Miss Piggy's Grocery Store Checkout Headlines

[Nephlite]

She deserves to spend a few years in jail.

She beat the dog snot outta that chick. Apparently the defense for Sharkeisha is putting dozens of similar confrontations the victim sparked on the table to prove the victim allegedly had it coming to her.

[Ksandra]

http://now.msn.com/swedish-prisoner-...-go-to-dentist

Sometimes you have to take matters into your own hands — especially when it's necessary to break out of prison to attend to a toothache. A Swedish inmate serving a one-month sentence at the obviously minimum-security Ostragard facility said he had complained to prison officials about the pain in his mouth, apparently to no avail. So he resorted to desperate measures: He busted out of jail, found a nearby dentist, had his inflamed tooth removed, then turned himself back in to police.

"My whole face was swollen," the 51-year-old told the Dagens Nyheter newspaper. "I just couldn't stand it anymore." When he got back to the prison, he was given a verbal reprimand and a one-day extension of his sentence. At least that extra day will be relatively pain-free.

[Tricen]

PS Swedish/Finnish/Swiss jails are fucking baller.

[Brill Weave]

Is anyone else amused that Mazmaz ran for the hills when people repeatedly pointed out his stance was racist?

[Silenka]

Not necessarily a headline but it headlined our Thanksgiving dinner when my sister's bf told us about it. I had no idea that http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Castoreum "natural raspberry flavoring" or more generally "natural flavors" often come from a beaver's ass

Makes me wonder what else is in my food that I didn't know about; I'm pretty anal (heh) about ingredients and try not to eat things with carmine (crushed bug coloring) or a lot of ingredients that I don't actually know anything about (herbal teas fall victim to this sometimes unless I can look up the ingredients before I buy). But seriously, beaver butt juice. Nasty.

[myreality]

Black friday! Everybody go nuts.



Murika! Fuck Yea!

[Moss]

the first rule of life is you will never win an argument against a ghetto black woman

[Tricen]

Oh man when they start repeating the same thing over and over again you should give up. God forbid they start clapping to every word they say. You're done. Game fucking over.

[Moss]

they are louder than you, meaner than you, give less fucks than you, and have done this 1,000 times before

Game fucking over.

[Krazy]

My friend told me at his Walmart one of the employees got their foot run over by a car and there were a bunch of temps that started fighting with each other in front of those $98 TVs.

[Ksandra]

Apparently there is an ATM in Antarctica:

http://www.needcoffee.com/2010/01/12...atm-interview/

I was fascinated when I learned that there was an ATM on Antarctica, specifically at McMurdo Station. Just because, you know, it's not like your local ATM that they can zip a service tech out to. So to sate my curiosity, I gave a ping to Wells Fargo, who manages that ATM--and got a chance to chat with David Parker. All shall be explained.

This interview was conducted via Skype on January 5, 2010.

Widgett: David, if you could tell me first what you do for Wells Fargo….what's your official title?

David Parker: I'm a Vice President in the ATM banking division.

W: So you're the Vice President over all the ATMs globally, or how does that work?

DP: One of them. I actually run a group that includes what we call "ATM quality," which is ensuring that our ATMs are working, that they're live and operational, and that customers are having a good experience.

W: Okay, and we specifically wanted to talk about the ATM that I guess you're in charge of there in Antarctica. So, you would be in charge of the quality of the experience of those people using that ATM in Antarctica?

DP: Correct.

W: Okay, that makes sense. Now, is there only one unit down there, or how many units do you guys have installed?

DP: Well, there's actually two.

W: Ah, a backup. That makes sense.

DP: That's exactly what it is. There are two pieces of hardware, but only one is operational at a time.

W: Ah. So that goes to one of my obvious questions, which is how exactly do you get service people down there to take care of it? So how do you do that? I mean, obviously, you've got a backup in place, but it seems that that would probably be one of your most challenging units.

DP: You know, that is a very good question, and you're right it is challenging--certainly makes for a long commute for our servicers. I'm kidding there…tongue-in-cheek… No, actually, what we do--first of all, the cash on the ice is recycled. So McMurdo Station (which is the scientists' station there on Antarctica)... any sort of venue, the cash is all recycled, and so there's no cash vendor that has to go down all the time to a regular ATM to replenish the cash volume.

