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  1. #1
    BG's most likeable Québécois
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    To wed or not to wed, that is the question

    This is mostly a discussion subject, because i'm passing for the evil guy here.

    I've been with my Girlfriend for almost 2 years now, and all goes well. We are happy we love each other and we have kids and house plans.

    But now i'm getting the question asked by my GF's family and my own, and the question is. When is the wedding? I know it's said as a joke but i know they are a bit serious too. Her family loves me and my family loves her so it wouldn't be an issue on that.

    But i personally don'T believe in marriage. I feel it's overrated just for a paper. I know she wants to get married in the past, bt i've told them alot of times that marriage is out of the question for me.

    But not long ago they came back to the charge with another argument. "If yo uare not married, how are you gonna protect her if you die or something happens" In QC the other person has almost no rights if you are not married.

    So to 'protect' my GF financially if something happens it seems more complicated if you are not married. My GF even told me often I don't want a big wedding even if it's small i'll be happy.


    So my question is how do you see the wedding question. Do you guys wed to protect your other half incase somethings happens?

  2. #2
    Ridill
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    I'd look into the exact laws and what can be done. I'm not Canadian so have different situation but like all my aunts ended up in non official marriages and seems to work mostly though when one was dying she put my dad in charge of everything since by then she was only still living with the baby daddy for the kid

  3. #3
    The Anti Miz
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    if you love her enough to spend the rest of your life with her and it means that much to her and her family you'd marry her. If your believe that marriage is stupid or archaic or whatever outweighs your love for her then you it won't last anyway.

  4. #4
    Shimmy shimmy ya shimmy yam shimmy ya
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    I don't get the hesitation here. If it's overrated just do it and get it over with to avoid any unnecessary complications down the road. You seem to be of the mind you're going to spend the rest of your life with her anyways.

    Not marrying her "cuz reasons" just seems like a recipe for drama if she legit wants to make it official.

  5. #5
    BG's most likeable Québécois
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    Quote Originally Posted by Xno Kappa View Post
    I don't get the hesitation here. If it's overrated just do it and get it over with to avoid any unnecessary complications down the road. You seem to be of the mind you're going to spend the rest of your life with her anyways.

    Not marrying her "cuz reasons" just seems like a recipe for drama if she legit wants to make it official.
    Well the reason is mostly cash thingy.

    Even if she doesn'T want a big wedding. Buying a ring, renting a place and all that stuff feels pricey just for a paper. Since the goal is mostly financial protection i feel it's easier to just notary shit on other papers

  6. #6
    The Real Cookiemonster
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    well you could probably list her as your beneficiary or whatever it is called in a will?

    If it's like in Norway, the state recognizes both the big church weddings as well as civil ceremonies. While it doesn't matter for you, it does seem like it might matter a little for her, you love her, give it to her, even if it isn't a big deal to you (moreso the reason to just simply give it to her).

  7. #7
    Shimmy shimmy ya shimmy yam shimmy ya
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    Damn homie lol. You gonna deny your girl one of the most important days of a woman's life cuz you cheap lol.

  8. #8
    The Anti Miz
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ratatapa View Post
    Well the reason is mostly cash thingy.

    Even if she doesn'T want a big wedding. Buying a ring, renting a place and all that stuff feels pricey just for a paper. Since the goal is mostly financial protection i feel it's easier to just notary shit on other papers
    can you do courtroom wedding? don't have to have a ring to be married unless she is hella boujee and wants a big diamond

  9. #9
    Ridill
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    If it's just the cost associated with the ceremony just don't have one. My dad and step mom just made an appointment with whatever official (think was a judge) with some witnesses and we're good to go. Hell I didn't even find out for a couple of years later lol.

    As far as rings can go cheap on that too. Had a coworker handcraft one for his financee out of titanium for example

  10. #10
    BG's most likeable Québécois
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    Quote Originally Posted by Xno Kappa View Post
    Damn homie lol. You gonna deny your girl one of the most important days of a woman's life cuz you cheap lol.
    Fuck i keep hearing that Wedding can cost like 20k and more

    I love her, but i won'T ruin our spendings

  11. #11
    Shimmy shimmy ya shimmy yam shimmy ya
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ratatapa View Post
    Fuck i keep hearing that Wedding can cost like 20k and more

    I love her, but i won'T ruin our spendings
    Backyard weddings are cheap. My buddy just had one on like a 5k~ budget.

  12. #12
    Sea Torques
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    You don't need to buy a ring or rent a place to get married. Per http://www.etatcivil.gouv.qc.ca/en/m...vil-union.html

    Persons authorized to solemnize a marriage or civil union:

    Clerks and deputy clerks of Superior Court designated by the Minister of Justice
    Notaries authorized by law to execute notarized acts
    Any other person designated by the Minister of Justice, such as mayors, municipal or borough councilors and municipal officers, within the territory defined in their instrument of designation
    Ministers of different religions authorized by the registrar of civil status
    So unless you or she just wants a ceremony, there is probably only a minimal license fee and/or notary payment.

  13. #13
    I like to eat food
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    My dad just got remarried two weeks ago. They rented a space in a restaurant for about 40 family members and their spouses. We had drinks, dinner, and cake. My uncle got ordained so he could do the ceremony.

    I can't imagine it cost more than a couple thousand after all was said and done. If the cost of rings is your hang up, then get plain wedding bands that cost a couple hundred. Diamonds and other stones are what cost the most for these bands.

  14. #14

    Don't let anyone push you into anything you don't want to do. You will end up resenting them, and it will change the overall tone of the relationship. You should sit down with her and find out what she wants, and weight the pros and cons and try to come to an understanding that works for both of you.

    As for your death leaving her nothing... that is fucking dumb. A will is just as good if not better than a marriage. This is coming from someone who is been with their SO (both are not the marry type, and adding our income together would cost us more currently) for 12 years now. We both have wills and most things will ask who your beneficiary is (Life insurance).

    Also.... if her family is the one pushing for it... tell daddy to pony up the money, not sure of the culture where you live, but the girl's father tends to take some of the burden.

  15. #15
    Relic Horn
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    How expensive is it to rent a tim Hortons for the afternoon

  16. #16
    Relic Horn
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    Also rata having children

  17. #17
    Member since 2006 and still can't think of a title.
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    Just go the ultra cheap route and get a basic civil ceremony at the court house or something for the license. I've got a few friends who the only reason they are married is for insurance/in case i die i don't want her fucked over reasons, so it's not something completely out of the norm.

  18. #18
    The Anti Miz
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    i wish i werent married

  19. #19
    Atheist Douchebag.
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    I don't know the financial benefits of Canadian marriage.

    As others have said, you can just have a sweet backyard ceremony on the cheap and keep it small. Just get some Timbits and a big pile of poutine. BYOB

  20. #20
    I like to eat food
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zetanio View Post
    a big pile of poutine. BYOB
    Heaven.

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