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  1. #21

    Re: lmfao

    Quote Originally Posted by FiftySplit
    yes i am a little pissed that peeps have to run there gd mouth i have a key board with keys wore out my apologies its funny on that lol i am guessing about keys hehe the tehe thing was a joke learn to take one i dont take hand outs i offered to pay them back if yo uread that thats all i dont want to argue with you ok and for some one that wants to argue i will end the post for you and ignore what you have to say i did not come here to argue i come here to get a world pass to get the f off my server now sorry for any inconveince of what ever i may have caused but you running and crying over every gd post i make just be quiet its not tcalled to run your fu***** i asked a favor and i said i would pay it back joke the girl was said cause no one beleives any girls play this game i have offered to prove the crap to every one why do you think i offered valefor says i am not a girl so i offere to prove it thats it it didnt call for your stupid posts thank you and have a nice day like i said i apologise for any rude statements i have said
    HARRR?

    <.<

  2. #22
    Bagel
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    1,475
    BG Level
    6
    FFXI Server
    Bahamut
    WoW Realm
    Drenden

    Holy shit, there was not one mark of punctuation! I looked...

    Going limp...

  3. #23

    Quote Originally Posted by Jerseyprophet
    Holy shit, there was not one mark of punctuation! I looked...

    Going limp...
    I hope you're not depending on me, because, uh...yeah...{I'm not up for it}

  4. #24
    Babyorphan
    Guest

    Hm.. I already believe girls play this game, my fianceé plays

    HARRRRR Jersey HARRRRRRRRRRRRR

  5. #25

    Re: lmfao

    Quote Originally Posted by FiftySplit
    yes i am a little pissed that peeps have to run there gd mouth i have a key board with keys wore out my apologies its funny on that lol i am guessing about keys hehe the tehe thing was a joke learn to take one i dont take hand outs i offered to pay them back if yo uread that thats all i dont want to argue with you ok and for some one that wants to argue i will end the post for you and ignore what you have to say i did not come here to argue i come here to get a world pass to get the f off my server now sorry for any inconveince of what ever i may have caused but you running and crying over every gd post i make just be quiet its not tcalled to run your fu***** i asked a favor and i said i would pay it back joke the girl was said cause no one beleives any girls play this game i have offered to prove the crap to every one why do you think i offered valefor says i am not a girl so i offere to prove it thats it it didnt call for your stupid posts thank you and have a nice day like i said i apologise for any rude statements i have said
    Translation: I can't speak any proper fucking English. :D

  6. #26

    oh wow

    Oh! WOW! you are a kid no more posts to a moron like you! Thank you little kid good day

  7. #27

    Re: lmfao

    Quote Originally Posted by Mithracat
    Quote Originally Posted by FiftySplit
    yes i am a little pissed that peeps have to run there gd mouth i have a key board with keys wore out my apologies its funny on that lol i am guessing about keys hehe the tehe thing was a joke learn to take one i dont take hand outs i offered to pay them back if yo uread that thats all i dont want to argue with you ok and for some one that wants to argue i will end the post for you and ignore what you have to say i did not come here to argue i come here to get a world pass to get the f off my server now sorry for any inconveince of what ever i may have caused but you running and crying over every gd post i make just be quiet its not tcalled to run your fu***** i asked a favor and i said i would pay it back joke the girl was said cause no one beleives any girls play this game i have offered to prove the crap to every one why do you think i offered valefor says i am not a girl so i offere to prove it thats it it didnt call for your stupid posts thank you and have a nice day like i said i apologise for any rude statements i have said
    Translation: I can't speak any proper fucking English. :D
    Shorter translation: JP ONRY

  8. #28
    Bagel
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
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    Drenden

    I'm gonna give yall some more, because I personally love these

    All credits to whoever the hell Bloodninja, etc are. Found em in the Pwnd! Forums.