W: Right…there's only so many places one can run with cash down there, I assume.

DP: Correct. So they may have, I don't know….maybe a company store and that kind of stuff and they can buy stuff there…anyway, the cash is all recycled around.

W: Right. Now, when was this first installed?

DP: Oh, you know, I don't know the exact date, but I'm going to take a wild stab in the dark here and I believe it was right around 2000.

W: Hmm. So what were they doing before 2000? Were they using...snow for currency, or what were they doing?

DP: (laughs) You know, I don't know the answer to that….I don't know what they were doing. You know, if you want I could kind of give you a little history of sort of how we got involved.

W: Please.

DP: I think the experiment or experiments that they are doing in Antarctica were part of one of the universities--or [had] heavy involvement from the university--and the university, I think, originally approached us and asked us if we'd put an ATM down there, and we of course had a very similar reaction to the one you just described, which was "Why would we need an ATM in Antarctica?" And I believe now that McMurdo is all run by Raytheon Corporation, and so that's a little history of sort of how we got involved in it. But now, as I said, the cash is all recycled, it's done by the employees there that work at McMurdo Station…and the other ATM…we have two ATMs there….one is operational at a time. The other is one that they can sort of cannibalize, if you will, for parts or spare things that they need to make the other one live and operational. We do send a vendor down about once every two years to do some preventative hardware maintenance on both of the ATMs, to make sure they're operational, change out the belts and that kind of stuff, provide new cartridges…anything else hardware-wise that we would need to make sure that it runs. But as you can imagine getting somebody down there is quite a feat.

W: Um—yeah.

DP: And it's obviously a trek, so it's only done once every other year.

W: Now, is there anything special about those machines, because, I mean, just from my experience with ATMs: they go down seemingly every time you need them in some cases. Is there anything special that you guys have done to those machines that you can get away with sending somebody down once every two years? Because that sounds like an impressive track record.

DP: Well, the one thing that we've done, obviously, is we've trained the folks that are there on the ice to take care of the ATM, so they are basically self-servicing the ATM in the meantime, and then, like I said, just doing a really heavy, heavy preventative maintenance once every other year, and then having the other ATM that they can sort of utilize if there's a problem with the one running at the time, they can switch it over or they can use it to change out parts and that kind of stuff, so it gives them some spare parts if it's needed.

W: Right. So if I were to compare the guts or the actual machine of this to just another Wells Fargo ATM, it's just a standard machine?

DP: That's correct.

W: Okay. So you guys have the only ATMs down there, I assume….

DP: Correct.

W: So really you could say that Wells Fargo handles the ATM banking for an entire continent.

DP: (laughs) That's true.

W: That should be in the literature. That sounds impressive just on its own.

DP: That's true, and actually you know what….I think this was in '98 when we did this, because the reason I remember that is that there was quite a bit of excitement when Y2K came around. It was the first ATM in the world to convert to Y2K because of the time.

W: Because we're not going to be able to get anybody down there….

DP: Right.

W: Okay, that makes sense.

DP: And everybody was interested in watching it to make sure there were no issues.

W: Nice. Okay, so obvious question then, I guess, comes next…I do not, myself, bank with Wells Fargo, so what would the service fees for me be like?

DP: It would be just like if you went to any other bank's ATM. So if you don't bank with Wells Fargo, if you went to one of our ATMs on Main Street, USA, you would pay the surcharge and then you could access that cash.

W: That's impressive. And fair, somehow. Now, it seems to me that, I mean, obviously, this is not sitting out on the ice, I mean, it's within the facility itself, but it seems like a very extreme location for an ATM. Are there any others that you guys have that you're aware of that you think would beat this one out, or does this pretty much take the cake for right now? I mean, until you put one on Mars or something.

DP: (laughs) We're not quite on Mars yet...

W: Not yet.

DP: I think this one would pretty much take the cake as far as the most unusual location. We do have a large presence in Alaska, so by that measure we're at the North Pole and the South Pole.

W: There you go. Wells Fargo worldwide…that's impressive. Again, one for the literature. Although you have to be careful, you never know….I guess Citigroup could be trying to install one at the top of K-2 to try to get some press from you.
DP: You know, the other thing too that you may find interesting--I don't know how much you know about folks that need to go down to Antarctica--it's a huge process to do it. So when we're preparing for the vendor visit, it's like a ten-month process.

