Originally Posted by
My ass
Two men are trying to decide what to do with their afternoon. One man proposes they watch TV or take a walk. The other suggests they go break into a home. One man points out that they may be injured in the process, and asks if its worth their lives to commit robbery today. They deliberate and eventually agree that they are willing to risk their lives to deprive others of their property, and they take off to look for a home to break into.
Along the way, the two men come across a house.
"Do you know who lives here?" one man inquires.
"No, I do not. Perhaps there may be items of value inside?" the other responds.
Together, they stealthily approach the window so as not to alarm whoever might be home. Quickly, they break the window and leap inside, ready to confront the homeowner and incapacitate him. But they are lucky, he is not home. Elated with their luck, they begin searching for anything worth taking.
Pocketing a sentimental heirloom, one man turns and asks "Worthington, have you found anything of which to deprive this poor homeowner?"
To which Worthington responds, "Yes, Buckley. It will wound his soul to find these missing. They are one of a kind, and cannot be replaced."
"Excellent, we must be going then. It is almost time for tea."
"Indeed, my good chap."
As the two men exit the house, the neighbor catches a glimpse of the two escaping thieves. He dashes outside as the felonious criminals are stepping out of the yard. "STOP!" he yells.
"Time to make haste, Worthington!"
"I verily agree!"
The two criminals begin running, arms full of loot, as the neighbor gives chase. Two, three, four blocks they run. Soon, the thieves are short of breath and begin to slow down. They slow down just enough that the neighbor can close in and get off a shot, killing Worthington.
"Oh well, we knew the risks," Buckley admits, accepting of his fate. He collapses to the floor as the next shot takes his head clean off. They would not get away with robbery this day.