    Bloodninja: I lick your earlobe, and undo your watch.
    Sarah19fca: mmmm, okay.
    Bloodninja: I take yo pants off, grunting like a troll.
    Sarah19fca: Yeah I like it rough.
    Bloodninja: I smack you thick booty.
    Sarah19fca: Oh yeah, that feels good.
    Bloodninja: Smack, Smack, yeeeaahhh.
    Bloodninja: I make some toast and eat it off your ass. Land O' Lakes butter all in your crack. Mmmm.
    Sarah19fca: you like that?
    Bloodninja: I peel some bananas.
    Sarah19fca: Oh, what are you gonna do with those?
    Bloodninja: get me peanuts. Peanuts from the ballpark.
    Sarah19fca: Peanuts?
    Bloodninja: Ken Griffey Jr. Yeaaaaahhh.
    Sarah19fca: What are you talking about?
    Bloodninja: I'm spent, I jump down into the alley and smoke a fatty. I throw rocks at the cats.
    Sarah19fca: This is stupid.
    Bloodninja: Stone Cold Steve Austin gives me some beer.
    Bloodninja: Wanna Wrestle Stone Cold?
    Bloodninja: Yeeaahhhh.
    Sarah19fca: /ignore
    Bloodninja: Its cool stone cold she was a bitch anyway.
    Bloodninja: We get on harleys and ride into the sunset.

    ---------------

    Bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
    DirtyKate: K, but don't tell anybody
    DirtyKate: Who are you?
    Bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
    Bloodninja: And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
    DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
    Bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
    DirtyKate: Haha! OK
    DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.
    Bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
    DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!
    Bloodninja: Is this a delivery?
    DirtyKate: Umm...Yes
    DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...
    Bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.
    **pause**
    DirtyKate:I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
    Bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.
    Bloodninja: I'm on my way now though
    **pause**
    DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.
    Bloodninja: How did you know?
    Bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
    Bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
    DirtyKate: ooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
    Bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?
    DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
    Bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
    DirtyKate: What the fuck?
    DirtyKate: You perverted piece of shit
    DirtyKate: Fuck

    ------------------

    Bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
    MommyMelissa: Sure, you into vegetables?
    Bloodninja: What like gardening an shit?
    MommyMelissa: Yeah, something like that.
    Bloodninja: Nuthin turns me on more, check this out
    Bloodninja: You bend over to harvest your radishes.
    (pause)
    MommyMelissa: is that it?
    Bloodninja: You water your tomato patch.
    Bloodninja: Are you ready for my fresh produce?
    MommyMelissa: I was thinking of like, sexual acts INVOLVING vegetables... Can you make it a little more sexy for me?
    (pause)
    Bloodninja: I touch you on your lettuce, you massage my spinach... Sexily.
    Bloodninja: I ride your buttocks, like they were amber waves of grains.
    MommyMelissa: Grain doesn't really turn me on... I was thinking more along the lines of carrots and zucchinis.
    Bloodninja: my zucchinis carresses your carrots.
    Bloodninja: Damn baby your right, this shit is HOT.
    MommyMelissa: ...
    Bloodninja: My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love. My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky cauliflower of love.
    MommyMelissa: What the fuck is this madlibs? I'm outta here.
    Bloodninja: Yah, well I already unleashed my cauliflower, all over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see. Bitch.
    MommyMelissa: whatever.

    -------

    Bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
    BritneySpears14: Aight.
    Bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
    BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, Bloodninja.
    Bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
    BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
    Bloodninja: Me too baby.
    BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
    Bloodninja: I cast Lvl 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
    BritneySpears14: Hey...
    Bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl 8 Penis of the Infinite.
    BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
    Bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty of the Beyondness.
    BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
    Bloodninja: Don't fuck with me biznitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
    Bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl 2 Druid.
    BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece.
    Bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
    Bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
    Bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
    Bloodninja: Baby?

    ----------------

    Bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.
    j_gurli13: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
    Bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
    j_gurli13: haha, ok lets go.
    j_gurli13: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
    Bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
    j_gurli13: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
    j_gurli13: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
    Bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.
    j_gurli13: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.
    Bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They fucking charge your ass.
    j_gurli13: stop, cmon be serious.
    Bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
    Bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
    j_gurli13: thats it.
    Bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
    Bloodninja: Fuck am I hard now.

