Miss Piggy's Grocery Store Checkout Headlines

**Byrthnoth** · 2011-09-27 11:21

I figure this fits here.

lolFlorida, stay classy.

**Drex** · 2011-09-27 15:27

Originally Posted by Byrthnoth

According to police reports, a violent confrontation ensued after officers tried to handcuff Gilberto Powell to investigate a bulge they spotted in his pants.

Going to hell cause I laughed

**Lucienne** · 2011-09-28 17:44

Some news guy in Australian radio:

**The Stig** · 2011-09-30 15:02

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...ge-attack.html

When PlayStation turns nasty: Father, 46, tracks down and throttles schoolboy, 13, in revenge attack for 'killing' him on Call Of Duty

'I'd been playing the whole day and he was baiting me and baiting me and just would not shut up. He went on and on and I just lost it'
Boy's mother: 'If you can’t handle losing to a child then you shouldn’t be playing games'

By Chris Parsons

Last updated at 2:11 PM on 30th September 2011

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/...22_233x517.jpg Furious: Mark Bradford, 46, attacked the teenager after being 'killed' by the schoolboy in an online game of Call of Duty

A middle-aged man charged round to the house of a schoolboy and throttled him after his online character was killed during a game of Call Of Duty, a court heard.
Mark Bradford, 46, was furious when he was gunned down in the war simulation by the 13-year-old, and 'lost it' when the youngster goaded him over his online death.
Unemployed father of three Bradford stormed from his bedsit in Plymouth, Devon, and confronted the youngster at the boy's friend's house by placing his hands round the schoolboy's neck.
The pair had been playing Call Of Duty: Black Ops against each other online and talking using microphones.
The attack ended when the teenager's horrified mother pulled Bradford off the boy, who was left scratched and with reddening to the neck.
Plymouth Magistrates heard that Bradford then simply walked away without saying a word.
The boy, who cannot be identified, said: 'I was just sat playing. We’d had a bit of a joke and then he stormed in and grabbed me.
'I didn’t know what was going on.'
Gareth Warden, prosecuting, said the teenager was playing the game at a friend's house when he called Bradford a name after he 'killed' him.
He added that Bradford went to a nearby house where the boy was playing, walked into the front room and grabbed him around the throat with both hands.

More...

The teenager's mother, 33, said: 'It’s pathetic that a grown man would attack a defenceless child like this.
'If you can’t handle losing to a child then you shouldn’t be playing games.'
Tracey Baker, mitigating, said Bradford, who had mental health issues, 'just lost it'. He told the court the attack was not planned and was provoked by the name-calling.
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/...39_468x253.jpg The Call Of Duty series is one of the best-selling computer game franchises of all time

Magistrates ordered a probation officer to prepare a full report on his background before he is sentenced.
Bradford was released on unconditional bail to return to court on October 24.
'Call Of Duty' features a variety of war scenes and carries an 18 guidance certificate.
Participants combat each other online in real time and can communicate with each other throughout the war game scenarios.
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/...58_468x322.jpg Guilty: Bradford admitted one assault charge at Plymouth Magistrates Court
Bradford admitted the attack was 'moment of madness' as the child 'would not shut up'.
He said: 'I'd been playing the whole day and he was baiting me and baiting me and just would not shut up.
'He went on and on and I just lost it. I hold my hands up, I lost the plot. In a moment of madness I went round to his house. I didn't know what I was going to do.
'It wasn't malice. I just grabbed him. I've seen him since and apologised. We've played online too. He's actually a decent kid.'
Bradford admitted one count of assault by beating at Plymouth Magistrate's Court on Wednesday.

Bradford is thought to be a loosely-connected friend of the boy's family

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...#ixzz1ZT4deUj6

**Ezek** · 2011-09-30 19:22

http://www.news.com.au/world/karla-f...-1226151667369

Mexican woman Karla Flores survives live grenade lodged in her face

SHE is known as the 'Miracle Woman' in her home of Mexico and having survived a grenade fired into her face it's easy to see why.

