Who's your servers' Lance?

[Asswipe]

Phoenix:

- Wrish, who quit a year and a half ago but still logs on all the major forums daily to argue endlessly about literally everything. I never saw someone type the dumbest shit with near academic level prose until Wrish came along.

- Deicide, a moronic gil buying monk. He would brag about everything while doing some of the most moronic things possible. No skill, couldn't play the job as anything more than auto-attack and use asuran fists at 100 TP (which he did to stuff like Suzaku, Seiryu, Fafnir, and every other thing the poor bastards that recruited him would let him fight). Perpetual liar about where he got all his gil ("I buy stuff from people and sell it to other people for more money"). Would ask people if they had stuff like ridill, adaman hauberk, black belt, and such just to scoff at them if they say no (even though the only exclusive item he had was melee hose for a long time and would even list it in his search comment for merit parties). Sometimes, he'd check people he invited, say their gear is (|Too weak|), and kick them. Was one of those people with over a hundred merits but only 2 experience keeping him at 75. He joined one of the gilseller groups and managed to steal Byakko's haidate from them after spending a couple weeks. Just before he vanished, he started trying to buy currency for hand-to-hand relic, with everyone betting that he'd get to stage three in a couple weeks and then have to beg from all the Dynamis linkshells to get him the exclusive items.

Perhaps much of this seem mundane, but Deicide not only did everything wrong, he did it with such conviction that nearly everyone knew him as a moron and had a story about some noobish thing he did.

[Vinen]

You forgot to add a few starter people...let me get you off on the right foot.


Gilgamesh: Sirlancelot (Aegis PLD quoted as saying "relics suck"...he wasnt joking when he said it, WyrMazurkaLegs founder)
Fairy: Chiz (see my sig, complete egoistical complexion which religiously forbids him from ever being wrong)
Titan: Map (Ninurtas Sash, Relic GKT.....Warrior SJ LV32)




I think Map's on titan.

Yeah, Map's on Titan. Hes in my Linkshell.

Iono I'd personally say Irenicusg for Titan.

Gets FULL ARMADA [sides that he had HQ whatever the best/near best possible item was in every slot... minus Relic] then gets busted for Pos-Hacking, etc, etc, etc and his account is banned during the first Major 3rd party bannings. He thought he was the greatest thing since sliced bread.

[Isildur]

*edit: his current character name is Oromis, and he claimed to have migrated to Asura lol

Unfortunately Im sure hell fit right in.

lol oops meant "from"

[Eaglestrike]

Shiva's Lance migrated to Midgard I can't think of who it would be now.

[Intense]

*edit: his current character name is Oromis, and he claimed to have migrated to Asura lol

Unfortunately Im sure hell fit right in.

lol oops meant "from"

Oh, then muahahahaha Asura strikes again!!

[Epincus]

- Deicide, a moronic gil buying monk. (Standard Deicide Story)

I'm surprised it took this long for someone to speak up about him, I woulda but I didn't know if he was still around.

My highlights with the guy - He once begged me multiple times to join my xp party (solo lv.73-74 BST at the time) so he could show off his leet monk skills against other flamingos. When I told him no, he started killing my released pets.

Also - Regularly seeing him /shouting in Whitegate before I quit seeking to buy things worth a considerable amount of money at the time. Examples included Osode, KClub, SpeedBelt, Strider Boots (Hell if I know why he wanted those for his monk).

[Xaru]

Thetruepandagod sylph-
Has 75 war 75 blm thinks Weskit +1 is better than utsusemi ni(He still doesnt have it ) even passed up haidate because he didnt want to buy ni

Well he may be right, considering BLM is better than NIN

But seriously for Sylph we have a lot of contenders, Playaplaya/Airshort/Alicevirgin are high on the list (does it count if they were banned?)

[Medivac]

bahumut-birdhair

everyone gives him alot of shit. i tried to help him out by tellin to lvl his subs etc w/e he's lvl 70'ish with /war sub...lol if a pty is pissin me off i always get him to replace me. (he doesnt have refresh)

[Meat]

Asura= melchor? swore that plds should only use estaff after shield update\war is the only pld sub

[Beckwin]

Remora: Kyron sold 4k USD worth in gil and pulls in full black armor

My LS sold him an Algol for 20m (we had like 9 of them and no one else wanted one enough to spend points).

The kicker: we had sold a couple algols before his for 2.5m.

Also the guy gave someone who ran a Sea LS a KC in exchange for helping him complete Sea and get a Homam body, or something along those lines.

[Gatsby]

For Titan..

In terms of posting stupidity, its a toss up between Idd and Arkhan.
Many people have read arkhan's rants on the NIN and WAR forums. They really were something strange.

Idd is probably not as well known throughout the non-titaners but his posts (I can't even read them) make me want to dig my eyes out with a toothpick. He comments on nearly every damn KI Titan post. For those of you who want to read aolspeak for pages, I'd recommend (sadly) to read this posts.