    -------------

    BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
    eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
    BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
    eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
    BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
    BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
    eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
    BritneySpears14: What the fuck, I told you not to message me again.
    eminemBNJA: Oh shit
    BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you fuck up.
    eminemBNJA: Oh shit
    eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something

    __________


    Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
    Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
    Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 280 pounds.I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart.I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.
    Sweetheart: I want you.Would you like to screw me?
    Wellhung: OK
    Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom.There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table.I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
    Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
    Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
    Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse.My hands are trembling.
    Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
    Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
    Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure.The cool silk slides off my warm skin.I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
    Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in your blouse.I'm sorry.
    Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
    Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
    Sweetheart: Don't worry about it.I'm wearing a lacy black bra.My soft breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
    Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra.I think it's stuck. Do you have any scissors?
    Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly.I'm reaching back undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
    Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
    Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all over me.
    Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!
    Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.
    Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.
    Sweetheart: What?
    Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.
    Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
    Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.
    Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard tool.
    Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
    Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
    Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out nibbling on you...umm... wait a minute.
    Sweetheart: What's the matter?
    Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
    Sweetheart: Are you OK?
    Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
    Sweetheart: Can I help?
    Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
    Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
    Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
    Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
    Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
    Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.
    Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost. Where's the bedroom?
    Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
    Wellhung: I found it.
    Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.
    Wellhung: Me too.
    Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately-our naked bodies pressing each other.
    Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
    Sweetheart Why don't you take off your glasses?
    Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on the night table.
    Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
    Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward the bathroom.
    Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
    Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet. I lift the lid.
    Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
    Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't find it. Uh-oh!
    Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
    Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
    Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
    Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know ...thing...in your...you know...woman's thing.
    Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
    Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
    Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
    Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
    Sweetheart: What?
    Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
    Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on my face.
    Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
    Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
    Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture frames and your candles.
    Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
    Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.
    Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
    Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!

    -----------------------------

    I.F.: You ready yet? Im bearing to go!
    SexyKarla17: Yhea im slipping out of my clothes right now, what do you look like?
    I.F.: a Kodiac bear
    SexyKarla17: ?
    I.F.: Im soft naked, fuzzy and waiting for you to come mount me
    SexyKarla17: Oh I love cute fuzzy bears, I walk up and get on top of you stroking your soft hair, kissing you gently as my move my way down your stomach
    I.F.: I growl to warm you my cubs are near
    SexyKarla17: huh?
    I.F.: Bears get fuckin pumped when anyone is near their cubs
    Sexkarla17: yhea hehe dont be silly..
    SexyKarla17: I love how you growl as I continue to kiss you, while taking off your pants.
    I.F.: Bears dont wear pants and you should cover yourself in Honey now
    SexyKarla17: hehe you would love to lick that off me huh. I pour honey all over my warm wet body waiting for you to start licking it off me slowly
    I.F.: I sniff the air to see where the sweet scent of the honey is coming from, while slowly snorting and walking towards you
    I.F.: I Growl again, and start to bite you
    SexyKarla17: Yhea that feels good..ooooo...not too hard now
    I.F.: I bite harder peeling flesh from your stomach, and look up into your eyes to show you my mouth dripping with your warm blood mixed with honey, I then I let my cubs rip apart your limbs and play with you like a ragdoll.
    SexyKarla17: what the fuck?
    I.F.:uuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh and im spent.

    ------------------------------------

    I.F.: My shit is hard you ready to jump aboard?
    1hOttYeVe: oh yhea im so wet right now
    I.F.: Why you just shower?
    1hOttYeVe: no im wet for you
    I.F.: Did you ever play with supersoakers when you were a kid? or that gator shit you would dive and slide down, there was that badass pool at the end of it.
    1hOttYeVe: What the fuck are you talking about? You wanna cyber or not?
    I.F.: I do! Sorry...I just didnt know why you were wet...then you say your wet for me, and im thinking I didnt even throw water on you...
    I.F.: Im sorry lets continue!
    1hOttYeVe: alright then...I walk over to you and start kissing your neck and chest
    I.F.: I pop like 16 boners
    1hOttYeVe: what the fuck!
    I.F.: what?

