Re5ident Evil: Retribution (September 14, 2012)

[Fairy-Killer]

No. I'm fine with them not following the games cause it'd be some boring ass movies... However, I do think there could be more "scary" parts in them and less "wtf, this doesn't even make sense". But... I think my main complaint with them is that they brought Resident Evil into a new light as an action series which it wasn't. This affected the games as the new fans coming in wanted an action game and Capcom started seeing dollar signs. So basically, they ruined my survival horror game. Now I'm just stuck with the ever stagnant Silent Hill.

[ronin sparthos]

Okay, and what makes you hate them? I'm generally curious as to how people hate this series so much... Is it because it doesn't follow the games 100%?

The RE series just aren't good, entertaining movies from my point of view. They don't have memorable characters or oneliners like an older Arnie, JCVD or Sly action vehicle, the action is forgettable, the storyline is throwaway and overall everything stacks up as mediocre. I love bad movies as much as I like really good movies but something in the middle like RE3/4? Complete flatline.

A series like the Transporter by all stretches of the imagination is pretty corny and over the top silly in the action department but at least I'll be entertained watching Jason Statham acting like a badass for 90mins because the series doesn't take itself serious and is designed to be fun and exciting.

RE bills itself as having zombies and survival horror but it's really just a pretty lame attempt at an action movie and the zombies just happen to be there to justify slapping the Resident Evil title on it. I don't even care the series is based off the games (which weren't that good IMO) but the RE flicks I've seen just never delivered on being anything outside mediocre movies that aren't even charming for being 'bad'.

I'd rather watch Super Mario Bros simply because of the sheer entertainment value of watching so many things go wrong on screen at once.

[Kerberoz]

Need to break out the fanboy bingo card and check off "Let's see you do better!" "Why can't you just have fun!" "I'm not mad ahahaha just typing in stream of consciousness lol for no ahahah reason not because I'm withholding raaaaage!" "You're just a disgruntled fan of the book/game/play/older film!" and "Sheeple!" but that last one might be the free space...

I think the games are pretty much shit. Grew out of them a decade ago. Horrible writing and not survival (except maybe the earlier ones on hard mode, there's no need to avoid fights) or horror (replacing standard mooks with zombies/monsters does not equal horror). They're brilliant compared to the movies, though.

The writing is fanfiction quality. The main character is not just a self-insert, but something much, much worse: a wife-insert. While a normal self-insert is bad enough, this is taken to new levels by combining masturbatory fantasy with the literary qualities of a love-letter written to a sixth-grade crush. Every single scene is either glorifying Wifey or setting up other characters to be killed and/or rescued by her later. There is no grasp of continuity, and even playing every tired cliche involving memory and virtual reality (and no, invoking probably the most common non-Biblical allusion in all of Western culture does not give free reign to ignore continuity; Carroll was actually clever about it) and every other fanfiction-favorite method of retconning still fails to make it sensical. The action scenes are hilariously lame... 100lb girl kung-fu fighting a tank of a monster and then defeating it with the Power of Heart (I assume, it's hard to tell with her one expression) is just hilarious.

Anyway, these movies are really, really, really fun to hate.

"It's just generic disposable action flick" is both downright wrong (there are hundreds of mindless action flicks that can be enjoyed with just a bottle-in-front-o-me while these ones require a frontal-lobotomy) and doesn't explain why you feel the need to defend it. If bashing movies you don't like on the internet is sad, then whiteknighting movies you like is downright pathetic. Criticism can be constructive; the same can't be said of praise.

[Cleverness]

Okay, and what makes you hate them? I'm generally curious as to how people hate this series so much... Is it because it doesn't follow the games 100%?

Every recent RE movie thread, including this one, pretty much devolves to "the movies overall are bad after 1/2/etc but I can't stop watching it", and then you ask why people don't like it? Still dumb Draylo, still dumb. The Transformer movies were terrible MOVIES but they were still successful because there is a current demographic that will just pay to watch random action with no important plot + character development to tie them together.

RE is sort of the same way, except it went from a sorta serious movie about surviving zombie hordes to Alice being godmode and then having cheesy action sequences(the scene in the 3rd movie where the Super Zombies are attacking and Alice goes 'offline' for abit was actually great since you had normal people dealing with zombie attacks and it was a refreshing change of pace from the normal stuff). Ronin makes a good point at how it comes off cheesy due to the fact that it, at 1 point, was supposed to be taken seriously. Noone gets on Shaun of the Deads case for how over the top cheesy it is because it was written that way from the start.

So Draylo, before you think that peoples opinions about the movie are based only on that RLM review, go read all the posts in this thread + the previous where people repeat the same thing as to why they aren't good movies. You won't look so stupid if you do that instead of immediately raging like you did in your first response to it. BTW if Draylo actually posts this

I really enjoyed this movie, they did a great job. The story wasn't the greatest but its a damn action movie and it fulfilled that role perfectly.

you know the movie is actually very terrible then.

[Draylo]

Nice opinion man

[ronin sparthos]

Nice opinion man

No one's passed these opinions off as facts.