W: Wow.

DP: The reason being is, they obviously go in the off-season when it's obviously warmer because no planes fly onto the ice in their winter months. And so anybody that goes to Antarctica has to be cleared with a physical, a dental, and a psychological evaluation, because if for some reason the plane can't get out, you're trapped down there until the next season.

W: Right. So if you send a vendor down there to work on ATMs and there's only two to work on, he'd probably better take some knitting with him or something.

DP: (laughs) Right…correct.

W: That's wild.

DP: And a lot of times, I think they go down first to Auckland, New Zealand and they're put on hold until their priority comes up to get on the plane to Antarctica. And the priorities are different, as you can imagine. I think one of the first priorities is the trash….so getting the trash out of McMurdo takes precedence over some of the other stuff. The flights in and out are all prioritized.

W: Right, of course. So trash, medical….but then if for some reason both ATMS were down, that would probably bump up his priority since otherwise they'd be writing IOUs on scraps of paper or something.

DP: Yeah, I'm sure that they would.

W: That's interesting. So is there a particular one vendor guy who is the "Antarctica Guy" that you use who is like the veteran of going to Antarctica to work on this thing, or does it rotate out or something?

DP: It rotates out, and I think it's the manufacturer's vendor that we send down…in other words, the folks that we bought the physical ATM box from….that actually go down and do the preventative maintenance, and I think probably the last couple trips it's been the same, but I know there's been other folks involved before.

W: I can just see if they give the assignments out like as they come in…you know, you're in the wrong place at the wrong time and suddenly your next ten months are spoken for, I guess.

DP: (laughs) Fortunately, nobody has ever missed it where they weren't able to get back out and had to stay until the next season. So you know, they go down, they do whatever they need to do, and they may be there for three or four days, or maybe a week, and they're able to get out.

W: Mmmm…..okay. I just mean the ten-month process of being set up to get down there, like you were talking about.

DP: Right. One other thing I wanted to correct something I said earlier, when you asked the question--you didn't have a Wells Fargo account and how much would it cost you….and actually, there is no surcharge at those ATMs. Raytheon who owns the stuff going on down there at McMurdo Station didn't want to charge their employees for that, and so we took that into consideration when we do our analysis as far as financials, so they're actually making up that difference for them.

W: Oh, well, so one gets a better deal on using the ATM at the end of the world than down the street.

DP: Yeah, because anybody who's using it there are employees.

W: Yes, of course, it makes sense. Now, David, let me ask you this--because every once in a while, ATMs get upgraded. Are those the same machines that were installed back in '98…are they still there? Or at what point do you say "We need to bring in the 2000 model" or something?

DP: That's a good question, and no….they are not the same ATMs. We actually swapped them out. They became part of our normal hardware refresh project and actually swapped them out during one of those vendor visits. And I think we probably did that maybe...four years ago or so.

W: Okay, so that's four years ago…so that would be about an eight-year life. So that's not too bad.

DP: And you know, it's like a car. If you drive it a lot of miles, the life is shorter…the same with an ATM. And obviously you can imagine that the transactions at this location are not what they would be on Main Street, USA. So the life would probably be a little bit longer.

W: Hmmm. That makes sense. Well, David, I think that's all the questions that I had. I think that's quite fascinating and I'm sure our readers will think so as well. I appreciate you talking to us about it.

DP: You're very welcome.

Many thanks to David for taking the time to talk to us and thanks as well to Richele at Wells Fargo for giving us the opportunity to chat.

[Kuya]

Oh man when they start repeating the same thing over and over again you should give up. God forbid they start clapping to every word they say. You're done. Game fucking over.

Pretty much. Only option at that point is to leave or hit them.

[Moss]

if you hit them you might as well say goodbye to your weave

[Anoat]

Unless you are a bus driver with a mean uppercut.

[Ghost_Wheel22]

Or an old man on a bus wearing a fanny.

[Ksandra]

Fannypacks are underrated.

