gg, STL
Last week:
M/L: 14-2
ATS: 10-6
Overall:
M/L: 30-18
ATS: 28-19-1
BYE WEEK: New England, Tennessee
THURSDAY, OCTOBER 1ST
8:25pm EDT, CBS/NFL Network
Baltimore at Pittsburgh (+2.5) - There is one player on Baltimore worth a damn this season, and his name is Steve Smith Senior. The 36-year-old totaled 186 yards from scrimmage last week against Cincy, and the rest of the Ravens managed just 212 yards. We know Flacco and Forsett can succeed given the right circumstances, and Crockett Gillmore looks like a fine young tight end, but what happened? Oh, right, the TRASHMAN happened. Pittsburgh slumped its way through a tough road win in St. Louis but lost Large Ben for at least four weeks. With a short week to prepare how will Mike Vick run the offense? Probably by dancing around and chucking it to Antonio Brown. Vick says this is probably his last shot in the NFL, and as a result he plans to "play freely." If that means too much scrambling then CJ Mosley might put the Stone Cold Stunner on him and then it will definitely be his last shot in the NFL. This will probably be an ugly, sloppy game, but with the weapons around him I like Vick to at least tread water. Steelers in the upset.
SUNDAY, OCTOBER 4TH
9:30am EDT, CBS
NY Jets vs Miami (+1.5) in London -
I hope you do this for every NFC team, broven. The Dolphins have scored 51 points in their three games so far, which is 27th in the NFL, and their defense only has two takeaways. The lack of big play ability has really hurt Miami, who looked overmatched by Tyrod Taylor, Karlos Williams, and a punishing Buffalo defense. You know who's tired of waiting?
Jets win and cover.
1:00pm EDT, CBS
Jacksonville at Indianapolis (-9) - I know the Jags got curb-stomped by New England last week, but the first half wasn't as bad as it seems. It was only 13-3 when Bortles was running the four-minute offense, and an ill-advised pick gave Brady the ball with 1:47 left in the half. Of course they punch it in, then score 10 quick points to start the 3rd quarter, and that was all she wrote. I still think Jacksonville is a better team this year. Down 13 points in the 4th quarter in Tennessee, Andrew Luck engineered a 12-play, 98-yard touchdown drive to kick off a dramatic comeback win that Indianapolis desperately needed. They'll probably still win the division, but it was another multiple turnover day for Luck as he put his team in a big hole. Thanks to a soft schedule the next two weeks, they'll probably host New England with a winning record just so NBC can say "HEY LOOK AT THIS SUPER IMPORTANT RIVALRY GAME" before the Pats obliterate them. At least Al Michaels will keep me up to date on the point spread. Colts win, Jaguars with the points.
Oakland at Chicago (+3) - Well, it's finally happened. The Raiders are good, y'all. Now I know beating Cleland isn't impressive by itself, but they look pretty potent on offense. Derek Carr, Latavius Murray, and Amari Cooper are legitimate threats and remind me of a poor man's Roethlisberger, Bell, and Brown. The defense is a work in progress but Khalil Mack is still adjusting to the NFL and could be a lethal pass rusher. But how far have the Bears fallen where they're home dogs to Oakland? For all you need to know about the John Fox Bears, click here. Raiders win and cover.
Houston at Atlanta (-6.5) - I'm glad the Texans won on Sunday. After watching Hard Knocks this year, they all seem like really nice guys who try their best and enjoy the game of football. That doesn't make them a particularly good team, and only beating Tampa by 10 illustrates that point. But they probably get Arian Foster back this week, so there's still room for growth this season. At the end of last week's thread Moss linked us this article that illustrates just how much Julio Jones owns bones. There's stats, gifs, and a splendid narrative on my favorite footballer right now. Check it out. I think as a whole Atlanta is playing a little over its head, and the 1st half against Dallas looks worrisome for the defense. But I still like the matchups for them here. Falcons win, Texans with the points.
Kansas City at Cincinnati (-4) -
ALEX SMITH FINALLY THREW A TOUCHDOWN PASS TO A WIDE RECEIVER
Okay, now that that's out of the way, I'm not surprised that KC is 1-2 at this point. Losing to Denver and Green Bay is nothing to be ashamed of, and I still like them for a playoff spot. Unfortunately things don't get easier in Cincy this week. The good news is even Baltimore could move the ball against them, so hopefully Smith, Charles, and company and keep it close and hope for Bad Dalton to show up. I'm sure there's someone out there in fantasy land who had Julio Jones and AJ Green on their teams or in illegal online gambling completely legitimate daily leagues. I hope you had RedZone and a box of Kleenex handy on Sunday because it was a thing of beauty watching the Christmas Connection destroy the Ravens secondary. Is it safe to say that Jeremy TRILL and GIODUDE are in a share now? I think that's the right move long-term. Following Big Ben's injury I like Cincy to run away with the AFC North, but this one will be tight. Bengals win, Chiefs with the points.
1:00pm EDT, FOX
NY Giants at Buffalo (-5.5) - Eli, your thoughts on having to face the Bills defense this week?
