women of spam and women who ocassionally browse spam

[Callisto]

I'd definitely have a lesbian hookup w/ them if I was a woman

[Callisto]

hell I'd do it as a man right now

[Tetronimo]

Art thou satisfied, Kuya, or would you like another female's opinion as well also in addition too?

[Callisto]

for you we should be more specific: do my gundamz make you want to make sweet sweet bonerjamz with me?

[Kuya]

Art thou satisfied, Kuya, or would you like another female's opinion as well also in addition too?

Yes, as many women should comment on the same questions i asked isladar. You can do it here (so other guys can learn something too) or you can do it in pms.

[Kuya]

You can even discuss what isladar said if you want to have a discussion amongst yourselves.

[Alleya]

You can even kiss her. I mean, if you want. Touch her hair. It's no big deal. No one's judging if you just wanna get a little close.

[Ivve]

i agree with isla about not scheduling sex, but at the same time if your partner has a lower sex drive than you do, shit gets really annoying to deal with after a while.

[Shiroikage]

but no one has a higher sex drive than men

[isladar]

No, it's fine, you just have to get my responses between me making dinner and checking the Habs-Bruins game.

Okay, last two questions then:

What is your opinion on lesbianism/bisexuality for women? Do you consider yourself capable of ever being sexually attracted to women (if you aren't already)? Are you comfortable with being able to recognize and comment on the beauty(and sensuality/sexyness) of other women? Are you comfortable around lesbian women or bisexual women (do you get uncomfortable with the idea of them being in the same bathroom with you and somehow checking you out)? What do you perceive as the opinion of other women on this? (you can speak in general or refer to specific conversations)

This is something I'm trying to articulate as I go, so bear with me. I think there is a difference between the lesbian/bisexuality of young women and older women. I think younger women are still trying, in many cases, to explore their sexuality in a safe way. In my experience, this has been the case with most young women who've professed lesbianism to me. There are others who I've met who are definitively attracted to women, and those are the ones who I believe will love women as they get older.

I have no issue commenting on / appreciating the attractiveness of women. Per my previous example, as often as I will notice an attractive man, I will notice / make note of an attractive woman. I have no difficulty or issue doing so. The feminine aesthetic is almost exclusively associated with beauty, so no, I have no issue or conflict in recognizing it. I have been attracted to women insofar as I've had very close relationships with girlfriends, but again, any fluttering of physical closeness was dependent upon the fact that it was an emotionally close relationship to begin with. I am comfortable around lesbian / bisexual women, and have been approached by them before. It is as flattering (or annoying) as being approached by a man.

I believe there is the same sort of assumption of safety for other women with regards to this; I think women are more likely to assume that lesbianism is 'just a thing' or phase or what have you, which I imagine must be desperately difficult to a woman who truly desires other women. A lesbian acquaintance of mine spoke of how often straight women would entertain flirting, or even more, just to experiment or feel naughty or what have you, and drop their lesbian partner at the first sign of an interested man.

My appreciation of the male form is again, almost entirely dependent upon their relationship to me. Callisto and I know each other in real life, and while he's a good looking guy, there is more sexual tension between Laurel and Hardy than between us. I do not see him as a sexual person, he's my friend. Until a relationship has proceeded to a deep emotional interaction, I do not put a sexual template over men that I interact with. Masculine beauty is expressed in masculine personality to me; so a chiseled, strong-jawed Adonis on the street would mean less than nothing compared to a slightly out of shape man that I was in love with. I don't know that I'll list things about my partner that I find physically attractive; there's a lot of them, and they're mine.

Second, how do you feel about the male physique (or what part of it do you find revolting)? What in men do you like or find sexy (assuming you make the distinction)? Would you say you're more visual (you like images of men the most), more contextual (directed towards actions) or perhaps you're more into dialogue (sexy speech, erotic literature)? Do you watch pornography? If so, what sort of pornographies do you prefer (straight porn, lesbian porn, gay porn) and what do you like about it? Does watching women in straight porn (assuming you watch it) make you uncomfortable (i've heard that some women can't help but identify with the women in straight porn, and thus they are made uncomfortable by what they perceive as the latent misogyny in the act, so they either prefer gay porn or watch no porn at all)? Finally, same as above, how do you think other women feel about this? Contrast it or compare it your own feelings/thoughts on this.

Thank you again for answering, and also if you would rather answer in pms, this is fine too (sorry for not mentioning it earlier)

I have read erotic literature, and prefer the opportunity to formulate my own visuals to what I'm reading, rather than being presented with someone elses approximation of what constitutes 'sexy'. I know that there has been a lot written about how women dislike 'image' porn (whether video or pictures), I would postulate that the discomfort or dislike comes from the fact that there's nothing left to imagine. The scene in some horrible hokey romance where the hero finally is able to take hold of the heroine's hand, fade to black, leaves everything to the mind, and I would hope most of us are more inventive than a porn director.

