good. Minny collected a solid win in London and then had a week off to gather itself and troll the fuck out of Derock. For some reason he is ENRAGED that the team has spent a grand total of zero draft picks to acquire a potential franchise quarterback. HOW COULD THEY? This is another under I really like (44). In the absence of any compelling reason to like the Panthers here, and Matt Cassel's workmanlike ability, I'll go with the home favorite. Vikings to win and cover.

Philadelphia at Tampa Bay (+1) - Ladies and gentlemen ("ladies" on the internet, who am I kidding?) here are your NFC East co-leading Philadelphia Eagles. So what if they're giving up almost 32 points per game? They'll just Chip Kelly their way to more points. So what if Vick's hamstring is already flaring up? IT'S FOLESERIN' TIME! Speaking of shitty quarterbacks, Mike Glennon gets the nod for the Bucs. It's just the latest in a series of bad decisions by Greg Schiano, who no doubt is feeling out of place in the NFL. Unlike RUTGERS, you simply can't hit, choke, or otherwise physically abuse your players whenever you want to. Eagles win and cover.

Green Bay at Baltimore (+3) - After a rocky 1-2 start, Green Bay had a complete team win over Detroit on Sunday. With a soft schedule coming up, I bet they really get a good streak going before their Monday night game against the Bears in week 9. Watching the Ravens/Dolphins game at a bar with my good friend who happens to be a Miami fan was brutal. With a 13-6 lead at halftime and Joey Flax looking awful, I thought Miami would pull away. Instead they got refball'd on a few bad pass interference calls, and needing a field goal to tie Joe Philbin utilized some of the worst clock management and play calling I've ever seen. In other words, the Ravens got bailed out in a big way. Against AR12 and the best top three receivers in the NFC, I think they'll get shredded pretty badly. Packers win and cover.

St. Louis at Houston (-7.5) - I told y'all that the Rams were pretty good. If you didn't trust them to beat Jacksonville in Eliminator, you deserve to lose. They have a brutal schedule and won't come close to a wild card, but they have plenty of talent and I have them on my radar for 2014. Hopefully Zac Stacy keeps the starting tailback job, he's a short but powerful runner with enough wiggle to get into space. I ALSO told y'all that Matt Schaub sucks a dick, so I'm stealing this from Krandor:

http://www.businessinsider.com/image...b-struggle.gif

(I love that the image is hosted on businessinsider dot com. HEY BUSINESS PEOPLE, SELL MATT SCHAUB. SELL SELL SELL!) Owen Daniels, who was second on the team in targets, is out for a while. This just puts more pressure on Schaub to force the ball to Andre Johnson and rookie DeAndre Hopkins. This should go well. Still, Houston's defense is legit, they should harass Slingin' Sammy Bradford all day. Houston wins, St. Louis with the points.

4:05pm EDT, CBS

Jacksonville at Denver (-26.5) - This line opened at -28, so people are actually betting on the Jags to come within four scores of Denver.



Good luck, bettors. If you told me Peyton Manning plays the whole game, I'd take the Broncos to cover in a heartbeat. But how much do you like Brock Osweiler? Am I the only one who watched him connect with Wes Welker-esque receiver Aaron Pflugrad at Arizona State? That duo did some work. That said, I know they'll take their foot off the gas, so the line gets dicey. But they could be up 50 by that point, so fuck it. Broncos win and cover.

Tennessee at Seattle (-13.5) - Going 21-for-41 for 247 and two picks is such a Fitzpatrick thing to do. Jake Locker's injury is really a shame, since Tennessee was just starting to build some momentum. Now, he could be heading toward the realm of moderately effective but usually injured, right along side Tim Couch and Kyle Boller. The defense has played well enough, but they haven't really stared down many offensive juggernauts either. Seattle lost last week, just like I said they would, away from the comforts of the Pacific Northwest. Back at home, they'll smash. I love how Leroy hates on Kaepernick and reps RussWils, when they have very similar stats and both teams have winning records. I wouldn't expect a Cowboys fan to understand. Seahawks win and cover.

4:25pm EDT, FOX

New Orleans at New England (-2.5) - Is this the game of the week? Ugh. Fuck both of these teams. With Atlanta's collapse, nothing is stopping New Orleans from taking over the NFC South. I'm sure they'll cruise until they have to go at Seattle or San Fran in the playoffs and get crushed. New England had a collapse of its own in Cincy, their offense looked downright putrid, but I should have known the Bengals secondary would be all over New England's inexperienced receivers. They should get Gronk back this week, which helps a ton, and if Amendola can stay not-ded then I think Brady has a big game. Patriots win and cover.

Arizona at San Francisco (-11) - By the end of the third quarter, Carson Palmer had no TDs, three picks, and a 12-6 lead. It's a quarterback league, amirite! Larry Fitzgerald had 14 targets in week 1, and only 26 targets in the four games since. That's a problem, and offensive guru Bruce Arians needs to figure out a way to get him the damn ball. San Francisco had a dominating win against Houston last week, but their quarterback didn't throw for 500 yards so who gives a shit. If you thought the defense was vulnerable with Aldon Smith out on the sauce, think again. 49ers win and cover.

8:30pm EDT, NBC

Washington at Dallas (-5.5) -



STOP PUTTING THE SHITTY NFC EAST IN PRIME TIME GOD FUCKING DAMN IT. Dallas wins, Washington with the points.


MONDAY, OCTOBER 14TH

8:30pm EDT, ESPN

Indianapolis at San Diego (+1.5) -



STOP PUTTING SHITTY PHIL RIVERS IN PRIME TIME GOD FUCKING DAMN IT. Colts win and cover.