Thanks, Eli. The G-Men tried to find some balance against Washington, running 31 times for a TRENT-like 2.7 yards per carry. Just chuck it deep to Ol' Dirty Beckham, son! Shady McCoy is nursing a hammy, but FSU rookie Karlos Williams looks pretty good in the feature back role. And Tyrod Taylor is 5th in the NFL in passer rating at 116.1 and I have no fucking clue how that happened. I'm still not entirely buying their offense but if they keep scoring like this I guess I'll have to, right? Bills win and cover.
Carolina at Tampa Bay (+3) - Carolina is a weird team, man. They win a decent amount of games, the go to the playoffs every so often, and they have one of the premier talents in the league at quarterback. But they've played three inferior teams and let them hang around all day just begging to be upset. To make matters worse, Luke KEEKLEE still isn't practicing, meaning he might have a really bad case of hot brain. I think they trend downward in a big way after this week, but they still have plenty in the tank to beat Tampa. The Bucs actually haven't looked too terrible, with Lavonte David single-handedly trying to keep their defense afloat. With Jameis "FHRITP" Winston still figuring things out, like "how to throw to Vincent Jackson sometimes," it'll be along road to a winning season. Panthers win and cover.
Philadelphia at Washington (+3) - Philly won last week, so of course EAGLES GOIN TO DA SUPA BOWEL. Seriously though, Ryan Mathews took control of the offense and took the pressure off Sam Bradford, who still only managed to complete 50% of his passes. With every game that passes I think Chip Kelly is turning into Steve Spurrier, he's just out of ideas. At least he can land at a Pac-12 also-ran and ride out his golden years making bank. The Redskins lost on Thursday night because Kirk Cousins loves throwing picks to the Giants. With a long week to prepare and hopefully a little more help from The Butler and Matt Jones, I actually think they can hang around with Philly. I don't know the last time I picked Washington to actually win a football game, but fuck it, Redskins in the upset.
4:05pm EDT, CBS
Cleveland at San Diego (-7.5) - Trent Dilfer says that Johnny Manziel is too immature to start in the NFL. What Dilfer fails to mention is that Josh McCown fucking sucks too much to start in the NFL. Well, it's not all on him. Cleland isn't getting any help from the run game as Crowell and Johnson only had 39 yards on the ground against Oakland. But you have McCown under center and teams stack the box on early downs. Shocking, I know. Speaking of shitty quarterbacks, we had a Kellen Clemens sighting in Minnesota last week, as he threw a touchdown in relief of Felipe Rios after the game was out of hand. No matter who's under center, Keenan Allen is getting the ball, as he's fourth in the league in targets. Look for him to abuse Cleland's lackluster non-Joe Haden defenders in a big way. Chargers win and cover.
4:25pm EDT, FOX
Green Bay at San Francisco (+8.5) - Aaron Rodgers is literally in a class by himself when it comes to passing. Don't believe me, believe all of archi's posts. What's impressed me more is Green Bay's defense, who sacked Alex Smith seven times on Monday night. Yeah, everyone on BG picks them to win the NFC most years, but there's a good reason for it.
No, that's not the same play twice. They were pass attempts #1 and #4 for Colin KaeperPick last week in Arizona. Remember when San Fran beat Minnesota and people thought they might actually be decent? WELP. Packers win and cover.
St. Louis at Arizona (-7) - Speaking of a "remember when in week 1" moment, the Rams have shit the bed twice since taking down Seattle. They managed just 258 yards of offense at home against Pittsburgh, and Todd Gurley hit the ground with a thud with 6 carries for 9 yards. That won't get it done against Arizona, who looks like the real team to beat in the NFC West. I thought they were just lucky last year before Palmer's injury, but they are a legit Super Bowl threat. Their offensive line is doing a fine job protecting Palmer and even made CJ0K look half decent last week. If they stay healthy, the sky's the limit. Cardinals win and cover.
Minnesota at Denver (-6.5) - Derock declared the Vikings the worst team ever after week 1, and they've rattled off two good home wins. They're one of the stingiest teams in league, allowing only 50 points so far, and Everson Griffen is picking up where he left off with 3 sacks this season after a career high of 12 in 2014. Gary Kubiak and Peyton Manning took a page from some college offenses are employed the pistol formation quite a bit last week. It didn't help the run game at all, but Manning looked comfortable throwing to the tune of 324 yards, 2 TDs, and a 101.7 passer rating. Every time one of you jerks says "LOL PEYTON'S DONE" he just keeps throwing more planet-destroying bombs to DEMARYIUS. And that defense is still fucking sick nasty. Broncos win and cover.
8:30pm EDT, NBC
Dallas at New Orleans (-4) -
lol
Cowboys in the upset.
MONDAY, OCTOBER 5TH
8:30pm EDT, ESPN
Detroit at Seattle (-10) - Last year I was impressed with how Jim Caldwell and Teryl Austin turned Detroit's defense into their strength. That's still the case, but this year it's by default since their offense is so putrid. They've scored 28 points in their last two games combined, and Fatt Stafford had three turnovers last week against Denver. And Seattle is not the place where you find offensive rhythm. The Seachickens got Kam Chancellor back and summarily crushed the Bears, even sitting Marshawn Lynch with a minor injury in favor of Thomas "Lou" Rawls who scampered for 104 yards rushing. The offense needs some fine tuning but they need this win with the mighty Bengals up next week. Seahawks win, Lions with the points.