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  1. #1
    St. Fiat
    THE TIME FOR QUESTIONS
    HAS PASSED

    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    3,808
    BG Level
    7

    We Report, You Decide - 10.01.08 Alleya

    These are exciting times in Vana'diel. Things are changing more rapidly than they ever have in the past. The systems of old are being challenged by the new. Nowhere is this more obvious than in the case of relic weapons. For years dynamis relics have dominated the world stage, but now new mythic weapons are coming in with a message of change. They want to do things differently, and they present a serious challenge to incumbents and previous BG contributors like Aegis. To allow relic weapons to present their case to the players, I recently sat down with Aegis' running mate in this new campaign for player's gil, Claustrum, for an extensive interview.



    ALLEYA: Claustrum, thank you for speaking with us today.



    CLAUSTRUM: You're very welcome, Alleya. Altana bless BG and Altana bless Vana'diel.



    ALLEYA: Yes. So let's get right into it. There's been a lot of controversy over you, Claustrum. Some don't feel that you're the right person to represent relic weapons. They cite that you are rarely upgraded and that the nature of your position, being a mage weapon, makes you inexperienced in combat. How do you respond to that?



    CLAUSTRUM: You can't blink. You just can't blink. When Aegis asked me to be his running mate, I didn't blink. I thought, of course!



    ALLEYA: You didn't pause to consider what being a relic might entail? Standards you might be expected to live up to when a player invests so much in you?



    CLASTRUM: You can't do things like that. You can't second guess your relic. The beastmen are coming and they want to kill us, so you can't hesitate or they will get you. They come for you in your sleep and steal your fortifications.



    ALLEYA: What makes you qualified to lead the players on a path of victory in vana'diel?



    CLASTRUM: I'm from Xarcabard. I can see Castle Zvhal from my house! Xarcabard shares a very thin border with the Shadow Lord. We have to keep our eye on Castle Zvhal. This makes me very experienced.



    ALLEYA: Clastrum, the shadow lord was defeated many years ago by adventurers.



    CLAUSTRUM: The Shadow Lord thinks otherwise. We have to keep an eye on him, he doesn't care about the players. He just wants to send beastmen after us.



    ALLEYA: But he's dead.



    CLAUSTRUM: That's just what he wants you to think.



    ALLEYA: One promise mythic weapons have made is giving mutli-attack weapons to every job. How do you respond to that?



    CLAUSTRUM: Listen, if everyone got mutli-attack weapons that would just be wrong. Everyone knows Altana gave mutli-attack weapons to warriors, and no one else should be getting them! These are the kinds of sick values mythic weapons want to bring into our homes. You know who else was in favor of mutli-attack weapons? The Shadow Lord.



    ALLEYA: Moving on, the economy. Many have said that in comparison to mythic weapons, relics are just too expensive and only accessible to the rich. How do you respond to that?



    CLAUSTRUM: Well these people, they need to farm more. If they just farmed more they wouldn't be so poor and they could afford relics. It's not Square's job to interfere uh...with uh...and you know it's about jobs too. You have to have the right jobs, and you have to have the money to level those jobs uh...so the Shadow Lord won't be able to get you as easily. Because it's all our responsibility to stop the Shadow Lord with...jobs...and you know the mythic weapons, they don't have a plan for the fortifications they steal, the beastmen and their jobs.



    ALLEYA: Yes...Well, let me ask you, can you provide a specific example of an instance where Aegis has broken the traditional mold that you speak of? What innovations has he made?



    CLAUSTRUM: Aegis cares. He cares about players. And their jobs, so the Shadow Lord can't take them and the fortifications.



    ALLEYA: Yes, but what is a specific example?



    CLAUSTRUM: We must not allow the beastmen to taint our bodily fluids.



    ALLEYA: Claustrum, thank you for talking with us today.



    CLAUSTRUM: I can see Castle Zvhal from my house! Jobs.

    Now on to things we've done this month!





    Dynamis!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/dynablaarrrgghh.jpg
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/dynavalk3mr7.jpg
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/dynavalk4kd1.jpg

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/dynaxarc32ps8.jpg
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/dynaxarc34xo6.jpg

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/DySandoria2.jpg


    Sea!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/joh2kj5.jpg
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/jop41oi9.jpg

    Odin! I think.
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/odinchigoe.png



    Stronghold Invasions!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/...0Beadeaux1.jpg

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/...0Beadeaux3.jpg
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/...0Beadeaux5.jpg


    Ultima!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/ultima31fr4.jpg
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/ultima41eg4.jpg

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/ultima52zz9.jpg







    Congrats Aeri on Duelist's Chapeau!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/aeri1.jpg


    Congrats to Atumreseptimus on Cleric's Mitts, Mirage Keffiyeh, Enkidu's Harness, and Alkalurops!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/atumreseptimus1.jpg


    Congrats to Ceiyne on Melee Hose, Monster Gloves, Saotome Kabuto, Abyss Burgeonet, Sorcerers Petasos, Warriors Lorica, Pantin Babouches, Pantin Taj, and Pantin Taj -1!

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/cei1.png

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/cei2.png


    Congrats to Drewbixcube on Monster Gloves, Commodore Tricorne, Saotome Kabuto -1,Gnadbhods Helm, and Skystrider

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/drewbixcube1.jpg


    Congrats to Epical on Nashira Gages and Saotome Koshi-ate!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/epical1.jpg


    Congrats to Gizhoesan on Koenig Cuirass, Mirage Keffiyeh, Fenian Ring, and ZhaGos Barbut!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/gizmosan1.jpg


    Congrats to Marius on Nashira Gages, Nashira Turban, and Assassin's Armlets!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/marius1.jpg


    Congrats to Nikkei on Valor Surcoat, and Cleric's Mitts!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/nikkei1.jpg


    Congratulations to Nickolias on on Shadow Breastplate, and Duelist's Chapeau. Despite his best efforts, technical difficulties prevented his picturing here! D:


    Congratulations to Nirokun on Mirage Bazubands!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/niro1.jpg


    Congratulations to Ryphen on Valor Surcoat, Sorcerer's Petasos, and Nashira Crackows!

