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  1. #1
    The God Damn Kuno
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    Your state fails

    This is kinda old, but I found this recently and Jesus Christ theres alot of funny/weird ass shit.

    http://www.dumblaws.com/


    NY:

    Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business.
    A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting.
    It is against the law to throw a ball at someone's head for fun.
    The penalty for jumping off a building is death.

    A man can't go outside while wearing a jacket and pants that do not match.
    Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk.
    Women may not wear high heels while in the city limits.
    During a concert, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk backwards on the sidewalks.


    How does your state fail? ;o

  2. #2
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    Texas Laws:

    -One must acknowledge a supreme being before being able to hold public office.
    -It is illegal to sell one�s eye.
    -A program has been created in the state that attempts to control the weather.
    -When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
    -It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
    -Up to a felony charge can be levied for promoting the use of, or owning more than six dildos.
    -It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.
    -It is illegal to milk another person's cow.
    -A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.
    -Homosexual behavior is a misdemeanor offense.
    -The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.

    Lubbock County:
    -It is illegal to drive within an arm's length of alcohol - including alcohol in someone else's blood stream.

  3. #3

    United Kingdom Laws

    No cows may be driven down the roadway between 10 AM and 7 PM unless there is prior approval from the Commissioner of Police.

    All land must be left to the eldest son.

    Divorces are outlawed.

    Since 1313, MPs are not allowed to don armor in Parliament.

    Those wishing to purchase a television must also buy a license.

    With the exception of carrots, most goods may not be sold on Sunday.

    All English males over the age 14 are to carry out 2 or so hours of longbow practice a week supervised by the local clergy.

    London Hackney Carriages (taxis/cabs) must carry a bale of hay and a sack of oats.

    It is illegal to be drunk on Licensed Premises (in a pub or bar).

    It is illegal for two adult men to have sex in the same house as a third person

    Any person found breaking a boiled egg at the sharp end will be sentenced to 24 hours in the village stocks (enacted by Edward VI).

    Chelsea Pensioners may not be impersonated.

    A bed may not be hung out of a window.

    It is illegal for a lady to eat chocolates on a public conveyance

    Any boy under the age of 10 may not see a naked manequin.

    It is illegal to leave baggage unattended.

    Explanation
    Many terrorists in the UK favor the practice of placing a bomb in a bag, then leaving the bag to explode later. Since this became a real threat, this law was passed to deter the crime and prosecute those who commit it.

    Picking up abandoned baggage is an act of terrorism.

    It is illegal for a Member of Parliament to enter the House of Commons wearing a full suit of armour.

    Destroying or defacing money is illegal.

    If a steam locomotive is driven on roads, a man must walk in front of the vehicle with a red flag during the day and a red lantern at night to warn passersby.

    All steam locomotives are limited to 4mph on roads.

    Anal sex is prohibited.

    You may not make out in public.

    It is legal for a male to urinate in public, as long it is on the rear wheel of his motor vehicle and his right hand is on the vehicle.

    Committing suicide is classified as a capital crime.

    Interfering with the mail or sleeping with the consort of the Queen is classed as treason, and as such, carries a maximum penalty of death.
    Placing a postage stamp that bears the Queen (or King) upside down is considered treason.

    You can only shoot a Welsh person with a bow and arrow inside the city walls and after midnight.

    You may not shoot a Welsh person on Sunday with a longbow in the Cathedral Close.

    It is illegal for a woman to be topless in public except as a clerk in a tropical fish store.

    Companies may vote in local elections.

    Excluding Sundays, it is perfectly legal to shoot a Scotsman with a bow and arrow.

    During his reign, Oliver Cromwell banned the eating of mince pies on Christmas day, as they were insufficiently Puritan.

    One may not "blemish the peace".

    A license is required to keep a lunatic.

    Damaging the grass is illegal.

    Under the reign of Elizabeth I, any person found guilty of "harboring a Catholic priest" would be tortured or even hanged.

    Jesuits, Seminary Priests and other suchlike disobedient Persons must be banished.

    You may not fish on Sundays for salmon.

    It is illegal to be a drunk in possession of a cow.

    Trespassing on someone else's land is legal.

    If someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your commode, you must let them enter

  4. #4
    Sea Torques
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    Quite a few of the UK one's they still enforce..........

  5. #5

    California High(Lowlights)

    No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.

    Various California City laws

    Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
    You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.
    Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine
    No one may annoy a lizard in a city park.
    It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time. (I'm sure that happens often)
    Drinking intoxicating cement is prohibited.
    It is a crime for dogs to mate within 500 yards of a church.
    All persons wishing to keep a rhinoceros as a pet must obtain a $100 license first.
    It is illegal to molest butterflies.
    Prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash.


    This one is the best, coming from San Fransisco

    Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.

    Are these seriously real?

