Girlfriend problems...

[Jeryhn]

She came to you crying and upset over developing slight feelings for another man?

No, she's already slept with the guy. Recommend you to move on.

[Rhyis.]

inorite?

Men know what they want by the age of 13.


My answer is: tell her you care about her, but if she's in the middle somewhere you've got to move on for now. Sitting around waiting for somebody who isn't where you're at in a relationship is just painful.

[Syntex]

there are a million different directions this could go. you guys are jumping to conclusions about what kind of person she is, what shes done, how mature she is, if shes a "bitch," etc., when you know absolutely none of this. so what if she got emotional...GROUND BREAKING DISCOVERY, chicks get emotional! who knew?! she could be on a bad period, could of had a shitty day and overreacted, who the hell knows. i know who doesnt though: everyone in this thread.

you dont end a relationship with someone you care about just because they were honest & open with you about something. at least give it more than 20 minutes before jumping to a decision for christs sake. when she gets home later she could have figured all this out and you just look & feel like a total moron. at least have some face to face conversation.

This man has a point.

Most of you are assuming she is immature, overreacting and just running to the first guy she sees.

She is quite mature for her age(she is 23 I'm 24) and this is the first time it has happened to her. She was in a 3 year relationship which ended about a year ago and never had this come up. I am 99% sure she hasn't fucked the guy or anything because its happened to her and she made it a point to never do it to someone. 6 months is nothing in the scheme of things but to break it off cold like some of you are suggesting is not the best choice.

I think islader said it pretty well...

This sounds like her problem. Don't entertain it. Either she's committed to be with you or she isn't; there isn't room in a relationship for "but I kinda feel something for this other person". Tell her what you want (which is, I'm assuming, to be in a relationship with her), and tell her what you feel for her. Tell her to figure out what she wants to do, because no one else can do it for her. This is really an open and shut situation, because dragging out "I don't know what to doooo!" is insulting to all parties involved.

The conversation doesn't have to be presented as an ultimatum, but it's going to be one in essence. If you've represented yourself, and the relationship well, there isn't anything else you should have to do. If she wants to chase after ever ovary flutter, then she probably isn't ready to be in a grown-up relationship.

She doesn't feel good about the situation at all because it would mean giving up everything we have together(yea 6 months is nothing, I got the memo) but not all relationships that take this turn end up in breaking up, for all I know it could strengthen it but I'll find out in about 30 minutes when she gets out of class.

I'll probably tell her she needs to get her shit straight because most of you are right, if this is something that happens on a regular basis then its time to move on and deal with someone who wants me and not every guy who might be better. There will always be a better/smarter/sexier/richer potential husband/wife out there but part of a relationship is about being who you're with and not about trading up every chance you get.

I'll give her a week if things go in that direction but I'm hoping it doesn't. Also BG is a good place to ask about shit like this because unlike 98% of the forums on the web this one only has a handful of mouth breathers and has more people along with a broader age group that know shit then anywhere else, just need to not listen to EVERY post as gospel, eat the meat spit out the bone ect.

I'll update when I get back.

[Fhqwghads]

She's straying, dump her and move on, save yourself 6 months of yelling, pain, and heartbreak

Your answer in less than 10 posts.

[quannum]

She came to you crying and upset over developing slight feelings for another man?

No, she's already slept with the guy. Recommend you to move on.

we have a winner. she's already taking daily deep dickings from her "friend"

why doesn't anyone take biz markies advice anymore?

[Headspace]

bitches aint shit

[Drex]

She already cheated on you. Now she's trying to justify it to herself. Sorry for your loss!

[FallingHigher]

She came to you crying and upset over developing slight feelings for another man?

No, she's already slept with the guy. Recommend you to move on.

Pretty much this. Either she's feeling mega-guilty and is looking to release her remorse to you in a way that doesn't majorly hurt you emotionally, or she's incredibly clever.

Edit: Inb4 HAcoreRD.

Goddammit.

[Gredival]

Can only be loyal to one person. If it's not you, then part ways now.

[Jeryhn]

we have a winner. she's already taking daily deep dickings from her "friend"

And if she isn't, which she probably is but anyway, when she's at home all alone, she's fapping to the thought of being with him.

Should think about that OP.

