Miss Piggy's Grocery Store Checkout Headlines

**Brill Weave** · 2013-01-19 18:47

Love the old man running in with his shoe.

**Fairy-Killer** · 2013-01-19 18:51

Originally Posted by Brill Weave

Love the old man running in with his shoe.

You are as bad as Feiwong says you are.

**Fievel** · 2013-01-19 19:11

I assume the gun jammed? Really is lucky as shit

**Tricen** · 2013-01-19 22:08

The news I watched said it was a gas gun or some shit? I dunno

**Guitarman** · 2013-01-19 22:56

love how the old dudes beat his shit in. deserved it.

**Howie Roary** · 2013-01-19 23:53

his daughter?

**NotGreyheim** · 2013-01-20 21:58

Sounded like the crowd was chanting "FINISH HIM!" while the guy got the everliving shit beaten out of him. Got a good chuckle out of that.

**Cyn** · 2013-01-21 03:16

Originally Posted by Howie Roary

his daughter?

Annie Clark?

**Brill Weave** · 2013-01-21 10:38

Originally Posted by Fairy-Killer

You are as bad as Feiwong says you are.

**Xno Kappa** · 2013-01-21 17:37

Video was taken down.

**Guitarman** · 2013-01-21 17:41

**6souls** · 2013-01-22 01:01

On Thursday night at 9:30 p.m., the Dodge County Sheriff Dept. responded to Silk Exotic in Juneau for a report of a fight. Upon arrival authorities discovered two dancers, ages 19 and 23, got into a physical fight on stage. The fight was over one dollar! A customer was trying to give the dollar to one of the dancers but the other took exception to it and felt she had "earned" that dollar.

Both fell to the floor, punched and slapped each other, and then each pulled out some hair from the others head, and one was even pregnant. The fight had to be broke up by other dancers and customers. Neither of the girls required immediate medical attention and both were citing disorderly conduct - so now it will cost each of them $250.

“I was surprised by this as we seldom receive calls for service from this business, this is a rare exception,” stated Sheriff Todd Nehls.

Two dancers at an exotic club in Juneau have been cited after they allegedly brawled over a dollar bill.

A Post-Crescent of Appleton report says one of the women is pregnant.

Dodge County deputies say they were called to Silk Exotic last week to break up a fight. They say it started when a customer tried to give a dollar to one of the dancers but the other dancer took it.

The sheriff's report says both women began to brawl. They tussled on the floor, punching, slapping and pulling each other's hair. Other dancers and customers separated the two.

Both women were cited for disorderly conduct.

http://www.nbc15.com/news/headlines/...187493651.html
http://www.silkexotic.com/juneau.php
https://www.google.com/search?q=Silk...88%3B600%3B399

**Cyn** · 2013-01-22 02:14

Classy.

**Xantavia** · 2013-01-22 03:14

The sheriff's report says both women began to brawl. They tussled on the floor, punching, slapping and pulling each other's hair. Other dancers and customers separated the two.

Gotta be fake. There is no way customers in a strip club would break up a cat fight instead of throwing more dollars at the dancers.

**Elestial** · 2013-01-22 12:59

http://www.newser.com/story/161386/p...thal-baby.html

"(Newser) – A Harvard professor has hatched a plan to bring back the Neanderthals—but he needs an "adventurous" female volunteer to deliver a knuckle-dragging bundle of joy. George Church, a geneticist who helped pioneer the Human Genome Project, says it is now possible to create artificial Neanderthal DNA from bone samples, put the DNA into stem cells, inject those cells into an embryo, and then implant into a woman willing to give birth to a Neanderthal baby, the Independent reports.

"It depends on a hell of a lot of things, but I think it can be done," the professor, who says the plan would require "extremely adventurous female human" to serve as a surrogate mother, tells der Spiegel. The benefits of bringing back our long-extinct relatives include the fact that they may prove to be more intelligent than modern humans, and "when the time comes to deal with an epidemic or getting off the planet or whatever, it's conceivable that their way of thinking could be beneficial," the professor says."

Edit: adding an article from my local newspaper, since it's longer:

http://www.ottawacitizen.com/health/...560/story.html

"A Harvard scientist has said it would be possible to clone a Neanderthal baby from ancient DNA if he could find a woman willing to act as a surrogate.

The process would not be legal in many countries and would involve using DNA extracted from fossils.

George Church, a genetics professor of Harvard School of Medicine, said that the process was possible and that far from being brutal and primitive, Neanderthals were intelligent beings.

They are believed to be one of the ancestors of modern man and became extinct 33,000 years ago. He added that altering the human genome could also provide the answers to curing diseases such as cancer and HIV, and hold the key to living to 120.

He told Der Spiegel, the German magazine: “I have already managed to attract enough DNA from fossil bones to reconstruct the DNA of the human species largely extinct. Now I need an adventurous female human.”

The professor claims that he could introduce parts of the Neanderthal genome to human stem cells and clone them to create a fetus that could then be implanted in a woman.

Prof Church helped start the Human Genome Project that mapped human DNA and is well respected in the field. His comments will surprise most geneticists who believe that cloning humans is unacceptable. It is illegal in Britain.

Prof Church said: “We can clone all kinds of mammals, so it’s very likely that we could clone a human. Why shouldn’t we be able to do so?”

He added: “Neanderthals might think differently than we do. We know that they had a larger cranial size. They could even be more intelligent than us.

“When the time comes to deal with an epidemic or getting off the planet or whatever, it’s conceivable that their way of thinking could be beneficial. They could maybe even create a new neo-Neanderthal culture and become a political force. The main goal is to increase diversity. The one thing that is bad for society is low diversity.”

Prof Church said the technique would involve artificially creating DNA from fossilized material and introducing this into human stem cell lines.

He discusses his idea in his latest book, Regenesis: How Synthetic Biology Will Reinvent Nature and Ourselves.

He rules out recreating older human ancestors or dinosaurs, as was the subject of the Jurassic Park films, because the age limit of useful DNA is about one million years, he said.

He told the magazine: “One of the things to do is to engineer our cells so that they have a lower probability of cancer.

“And then once we have a lower probability of cancer, you can crank up their self-renewal properties, so that they have a lower probability of senescence [aging].”"

**Brill Weave** · 2013-01-22 13:05

Seems awful Jurassic Parky

**Byrd** · 2013-01-22 14:27

Woman murders boyfriend by smothering him to death with her breasts.

**Fairy-Killer** · 2013-01-22 15:01

Originally Posted by Byrd

Woman murders boyfriend by smothering him to death with her breasts.

The only way to die happy.

**Guitarman** · 2013-01-22 15:02

Not a bad way to go, really.

**Ragnus** · 2013-01-22 15:12

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.ph...arshmallowHell

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