[Ksandra]

Every now and then I like to go to snopes and check out their recent articles. In light of Thanksgiving I give you some wonderful tales from the turkey hotlines:

Key to the celebration of Thanksgiving is gathering with family and friends to partake of a sumptuous feast prepared in honor of the day. Central to that feast (or at least to our common mental image of it) is a roasted turkey laid on a platter before the hungry guests, the bird presented in all its mouthwatering crispy-skinned perfection.

Yet not every aspiring Thanksgiving-maker knows how to properly roast a turkey. Turkey The bird proves an utter mystery to some, resulting in many a holiday mishap of a culinary nature.

Luckily, those confounded by the fowl can access a great deal of help by calling a number of turkey preparation hotlines. While some offer only recorded tips on how to prepare and roast the bird, others provide live assistance from trained experts well experienced not only with poultry but with nervous and overwhelmed cooks. Over the years, these talk line mavens have fielded all manner of queries from those bewildered by the fickle bird.

One of the more unusual questions handled by Butterball's Turkey Talk-Line (which the company has operated since 1981) comes from those who have mistaken a well-traveled joke for an actual recipe: They call to ask if they can pop popcorn in the turkey's cavity during the roasting process. (The joke's punch line is: "You know the turkey is done when the popcorn pops and blows the rear off the bird.") And no, you can't.

Another gal called the hotline to complain about her bird's not having any breast meat. It became apparent during the ensuing conversation that the woman's turkey was upside-down.

The hotline has heard from a gal who couldn't find the turkey she buried in a snowbank, a guy who wanted to know how to carve his bird with a chain saw, and a mechanic who worried about using motor oil as a baste. (The merry chainsawer was also worried about oil — he was concerned that the oil from the chain might adversely affect the turkey.)

One caller told the operator she had always cut the legs off the turkey before putting it in the oven, thinking that was the method everyone used, because that is how her mother had always done it. As she later learned, her mom's oven was particularly small, necessitating that particular maneuver. (Such tale has been told over the years in various ways about many cooking or household tasks, as our article about "Grandma's Cooking Secret" attests.)

Then there was the young mother who failed to notice her children playing near the oven-ready bird. The kids decided the turkey's cavity was a good place to park toy cars. Their mom didn't discover Ol' Tom was doubling as a garage until after the turkey had been roasted.

Another confused cook called the Butterball line after cleaning her turkey because she wanted to know how to get the metal pieces out. "Apparently," said one of the Butterball economists, "she had scrubbed her bird with a steel scouring pad." A West Coast woman who had taken anti-bacterial precautions too far called Butterball to find out how to get the bleach she'd used off her bird.

Butterball turkey experts still talk about the Kentucky woman who called in 1993 to ask how to get her dog out of her turkey. It seems the woman's Chihuahua had dived into
the bird's cavity and become trapped there. The woman tried pulling the pooch and shaking the bird, all to no avail. A Butterball economist finally suggested the woman carefully cut the opening in the turkey wider to release the captive canine.

The Reynolds Wrap Turkey Tips Line (800-745-4000) took a query from a woman who wanted to know if she could cook her turkey by placing it in a Reynolds Oven Bag, putting it in the window in the back of her car, and letting the heat from the sun bake the turkey. (She was told that would be an uncontrolled heat source and was instructed to use an oven instead.)

The folks at Butterball have also dealt with cooks determined to roast turkeys on the back ledges of their cars. And they've had people call to ask if they could cook their holiday birds on radiators. Then there was the bride who had a small, apartment-size range and was worried the turkey would get larger as it cooked (similar to a loaf of bread rising) — she was fretting she wouldn't be able to get it out of the oven after it was done. Some other howlers include the woman who cleaned out her turkey with a scrub brush, people who thawed their turkeys in the bathtub while washing their kids, and a man looking for a quick way to cook his turkey who put it in the oven on the cleaning cycle.

There are those whose problems are not how to get the turkey out of the oven, but when. Said Nancy Rodriguez, coordinator of the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line in 1985, "One lady in Arkansas had her five-pound turkey in the oven 24 hours — did we think it was done? Another caller wanted to know the best method for reattaching the thighs and drumsticks when they fall off. His 12-pound turkey had been in the oven since 8 a.m. the day before."

The self-cleaning option offered on a number of ranges has caused its share of Thanksgiving troubles when confused cooks have inadvertently started its cycle while their birds were in the oven. Others have different range-related questions, such as: "Your directions say to roast the turkey, but my oven says only bake or broil; how do I set it?"

