Idiots in the news Part II: We're better than that guy that did that thing. Get off my lawn, Jaybar.

**Zetanio** · 2018-03-14 15:08

Originally Posted by zoobernut

Aren't there rules against opening overhead bins mid flight? Also it is easy to say that but remember she had a 6 year old and a 2 month old with her. Shit is more complicated on her end than you are making it appear.

is this a real question.

**Day** · 2018-03-15 08:25

holy shit lol, you really gotta read this whole story

https://www.buzzfeed.com/talalansari...RqV#.kw0OllBEv

A Washington state man who survived a samurai sword attack that authorities say was carried out by his now ex-girlfriend as he was sleeping told BuzzFeed News that his rigorous video game training left him with a lack of sex drive, which contributed to his former girlfriend's suspicions of infidelity.

Lovell told BuzzFeed News via Facebook Messenger that he only survived thanks to Wing Chun, a form of martial arts he became "obsessed" with after watching the kung fu movie Ip Man.

"I've been indirectly preparing myself for this night my whole life," Lovell said.

**chazzyphizzle** · 2018-03-15 08:33

rigorous video game training but still had time to become obsessed with wing chun AND get a girlfriend? there are only so many hours in the day bro y u lyin

**dasva** · 2018-03-15 13:54

Well based on what happened he clearly had to make a choice and wing chun and vidya > gf

**Anoat** · 2018-03-17 15:53

https://nypost.com/2018/03/16/famed-...site%20buttons

A cobra got the better of Malaysia’s famous “snake whisperer,” who died Friday from a bite from the deadly serpent, according to reports.

Abu Zarin Hussin headed the King Cobra Squad of the fire department, where he trained other smoke eaters to identify poisonous snakes and to capture them without killing them, Free Malaysia Today reported.

Firefighters in Malaysia are often called by people who discover unwelcome reptiles in their homes or in public places.

But on Tuesday, Hussin’s luck ran out when he was bitten by a poisonous king cobra during a snake-catching operation in Bentong.

Hussin, 33, who had been a firefighter for 10 years, rose to fame when he participated in the TV competition show “Asia’s Got Talent,” where his snake-handling act included kissing a serpent.

Friends described the snake-catcher’s patience and determination during dangerous missions.

“It will sometimes take hours, but Abu Zarin remained patient,” former volunteer fireman Mohd Ikhwan Hafizi Ali told the New Straits Times. “There were times when we stepped on the snakes’ nest when trying to catch the reptile at plantations and at times we were almost bitten by the highly poisonous cobras.”

Welp

**6souls** · 2018-03-17 19:09

Australian man, Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow, Fined for Implanting a Chip into his Hand that contained a Travel Ticket

http://www.bbc.com/news/technology-43428003

**Zetanio** · 2018-03-17 19:19

Sounds like a real smart dude.

**chazzyphizzle** · 2018-03-17 21:55

weaponized autism

**mallister** · 2018-03-18 16:26

So, um, some genius decided to euthanize the snapping turtle:

https://www.yahoo.com/news/snapping-...195424495.html

**Vaspinne** · 2018-03-18 16:42

Originally Posted by mallister

So, um, some genius decided to euthanize the snapping turtle:

https://www.yahoo.com/news/snapping-...195424495.html

"We have positive eyes er... you know people kind of look and omigosh there's really that neighbourhood, like Napoleon Dynamite's from there. And then now, now we've got national attention you know and WORLD attention on Preston and it's all negative."

What a fall from grace.

**Day** · 2018-03-18 16:48

i like how the concerns over relocating the turtle were stress and mortality of the animal being moved

so we killed it instead

**Salodin** · 2018-03-19 11:25

Kill a turtle cause it ate a puppy. What a shitty timeline.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G935A using Tapatalk

**mallister** · 2018-03-19 20:50

so, back home in texas, sheriff's deputy is eating at a bbq stand with his daughter and her bf, and randomly assaults, UFC ground and pound style, a 12 year old girl who was playing with a dog.

http://www.miamiherald.com/news/nati...205831069.html

**Vaspinne** · 2018-03-19 20:59

Originally Posted by mallister

so, back home in texas, sheriff's deputy is eating at a bbq stand with his daughter and her bf, and randomly assaults, UFC ground and pound style, a 12 year old girl who was playing with a dog.

http://www.miamiherald.com/news/nati...205831069.html

It was a "tough choice but the right call" to fire the guy? A tough choice? Are you fucking kidding me Texas? Goddamn.

**mallister** · 2018-03-19 21:13

dude is out on bond, too. wtf is his aggravated assault charge?

**Byrthnoth** · 2018-03-19 21:25

Originally Posted by Williamson County Sheriff

“WillCo demands professionalism.”

lmao

So profesh that the abbreves are off the chain.

**dasva** · 2018-03-19 21:51

Step dad is a real mvp though

“I seen him on top of her, he was hammer fisting her, it was like UFC style,” said Russell Cope, victim’s stepdad. He ran to the patio and attempted to punch Danford in the face, but he told police it didn't phase the former deputy. That's when Cope kicked Danford with his steel-toed boot in the head and Danford finally rolled off the victim and appeared unconscious, according to court documents