It all started one day when Karla Flores, a mother-of-three, from Culiacán, in the state of Sinaloa, was selling seafood on the street, the Daily Mail reported.

She heard a bang and something hit her, knocking her down. Ms Flores felt a burning sensation in her face and when she raised her hand to it there was blood.

Then she lost consciousness.

When Ms Flores woke up in Culiacán General Hospital she thought a stone or rock must have got lodged in her face.

The 32-year-old said: "The doctor asked me what happened. I told him that I thought a stone hit me.

"Then they started to look and discovered that it was some kind of projectile, but they didn't know what it was."

The X-ray and the tomography showed a weird object stuck between the superior and inferior jawbones.

Then they realised - it wasn't a stone, it was a live grenade.

The hospital was put on alert because the deadly explosive could go off at any moment and kill everyone within 10 metres.

**Melena** · 2011-10-05 15:30

PETA wants cannibal to have to go on a vegan diet

http://www.contracostatimes.com/news/ci_19046924

Regardless of whether Omaima Aree Nelson -- the California woman who ate parts of her husband's body after killing him -- is granted parole after 20 years in prison Wednesday, she shouldn't be allowed to eat meat of any kind again, according to a prominent animal rights group.
In a letter sent to the warden at Chowchilla State Prison women's facility Tuesday, the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals requested that Nelson be switched to a vegan diet if she remains incarcerated -- or if she's released.

Though the announcement from PETA sounded like a publicity stunt, representatives contacted Wednesday by the Daily Pilot said the effort to keep the inmate from eating meat is serious.
"The last thing that a convicted killer and cannibal should be allowed to do is chew on these innocent victims' body parts," PETA Special Projects Coordinator Carrie Snider wrote in the letter to the warden. "Eating humane and healthy vegan food will undoubtedly help Nelson lose her taste for blood."
Nelson killed her husband during Thanksgiving weekend in 1991. She was in her 20s, and her husband in his 50s, when the Egyptian model dismembered his corpse and cooked and ate some of his body parts in their Costa Mesa apartment. They had been married about a month.

"If people are revolted by the idea of eating a human corpse, perhaps they should also lose their appetites at the though of eating anyone's skinned and sauteed body parts,"
said PETA President Ingrid E. Newkirk in a media statement.
The organization even offered to send the prison one of its vegetarian/vegan starter kits.
During her trial, Nelson's used the "battered wife" defense, claiming she had been raped by her husband the night before she killed him.
The Orange County district attorney's office is strongly opposing Nelson's release. She was sentenced to 27 years t -life in prison.

**Kerberoz** · 2011-10-05 20:35

http://www.consumerfreedom.com/press...slaughterhouse

Consumer Group Asks Virginia Government to Reclassify PETA as a Slaughterhouse

New Data Shows PETA Killed 97 Percent Of Dogs And Cats In 2006

WASHINGTON, DC- Yesterday the nonprofit Center for Consumer Freedom formally petitioned Virginia's Department of Agriculture and Consumer Services (VDACS), requesting that the government agency officially reclassify People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) as a slaughterhouse.

An official report filed by PETA itself shows that the animal rights group put to death nearly every dog, cat, and other pet it took in for adoption in 2006. During that year, the well-known animal rights group managed to find adoptive homes for just 12 animals. Not counting pets brought to PETA for spaying or neutering, the organization killed 2,981 of the 3,061 “companion animals” it took in. According to VDACS, the average euthanasia rate for humane societies in Virginia was 34.7 percent in 2006. PETA's "kill rate" was 97.4 percent.

“It is absurd to classify PETA as a ‘humane society’ when its employees are slaughtering nearly every companion animal they bring in,” said CCF Director of Research David Martosko. “PETA has killed over 17,000 pets since 1998. Given the group's astonishing habit of killing adoptable dogs and cats with such ruthless efficiency, it's only fair that the state of Virginia refer to PETA as a slaughterhouse.”