[Ragnell]

Hoes and tricks

[Ragnell]

But seriously, give the ultimatium, Him or you, Don't give her time to choose, and make the bitch off everything with the nigga, fuck him up if you have to, if she hesitates, drop the bitch, seriously

Miz and Auntie does work, beeldat

[bender1077]

Got 99 problems but a bitch ain't 1 - 98???

[Ragnell]

no, he has 100 problems now

[quannum]

he does have feelings for her

is this the first you've heard that he has feelings for her? if yes, she's telling you that they have feelings for each other

but respects our relationship which is now going on 6 months. He hasn't made any moves or anything

this is bs, learn to detect it.

but she has started to develop feelings for him and doesn't know what to do hence why she called me in tears.

she's crying to you because she doesn't know what to do? you believe that?

another note that you're probably missing is that chicks love the 'forbidden love' angle. and in this particular story you are whats keeping this fated love from blooming. your relationship is already over man, condolences.

[Eleven19]

I'm with Gredival, I think that's the easiest breakdown personally.

In a committed relationship I think it really has to be either all in, or fold. When you start having trouble like this, where either your girl has feelings for someone or you yourself have feelings for another girl.. I mean if you're gunna try to drag that out over any substantial length of time you're going to get yourself in a constant state of depression.

I've been on the receiving end of that situation. Trying to save a relationship when your gf is thinkin about someone else is going to hurt you.

Unfortunately, ultimatum sounds like the best course of action. Neither of you will be happy in a relationship if she doesn't make up her mind and continues to have this guy as a 'friend'. I really do wish you luck with whatever happens, this kind of situation blows.

[LinktheDeme]

This man has a point.

Most of you are assuming she is immature, overreacting and just running to the first guy she sees.

broader age group that know shit then anywhere else, just need to not listen to EVERY post as gospel, eat the meat spit out the bone ect.

These two line slightly irriatate me on a few regards. I don't want you to be disregarding the extreme of someone's post because it conflicts with your expectations of what you want people to be posting. You have to keep an open mind in all situations because generally the "mouth breathers" are just people representing the extremes or either the actual situation but posting it in such a manner to seem extreme in an attempt to be "cool".

I've been in your fair share of expectations and I used to make the same assessments (hell i probably will again if im blinded by the "love goggles" what i like to call them) because you get in to the tendency where you start developing EXCEPTIONS and you classify the person you like as having more exceptions than she really has. The fact is you have been together 6 months you do not know for sure if she really has not had this happen to her before as you have not even been with her remotely long enough to get an idea of the "real person". Like someone else said in a different topic the "real person" normally doesn't come out until around marriage because one person is always going to want to make things work out for that relationship and go completely against their values and norms in some situations.(you seem like that person right now, on occasion it is both people but at younger ages this is less likely)

I do agree the talking with the person is the best way to go. In all honesty face to face is the best way because you can start to pick up on non verbal communication to commitment and if she actually did anything that she is not willing to verbally communicate to you. However when you go about this route you can't just demand things you have to actually sound concerned rather than angry otherwise she probably won't really want to cooperate and you'll just be pushing her farther away. However, like Jeri said it is completely unrealistic for a girl to breakdown in tears over developing slight emotions unless she has done something she feels may violate the terms of your relationship(This isn't limited to sex, some people can build up the guilt and emotion over just getting closer to another. Although in this case it would be more likely that someone builds up the guilt after the relationship has had far more time to develop.) Lastly, if she is calling you in tears about developing feelings 6 months in to the relationship, imagine how your relationship will be in 5 years. Is this someone you think that will take you serious as a boyfriend to not let this happen again?

tldr: Self assess to make sure your ideology is ok with an open mind removing the "love goggles" (they kinda look like beer goggles except you're dating that fat bitch)

[Dimmauk]

Id keylogger her first. If you love her, set her free.

[Lordender]

all men want is beer, college/NFL football, chicken wings, sex, video games, SOME GOD DAMN SILENCE DURING FOOTBALL!

its really that simple, mystery unlocked, 10billion internets won.

you probably should move on, it seems like that situation has drama all over it and you're only six months in. She sounds like she wants her cake and eat it too etc.

[Franzer]

Call that dude out and compare dicks