I would guess that other womens often stated distaste for pornography stems from the fact that it represents pretty much everything we're told sexuality shouldn't be like. Though I have female friends who enjoy pornography, and are open about such, I find there's a bit of tomboyishness to it, a sort of "Yeah I like sports and skin my knees and PORN!" Or it may be a genuine enjoyment, I'm not sure. I find porn unappealing, for one reason, because the sort of people who are willing to do pornography are not the sort of people I'd really like to watch coupling. I think it is also a matter that sex is a very private matter for me, and I would guess, for most women. Skirting the socio-cultural issues of protestant america's fear of sex, I think physicality is something between two people. You can't market my sexuality to me, and it's awkward when people attempt to (i.e., pornography).

[Tetronimo]

Aw shit, responding from my phone is the worst idea ever. I'll get back to this from my computer.

Calli you should test that theory by sending me pics of your gundams and describing them in detail.

[Kuya]

No, it's fine, you just have to get my responses between me making dinner and checking the Habs-Bruins game.



This is something I'm trying to articulate as I go, so bear with me. I think there is a difference between the lesbian/bisexuality of young women and older women. I think younger women are still trying, in many cases, to explore their sexuality in a safe way. In my experience, this has been the case with most young women who've professed lesbianism to me. There are others who I've met who are definitively attracted to women, and those are the ones who I believe will love women as they get older.

I have no issue commenting on / appreciating the attractiveness of women. Per my previous example, as often as I will notice an attractive man, I will notice / make note of an attractive woman. I have no difficulty or issue doing so. The feminine aesthetic is almost exclusively associated with beauty, so no, I have no issue or conflict in recognizing it. I have been attracted to women insofar as I've had very close relationships with girlfriends, but again, any fluttering of physical closeness was dependent upon the fact that it was an emotionally close relationship to begin with. I am comfortable around lesbian / bisexual women, and have been approached by them before. It is as flattering (or annoying) as being approached by a man.

I believe there is the same sort of assumption of safety for other women with regards to this; I think women are more likely to assume that lesbianism is 'just a thing' or phase or what have you, which I imagine must be desperately difficult to a woman who truly desires other women. A lesbian acquaintance of mine spoke of how often straight women would entertain flirting, or even more, just to experiment or feel naughty or what have you, and drop their lesbian partner at the first sign of an interested man.

My appreciation of the male form is again, almost entirely dependent upon their relationship to me. Callisto and I know each other in real life, and while he's a good looking guy, there is more sexual tension between Laurel and Hardy than between us. I do not see him as a sexual person, he's my friend. Until a relationship has proceeded to a deep emotional interaction, I do not put a sexual template over men that I interact with. Masculine beauty is expressed in masculine personality to me; so a chiseled, strong-jawed Adonis on the street would mean less than nothing compared to a slightly out of shape man that I was in love with. I don't know that I'll list things about my partner that I find physically attractive; there's a lot of them, and they're mine.



I have read erotic literature, and prefer the opportunity to formulate my own visuals to what I'm reading, rather than being presented with someone elses approximation of what constitutes 'sexy'. I know that there has been a lot written about how women dislike 'image' porn (whether video or pictures), I would postulate that the discomfort or dislike comes from the fact that there's nothing left to imagine. The scene in some horrible hokey romance where the hero finally is able to take hold of the heroine's hand, fade to black, leaves everything to the mind, and I would hope most of us are more inventive than a porn director.

I would guess that other womens often stated distaste for pornography stems from the fact that it represents pretty much everything we're told sexuality shouldn't be like. Though I have female friends who enjoy pornography, and are open about such, I find there's a bit of tomboyishness to it, a sort of "Yeah I like sports and skin my knees and PORN!" Or it may be a genuine enjoyment, I'm not sure. I find porn unappealing, for one reason, because the sort of people who are willing to do pornography are not the sort of people I'd really like to watch coupling. I think it is also a matter that sex is a very private matter for me, and I would guess, for most women. Skirting the socio-cultural issues of protestant america's fear of sex, I think physicality is something between two people. You can't market my sexuality to me, and it's awkward when people attempt to (i.e., pornography).

Thanks! These were all very good responses. If you ever want to expand on anything or if anything occurs to you at some time, feel free to post it here or pm me. Or you can ask me questions on what exactly i'm doing here. Again, thanks for the answers they're a great help.

[Xajii]

Aw shit, responding from my phone is the worst idea ever. I'll get back to this from my computer.

Calli you should test that theory by sending me pics of your gundams and describing them in detail.