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/ryph1.jpg

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/ryph2.jpg


    Congratulations to Shiznicle on Commodore Tricorne and Wyrm Armet!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/shiz1.jpg


    Congratulations to Sonomaa on Commodore Tricorne, Melee Crown, and Crimson Mask!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/sono1.jpg

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/sono2.jpg


    Congratulations to Tearshang on Scout's Jerkin and Valor Surcoat!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/tear1.png

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/tear2.png


    Congratulations to Toecutter on Homam Zucchetto, Melee Hose, Warrior's Lorica, Adaman Hauberk, Koga Sarashi, and Shadow Cuishes!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/toecutter1.jpg


    Congratulations to Tsukasaz on Summoner's Horn and some piece of crap we got from Sandworm like 3 months ago but nobody wanted until now!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/tsukasaz1.jpg


    Congratulations to Xavier on Valhalla Helm!
    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/xavier1.jpg




    And who field dressed enough Moose to become Lootwhore this month?



    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/lootwhore.gif




    Kazen!

    Congrats on Abyss Burgeonet, Duelist's Chapeau, Temperance Torque, Koga Tekko, Valhalla Breastplate, and Terror Shield!

    http://www.bluegartr.com/img/100108/kazen2.jpg

  2. #2
    St. Fiat
    THE TIME FOR QUESTIONS
    HAS PASSED

    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    3,808
    BG Level
    7

    Bumping because I ninja'd myself.

  3. #3

    Haha. Very nice update. Love the reference.

  4. #4
    Nidhogg
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
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    3,512
    BG Level
    7
    FFXI Server
    Odin
    WoW Realm
    Lightbringer

    Fair and Balanced <Cover>.

  5. #5
    Ridill
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    12,469
    BG Level
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    FFXIV Character
    Septimus Atumre
    FFXIV Server
    Gilgamesh
    FFXI Server
    Bahamut

    Holy crap, that was the most delicious political satire targeted towards nerds ever. Bravo good sir, bravo.

  6. #6
    The Once and Future Wamoura
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
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    18,373
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    Rocl Montaigne
    FFXIV Server
    Excalibur
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    Bahamut
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    Quel'Thalas

    Claustrum would not run with Aegis. Aegis is too much of a maverick with a record to prove it.

  7. #7
    Hayleystrator
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Posts
    7,622
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    Bahamut

    Rocl's picture of Odin's horse's hind legs makes this update, imo.

  8. #8
    Nikkei's Hoe
    Worse than her at uno

    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    6,235
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    FFXIV Character
    Eanae Hikari
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    Gilgamesh
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    Hyjal

    http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y95...929_230225.jpg

    Nikkei and Eanae: Best twins, or best twins EVAR.

    <3 Nikkei

  9. #9
    The Veriest Berriest
    Pretty Pretty Princess

    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Posts
    1,896
    BG Level
    6
    FFXI Server
    Bahamut

    Quote Originally Posted by Eanae View Post
    http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y95...929_230225.jpg

    Nikkei and Eanae: Best twins, or best twins EVAR.

    <3 Nikkei
    (*'-')/\('-'*)

  10. #10
    DEUS VULT
    FITE ME

    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    10,762
    BG Level
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    Blog Entries
    4

    Fucking brilliant!

  11. #11
    Canada
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    1,483
    BG Level
    6
    FFXIV Character
    Mlle Skjie
    FFXIV Server
    Hyperion
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    Sylph
    WoW Realm
    Madoran

    Mein Gutler, I CAN WALK AGAIN!

  12. #12
    Bagel
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
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    1,390
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    6
    FFXIV Character
    Ellatrix Reatori
    FFXIV Server
    Sargatanas
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    Fenrir

    Your Bres picture is lackluster. Needs more footwork.

  13. #13
    Champion of the House of Weave
    Sweaty Dick Punching Enthusiast

    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    Sylph

    First picture with the hippo is win.

  14. #14
    Ridill
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
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    12,469
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    9
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    Septimus Atumre
    FFXIV Server
    Gilgamesh
    FFXI Server
    Bahamut

    Quote Originally Posted by Dammerung View Post
    Your Bres picture is lackluster. Needs more footwork.
    It did a lot of footwork when it used Hundredfists, but I was a little too busy trying to stay alive to take pictures.

  15. #15
    Lampoon
    Guest

    Someone shop a wig on Claustrum!

  16. #16
    Sponsored by Orton
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    4,518
    BG Level
    7
    FFXI Server
    Valefor

    I am Stiker and I approve this messasge.

    Pure. Win.

  17. #17
    Relic Weapons
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    380
    BG Level
    4
    FFXI Server
    Odin

    I just choked on bacon because of that first hipogryph pic.

    Good news piece :]

  18. #18
    Chram
    Join Date
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    Avelle Asteria
    FFXIV Server
    Hyperion
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    Phoenix
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    Alleria

    Great updated and I also busted out laughing at the hippo picture.

  19. #19
    Dice and rum
    Not necessarily in that order

    Join Date
    May 2006
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    Odin

    Oh god, this is great. *rolls* :D

  20. #20
    Absolute Messenger of Promathia
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
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    Blaise Destin
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    Sargatanas
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    Asura

    Quote Originally Posted by Tradition View Post
    I just choked on bacon because of that first hipogryph pic.

    Good news piece :]
    Seconded, i could not stop laughing

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