In a 2010 interview, the Turkey Talk-Line's director, Mary Clingman, described the weirdest call she'd gotten in all her years at the talk line:
A flustered father called a few hours after his wife had given birth to their first child. He was concerned that their Thanksgiving turkey had been thawing in the fridge for too long while he was at the hospital. When I asked the man how much it weighed, he replied, "The turkey or the baby?"
In a 2013 interview, Butterball's CEO Rod Brenneman was asked to relate one of the more unusual questions the company's turkey hotline had ever fielded:
A lady from Denver had left her turkey in a snowbank — that's where she stored it — and it had snowed the night before and she couldn't find it. She called and wanted to know how to locate her turkey in the snow. We said next year put a flag out there to help you.
A 2013 article about the Turkey Talk-Line's first male hire, Richard Jaramillo, asked him to describe his most amusing call:
My most amusing call so far was my second caller. She was asking me to locate a 36 pound turkey for her, because we do have resources to locate a specific size turkey. I said, "Ma'am, at 36 pounds that's not a turkey. That's an ostrich! There’s two reasons why we don't carry that size and we can't locate that for you. One, that's the size of an ostrich. Two, your average oven won't give enough head space for the turkey to be able to cook evenly." The funny thing is she was like, "You're right. I couldn't fit a 36 pound turkey in my oven!" It’s just one of those "ah-ha" moments where she was doing the math according to the group that she was cooking for, but not thinking about the logistics of actually executing it. So I was able to help her figure it out. I recommended she cook two turkeys instead for a total of 30 pounds.
We'll leave it to others to provide the more mundane advice regarding thawing and cooking times, how to prepare the bird for roasting and how to prepare stuffing, and instead offer these useful tips, as gleaned from the experiences of turkey hot line counselors:

Do not leave your turkey on your back porch, either to slow thaw it or to keep it chilled until the big day. Those who have failed to heed this advice have discovered themselves birdless on Thanksgiving morning. Their loss was the local raccoons' gain — those masked marauders celebrated the day in fine style.

If you choose to bring home your frozen bird within the car proper rather than in the trunk, do take care to seatbelt the fowlsicle lest a sudden stop transform the star of the upcoming dinner into a weighty frozen projectile. One woman who failed to belt down her bird was rewarded for her lack of foresight with a broken toe when a sharp tap of the brakes caused the iced fowl to slide off the seat and onto her foot.


Read more at http://www.snopes.com/holidays/thank...d1d4g1HkYCx.99

[SamanosukeShiva]

[zoobernut]

I just saw someone post this gem of an article to facebook. It gave me a good chuckle until I realized people actually believe this crap then I became sad.

http://gaia-health.com/gaia-blog/201...my-son-autism/

Spoiler: show

I should start by saying that I was raised Catholic. The concepts of reconciliation and absolution are completely ingrained in me. I grew up going to confession at a beautiful monastery where Father Francis, an elderly monk, held my hand as we walked the grounds, and I asked for forgiveness for my transgressions. I always felt great relief and unconditional love after our time together. Unfortunately, Father Francis passed away years ago, and I haven’t been to confession since. My spiritual beliefs have evolved and changed over the years, but the idea of forgiveness is still critical to how I walk through life. There are things I have done for which I know God forgives me. However, I’m pretty sure that I will never forgive myself, for my transgressions are embodied in a beautiful seven-year-old who tells me daily that I am “the best Mom in the universe.” I know the truth. And someday, so will he. All of these “unforgivable” actions were done with the best of intentions, but we all know what they say about “good intentions” and “the road to hell.” I am admitting here for all the world to see: I gave my son Autism. I did it. Me. And no one can ever take that away.

So … how did I give my son autism? I wish I could say it was one thing—one thing that I could take back that would make things neat and easy, but it wasn’t. It was mistake after mistake, assault after assault. The following are the biggest mistakes I made to which I attribute my son’s descent into autism. I’m going to provide links that are easily readable and understandable that contain links to the research rather than providing links to the research itself. A simple Google search about any one of these topics will provide more information than you could ever want. Here goes . . .

