BG Advice: How to handle a specific crazy

[Apelila]

I know, another one of these. I promise, its not

My brother is Schizophrenic. Starting in 2001 he was heavily into drugs. Pick one. Any, he's done it. Almost overdosed on coke once.

2 years ago he went through rehab and stayed clean for a year. After this for about a year he almost became the person he used to be. Then a year ago his pysch medicine ran out without his wife realizing (he started hiding it after the second day by putting other pills in the bottle) and he suffered an extended mental break. The mental facility he went into didn't give him any medicine for 2 weeks, and starved him at one point. Since he's been out, he's been either insufferable or a junkie, depending on the day of the week ending in Y.

What can my family do with him, other than completely cut him loose and eventually get to spend holidays in Jail? I'm watching my parents piss away their retirement on psychiatric medication that he's either selling or isn't helping, and it hit the point where he's stealing from everyone, his own family included to support his habits.

Myself, I'm more than willing to walk away. For a brief moment he was my brother again, and now he's back to the miserable self centered junkie I've dealt with for the last 7 years. It's not that easy for my mom, who's codependent as hell and will 100% let herself go down (financially) fighting for him. I'm really worried that before it's all over he's going to fuck up everyone's life close to him, and that there isn't a damn thing I can do but to watch it and be as uninvolved as possible.

I don't know where to start, what to look for or even how to begin since I'm sure that any competent place will require more money than can be spent at this point. He's already drawing social security, but my experience in dealing with the government for these types of things is that it's best if you don't.

[Lucavi]

Why do people spend so munch money preserving the life of someone who is already functionally dead? I suppose blood is thicker than water. I have no idea what can be done to "fix" someone who doesn't want to be "fixed" and will do just about anything to not be "fixed". You're throwing money at a problem that doesn't want to solve itself and actively goes out of its way to remain unsolved.

Serious answer: call the cops on em, get em locked up, and let the system ensure that he's taking his meds.

[BadKarma]

Use a stun gun and mace.


But seriously, drugs are no lauging matter. Addiction runs in my family, as does schizophrenia. I know what its like to cope with someone close to you having those disorders.

But in your case, sadly, it seems that he NEEDS to be commited. But not to the shitty psych ward he was in previously. He absolutely needs to detox and he probably needs some zombie medication for a while.

[Odon]

Sadly, you cannot force a person who is abusing drugs to go to rehab and expect them to actually end up stopping. He needs to hit rock bottom. At that point one of two things will happen; he'll realize what the fuck he has been doing/done and want to change for the better, or he's just not going to give a fuck and keep living the way he is, in that case cut all ties. Nothing you can do will be any help to him.

[Skidz]

I would think almost ODing on coke would be "rock bottom", but it seems not. And I'm not so sure that cutting all ties is the best course of action here. You mention he did succesfully complete rehab and was "clean" for a year, so the will/determination is in there somewhere.

[Thuronn]

Let the weak fend for themselves.

[Eaglestrike]

I'd say your best bet is to sit down with him and explain how serious it is. Bro to bro. He has to be aware of what he's doing to his family at some level, you need to get him to face it and not run from it.

[Cream Soda]

I'd say your best bet is to sit down with him and explain how serious it is. Bro to bro. He has to be aware of what he's doing to his family at some level, you need to get him to face it and not run from it.

You've obviously never dealt w/ addicts, lol

[Dimmauk]

You've obviously never dealt w/ addicts, lol

You know who is good with addicts?

Jesus.

[miokomioko]

Call up one of those shows like 'Addiction'.

[Mytiwar]

Institutionalize

Schizophrenia often gets mixed up with a very heavy drug addiction (either one can cause or help develop the other). No easy way out.. you can't really rationalize with a schizophrenic unless he's under heavy medication and even then he mostly becomes a drooling, head in the clouds baboon (there are nicer ways to say it I know).
Basically, he needs professional help to get him back on his meds and away from the drugs; up here in Canada with the healthcare system it's mostly free, I don't know where you live or how it works where you're at money wise but anyways best of luck to you, it most certainly is hard to deal with.

[Dimmauk]

Institutionalize

Schizophrenia often gets mixed up with a very heavy drug addiction (either one can cause or help develop the other). No easy way out.. you can't really rationalize with a schizophrenic unless he's under heavy medication and even then he mostly becomes a drooling, head in the clouds baboon (there are nicer ways to say it I know).
Basically, he needs professional help to get him back on his meds and away from the drugs; up here in Canada with the healthcare system it's mostly free, I don't know where you live or how it works where you're at money wise but anyways best of luck to you, it most certainly is hard to deal with.

Good idea! Drive to Canada, leave him there, and let the Canadians deal with him.

[Mytiwar]

We already have Jim Carrey to deal with, we don't need more crazies

[kyod]

You can't force him to do anything unless it's court-ordered. Everything is his decision once he hits 18. Your family's only option is to continue to provide support and hope he gets clean or to give him your ultimatums and cut him off. The reason many addicts continue to not hit rock bottom is because family or friends still providing support. If your mom isn't willing to cut him off, there's nothing you can do and it's probably best to wash your hands of the situation, for your own sake.

[grantlogan]

Don't go to BG for advice, that's my advice. Seek a professional who deals with these situations on a regular basis.

[solanis]

you need to talk to a professional, not bg. addicts are master manipulators, and can't be helped until they want to change.

[Eaglestrike]

You've obviously never dealt w/ addicts, lol

Yeah well I'm pretty sure if he can't get through to his brother then his brother is simply fucked and you cut your losses. At least with a talk he could make a solid effort so that down the line when his brother offs himself in some manner he may be able to think "I did all I could do." and be at peace with it.

[Weiing]

So... what's going on exactly? What can't you handle? His schizophrenia and/or his drug addiction? I can understand why you/your family may be burned out, it's already difficult to handle someone with schizophrenia OR a drug addiction, but to have someone with a dual diagnosis...

Honestly, medication is not the only solution. I'm not saying medication doesn't help someone with schizophrenia, because it does... But he needs to be in a controlled and structured environment for detox and controlling his schizophrenia, whether that's a psychiatric hospital or a partial day hospitalization program. I'm sure there are state psychiatric hospitals. Perhaps you can call them and ask them what they could do. I'm not sure what kind of services/agencies you have where you live... If putting him into a psych hospital is too much (money), you could look into partial hospitalization, which is just sending him to a psych facility during the day where they take care of him and monitor his medication intake. It's usually cheaper, because you would have to bring him home after the day is done... And from the partial hospitalization programs I've worked with/known about, they usually take Medicaid or anything of that sort. However, I don't know what the case would be for the resources around you. I think one of your best bets is to contact a social worker from an agency to help you with navigating through these issues and finding your brother proper placement. Maybe I'm biased to suggest you go to a social worker (since I am one), but I would HOPE the social workers where you live (find ones who are at least MSW) would be competent enough to find you resources and hook you up.

It really hurts to see a family member go through such a struggle, as it truly impacts the family as a whole... But, although real and understandable, it also hurts when families come to the point where they don't know what to do and feel like they should just send the person off into the streets. The fact is, that really won't help the individual... because on the streets, they won't be getting the treatment they need. Obviously, it may be the easiest "solution" because it'd be "out of sight, out of mind"... but I think even he deserves a chance at some sort of life, rather than that...

[Skjie]

Cancer.

Seriously though, BG is not a fucking therapist or lawyer or doctor.

[Sonomaa]

BG Medical advice: See a real doctor
BG Legal advice: See a real lawyer

second verse, same as the first