CCF’s letter to VDACS Commissioner Todd Haymore reads as follows:

Spoiler: show

MaachaQ · 2011-10-07 04:08

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/44804458...ews/?GT1=43001

'Weekend at Bernie's'? Not so, says bar-hopping man who drove around with dead friend
'In my mind, I wanted to believe he was passed out. I didn't want to call 911'

Robert Young, 43, leaves a Denver courtroom on Thursday with his attorney. He is accused of driving around Denver with a dead friend in the back of a car and running up a bar tab on the friend's credit card.
By STEVEN K. PAULSON

DENVER — A man accused of driving around Denver with a dead friend in the back of a car and running up a bar tab on the friend's account says he thought the man was drunk, not deceased.

Robert Young, 43, faces charges including abusing a corpse. He spoke before a court hearing Thursday in Denver.

Investigators allege Young and Mark Rubinson, 25, drove around with the body of their 43-year-old friend Jeffrey Jarrett in their car in August.

"In my mind, I wanted to believe he was passed out. I didn't want to call 911," Young said Thursday. "I didn't want to believe he was dead."

According to police reports, the night on the town started when Young went to Jarrett's home and found him unresponsive.

But rather than call the authorities, police say, Young went to find Rubinson.

The duo returned to Jarrett's home and put him into Rubinson's SUV and headed to a nightspot where they spent more than an hour drinking, leaving Jarrett's body in the vehicle, according to police records.

Police say the two men used Jarrett's card to pay for the drinks on Aug. 27, noting "they did not have Jarrett's consent."

Young said he realized Jarrett was dead while leaving the bar and the two men took him back to his home after notifying police. They then went to a strip joint, where Young took $400 from an ATM, police said.

Young said Jarrett owed him money and gave him his credit card.

Young rejected comparisons to the plot of the 1989 movie "Weekend at Bernie's." He said the ordeal only lasted four hours, and insisted there was no comparison to the movie.

"It's not a joking matter. He deserves better than that," Young said.

In the 1989 Hollywood comedy, two ne'er-do-wells find their boss dead at his ritzy beachfront home and escort his body around town, attempting to save the weekend of luxury they had planned

Rubinson and Young aren't charged in Jarrett's death.

Young was scheduled to be arraigned Thursday, but his attorney was granted an extension to Nov. 3 after she told the judge authorities are still waiting for the results of an autopsy to determine how and when Jarrett died.

**wop** · 2011-10-11 11:29

Bangladesh unveils $130 'Dell' laptop

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-south-asia-15261076

http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/image...8_dscn1403.jpg

Bangladesh has unveiled a domestically made laptop which officials claim is one of the cheapest in the world.

Prime Minister Sheikh Hasina launched the computer, named Doel, at a ceremony in the capital Dhaka on Tuesday. It is the first laptop made in the country.

The state-owned telecoms company Telephone Shilpa Sangstha (TSS) is producing four models of the laptop.

The most basic one is priced at 10,000 taka ($130/£83). The primary model runs the android operating system.

"This is a big step towards building a digital Bangladesh. When villages get laptops at a cheaper price they will be connected to the internet and that will bring lots of benefits," TSS managing director Mohammad Ismail told the BBC.

Initially, the laptop will be distributed to various government departments. But later on they will be made available to the public and to tens of millions of students.

Mr Ismail said that at the moment Bangladesh is producing 10% of the components for the laptop and the rest are imported.

"But within six months we will be able to produce 60% of the components," he said.

However, the country's internet connectivity remains poor and critics have raised doubts whether the distribution of laptops alone will help the country to connect digitally.

The government has launched an ambitious plan, known as Digital Bangladesh, with the aim of digitally connecting the country by 2021.

"Every part of the country will be brought under e-governance, while the telecommunication system is being modernised to cut the digital divide," Sheikh Hasina said during the inauguration.