    -------------------------------------

    Partner6: So you're really a 18 yr old girl right?
    J-Dogg: Yeah, J for Julie.
    Partner6: So whats with the "Dogg"
    J-Dogg: Uh, It's cause I'm into the latina gangs and shit. You know, rollin with tha homies and shit.
    Partner6: Oh, uh ok thats cool. So you ever seen a gun?
    J-Dogg: Yeah like I got 6 guns.
    Partner6: Thats cool, so you wanna see my gun?
    J-Dogg: hehe, of course baby.
    Partner6: I pull off my pants and show you my "gun".
    J-Dogg: Ohh, it's so big.
    Partner6: Yeah, what you want to do?
    J-Dogg: Umm, i guess stroke it or something.
    Partner6: It likes that.
    J-Dogg: aight.
    Partner6: Keep talking to me baby...
    J-Dogg: I kiss you on the mouth, hard, but then gently.
    Partner6: Mmmm, daddy like.
    J-Dogg: I unzip my pants...
    Partner6: Yes, show me what you got.
    J-Dogg: I pull out my schlong, and rub it on your breasts...
    Partner6: WTF?!
    J-Dogg: Oh shit, I meant, your schlong! your schlong!
    Partner6: I've had it with you queers trying to cyber me, I only fuck women...
    J-Dogg: Shit just don't shoot me man, I wasn't serious about the guns I have, I'm unarmed!
    Partner6: You dipshit.
    J-Dogg: I whimper to myself...
    J-Dogg: please don't shoot me Mr.

    ---------------------------------------

    J-Dogg: I see you in line at the supermarket. Our eyes meet.
    Partner8: Who the fuck are you?
    J-Dogg: I mouth the words to you, as if in slow motion:
    J-Dogg: Fuck me, Fuck me.
    J-Dogg: My wishes are like poetry in your eyes. We want this moment to last forever.
    Partner8: OMFG are you trying to cyber me?
    J-Dogg: We are like two dancers, for whom the music never stops. I Kiss the top of your hand. You are taken aback by the bulge that forms in your thigh.
    Partner8: Is that like cancer?
    J-Dogg: If cancer is our love, then I hope you don't have the technology of chemotherapy.
    Partner8: Good one romeo.
    J-Dogg: You grab the bulge that you feel. you tihink it must be taking over your mind, theres nothing else you can think of. My tubesteak to you is like a beautiful japanese haiku.

    The salmon swim at night.
    Towards your room.
    The snow and the moon.

    Partner8: that was never a haiku.
    J-Dogg: To your light bulb I am the Thomas Edison of your sex. Withought my light you would be lost in a sea of darkness.
    Partner8: That made even less sense than your "haiku"
    J-Dogg: So you ready to fuck then?
    Partner8: You unbutton my pants, spew your load at the sight of my underwear, and your spent.
    J-Dogg: ...
    Partner8: ?
    J-Dogg: I'm spent.

    -------------------------

    Jdogg: Hey
    QT-Pie: Hey
    Jdogg: whats goin on
    QT-Pie: Nothing. Who are you?
    Jdogg: Jdogg. Wanna cyber?
    QT-Pie: what does that mean?
    Jdogg: what are you wearing?
    QT-Pie: T-shirt. Jeans.
    Jdogg: Garter belt?
    QT-Pie: Ummm...no.
    Jdogg: Are we gonna cyber or not?
    QT-Pie: uh, okay.
    Jdogg: Sweet, I start by rubbing your ass all around. You love this.
    Jdogg: You're wet already. I can smell your pussy stink from here.
    QT-Pie: WHAT?!
    Jdogg: I execute standing position 12 from the Kama Sutra. Passion fills the room. Your head is close to the ceiling fan.
    Jdogg: You leave everything to Jdogg.
    Jdogg: I am completely inside of you. You are my dick puppet. I put on a little play.
    QT-Pie: This is weird. I should go.
    Jdogg: I drop you on the ground, and lay a stripe down your back.
    QT-Pie: A stripe?
    Jdogg: I need a sandwich.
    QT-Pie: You're a freak.
    Jdogg: I was great. You loved it.

  9. #29

    Why

    Why Should i even use them its a game its a post on a forum it dont count for a grade wait heres one for me F lol harrrr i am sorry to that post. that is the funniest shit i have ever read

  10. #30

    LOL, That one with MommyMelissa pwns.

