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  1. #1
    THIS IS BREGOR'S STORY
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    Super Bowl XLVIII: Never count out Tyrannical Touchdown Tosser

    Last week
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    Overall
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    ATS: 132-124-10


    SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 2ND

    6:25pm EST, FOX

    Seattle versus Denver (-2.5)


    Well, BG, it's been a long and wonderful season. Before we get into this, let's take a moment and be thankful for all the wonderful things we received, including Pete Carroll swagging, Richie Incognito hate-speeching, Jim Schwartz derping, Dez Bryant really wanting to win, the Philip Rivers Spectacular, Jim Har-BAWWWWW, the metamorphisis of Shit-Ass Tom Brady into touchdown tom, "this fin coach", and too many animated gifs to count. I love these threads and I love all of you, even the Cowboys fans.

    First, the juice. This is the seventh Super Bowl appearance for Denver, and the third time they are favored. The previous times, they got carved up by Doug Williams and the Indigenous Peoples in Super Bowl XXII (-3.5) and they took care of business against the Dirty Birds of Atlanta in Super Bowl XXXIII (-7.5). This is Seattle's second Super Bowl, they couldn't break through on Pittsburgh despite almost 400 yards of offense in Super Bowl XL (+4). This year, the line has moved a little over the last two weeks. The Vegas consensus opened at a pick'em, then Seattle was briefly favored by a point. But by the time all the books had adjusted on the night after the conference championships, it settled at DEN-1.5 and has held steady at DEN-2.5 for a while now. The over/under is pretty solid at either 47 or 47.5, and after that you can get into all the prop bets about the coin toss, the National Anthem length, commercials, and other stupid crap. Biggest spread for a Super Bowl? San Fran was a 19-point favorite against the Stan Humphries-led San Diego Chargers in Super Bowl XXIX and they covered, then followed by the Baltimore Colts being a 17-point favorite over Broadway Joe Namath and the Jets in Super Bowl III (I shouldn't have to tell you what happened there). Fun facts: As far as my research goes, there has never been a pick'em in the Super Bowl. The closest was Super Bowl V (DAL-1 over Baltimore Colts, Dallas lost of course). For five straight Super Bowls (XXVIII to XXXII) the NFC was a double-digit favorite. The 90s were kinda boring with Super Bowls.

    Let's take a look at the major players here. Front and center is Pete Carroll:



    GodDAMN this man just exudes swagger. It's a shame I dislike USC and didn't watch much Pac-10/12 football while he was there, because I think I deprived myself of hundred of moments like this one. I don't think Swaggy Pete is the best X's and O's guy out there, but you know he will do two things; coach the hell out of his defensive backs, and give his players all the confidence in the world. Now we know where Marshawn Lynch got his "hold my dick" move from.

    Speaking of:



    Ladies and gentlemen, Jon Bois:

    Perhaps you arrived here from Google by searching:

    - BEASTMODE +BEASTMODE SITE:BEASTMODE.BEASTMODE
    - different types of modes examples
    - information about beasts
    That pretty much sums it up.

    And we couldn't go too long without talking about Seattle's quarterback since this is a quarterback league and quarterbacks quarterback quarterback:



    I didn't like the thinly veiled references to Russell Wilson being such a clean-cut, stand-up guy from the same sports media that cites Colin Kapernick's tattoos and Richard Sherman's post-game rant as being too "thug"-ish. Sherman posits (correctly in my opinion) that calling a black man a "thug" is a socially acceptable way of calling him the n-word. But not Russell Wilson! No tattoos! He married a white girl! Check out that guy's Dockers in the background! His dog is a motherfucking MINIATURE DACHSHUND! Oh yeah, and he was pretty efficient two weeks ago against San Fran. It's imperative on him to eliminate turnovers in this game, because giving the Broncos a short field is a recipe for disaster.

    Now, about that "thug":

    http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7439/1...2317b588_o.gif

    If I had a nickel for everyone who complains that sideline reporters are pointless and never get anything interesting, I could collect a lot of nickels and then lose them on sports betting. And now, Sherman gives us something genuinely entertaining, and people lose their shit over it. And then, everyone wants him to do it again on media day. Narrative! Bottom line is, he's the best defensive player in the league and I love watching him play. But then again, I've always been a defensive guy, especially press coverage, from the days of Antonio Langham in Tuscaloosa.