**Correction** · 2011-10-12 14:06

$1.4 Million in Damages Awarded to Mom After...ew

LOUISVILLE, Ky. - A jury Thursday night awarded nearly $1.4 million in damages to a mother whose premature baby was decapitated during delivery at a Louisville hospital in 2006.

Under the verdict, reached after about five hours of deliberation, the two doctors involved must pay the mother, Micheatria Donelson, the $1.4 million for pain and suffering.

The hospital and the nurses involved in the case were not held liable, and the jury declined to award punitive damages.

The damages were much less than the $18 million that Donelson had sought. But one of her attorneys, Mark Mathys, said the verdict was a "vindication" for Donelson, who suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety and depression.

"This is a clear victory for Micheatria," he said. "This is a significant amount of money that will help her for the rest of her life."

Attorneys for Norton Suburban Hospital said they were pleased with the decision but declined to comment further.

But Terry Lee, a nurse in labor and delivery at Norton who sat with the hospital's attorneys through the trial and had sutured the baby's head back on, praised jurors for their work in "a very complicated" and emotional case.

"I felt like we did the best we could," she said of the nursing staff during the Feb. 24, 2006, delivery. "It was a very difficult situation, and I feel for Ms. Donelson too. It was a very difficult case for everybody."

Donelson, who testified earlier in the trial and was in court for the closing arguments, was not present for the verdict.

Dr. Joseph Bilotta and his partner, Dr. William Koontz, also were not in court for the verdict, and their attorneys did not comment afterward.

The jury, which was not unanimous, found Koontz 57 percent responsible for the $1,362,499 in damages and Bilotta 43 percent responsible.

The jurors -- six men and six women -- declined to comment, with one saying they had agreed not to speak with the news media.

Earlier Thursday, Don Darby, one of the doctors' attorneys, told the jury during closing arguments that while the delivery was an "unfortunate tragedy," the doctors did nothing wrong.

Everyone involved in the case agreed it was a rare, if not unheard of, situation in which a fetus is decapitated during birth.

"It could not have been predicted or prevented by nursing care," Beth McMasters, an attorney for Norton and the nurses who were in the delivery room, said in her closing argument.

Darby told the jury that the baby would not have survived regardless of what the doctors and nurses did, because the pregnancy was only about 21 weeks in duration.

"I don't think you can come to any other conclusion," he said.

Donelson's attorneys, however, believe she was about 24 weeks into the pregnancy, an age at which babies can survive.

Donelson's attorneys contended that Bilotta failed to remove a cerclage, a string similar to a shoelace, that was used to keep Donelson's cervix closed and the child in the womb.

When Donelson began delivering, the string acted "as a noose" and helped cause the decapitation when Bilotta pulled on the child, Mathys has said.

But Bilotta testified that while he initially attempted to deliver the baby with the string still in, he removed it. And he told jurors it would be "physically impossible" to deliver the child through the string.

Donelson's attorneys also have said nurses ignored her buzzer calls seeking help as the baby began emerging and then compounded problems by not restricting her view during delivery and later suturing the child's head onto the body so she could hold him throughout the night and next day.

"No one prepared her for what was going on," Mathys said in his closing argument. "The reason that this is never heard of is because it doesn't happen unless somebody does something wrong."

Bilotta said using drapes to shield the mother from seeing a delivery was common decades ago, as part of sterilization, but for him it's not "a concern or thought anymore."

Darby told jurors the allegations were "all retrospective" and that no one could have predicted or anticipated what was going to happen.

Donelson's body "rejected this fetus, that's what happened," he said.

And McMasters said the nurses did not deliver the baby and provided appropriate care, never abandoning or "ignoring" Donelson.

"The nurses went right in" when Donelson began delivery, she said, adding that the mother had the right to see her child and requested to do so.

"Every single nurse took good care of Ms. Donelson," McMasters said.

Earlier in the trial, Donelson said she had gone to Norton because of bleeding on Feb. 23, 2006, and Bilotta told her the next day that it was likely that her child was not going to live.