  11. #31
    Bagel
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    1,475
    BG Level
    6
    FFXI Server
    Bahamut
    WoW Realm
    Drenden

    She said Harrrr lol.

  12. #32

    I'm not even going to begin to wonder where in the world you acquired these o.o

  13. #33

    harrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

    what ever hehe say more please lol those are funny as hell

  14. #34
    Bagel
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    1,475
    BG Level
    6
    FFXI Server
    Bahamut
    WoW Realm
    Drenden

    It didnt need a private message, young man-thra.

    Here's all I could dig up on the forum:

    VictimX_27: Hi there!
    cheesedog: HEYA!
    VictimX_27: What u up 2?
    cheesedog: Nice English.
    cheesedog: Did you learn that on the short bus?
    VictimX_27: Get fucked
    cheesedog: I'm just joking relax
    VictimX_27:
    cheesedog: What's your name?
    VictimX_27: Whats yours?
    cheesedog: I asked you first.
    VictimX_27: I asked you second
    cheesedog: Did I time just warp to middle school?
    VictimX_27: huh
    cheesedog: Never mind. My name is Johnny
    cheesedog: Johnny Cheesedog
    VictimX_27: Thats not your real name
    cheesedog: Why isn't that my real name?
    VictimX_27: No one has the name Cheesedog as a last name
    cheesedog: Well I do. Whats wrong with it?
    VictimX_27: Nothin i suppose
    VictimX_27: Is that your real pic in that av?
    cheesedog: Yes it is
    VictimX_27: Very handsome
    cheesedog: Thanks
    VictimX_27: You kinda look like eminem
    cheesedog: Fuck you.
    VictimX_27: HEY! I meant that in a good way
    VictimX_27: I think eminem is hot!
    cheesedog: Oh. You think I'm hot?
    VictimX_27: Yeah
    cheesedog: What do you look like?
    cheesedog: Do you have a pic?
    VictimX_27: I don't show my picture to anyone
    cheesedog: Why not?
    VictimX_27: Cause I'm ugly
    cheesedog: I won't make fun of you
    VictimX_27: Its not that. I just don't like my looks
    cheesedog: So you have no self-esteem, huh?
    cheesedog: Is that what you're saying?
    VictimX_27: I just don't think I'm pretty
    cheesedog: Let me be the judge of that.
    VictimX_27: Nahhh
    cheesedog: Then describe yourself.
    VictimX_27: Why do u wanna know what I look like?
    cheesedog: Because I think you're nice
    cheesedog: I want to picture you in my head while I'm talking to you.
    VictimX_27: LMAO!! You don't want 2 picture me. Trust me
    cheesedog: Why not?
    VictimX_27: I told you. I'm ugly.
    cheesedog: Well... I think you're beautiful on the inside.
    VictimX_27: You don't even know me
    cheesedog: I'm a pretty good judge of character
    VictimX_27: Then why do u need 2 see me?
    cheesedog: I just wanted to know thats all
    cheesedog: If you aren't comfortable with it... thats fine.
    VictimX_27: You don't understand
    cheesedog: Is it that bad?
    VictimX_27: YESSSSS
    cheesedog: Ok then. I'm gonna picture you as Weezy from the Jeffersons .
