NFL Week 2: The mulligan week for underperformers.

[Tyche]

Buffalo Bills at Miami Dolphins (-1.0) - Bills have no one to play safety. They're traveling on a short week. It's gonna be a thousand degrees, although still a night game. Miami has busted out the best looking field in sports.

Buffalo will spoil it. Bills 23-20.

Las Vegas Raiders at Baltimore Ravens (-7.0) - Looking ahead at this slate isn't looking great for competitive games. Baltimore, write the score.

Los Angeles Chargers at Carolina Panthers (+5.0) - Don't like cross country travel and Puka going to IR. Also don't like anything about Carolina. Still, they gotta win one, right? Carolina with an upset. 17-13.

Shit, I just noticed I broke down the wrong LA team. Don't curr. Leaving it.

New Orleans Saints at Dallas Cowboys (-6.0) - Probably 2 of the best looking teams in the NFL last week. Still, New Orleans isn't beating up on their division, now they're drawing a very good Dallas team that's going to be looking to keep up with Philly, who are facing a weak Atlanta squad this week. 35-24 Dallas.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Detroit Lions (-6.0) - Media darling player vs media darling coach. Should be a handful of explosive plays before Detroit ultimately pulls out a W. 28-21 Detroit.

Indianapolis Colts at Green Bay Packers (-4.0) - Malik Willis ain't winning this game. Colts 20-13.

Cleveland Browns at Jacksonville Jaguars (-1.0) - I have no clue on this game. Gonna pick Jacksonville just so it makes Miami look better. 14-10 Jacksonville.

San Francisco 49ers at Minnesota Vikings (+6.0) - San Fran dismantled the Jets without their best player. Brian Flores ain't stopping them. 30-17 Niners

Seattle Seahawks at New England Patriots (+2.5) - Don't know how much last week told us about either of these teams. Seattle was facing a rookie QB and New England came outta fucking nowhere. Fuck it, I'll take home team. 28-24 Pats.

New York Jets at Tennessee Titans (+4.0) - you probably don't want to start your Superbowl aspirations with 2 Ls when one of the other division teams will be 2-0. Tennessee should be a W for them, but I think Tennessee will keep it close and the Jets defense will ultimately take the W from Levis on the final drive. 24-21 Jets

New York Giants at Washington Commanders (-3.0) - no one is going to bet this game or watch this game. It is a pointless game, as neither will finish the season .500 or better. Yawn. Maybe break out those uniforms again gmen. 7-6 Daniel Jones.

Los Angeles Rams at Arizona Cardinals (-1.0) - Don't like cross country travel and Puka going to IR. Also don't like anything about Carolina Arizona. Still, they gotta win one, right? Carolina Arizona with an upset. 17-13.

Cincinnati Bengals at Kansas City Chiefs (-4.0) - cue side eye meme. 24-20 Bengals.

Pittsburgh Steelers at Denver Broncos (+3.0) - Is fields starting? Are we gonna see Bo Nix vs Justin Fields? Of course not, no one is going to see that. Broncos 28-24.

Chicago Bears at Houston Texans (-3.0) - Is this the actual line? International game? What the fuck am I missing? 34-17 Texans

Atlanta Falcons at Philadelphia Eagles (-3.5) - Another line that seems low. Atlanta looks like a dumpster fire. Philly looked competent in a terrible environment. 30-20 Saquans.

[Krandor]

CMC isn't the Niners best player. That would be Trent Williams

[Weltall]

Do you have Malik Willis leading the Pack to those 13 points or....

[Tyche]

CMC isn't the Niners best player. That would be Trent Williams

Fred Warner.

[Weltall]

It is def Trent Williams

[Mertron]

we talking about good players?

https://x.com/eagles/status/1833898714823614606?s=46

[kuronosan]

Bills v. Miami - I think the only way Miami wins here is if Josh Allen comes in with his pick machine. I'm still going with Miami just because I honestly think the Bills are in for a crippled season.

Raiders v Ravens - Baltimore isn't losing this game.

Chargers v Carolina - I get the feeling Panthers are tanking this year and aren't winning this game.

Saints v. Boys - Cowboys got this one. They are still getting through the imposter weeks and I think their wins will look inflated at first until they reach and eventually lose in the playoffs.

Bucs v Lions - Lions by far. Will probably be a good game though.

Colts v Packers - Unless they sign Tannehill or someone not named Malik Packers are done until Love returns.

Browns v. Jags - Browns here. Jags peaked. It'll be close.

49ers v. Vikings - Vikings will be soundly defeated here but will put up somewhat of a fight.

Hawks v Pats - Pats looked okay last week, and I think they win this week too.

Jets v Titans - Jets will finally score a win unless Rodgers tears another rope in his body peyote can't fix during half time.

Giants v Commies - not even Danny Dimes could lose this one.

Rams vs Cards - I think Rams still win this one.

Cats vs Chiefs - honestly this could go either way, but I think it's too early for Burrow to Burrowhead this year. I think we win but with a slim margin.

Steelers vs Broncos - Denver. Bo Nix needs to find his rhythm and it might just be here.

Bears v Texans - a good game, but ultimately Texans will win it.

Falcons vs. Eagles - Eagles are going to trounce these guys.

[Cail]

shitty thread title. so many options too

[Celeras]

Clearly trying to bait me into not streaming the Colts D, BUT I AIN'T BUYING

https://twitter.com/Peter_Bukowski/s...51632410698116

[Xno Kappa]

I wouldn’t be surprised if the colts was the most started defense this week lol.

We already had someone use FAAB on them

[archibaldcrane]

Colts are -3, not the Packers

Sent from my SM-A546U using Tapatalk

[Tyche]

Xno, can we borrow Coach Cox for a bit to summon the necessary vibes?

[Xno Kappa]

[Melena]

I wouldn’t be surprised if the colts was the most started defense this week lol.

We already had someone use FAAB on them

I swapped to the Chargers. Pretty much any team playing the Panthers should feast.

[Weltall]

Picked up the Chargers week 1 because I didn't like my Ravens D vs. KC. Very happy this week :D

[Krandor]

Have to bench them for a few choice games through the season (KC/Baltimore) but the Chargers defense looking like an option to just ride out for most of the season since their schedule appears quite soft

[Celeras]

Dude flat out skipped the combine and pro day, then comes out as the slowest mofo on the planet lol. Oof. (lol @ fat threshold)

https://twitter.com/SethWalder/statu...72127100858660

[Weltall]

He is either injured, slow, or not giving close to full effort.

Any or all are bad.

[Krandor]

He's not a super speedy player but he didn't look slow in college, so it's either some unknown injury or laziness.

[Weltall]

Josh Allen over 246.5
Total over 48.5

Time to lose money

Edit: Parlay with a Josh Allen anytime and we are cooking