Miss Piggy's Grocery Store Checkout Headlines

[archibaldcrane]

Who gives a shit how much sex your coworkers have lol

The jelly in here is over 9000

[kuronosan]

So...it's ok to be the office slut because you gotta do you, amirite? I shoulda jumped on this train awhile ago. BRB, sexing up my coworkers.

I didn't say anything about okay or not okay.

Jelly jelly.

[Salodin]

If you remembered how hawt his closet was you'd be jelly too.

[Anoat]

http://www.sacurrent.com/Blogs/archi...y-madison-user
http://www.buzzfeed.com/stephaniemcn...oun#.ox1v33Owo

TL;DR = Viral video couple uses fame to espouse Christian values la la la, tries to make a video where their 5 year old bashes gays but the kid doesn't play along, goes even more viral with cute pregnancy announcement video, three days later they announce sad "we had a miscarriage video", next day dad quits his job and tries to use internet fame to get his kids into Legoland for free (seriously), people start calling bullshit on the whole thing, family releases video criticizing their "haters", and then the coup de grace, the husband is on the leaked Ashley Madison list.

[archibaldcrane]

Man we're really scraping the bottom of the Ashley Madison barrel already? Disappointing.

[zoobernut]

Man we're really scraping the bottom of the Ashley Madison barrel already? Disappointing.

I would venture a guess that most people we would be interested to see on Ashley Madison are wealthy and famous enough they don't need help to find someone who will have an affair with them. Were you expecting someone of Tiger Woods caliber on there?

(Either that or the people like that are smart enough and have the resources to set up fake accounts so they don't get caught.)

[archibaldcrane]

Eh, people are dumb, especially when they think with their dicks. I mean, no politicians?

[Salodin]

You're assuming they use their real name.

My talk show was talking about this today and someone called saying they currently use it. Apparently, it's very common for people to not use their real name for obvious reasons. Also, in order to keep things like stalking from happening, they often travel very far for the hookup; I'm talking more than a hundred miles or even another state far.

[Emirii]

Something close to my home:

http://www.kiiitv.com/story/29875816...corpse-missing

Texas Police say Man 'Obsessed' with Woman, Corpse Missing

Posted: Aug 25, 2015 12:16 PM CDT
Updated: Aug 25, 2015 2:30 PM CDT


SAN ANTONIO (AP) - San Antonio police trying to find a woman's corpse stolen from a casket say a man "obsessed" with her was the last to leave her funeral.

A preliminary police report released Tuesday mentions the man amid the search for the body of 25-year-old Julie Mott.

Police declined to release the man's name or further details about him, saying he was not charged or arrested.

Mott had cystic fibrosis and died Aug. 8. Her funeral was Aug. 15 at Mission Park Funeral Chapel North. The corpse theft was discovered the next day, with no signs of forced entry at the mortuary.

The police report says the man, who was invited to the service, was "obsessed with calling and texting" Mott.

Police redacted his name from the report released to the media.

I guess I can think of some things a sick person could do with an embalmed body for a lengthy period of time for some weird satisfaction, but toting around someone you love? Its kinda creepy.

[Byrthnoth]

Something close to my home:

http://www.kiiitv.com/story/29875816...corpse-missing



I guess I can think of some things a sick person could do with an embalmed body for a lengthy period of time for some weird satisfaction, but toting around someone you love? Its kinda creepy.

That you, Ryan?

[Aksannyi]

That you, Ryan?

I expected this but I still loled.

[Tokitoki]

Reporters for a CBS affiliate shot and killed during live broadcast in Virginia.

TV Journalists Fatally Shot During An On-Air Attack

[tyven]

Reporters for a CBS affiliate shot and killed during live broadcast in Virginia.

TV Journalists Fatally Shot During An On-Air Attack

"Second Amendment Outguns First in Area Standoff" - thank you based Gawker comment section

[Tokitoki]

"Second Amendment Outguns First in Area Standoff" - thank you based Gawker comment section

I can't even find the comment section... Not surprised, though. NY Post is pretty terrible in general, but they had the video.

[Tokitoki]

New video that he shot...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5E6Z...e_gdata_player

[archibaldcrane]

Insane.

[Kerberoz]

http://www.kiiitv.com/story/29875816...corpse-missing

Register to see the NSFW content

[notorious bum]

Germany trying to be the best bros they can possibly be.

Berlin couple launches website matching refugees with roommates in Germany, Austria http://dlvr.it/C13m8d

[Melena]

Teen decides to take selfies of himself with a gun he found. Blows his fucking head off in the process.

http://www.cnn.com/2015/09/02/us/man...ing/index.html

[Kyreth]

Teen decides to take selfies of himself with a gun he found. Blows his fucking head off in the process.

http://www.cnn.com/2015/09/02/us/man...ing/index.html

Darwin award achieved.