    cheesedog: She is the bomb!
    cheesedog: She makes me hot just thinking about her!
    VictimX_27: Wheezy?
    cheesedog: Yep. Weezy.
    VictimX_27: Who is that?
    cheesedog: George's wife.
    VictimX_27: Who is george
    cheesedog: George Jefferson. From the Jeffersons .
    cheesedog: Are you fucking deaf?
    VictimX_27: Who are the Jeffersons ?
    cheesedog: Oh lord. Here we go
    VictimX_27: wut?
    cheesedog: You don't know who the Jeffersons are?
    VictimX_27: Should I?
    cheesedog: Yes.
    VictimX_27: Well I don't.
    cheesedog: FISH DONT FRY IN THE KITCHEN! BEANS DONT BURN ON THE GREEEELL...
    VictimX_27: huhhh?
    cheesedog: TOOK A WHOOOOLE LOTTA LU UH VINNNN. JUST TO GET UP THAT HEEEELL
    VictimX_27: Wut the hell are you saying?
    cheesedog: Hold on a second
    cheesedog: Here you go. *PIC*
    VictimX_27: Thats her?
    cheesedog: Yep
    VictimX_27: I don't look anything like that
    cheesedog: SHUT UP! You're ruining my fantasy!
    VictimX_27: LOL. You're funny.
    cheesedog: What's funny?
    VictimX_27: u r
    cheesedog: I'm glad I entertain you
    VictimX_27: me 2
    cheesedog: So if you don't look like Weezy, what do you look like?
    VictimX_27: u don't give up do u?
    cheesedog: Never
    VictimX_27: I'm the exact opposite of her
    cheesedog: ???
    VictimX_27: I'm very white
    cheesedog: Thats cool, my white anti-soul sista'
    VictimX_27: LOL
    cheesedog: I can dig white chicks too, I guess.
    VictimX_27: I'm whiter than most
    cheesedog: really?
    VictimX_27: I'm an albino
    cheesedog: a what?
    VictimX_27: u don't know what that is?
    cheesedog: I've heard the word before
    VictimX_27: I have no pigment in my skin, eyes or hair
    VictimX_27: So I'm all white
    cheesedog: This is bullshit
    VictimX_27: I'm serious!
    VictimX_27: You've never seen an albino before?
    cheesedog: No. Where do they live? Albinia?
    VictimX_27: No, we live all over.
    cheesedog: Then how come I've never seen any
    VictimX_27: Lucky I suppose
    cheesedog: Send me your picture. I wanna know what an albino looks like.
    VictimX_27: I'll send you a picture of one but not me
    cheesedog: Ok
    VictimX_27: Here u go *PIC*
    cheesedog: Whoa. Thats freaky
    VictimX_27: See why I don't send my picture out?
    cheesedog: there's nothing wrong with it.
    cheesedog: It doesn't make you ugly
    cheesedog: This chick is kind of hot actually.
    VictimX_27: Thank u
    cheesedog: No problem
    cheesedog: Her, not you. I don't know what you look like.
    VictimX_27: Are you gonna be on in 3 hours?
    cheesedog: Yes
    VictimX_27: I have to go to the mall with my sister
    VictimX_27: Will you be here when I get back?
    cheesedog: S ure. Then I'll sex you up.
    VictimX_27: Gee thanks. LOL
    cheesedog: I'm serious
    VictimX_27: We'll see.
    cheesedog: Yes we will.
    VictimX_27: Bye for now!
    cheesedog: Make sure you wear some sunscreen.
    VictimX_27: <USER HAS LOGGED OUT>