1) Ultrasounds: I had at least five while I was pregnant. I was assured that they were completely safe. Heck, you can get them in malls, so I assumed they were pretty benign. Wrong! While I didn’t get ultrasounds in malls, I didn’t research them either. Ultrasounds have, in fact, been implicated in autism among other neurological disorders. While there is no definitive “causal link,” enough has been found to warrant further research and precautionary measures. According to this article, “Research shows populations exposed to ultrasound have a quadrupled perinatal death rate, increased rates of brain damage, nerve cell demylienation, dyslexia, speech delays, epilepsy and learning difficulty.” Sound familiar?

2) High-fructose corn syrup: I drank Coca Cola every single day while I was pregnant. I was so incredibly nauseous and it made my stomach feel better. Fast forward a few years and Coca Cola Classic was found to have one of the highest levels of mercury due to HFCS of any product tested. I didn’t eat one bite of fish during my pregnancy for fear of mercury. While I didn’t know there was mercury in the Coke, I have to be honest and admit that of course I knew that eating and drinking junk wasn’t good for my baby.

Foods Containing Mercury
High fructose corn syrup’s not-so-sweet surprise: Mercury!

3) Lortab/Acetaminophen (Paracetamol) while pregnant: I have Fibromyalgia. It is painful normally, but it was practically unbearable while I was pregnant. My OB prescribed Lortab telling me that it didn’t cross the placenta and was perfectly safe. I was in so much pain that I wasn’t about to look into this further. I trusted my OB thoroughly and needed to feel better.

Again, did I honestly think that this was good for the baby? Of course not. Lortab is a Category C drug which basically means that not enough human testing has been done to qualify it as safe, but based on animal studies, there is reason to believe that it could be dangerous or problematic. I couldn’t find any specific links between Lortab and Autism, but common sense dictates that this was not good.

4) Pitocin: Two of the ultrasounds I received at the end of my pregnancy revealed that my water was getting dangerously low, so my OB felt we should induce labor. After several hours of not making progress on the Pitocin drip at low levels, the hospital encouraged me to sign a waiver allowing them to increase the Pitocin to illegal levels. Now, I know this seems absurd, but at the time, I was in incredible pain and was told by hospital staff that it was perfectly safe and was used at these levels all over the country. According to them, Montana just has a very low cap on the highest level allowed. I had Pitocin for 36 hours. Here is an explanation from an excellent article on that explains the potential risks associated with Pitocin:

In either induced or enhanced use of Pitocin, the blood supply, and therefore the oxygen source to the uterus, is greatly reduced. With naturally-paced contractions, there is a time interval between contractions allowing for the baby to be fully oxygenated before the next contraction. In induced or enhanced labor, the contractions are closer together and last for a longer time, thus shortening the interval where the baby receives the oxygen supply. Reduced oxygen to the baby in labor has life-long consequences on the baby’s brain function.

5) C-Section: George Malcolm Morley, OB/GYN has done extensive research regarding C-Sections and autism and has concluded that, “A baby born by C-section is 3-4 times more likely to have autism.” His theory is that it is probably due to ICC (immediate cord clamping) and there are really good reasons to think he may be right. There are so many different elements that play a part in C-sections, however, that it is really hard to determine exactly which specific aspect is problematic: anesthesia, maternal immobility, labor trauma, cord clamping, post-op drugs or lack of friendly bacteria due to bypassing the vaginal canal are all suspect individually. It is easy to see how a combination of all of the above could have a negative impact.

Because I had made the bad decisions about the ultrasounds that led to the bad decision about the Pitocin that led to labor trauma, I ultimately had to have an emergency C-section. I can’t believe that there are so many women who choose to deliver via C-section for cosmetic reasons – I won’t elaborate on this one. Ick. I’ll be honest; I am still a little bitter about this. I really wanted a natural childbirth. My husband and I took the classes; we practiced at home. Thirty-six hours of drug-induced hell, and I still ended up with a C-section. And not just a regular C-section: it was such an emergency that I had to be anesthetized via general anesthesia, even though I had an epidural in place.