You're free to like RE and I'm free to tell you why I think this series makes Kung Fu Panda seem like cinematic genius.

[Cleverness]

Yo if you hate on Kung Fu Panda we might have to throw down. Seriously though;

Those guys are fucking idiots. I love how over half the people on these forums can't form their own opinions about movies without consulting reviews.

Good I'm glad you can join on the bandwagon and hate something because its popular I guess? I guess the simple action films in the past were the bestest ever but something like this movie is a sin. All these people who look to those guys in that video as if their words were sacred, make me laugh. They just remind me of these sad idiots that think they know how the movie should go yet couldn't write a script worth a damn if they were asked to prove it ahahaha.

Surprised you got this mad over an internet review about a 10 year old movie series where everyone has had time to pick apart what's wrong with it. So mad.

[Draylo]

I like how you seem to think I'm mad. I could care less if a couple of geekazoids on the internet dislike a successful movie series due to dumb reviews from even bigger geeks.

No one's passed these opinions off as facts.

You're free to like RE and I'm free to tell you why I think this series makes Kung Fu Panda seem like cinematic genius.

Kerberoz's post comes off that way.

[Cleverness]

I like how you seem to think I'm mad. I could care less if a couple of geekazoids on the internet dislike a successful movie series due to dumb reviews from even bigger geeks.

Yea you're definitely not mad.

[Draylo]

Yeah I guess that means I'm mad eh? I guess that would make you mad then too for throwing the word idiot around.

[Cleverness]

Actually no since you've made it well known across several forums + FF11 that you're actually an idiot, different story there. It's ok though Draylo, I'd be annoyed too if I had tastes like yours. How does it feel knowing Resident Evil: Degeneration still remains as the best RE movie released because it was actually sorta well written as opposed to this one. Live action movies took the universe and fucked it up while Degeneration just based it off the games but the script had several magnitudes more thought put into it in comparison. Oh wait, "HERP DERP ACTION". Right.

[Draylo]

Actually no since you've made it well known across several forums + FF11 that you're actually an idiot, different story there. It's ok though Draylo, I'd be annoyed too if I had tastes like yours. How does it feel knowing Resident Evil: Degeneration still remains as the best RE movie released because it was actually sorta well written as opposed to this one. Live action movies took the universe and fucked it up while Degeneration just based it off the games but the script had several magnitudes more thought put into it in comparison. Oh wait, "HERP DERP ACTION". Right.

So I'm an idiot because I don't agree with your opinion and I like something you don't. You seem to be the one that is highly mad. Let me throw the baseless insult out there too, you're an idiot as well.

[Cleverness]

So I'm an idiot because I don't agree with your opinion and I like something you don't.

Good I'm glad you can join on the bandwagon and hate something because its popular I guess? I guess the simple action films in the past were the bestest ever but something like this movie is a sin. All these people who look to those guys in that video as if their words were sacred, make me laugh. They just remind me of these sad idiots that think they know how the movie should go yet couldn't write a script worth a damn if they were asked to prove it ahahaha.

So Draylo, before you think that peoples opinions about the movie are based only on that RLM review, go read all the posts in this thread + the previous where people repeat the same thing as to why they aren't good movies. You won't look so stupid if you do that instead of immediately raging like you did in your first response to it.

Yea that's clearly why I made that comment at you, nothing to do with how you tried to dismiss someones criticism as "bandwagoning" when the same opinion has been reiterated by people for years just on BG alone as it has persisted through each movie. So dumb, so dumb.

[Draylo]

Mostly the same people that come into these with their opinions they think are facts and their hipster hatred for anything popular.

[Kerberoz]

Qualitative judgements are always opinion and only a fool would assume otherwise and expect that to be spelled out for them. Keep trying to prove you aren't mad by getting madder, though. Delicious fremdscham.

[Draylo]

K I guess we can keep posting the back and forth, I'm not mad you're mad. You should read your post over again and tell me that isn't meant to come across as fact when you're countering any opinion I had and saying they were wrong. You can state your opinion in response to my question of why people hate this (as if I read every RE thread about these movies, I know most of them are bitch fests like this.) without resorting to that.

[Cleverness]

You can be mad at the tone of his post but it was justified since his first paragraph is pointing out how stupid your "sad idiots that think they know how the movie should go yet couldn't write a script worth a damn if they were asked to prove it ahahaha" comment was. The only reason it's a back and forth is because you saw the video and raged and made a bunch of stupid comments to attempt to retort it, and after people pointed it out you refuse to admit you actually said something stupid. If you like the movie then whatever, people like different things. If you want to argue someones opinion who didn't like it you are welcome to do so provided you make a good argument. When you're seething with rage and make generic incorrect comments on those opinions with no sort of thought behind it like the script comment, expect to receive similar comments poking fun at how wrong you are.

[Draylo]

The video itself was stupid as it can get, three fat geekazoids laughing like animals for 3m over a fight scene.

[Rhyis.]

Draylo liked the new Star Wars movies. Nothing more needs to be said here.

[Rhyis.]

Also I saw this movie and it was bad... And I like cheesy dumbed-down action movies. This did not fulfill that quota whatsoever.