[threevo]

aw nynja we got ryu now, i did feel kinda bad he/she waited with full currency for relic forever because his/her tooweak dynamis shell couldnt get ra/ex =(

[Toth]

Fairy actually has a trio of astonishing noobness besides Chiz:

Poof - need I say more? oh and she looks like Keanu Reeves

Kinesis - egotistical BLM who threatens people and forums with an internet mafia if you piss him off (thread was in Ryko's sig)

Thunderblaze - banned from KI by a poll and shouts constantly in whitegate about his daily woes.

[cassiraa]

Roundhouse for Unicorn, In a heartbeat.


He's every bit as bad if not worse.

[Eaglestrike]

aw nynja we got ryu now, i did feel kinda bad he/she waited with full currency for relic forever because his/her tooweak dynamis shell couldnt get ra/ex =(

She's a lesbian irl. Does she still pull all Dynamis runs as PLD?

[Elesirdur]

I don't think Birdhair counts for this contest because Birdhair's a straight-up n00b. He doesn't have any great gear or lead a LS or anything, whereas this Lance character's got pretty much all the stuff for Paladin end-game wise and doesn't is an even bigger nub because of it.

I can't really think of anyone on Bahamut who's really well geared and/or rich but still just fails at FFXI. I know they're out there, and probably in AV or Kazoku or something, but no names are coming to my mind.

[Dezzimal]

Roundhouse for Unicorn, In a heartbeat.


He's every bit as bad if not worse.

The answer for unicorn's lance is so obviously roundhouse that it bores me. Who is unicorn's second lance? Vote Now:

A. Greysoul
B. Dariusd
C. Liareturns
D. Deacon
E. Brackis
F. Keiny
G. Quanset
H. Deviant

[Damane]

F. Keiny

I can see the lost dalmatica +1 and D.ring still hurts you, /comfort Dezzimal.
I would vote for deacon, but since I dont play anymore FFXI since new year its kind of pointless.

[Sixtail]

Well Lance most of these people have posted here, so there lack of proper brain power can be seen. But some of these other people..Decide, etc, their must be links to posts that fully explore how retarded they are.

Lakshmi's pretty damn quiet. But i'll list a few.

Me-The server's sleepest Summoner, has a bad habit of passing out in exp parties, or worse, Dynamis and then autorunning right into a group of mobs. I don't know what it is, but capped evasion on SMN just due to the fact that I can be sitting there one second and wake up two hours in Whitegate/Jueno and have no idea wft happened. Blood tests have shown me nill and i'm not that heavy (210). I'm also a member of the server's most infamous elitests and a pervert for the ages (I've gotten better). Had the date AND time that I scored my last bit of relic for SMN in my bazzar tag for six months, making me first NA on server and pissing off a number of people from what I hear. One little Taru SMN got very butt-hurt over it and it seems his ass still hurts him almost a year later as he never fails to check and /slap me or mock other members of my LS for having me. Noted as a shitty SMN among shitty SMN's. Name withheld because not enough lulz would result from it.

Mokuka-Loves him some RMT's. Had the honor along with Demonhunter and various other level 75 people of taking eight of the server's oldest and most infamous RMT into their NA/EU/CGF LS. Helped RMT score their first Kirin kill and defended his RMT infested shell by saying "Those aren't RMT's, they speak broken english/Their gear is too good." When faced with a number of old school 75's pointing out he's wrong, his defence was "Fuck you all." A month later, had to eat humble pie as his Dynamis shell kicked him to the curb for his RMT loving and confessed that his shell had now 'kicked' all the RMT. Yet said RMT were spotted for weeks afterwards wearing their pearls to the LS.

Noreen-A prime show of what being a vagina-deprived nerd in the US Navy aboard a aircraft carrier for too long can do with you. Everyone thought it was a girl to the point that REAL girls defended her when his/her sex came into question. Got in-game married, likely cybersexing and various other shit. Ended up exposed, massive drama for the ages, though we forgave him/her. Ended up regreating it as said person turned into a guy on PMS, caused more drama, left, founded still-born LS and ended up with ex LS leader's account that at the time had the only NA Defending Ring on it. Last seen..still RPing as a girl character. Known for taru-petting/fondling and other 'kawai' scary crap that only pre-teen girls engage in.


That's about it.

[Akiyama]

Roundhouse for Unicorn, In a heartbeat.


He's every bit as bad if not worse.

The answer for unicorn's lance is so obviously roundhouse that it bores me. Who is unicorn's second lance? Vote Now:

A. Greysoul
B. Dariusd
C. Liareturns
D. Deacon
E. Brackis
F. Keiny
G. Quanset
H. Deviant

F. I've heard lots of bad rumors. >.>