6) Antibiotics: Oh boy. Where to begin? I have so many mixed feelings about antibiotics. Here is what I know: My son was exposed to antibiotics while he was in distress during labor. He was then exposed for the first two weeks of his life via breast milk. He then received five courses of antibiotics before he was a year old for chronic ear infections. While this is bad cumulatively, the one event that stands out for me, and literally makes me feel sick, was a single dose of Augmentin when he was six months old. At his six-month “well” visit, he was diagnosed with his second ear infection. He received vaccinations for seven different diseases despite being ill, and we left with a prescription for Amoxicillin. Six days later, he had developed an upper respiratory infection and the ear infection was worse. Because the Amoxicillin hadn’t worked, the pediatrician prescribed a course of Augmentin. After one dose of this drug and within 24 hours, my six-month-old baby had 35 acidic, liquid bowel movements. The skin literally peeled off of his bottom in sheets. I had never seen anything like it at that time, and I haven’t since. The pain that he was in was beyond description. I called the doctor and she changed the antibiotic to yet a different kind. So he had three different types of antibiotics in his system within eight days. This episode was the biggie. His gut was never the same after that. Nothing was.

Here is what everyone should know about Augmentin: Augmentin has been implicated in autism. It is comprised of Amoxicillin and clavulanate potassium. When it is manufactured, the clavulanic acid is fermented which involves large amounts of urea/ammonia. Even a small amount of ingested ammonia can potentially cause gut and brain inflammation. I strongly urge you to do your homework before using this drug.

If you will notice in this link, this study was released in January of 2005. My son was prescribed Augmentin in January of 2006. This was never mentioned when I was handed the prescription. However, if I had been a Thinker back then, I could have quickly Googled “Augmentin and autism,” and I would have made a very different decision.

7) Vaccines: I really don’t even know what to say about vaccines other than to say that if I had it to do over again, my children wouldn’t have received a single one. Of everything I did wrong, if I could have my pick of one thing to take back, it would be the shots. No question. Shortly after my son turned three, we left the idiot pediatrician that led me down this trail of terror. The new MD looked at my son’s blood work and heavy metals testing and informed me unequivocally that my son was vaccine injured and that he had never been a candidate for immunization. She said that because of my fibromyalgia and the fact that autoimmune disease and digestive disorders are pervasive across both sides of our family, he never should have been vaccinated. Add in the birth history and the fact that he had severe jaundice and a cephalohematoma that took more than six months to resolve, plus rashes, severe reflux, chronic rhinitis and ear infections along with eczema, it should have been very apparent that his immune system was not functioning properly. Vaccination REQUIRES a properly functioning immune system to work, which may explain why he has ZERO titers to the diseases he was immunized against. According to the CDC and the vaccine inserts, children should not be vaccinated if they are sick or on antibiotics. My son was sick and/or on antibiotics for almost every single round of vaccinations. People, I know what happened to my kid. I KNOW. I watched it. Ginger Taylor has been compiling studies for years that link vaccines to autism. That list has now reached over 60 studies.

Another word—Don’t bother making comments arguing about vaccines. I won’t post them. I am fully aware that there are children with autism who weren’t vaccinated. I am not suggesting that vaccines are solely responsible for every child’s autism. I know, however, that they caused irreparable damage to my son’s immune system, which ultimately led to his autism. There. Done.

8) Acetaminophen/Paracetamol: My baby received an incredible amount of this red, liquid death. Acetaminophen shuts down the production of glutathione, the body’s #1 antioxidant. Glutathione is absolutely critical in the body’s ability to rid itself of toxins. So basically, one of the absolute worst things you can do is to give a baby acetaminophen when they get vaccinations or when their body is trying to fight an infection. The nurse at my son’s pediatrician’s office literally dosed him with acetaminophen at the exact moment she stuck in the needle. When the ear infections and stomach pain and fevers started as a result of the vaccine damage, I gave him acetaminophen to alleviate his pain. Are you starting to see how all of these horrors interlace? One problem requires a solution that creates another problem that requires a solution that creates another problem, etc. For more information regarding acetaminophen and its link to autism, click here.