After calling her boyfriend to tell him the news, Donelson testified Friday that she began to cry and after coughing, the child began to come out, feet first.

She testified that she called for nurses "but no one came, and I felt him kicking and I called again," alleging the doctor and nurses came in about five minutes later.

"I was just sitting there waiting for them to come help my baby that was kicking and trying to come out," Donelson testified.

Donelson, who now has a 2-year-old daughter, said she is depressed, has panic attacks and is unable to sleep more than a few hours each night.

"I know when I go to sleep I'm going to have the same nightmares," she said.

Mathys told jurors that Donelson had gone to school to work with children but abandoned that career after the incident.

MaachaQ · 2011-10-12 23:17

http://www.delish.com/food/recalls-r...propriate-note

**Pyro** · 2011-10-13 06:43

Shouldn't have been a fat and shitty waitress.

**hey** · 2011-10-13 10:03

Originally Posted by Pyro

Shouldn't have been a fat and shitty waitress in a war zone.

fixed.

**clobetasol** · 2011-10-15 17:07

Harold Camping predicts Oct. 21 rapture — again

So, the rapture didn’t happen last time preacher Harold Camping said it would. When May 21 finally rolled around, there weren’t any trumpet sounds and Camping — along with millions of other Christians — didn’t rise up into the sky.
Maybe the end wasn’t nigh after all. But a whole lot of atheists in Seattle had a fun party and raised a few thousand dollars for a non-religious camp for kids.
Now, Camping is saying thereal rapture happens later this month. May 21 was a deadline of sorts — an “invisible judgment day.” In other words, if you weren’t saved then, you’re going to be in a lot of trouble come Oct. 21.

So far, no Seattle-area “rapture day” parties are planned for that date. Earlier this year, a a local atheist group planned a party to mark the end of Camping’s “countdown to backpedaling.”
Here’s the message Camping is putting out on the website for his Family Radio organization:

Thus we can be sure that the whole world, with the exception of those who are presently saved (the elect), are under the judgment of God, and will be annihilated together with the whole physical world on October 21, 2011, on the last day of the present five months period. On that day the true believers (the elect) will be raptured. We must remember that only God knows who His elect are that He saved prior to May 21.

More recently, he told followers in a recorded message:

I do believe that we’re getting very near the very end…. If [God] had not kept us from knowing everything that we didn’t know, we would not have been able to be used of Him to bring about the tremendous event that occurred on May 21 of this year, and which probably will be finished out on October 21, that’s coming very shortly. That looks like it will be at this point, it looks like it will be the final end of everything.

Camping suffered a stroke shortly after his rapture predictions in May fell flat. He recently returned home to his California home where he is “continuing his recuperation in the care of his dear wife,” according to Family Radio.
For more on what happened earlier this year see this story: “Harold Camping mum about judgment day, atheists aren’t.”
Camping explained how he miscalculated earlier this year. Watch the explanation, courtesy of the Associated Press.

http://blog.seattlepi.com/thebigblog...rapture-again/

**Omniyoji** · 2011-10-15 17:10

mmm que la chingada...

**Guitarman** · 2011-10-15 17:12

Damn blizzcon, causing the end of the world and shit.

Celeste · 2011-10-16 05:11

I'll play REM's awesome song when the clock strikes October 21st. I will, of course, shit bricks if the world does end. In fact, we shall all be shitting bricks.

**Cail** · 2011-10-16 06:11

He's gotta be right this time, right?! i mean, hes only been wrong at least 2 other times!

Celeste · 2011-10-16 08:59

Originally Posted by Cail

He's gotta be right this time, right?! i mean, hes only been wrong at least 2 other times!

IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT, AHHH.

**Cloudius** · 2011-10-16 10:54

Originally Posted by clobetasol

Harold Camping predicts Oct. 21 rapture — again

http://blog.seattlepi.com/thebigblog...rapture-again/

At least I get to enjoy my 24th bday!

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