Miss Piggy's Grocery Store Checkout Headlines

[Kuya]

Bf seems to think it's fun to just go to a mall to look at stuff. Interesting definition of fun he has.

[archibaldcrane]

My wife isn't terrible.

I win!

[Acevalefor]

I guess I just have a much different relationship with my wife. She doesn't pull that kind of stuff with me. If she wants to go store hopping, she goes without me.

Also, Archi, my wife is better than your wife!

[Moss]

My wife isn't terrible.

I win!

Opposites attract I guess.

[AoE]

Mom trained me for this shit at a young age, so I know better. Luckily I've not had any girlfriends that have this habit but it's only a matter of time.

[Tyrath]

Edit: Decided to post this in youtube comments since religion and politics and shit.

[CoreyX]

My boyfriend likes to stop at Walmart for 2 hours of fun-filled shoptivities on literally every single date we have. One of these days I'm just going to jump out of the car while we're headed there -.-

[BaneTheBrawler]

don't worry, he'll probably come out of the closet first

[Ksandra]

I thought this was cute:

http://www.boston.com/travel/blog/20...aus_magic.html

WestJet airlines surprises travelers with Santa Claus magic

A Canadian Airline called WestJet put on a remarkable, and heartwarming, stunt. Each of the 250 passengers boarding flights out of the Toronto and Hamilton International Airports were treated to a very real visit from a virtual Santa Claus.

The airline set up electronic Santa chat boxes in the terminals of the two airports, where passengers (children and parents alike) were able to tell Santa what they want for Christmas this year, according to Mashable.com. While the planes departed for their destination, 150 WestJet employees reportedly went on a shopping spree to purchase personalized presents for everyone on board.

As the story goes, the passengers arrived at the baggage claim in Calgary greeted by hand-wrapped presents – exactly what they’d asked of Santa. The crowd unwrapped everything from toys and gadgets to flights home for the holidays. Some were brought to tears.

WestJet will donate flights if the video receives at least 200,000 YouTube views, Mashable.com reported. Last year, the company set up a holiday flash mob in the middle of an airport. After receiving more than a half million video views, they donated flights to a family in need through their community investment program.

With all the stress caused by seasonal travel, airports aren’t the first place you’d expect to see holiday cheer. 'Tis the season to be pleasantly surprised.

[Obev]

http://metro.co.uk/2013/12/12/eugeni.../?ITO=facebook

A grandfather caught masturbating in a Sainsbury’s meat aisle has been banned from every supermarket in UK.

Eugenio Freitas, 49, was recorded on CCTV pleasuring himself through his trousers for ten minutes at a store in Newcastle-under-Lyme, Staffordshire.

The married father-of-four pleaded guilty to outraging public decency and was handed a six-month suspended prison sentence on Wednesday.

A court heard how Mr Freitas had ‘fully intended’ to go shopping on July 8 but became overwhelmed by his ‘excessive sexual drive’.

Cue about five hundred "tickling the pork," "basting the beef," "choking the chicken" references on the newspaper's facebook page.

[Howie Roary]

what a jerk

[Viq]

Poor guy. Just had a stroke of bad luck.

[Qalbert]

what a wanker

[Salodin]

Got off pretty easy honestly.

[BaneTheBrawler]

he could have ended up doing a lot worse- sounds like someone saved his bacon

[AidenCarby]

Glad they pulled him out of there in time.

[Ghost_Wheel22]

Didn't see that once coming.

[Jaybar]

He just wanted to put some rub on that tenderloin.

[Ksandra]

[edit]wrong thread.

[Tricen]

He was jamaican them crazy with that jerked meat.