9) Fluoride: Fluoride probably pisses me off more than anything else on this list, because I am convinced that the fluoride program is one of the biggest scams ever perpetrated on a population in the history of mankind. If you ever have some time and enjoy history, Google “the history of fluoride.” It reads like a Dan Brown novel and would be completely entertaining, if it weren’t for the fact that children are being brain-damaged by the very water they drink. I’ll let you do your own research for the nitty-gritty, but here are the basics: Fluoride contains fluorine. Fluorine is only slightly less toxic than arsenic and is more toxic than lead. It is also a carrier molecule. It loves to combine with other materials and create even more toxic situations. It also can cross the blood/brain barrier. So if there is circulating aluminum in the body from say, oh, I don’t know, vaccine adjuvants for instance, or if there is lead in the joints of water pipes, the fluoride can attach itself to these toxins and escort them right across the blood/brain barrier and into the brain. According to the National Research Council, 36 studies have linked fluoride with reduced IQ in children. Here are some great links to fluoride information:

Fluoride Toxicity Research Collaborative
Fluoride Action Network
NoFluoride.com
Chronic Fluroide Poisoning

Here’s the kicker. This is the part where I bang my head on the table, pull my hair and yell, “Stupid, Stupid, Stupid!” like Chris Farley on SNL. We didn’t even have fluoridated water. I actually purchased it and gave it to my son on purpose. My pediatrician told me that he needed it because our water wasn’t fluoridated. I bought “nursery water” that came in cute little plastic bottles with pictures of Bert and Ernie and Cookie Monster on them. I also gave him prescription vitamins—Poly Vi Flor—that contained fluoride. After all of this, we still ended up with over $4,000 worth of dental work by the time he was five. This dental work required general anesthesia that contained—yep, you guessed it—fluoride. Fluoride is also in many pharmaceuticals, including the antibiotic Cipro–drops used for ear infections—and Diflucan—the yeast killer we used off and on for years. How in the hell could I make sure that I didn’t give him toothpaste that had fluoride in it because it was poisonous, but give him fluoridated water? If you want a good scare, read the label on a tube of fluoridated toothpaste sometime. Ingestion of only half a tube of that candy-flavored fluoridated toothpaste could be fatal to a child, and yet we fluoridate our water supply. It is criminal in my opinion.

I can think of many more things I did wrong that I am sure contributed to my son’s health crisis. I will mention diet, toxic cookware, benzocaine teething gel and toxic building materials but won’t elaborate because at this point, common sense should dictate. I am writing this to try to hit the biggies that people really need to research to make better decisions than I did.

I am already anticipating three different responses to this post:

Response 1) There will be people who read this and think, “Good grief, woman. How stupid can you be? What you did borders on child abuse. Of course your child has Autism.” And to that, I have no argument. You are absolutely right. And good for you for knowing better than I did.

Response 2) Some of you will read this and know exactly how I feel because your story is very similar. To all of you, you have my deepest, heartfelt sympathy. While we will always have our mistakes to live with, the best thing we can do now is to share our truth and our story to help others.

Response 3) There will be people who feel pity for me because I have not been able to make peace with myself for my role in my son’s health crisis. You will feel compelled to reach out to me with kind messages imploring me to forgive myself. Please … don’t. It won’t do any good. I am not fishing for forgiveness, and while I know you mean well, it won’t help me. If you really, really want to help, take five minutes and send this blog to everyone you know—especially those who are pregnant or have babies. Implore them to read this blog. No child should have to endure what mine has endured. No mother should ever have to experience the kind of torturous guilt I live with every day.

The mistakes I made were, by and large, recommended by healthcare professionals. That is no excuse. My son’s health was my responsibility. I could choose to follow the recommendations or not. Even a small bit of research would have changed the outcome for my son. There are women, as we speak, who are on the way to the doctor for their second or third ultrasound. There are mothers dosing their babies with acetaminophen before their shots. There are expectant moms being hooked up to Pitocin drips. Some moms are administering unnecessary antibiotics for yet another ear infection and haven’t made the connection that their baby’s immune system is failing. There are also many, many mothers who are hearing the following words for the first time, “Your child has autism.” Help them.

I truly believe that my son’s autism was preventable. Think. Research. At this point, you can’t afford not to.

~ Mountain Mama

[SephYuyX]

I just saw someone post this gem of an article to facebook. It gave me a good chuckle until I realized people actually believe this crap then I became sad.

http://gaia-health.com/gaia-blog/201...my-son-autism/

I like how the mod of that site is basically mouth shitting in agreeance.

-Logical statement from doctor or mother.
--NO YOURE WRONG