    Now, we can't talk about Denver without beginning with John Fox:



    I don't think a single animated gif of John Fox exists on the internet, so consider that he coached a team with Tim Tebow as its starting quarterback and won multiple NFL games, even one in the playoffs! It's been a long road for Fox, who has been coaching in the NFL for 24 seasons. This will be his third Super Bowl, he was defensive coordinator for the Giants in Super Bowl XXXV for the epic Kerry Collins-Trent Dilfer match-up, and of course coached the CLUTCH-led Panthers in Super Bowl XXXVIII. So he's seen some awful quarterbacks. Peyton Manning, however, is decidedly not-awful:



    Remember this? When it seemed like there was at least a chance that Peyton's career was over? How many debilitating neck injuries do you see, much less have the player come back to full strength? But the Tyrannical Touchdown Tosser doesn't know the meaning of the word "quit", but he does know the meaning of the word "Q Score". That bastard is in more commercials than Flo and the Wendy's girl combined. Peyton won a Super Bowl with a backfield of Dominic Rhodes and Joseph Addai. Now, he has a soldier:

    And a sensitive, patriotic one at that:



    Knowshon racked up almost 1600 total yards and 13 touchdowns this season, adding much-needed balance to the Broncos offense. The TTT is a statue, so a solid run game helps slow down edge rushers and keep their drives on pace.

    Now, when you need a big play in the passing game, you can look for my boy DEMARYIUS:





    Or you can look for Orange Julius:

    http://gridirongrit.com/wp-content/u...as-Cowboys.gif

    I'm not exactly sure what that is, but I like it.

    Then there's the handsome white guy:



    He's more athletic than he looks, I swear.

    Finally, you could throw to this guy, but I wouldn't recommend it in a big game:



    Point is, it's going to take each and every one of Seattle's excellent defensive backs to be on top of their game to slow down Denver's offense.

    So who do I like to win? This will be the third straight game where I'm left wondering how Seattle will get to 20+ points. They've pulled the trick in the friendly confines of the CLink the last two games, but I'm curious to see how the offense will operate at a neutral site. If Percy Harvin is as healthy as he and Carroll are boasting, he should add an important wrinkle to play calling. And you know the Seattle defense will be ready to play. But from week 1 on, this has been Peyton's year. His record-breaking season with elite weapons and a solid run game just looks too potent to be shut down. If Denver gets up early, they may or may not have success in grinding out a win the way they did to New England. Seattle's run defense is too good. But the key is if Seattle gets an early lead and tries to do the same, Denver's defense is almost as good. They might not have the names that Seattle has, but what Carroll does with his secondary, Jack Del Rio does with linebackers. Danny Trevathan, Wesley Woodyard, and Nate Irving can fly to the football, and consider how strong they'd be if Von Miller wasn't an idiot. And when you unleash the TTT, it could get ugly. Swaggy Pete and RussWils should definitely get a ring in Seattle, but it won't be this season. Denver 27, Seattle 17.




    http://www15.myfantasyleague.com/ffl...e_icon0001.jpg

    ONLY WINNERS GET WINGS

  2. #2
    C A P S UNLEASH THE FURY
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    all i got from the OP is that demaryius TD is filthy

  3. #3
    THIS IS BREGOR'S STORY
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    MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

    Also, Breaking Madden soon:


  4. #4
    I Am, Who I Am.
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    SuperBowl is cancelled, it's too cold.
    Maybe they'll have to work a day later in the school year to make it up.

    FUCKING TWUNTS MAN THE FUCK UP I WANT TO SEE A SNOWY MESSY CLUSTER FUCK OF A GAME WHERE EVERY PASS LEADS TO A FUMBLE

  5. #5
    Banned.

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  6. #6

    I hope it doesn't come down to this, but, as a precaution, I ordered 2 cartons of Quinoa sponges to absorb all the drool if Peyton enters god-mode and throws for 5 TDs and over 400yrds.

  7. #7
    Mr. Bananagrabber
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    What's the O/U on how many Papa John's pizzas Peyton's stores will sell?

  8. #8
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  9. #9
    Mr. Bananagrabber
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  10. #10
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    Turrible

  11. #11
    THIS IS BREGOR'S STORY
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krandor View Post
    Never count him out
    2.8% Eli Manning

    lol

  12. #12
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    Homer pick, going with Denver.

  13. #13
    Annihilation Banwave
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    Denver via anal rape.

  14. #14
    Piece of shit Bruins fan

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    Seattle by 10

  15. #15
    Mr. Bananagrabber
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brill Weave View Post
    Denver via anal rape.
    Yes, please.

  16. #16
    Ironing this Thread
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    Sticking with my preseason pick, Denver over Seattle. Denver covers.

  17. #17
    GATTACA!
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    Hoping for Denver because PMan is my dude and Adam King will have more chances

  18. #18
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    I picked Seahawks over Broncos in the Super Bowl before the season. Not going to switch now.

    Seahawks 28, Broncos 24.

  19. #19
    Member since 2006 and still can't think of a title.
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    Nothing short of Denver skullfucking the Hawks will make me happy.

  20. #20
    Pens win! Pens Win!!! PENS WIN!!!!!
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    I hope Seahawks, the swagger would be of epic proportions, that alone gets my vote!

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