Oh yeah baby, it's got funnels out the ass.

[isladar]

I am interested in the hypothesis you're working under, as your questions were general enough that I kinda had to field as well as I could.

[Shiroikage]

what are you doing, kuya

[Kuya]

I am interested in the hypothesis you're working under, as your questions were general enough that I kinda had to field as well as I could.

Yea, it's no rigorous scientific research (though it might turn into that soon), at the moment it's some vague theorizing.

My current hypothesis is, essentially, that women have more differences between them when it comes to sexuality than men do. This is a pretty lazy hypothesis and it's hypothesis that can be summed up as "women are very different from eachother, so you can't generalize effectively". But this is the conclusion i've recently come to. To explain: i can't really remember what my opinion on female sexuality was before college, since i was probably more concerned with sticking my dick in their vaginas. At college i began to conclude that women really were just as sexual (defined in men's terms) as men but society was simply repressing their natural desires for all things sex. Yet this idea was a bit conflicting since the things i've heard women say were often so contradictory to what i believed, and i just asumed that the things they said were simply a result of their sexual repression, but at some point i realized that this position was too a priori and tautalogical in the sense that it justified itself:

If women say their sexuality is not what i say it is, it's because they are repressed prudes, and therefore what they say is irrelevant.

so instead i tried to take in what women say, and what i found was constant contradiction. A difficulty to generalize. Some would say that sex is relational and about emotinal attachment, yet others would tell me it's about pleasures, and others would tell me it's about satisfying the other. Women would say that they didn't like porn, yet others said that loved straight porn, others said that they found straight porn fake and preferred the genuineness of gay porn, others say they loved the gender role subvertion of gay porn, others said they preferred the sensuality of genuine lesbian porn. I found a lot of differences between what they wanted and how they thought things should be.

I found that straight men were always trying to find out that secret formula for dealing with women, but more often than not it tended to only describe a small few. For example, the argument that women don't know what they want and they just pursue bad boys over men who are actually good for them, but this only really described some women; so what was up with the rest?

So the explanation that i'm building for my hypothesis is that women enforce sexuality conformity to a lesser extent than men do, and this allows a larger variety in the way women express their sex and sexuality. I do this by contrasting discussions by straight men were i often found more agreement than disagreement, and where disagreement often ended up with those who's opinions were too different being denounced as unmasculine, effeminate, gay or just weird. I am hypothesizing that men permit less deviation in the way they express and discuss sex. Women may comment on how strange a fellow woman's tastes and ideas are, but they won't necessarily engage in open or violent rejection. They are less likely than men to call something unwomanly or unfeminine, but i am not saying they don't do this.

So basically again, my hypothesis is that women vary far greater in their expressions of sexuality than men do, because women enforce less homogeneity in terms of sexuality.

[isladar]

I would say that men express more homogeneity, but in reality are just as varied as you see women to be in their sexuality. I think you're right, men have their expressions far more curtailed (and perhaps women would too, if speaking of sex was more common a topic) by other men, but in practice, I would hesitate just as much to say "In my experience, men are [generalization]". It would be much more "Well so-and-so was like this, whereas such-and-such was much more as this, and on the third hand, &c."

[isladar]

It's kind of the issue of self-reporting, people want to represent themselves as best as possible.

[Kuya]

I would say that men express more homogeneity, but in reality are just as varied as you see women to be in their sexuality. I think you're right, men have their expressions far more curtailed (and perhaps women would too, if speaking of sex was more common a topic) by other men, but in practice, I would hesitate just as much to say "In my experience, men are [generalization]". It would be much more "Well so-and-so was like this, whereas such-and-such was much more as this, and on the third hand, &c."

Well yea, generalizations, but naturally we make said generalizations to make things more comprehensible. If human nature is such as that everyone is super different from eachother, then there is no way to fully understand people as a group or predict and solve problems.

With that said, perhaps we can say men are more homogenous in their expressions of their sexuality in public but it is not known whether men vary much more in the details of their sexuality in private. The same can be said of women, but again we would go back to what i said: women simply enforce conformity less than men do.

[Conrad]

I would say that men express more homogeneity, but in reality are just as varied as you see women to be in their sexuality. I think you're right, men have their expressions far more curtailed (and perhaps women would too, if speaking of sex was more common a topic) by other men, but in practice, I would hesitate just as much to say "In my experience, men are [generalization]". It would be much more "Well so-and-so was like this, whereas such-and-such was much more as this, and on the third hand, &c."

This was my thinking as well. I think men, however, have their sexuality suppressed and condensed into the physical aspect, while women have it condensed into the emotional. I share a lot of your views on sex despite being male, but if I were to admit them in front of other men I would be ridiculed or look at as unmasculine.