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  1. #1
    Relic Shield
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    How to ruin a monitor?

    Long story short, my company is cheap as hell and won't replace my 11 inch CRT monitor. It's blurry as hell.

    It's awful.

    However, if something was to happen with it, I'd get a 15 inch flat screen.

    I co-worker suggested I spill coffee on it... another chucked a padlock at it, which I deflected (too obvious).

    I spent a good hour using some pretty strong magnets to fuck up the picture, then called IT saying it was unusable. The IT guy came and hit degauss. Fixed it. I wanted to cry.

    I really thinks he hates me.

    How can I sabotage this piece of shit without making it obvious, and still leaving some function to it (so I can still get important shit done while I wait for it to be replaced)?

  2. #2
    IMPERIAL CONCUBINE OF ME
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    I lol'd at the tech guy hitting degauss.

  3. #3
    Relic Horn
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    11inch.. what the fuck

  4. #4
    Relic Shield
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seanr View Post
    11inch.. what the fuck
    mid-90s throwback... at least...

  5. #5

    tear the voltage pin off the plug and say the cleaning staff yanked the cable while they were cleaning? apply torque around the vga cable until you shear some of the signal lines? clip some of the pins at the end of the vga cable? pry off the front bezel and disconnect the power switch making it impossible to turn on? i work in IT and you'd be surprised the lengths people go to get new equipment and the lengths management will go to prevent them.

  6. #6
    A. Body
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    Ask management instead of IT? Cite health or productivity reasons.

    That, or have someone higher up the food chain that has a nicer monitor get a new one, and hand their down to you.

    IT usually isn't keen on handing out new stuff due to budgetary constraints and the typical "now everyone else wants one" case. The latter is why we don't put dual monitors on people's desks, for example.
    You also tend to get the mentality in IT, since it's usually a good thing, that you're there to prevent things from needing to be replaced.

    There's really little reason not to now though, I mean, you can get a decent monitor for barely over $100.

  7. #7

    Quote Originally Posted by Isiolia View Post
    Ask management instead of IT? Cite health or productivity reasons..
    This, several times over, if your supervisor is convinced you'll work better if they replace it (since it's a piece of shit anyway, even if it IS functional right now) your chances of getting a new one will increase substantially

  8. #8
    Ridill
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    Quote Originally Posted by Siniroth View Post
    This, several times over, if your supervisor is convinced you'll work better if they replace it (since it's a piece of shit anyway, even if it IS functional right now) your chances of getting a new one will increase substantially
    Or they'll replace him with someone who can work productively with a shitty monitor. In this economy, I bet they could find someone who'd be willing to take his place.

  9. #9

    Those are the ones with the glass screen that are huge? Pour a small amount of water along the edges of the screen so it drops back behind the plastic and see if that will short it. You could always just blow out the outlet taking the monitor with it too if there's no surge protector lol.

  10. #10
    Cerberus
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    Quote Originally Posted by Isiolia View Post
    Ask management instead of IT? Cite health or productivity reasons.

    That, or have someone higher up the food chain that has a nicer monitor get a new one, and hand their down to you.

    IT usually isn't keen on handing out new stuff due to budgetary constraints and the typical "now everyone else wants one" case. The latter is why we don't put dual monitors on people's desks, for example.
    You also tend to get the mentality in IT, since it's usually a good thing, that you're there to prevent things from needing to be replaced.

    There's really little reason not to now though, I mean, you can get a decent monitor for barely over $100.
    This, if it is really blurry tell your boss that your eyes are hurting from looking at the blurry screen all day. If that doesn't work, rearrange your office space and "accidently" drop your monitor.

  11. #11
    Puppetmaster
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    Can't you just jab something long and thin into the vents up top and hope you cut something important?

  12. #12
    IMPERIAL CONCUBINE OF ME
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    Yeah make sure it's metal and it's plugged in and on.

  13. #13

    Quote Originally Posted by Khamsin View Post
    Or they'll replace him with someone who can work productively with a shitty monitor. In this economy, I bet they could find someone who'd be willing to take his place.
    When did I say he had to put forth the idea that he couldn't work with the current monitor? The idea is to put forth the idea that you can still work with it, but you'd work this much better with a new monitor that isn't a piece of shit, ever trying to convince management you can't work productively with what you have (unless it's something that has nothing to do with you, if you space key doesn't work obviously hiring someone else won't solve that problem*) is just asking to get fired



    *: though copy and paste functions ARE all sorts of awesome

  14. #14

    11" CRT is funny.

  15. #15
    Change this later.
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    Try covering all the vents with tape until it overheats. Remove the tape before reporting it, obviously.

  16. #16
    Cerberus
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    start a fight club, make your office one of Project Mayhem's places to destroy.

  17. #17
    Salvage Bans
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    "Trip" over the wire and have it fall to it's 11 inch doom?

    Edit: Just make sure you have a witness or someone who will back you up that you tripped over the wire.

  18. #18
    Relic Shield
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    The vent thing sounds intriguing... it won't blow up or anything, will it?

    I love it when a bunch of people come together online in an effort to break stuff.

  19. #19
    RIDE ARMOR
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    Quote Originally Posted by Francisco View Post
    How can I sabotage this piece of shit without making it obvious, and still leaving some function to it (so I can still get important shit done while I wait for it to be replaced)?
    Everyone keeps ignoring this important caveat to his request.

  20. #20

    Yank on the cable, not to hard tho, just to short out (by luck) one of the color lines. Had a CRT line once with the red line snapped within, it was a pain to the eyes seeing everything in blue and green only... (But any 1 or 2 colors will work, as long it's not all 3 =P).

    When I say yank, I mean taking the part that goes in the computer and bending it, HARD, back and forward over and over again, plugging it back into your comp to see if one of the colors are destroyed.

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