    About 3 hours later...

    VictimX_27: HEY!
    cheesedog: Hello there
    VictimX_27: I'm back
    cheesedog: Have fun at the mall?
    VictimX_27: Yeah. I got some new shoes
    cheesedog: Interesting
    VictimX_27: Not really. Just shoes
    cheesedog: You ready to be sexed up now?
    VictimX_27: LOL
    cheesedog: Is that a yes?
    VictimX_27: Could be
    VictimX_27:
    cheesedog: HOT DAMN!
    cheesedog: I gently suck your nipples
    cheesedog: I feel them get hard then I jam my hand down your..
    VictimX_27: WOAH! Slow down cowboy
    cheesedog: Why?
    VictimX_27: I'm not just gonna cyber with you if thats all you want
    cheesedog: What do you mean?
    VictimX_27: You're not going to ignore me later are you?
    cheesedog: Of course not.
    cheesedog: I like you.
    VictimX_27: I don't even know how old you are.
    cheesedog: I'm 27. Now....
    cheesedog: I gently massage your breasts with my rough hands
    cheesedog: I roll your nipples between my fingers
    VictimX_27: WAIT!
    cheesedog: They get hard again... what?
    VictimX_27: Don't you wanna know anything about me first?
    VictimX_27: Like what I like?
    cheesedog: Oh yeah. Sure. Hurry up.
    VictimX_27: That didn't sound convincing.
    cheesedog: YES I WANNA KNOW WHAT YOU LIKE RIGHT NOW!!!
    VictimX_27: Now u r being a smartass
    VictimX_27: Just give me a minute
    cheesedog: ok
    VictimX_27: I'm back
    cheesedog: np
    VictimX_27: thank you
    cheesedog: So what do you like?
    VictimX_27: Ummmm being licked
    cheesedog: Where?
    VictimX_27: Everywhere
    cheesedog: Any place in particular?
    VictimX_27: uhhh yeah
    cheesedog: tell me
    VictimX_27: on my clit
    cheesedog: OK!
    cheesedog: NOW YOU'RE TALKIN!
    VictimX_27: I also like being done from behind
    cheesedog: Ooooooohhhh.
    cheesedog: Ok. Check this out.
    cheesedog: We're in an abandoned building.
    cheesedog: No is around. Its all quiet.
    VictimX_27: Uh huh
    cheesedog: I gently unbutton your pants and slide my hand across your clit
    cheesedog: You get all warm and juicy.
    cheesedog: I slip your panties down and continue to massage your pussy
    VictimX_27: oooohh mmmm
    cheesedog: I place my mouth on your pussy as I eat you from behind
    cheesedog: I wiggle my tounge around across your moist hole
    VictimX_27: yessss
    cheesedog: I cover your ears with my hands as I eat you.
    cheesedog: Egon and Ray sneak in from the back.
    cheesedog: *Powering up Proton packs*
    VictimX_27: ???
    cheesedog: Then... Egon BLASTS your pasty white ass!!
    cheesedog: POW!! BZZZZZTTTTTPHTTTTTT!!!
    cheesedog: Winston and Peter set up the containment trap....
    VictimX_27: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT!!!
    cheesedog: You wiggle around in the proton streams buck naked
    cheesedog: The streams almost cross! Look out!!
    cheesedog: Peter smacks you across the chin with his gun
    cheesedog: They open the trap and it sucks your pale ass in!
    VictimX_27: This isn't funny johnny!
    cheesedog: SHUT UP! YOUR CAUGHT!
    cheesedog: **puts you in the containment area**
    cheesedog: Slimer is in there too..
    VictimX_27: YOU ARE A FUCKING ASSHOLE!
    cheesedog: I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP!
    cheesedog: Now...Slimer sticks his green, slimey cock in your pigmentless ass.
    cheesedog: **HE SLIMES YOU!**
    VictimX_27: Never talk to me again!
    cheesedog: He cums all over your hair... but no one notices cause its the same color
    VictimX_27: FUCK YOUUUU
    cheesedog: He eats a powdered donut!
    VictimX_27: SHUT UP AND FUCK YOUUUU!!!!!
    cheesedog: o wait! It was your hand, you scary, white whore!
    VictimX_27: LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
    cheesedog: Chill out, Casper . You're trapped, I said.
    cheesedog: Slimer goes to lick your clit.
    cheesedog: But there is already slime on your it!!
    cheesedog: Slimer thinks you are a cheater and gets jealous!!
    cheesedog: HE RIPS YOUR WHITE TITS OFF!
    VictimX_27: FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!
    cheesedog: **Plays volleyball with them**
    VictimX_27: <USER HAS LOGGED OUT>

  15. #35

    WTF? That was just weird XD

  16. #36

    nah

    that was funny as hell

  17. #37
    Bagel
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    1,475
    BG Level
    6
    FFXI Server
    Bahamut
    WoW Realm
    Drenden

    Hey, I'm running out of copy/paste material

    Lemme look for a better version, because I agree - twas weak.

    However, I have Fiftysplit in Private messages about to prove his, er, her self by way of picture. Whatever, it's free porn, right? Will post that too.

    EDIT:

    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v4...rophet/man.jpg

  18. #38

    hehe

    so many posters on this and we got clearly off the topic

  19. #39
    Babyorphan
    Guest

    Now to terrorize Jersey and Fifty
    Maaybe not.. got better things to do.
    Like eat some old cereal with sour milk.

  20. #40

    This topic got from dumb to dumberer. Still, Bloodninja fucking owns.

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