  6. #6
    Salvage Bans
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    Boston MA -
    Duels to the death permitted on the common on Sundays provided that the Governor is present.

  7. #7
    Ridill
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    Quote Originally Posted by Posterboy
    California High(Lowlights)

    No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
    I believe this is known as the "Knight Rider Statue". It seems that K.I.T.T. went on one too many driver-less joyrides.

  8. #8
    Saint Daahan Von Quitter the 1st
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    Illinois:

    It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.

    It forbidden to eat in a place that is on fire.

    One may not pee in his neighbor's mouth.

    There is a $1,000 fine for beating rats with a baseball bat.

    It is against the law to make faces at dogs.

    It is illegal to give cigars or cigarettes to any domesticated animals.

    Just a few out of the many.

  9. #9
    Relic Horn
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    Carbuncle

    Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.
    details

    Incestuous marriages are legal.

    It is illegal to impersonate a person of the clergy.

    It is illegal to maim oneself to escape duty.

    You may not drive barefooted.

    Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.


    Certain acts prohibited on Sunday.

    It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.

    Putting salt on a railroad track may be punishable by death.

    Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.

    It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.

    You must have windshield wipers on your car.

    You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.

    Masks may not be worn in public.

    Women are able to retain all property they owned prior to marriage in the case of divorce. However, this provision does not apply to men.

    It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.

    It is illegal to bike, roller-skate, skateboard, or inline skate in a commercially zoned area.

    Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status, may face up to five years in jail. - Thats from Auburn (College Town).

  10. #10
    HABS SUCK!!!!!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elcura
    United Kingdom Laws
    Anal sex is prohibited.
    I guess Niro + Sept arent visiting the UK anytime soon...

  11. #11

    NY: (the ones Kuno didn't post)

    You may not smoke within 100 feet of the entrance to a public building. (I think they still enforce this one)

    It is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing "body hugging clothing.

    Citizens may not greet each other by "putting one's thumb to the nose and wiggling the fingers".

    New Yorkers cannot dissolve a marriage for irreconcilable differences, unless they both agree to it.

    A person may not walk around on Sundays with an ice cream cone in his/her pocket.

    While riding in an elevator, one must talk to no one, and fold his hands while looking toward the door.

    Slippers are not to be worn after 10:00 P.

    There's a few more that vary within certain City law too XD

  12. #12

    Might as well send everyone living in Tennessee to prison ~

    Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law.
    Males may not be sexually aroused in public.

    FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK!!!!!! !!

  13. #13
    The God Damn Kuno
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    I only posted the ones I thought were funny. ;x

  14. #14
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    Speaking of Tennessee, here's one from Memphis:
    Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.

  15. #15

    Quote Originally Posted by veyr
    Speaking of Tennessee, here's one from Memphis:
    Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
    When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming.

    You can't shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.

    God damn carriages wasting all my bullets I could be shooting whales with!!

  16. #16
    Salvage Bans
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    Here are some good ol' Canadian Laws eh?

    You may not pay for a fifty-cent item with only pennies.

    When raining, a person may not water his/her lawn.

    It is illegal to turn right on a red light at any time.
    (this is false, or a very old law)

    The city is classified as a no-pee zone.

    It's illegal to climb trees.

    Residents are not allowed to have an Internet connection faster than 56k.(not allowed to have more than 48V on a line)

    It is illegal to show public affection on Sunday

    It is illegal to kill a sick person by frightening them.



    note: I don't think all of these "Dumb Laws" are still in effect, just a collection of old laws"

  17. #17
    Ridill
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    Pennsylvania Laws

    It it illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors.

    Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue.

    A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling.

    You may not sing in the bathtub.

    Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him must pull well off the road, cover his car with a blanket or canvas that blends with the countryside, and let the horses pass.

    Ministers are forbidden from performing marriages when either the bride or groom is drunk. (It seems that half of the weddings I have attended are illegal.)

    Pittsburgh-

    No one is allowed to sleep on a refrigerator. (The state law that bans sleeping on refigerators outside didn't go far enough.)

    It is still illegal to bring a donkey or a mule onto a trolley car. (It happens more often than you would think.)

  18. #18
    Hayleystrator
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    I don't know if these are supposed to be true or anything, but I looked in the Canadian section and some of those are definitely NOT true.

  19. #19
    HABS SUCK!!!!!
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    actually the law about being illegal to turn right on a red light is still a violation in Quebec, which is a Canadian province (OMG WATS A PROVINCE LOL).

    But Quebec has the worst fuckin drivers I've ever seen. Only in Quebec will a driver accelerate when seeing a pedestrian running across the street (except me, because no one fucks with me).

  20. #20

    Some parts in states you can't turn Right-on-Red, but it's usually denoted by a sign, whereas otherwise it's permitted usually. I'm assuming, of course, the law's intentions were banning it completely as a whole d('-')

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