What Did Jesus Do Afer He Was Resurrected?

[Inactive]

After my resurrection I wanted to stay low key so I kept the miracles to a minimum ya know? Every now and then I'll come back through a normal human to respond to things such as this, but not too often. The Trailblazers/Mavericks game is a little stale right now so I thought i'd chime in

[Mizango]

I used to think that Jesus existed but that he was a normal man and that there was a lot of evidence supporting this. Recently, however, I've been reading that there is no evidence for the existence of Jesus except the Christian Bible and that wasn't even contemporary. His story is nice though, even if it is fake.

Pretty much. Also the Bible is the only source for the Exodus (Egypt nor any accompanying countries have this as ever happening wrf.jpg) the bible is also the only proof(s) of men living to be 900+ years old and that of men living inside a giant fish, while ignoring everything we know of digestion and oxygen levels inside the gullet of a fish. Golden boxes that will set you on fire if you look at it or touch it (how convienent ) its no wonder it has yet to be found or seen. Anyone unfortunate enough to do so has perished upon laying eyes on it!

Then again niggas were magical back then, so what do I know?

[Drex]

well, what would you do with a couple new holes in your hands?
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-6RWE6iEodP...-Yeah-meme.png

[Sylvrdragon]

The answer is obvious:

He complained about the lag. I mean seriously, fucking 3 day respawn? Shit is ridiculous.

[Tagus]

Obviously, first thing he did was banged his wife. I'll bet 90% of u haters are doing something with the fam for easter tho...

[Mizango]

Obviously, first thing he did was banged his wife. I'll bet 90% of u haters are doing something with the fam for easter tho...

But of course we are, that egg laying Rabbit is fucking pro.

[Mizango]

Fuck zombies though.

[Blarg]

men living inside a giant fish, while ignoring everything we know of digestion and oxygen levels inside the gullet of a fish

real christians don't believe he lived in a fish you fool. it was almost certainly a whale or shark

[Mizango]

I stand corrected sir Blag. Must have been a bad ass mofo to be able to punch his way through feet and feet of baleen to get to your new home.

[Tomiko]

Pretty much. Also the Bible is the only source for the Exodus (Egypt nor any accompanying countries have this as ever happening wrf.jpg) the bible is also the only proof(s) of men living to be 900+ years old and that of men living inside a giant fish, while ignoring everything we know of digestion and oxygen levels inside the gullet of a fish. Golden boxes that will set you on fire if you look at it or touch it (how convienent ) its no wonder it has yet to be found or seen. Anyone unfortunate enough to do so has perished upon laying eyes on it!

Then again niggas were magical back then, so what do I know?

They used to do all that stuff but eventually they evolved into the humans we know today. You can only touch so many golden boxes before Darwinism finally kicks in. You know those boxes of Golden Crisp at the grocery store? Those are the same fabled boxes, but thanks to evolution we can now partake in the sugary goodness without bursting into flames.

[Mizango]

They used to do all that stuff but eventually they evolved into the humans we know today. You can only touch so many golden boxes before Darwinism finally kicks in. You know those boxes of Golden Crisp at the grocery store? Those are the same fabled boxes, but thanks to evolution we can now partake in the sugary goodness without bursting into flames.

lol

[Tyche]

Just flipped through the DVR, theres something on TSN or HIST that details the 40 days after the resurrection*

*lol

[Galkaeater]

We're at war. No one wants to admit it but Humanity's under attack. One very specific man might be all that stands between Humanity and the greatest threat of our brief existence. We need a leader, and surround him with the brightest, the toughest, the deadliest allies we can find. The team will have to be strong, their resolve unquestionable.

[Akiyama]

Mass Effect 2, son.

[aduidarnenye]

So I posted that link to the blog about the existence of Jesus on my Facebook page and my uncle responded thus:



I don't know how to respond beyond "Wut?" at this point.

[Akiyama]

wut

[foopy]

"Wut?" is the appropriate response.

[EternityEnd]

Were any of those comments, sans the first one, English?

[Khajit]

I still remember that faithful day where I told my Dad that jesus wasn't born in december, and was probably black or arabic.

I must hear of this because it sounds like hilarity ensued.

[Kuya]

So I posted that link to the blog about the existence of Jesus on my Facebook page and my uncle responded thus:



I don't know how to respond beyond "Wut?" at this point.

He sends me on a tailspin right when he mentioned obama out of nowhere.