Brother-in-Law Problem

[Lucienne]

Pretty sure I'm not the only one wondering that, who is this chick and why is she everywhere on the interwebs

Amazing.

I'd say talk to your sister. I don't know what kind of relationship the two of you have, but going behind her back to "fix" her husband sure won't improve it. It might be good to do this before her husband reads his mail. Also, tell her about the mail you sent him.

[Iku]

1. Tell your parent to go on a short vacation.

2. Tell the brother-in-law you will be busy while your parent is on vacation.

3. Tell your sister, 2nd hand smoke from weed will make her kid stupid as shit later on ( It is a fact btw )

4. ???

5. Profits

[solanis]

you should start helping her pick out her stripper name tbh

[Zetanio]

you should start helping her pick out her stripper name tbh

Best idea so far.

I don't think we need to go down the "You should be more Alpha" again.

[Ksandra]

The fact that your original post said absolutely nothing about your sister, the child's mother, tells us pretty much everything we need to know about this dumb fucking situation and your lack of understanding about how to improve it.

^ this


I have a fucked up brother-in-law for different reasons than the OP, but I'm not stupid about it either. My sister is also a fuckwit for allowing him to do the shit he does and takes his side on everything. You have to wise up and realize your sister is just as much the problem as the brother-in-law.

[hey]

So, he's depressed? Have you tried getting him to see a psychologist? Ya know...try to treat the underlying problem?

If he refuses, by all means, take the above advice to hopefully make him realize he cannot keep up what he is doing, but if he is suffering from depression, and that is the cause, it is better to help him take care of that, and hope that helps the other problems than to just go start shit unnecessarily.

He may be willing to get help, if you just give him a small push. If all he needs is a push, and you go in with the dynamite, you'll just make things worse. Start small, and if he refuses your help, then move to something stronger.

[Niiro]

Threaten to call the cops.

When he's looking at doing a nickel in prison for possession and endangering the welfare of a child he'll either shape the fuck up or the kid will be better off living with your parents.

edit: damnit wasted my 1337 post on this tripe

[Tagus]

I just wanted to say that your criticisms are truly welcome. I openly admit that this situation is giving me fits, and I have been unable to handle it with any intelligence. Also, yes. The email was a pretty horrible idea. Thank you guys very much, it's given me a lot to think about!!

Also, I'd like to add that my sister did indeed take his side and is currently trying to turn me into the bad guy for disrupting the status quo. You guys have been spot on.

[Lucienne]

Then you're more or less screwed. You could talk to your parents, but I doubt they would risk a possible conflict that might result in them not getting to see their grandchild at all. If you confront the guy by yourself, you risk them taking your sister's side and you ending up in conflict with the rest of your family yourself, without achieving anything.

[Tagus]

Yeah, that's the way it's looking. Not only am I screwed, but my sister is seriously upset about the whole thing. Deep down I think she knows I'm right and that he's pretty much a piece of shit, but she doesn't know what to do about it either.

[Ksandra]

Yeah, that's the way it's looking. Not only am I screwed, but my sister is seriously upset about the whole thing. Deep down I think she knows I'm right and that he's pretty much a piece of shit, but she doesn't know what to do about it either.

as I said, I have brother-in-law issues but it's different than yours, but I totally feel your pain on this one. I can't even explain how family-oriented my family is and we've never had any drama or anything anywhere in my family but we're on the verge of disowning my sister because we just can't take it anymore. My father strongly believes his heart attack was caused by the stress the two of them have created for all of us. And she allows it, and allows him. Same as you, my mom tells me sometimes my sister says things to suggest she knows her husband is a douche, but she continues to take his side against us and they feed off each other.

So ya, you're guess is as good as mine, but for me at least in my situation. I love my sister, but I won't let her or her husband cause stress in my life because I know she'll keep doing it. It's almost impossible to help those that don't want to be helped.

[Tekoa]

Tell your sister that if she is a mother that actually gives a shit about her daughter, that she will make a change happen. At such a young age, children are extremely sensitive to and influenced by their surroundings. Now isn't the time to just brush things off and say that it can be handled later. You don't have to go in guns-a-blazing, but if you care (and it seems you do) then you should start to do something to try to help out.

[Ddz]

Surprised as fuck that no one suggested CPS yet. It's pretty obvious that hardly anyone gives a shit about this poor little girl. She deserves to have someone spend quality time with her instead of being juggled around by a whole bunch of idiots.

[Tekoa]

Surprised as fuck that no one suggested CPS yet. It's pretty obvious that hardly anyone gives a shit about this poor little girl. She deserves to have someone spend quality time with her instead of being juggled around by a whole bunch of idiots.

Maybe because CPS should be used AFTER making an attempt to try talking to the OP's brother-in-law and sister? Don't get me wrong, you are absolutely right in saying that the little girl deserves better and shouldn't be constantly juggled around. But resorting to CPS based off what the OP has shared so far is an extreme measure to jump to so fast imo.

[vagus]

I'll go out on a limb and assume your sister is trying. Obviously this guy doesn't give a fuck. If she really cares about the kid she needs to get full custody. It seems like your family is willing to help her out. A lot of positive people in the kids life. Kid needs to be watched before the dad does something really stupid while smoking the dank.

Now to play devil's advocate. Dad could be doing a lot worse and drinking or doing other horrible substances. Maybe he just needs a talk to get back on track. On a side note, if I had met Casey before i found out she was a killer, i'd party with her. Still might, just wouldn't leave a child near her.

[quannum]

if I had met Casey

start calling him Casey

[miokomioko]

My father strongly believes his heart attack was caused by the stress the two of them have created for all of us

My girlfriend and her sister have a meth-head/jailbird/black-sheep-of-the-family half-sister who had gone randomly missing, probably to jail, for the 3rd time a while back... and in the process of going out looking for her or potentially bailing her out again, their father had a heart attack and died.

It's a really fucked up situation that you have to be real careful about bringing up because if the proud parents are too far into denial that their daughter is a fuck-up, you might look like the asshole who's trying to shake things up. As much my girlfriend and her normal sister (and everyone else in the family) despised the retarded meth-head sister, she was still their father's daughter and he did what he could for her when she needed help... and it killed him.

I would be careful not to end up being the one ousted out of the family because you were "attacking" a fellow family member. Families are often stupid as hell. Shit like this makes me glad I have an almost non existent family.

[Kohan]

The amount of rage I have whenever I hear about parents like these is astronomical.

It's a good thing this is the internet, because I'd get in a fist fight with someone over this shit. I've had physical encounters in public with terrible parents before. Ain't no e-thuggin', I will seriously throw down with a mother fucker who brought a kid into this world and won't take care of the Goddamn thing.

You want to make me angry? Tell me about a situation like this.

Also, to the dipshit who said that secondhand marijuana smoke will kill the kid's braincells, I'm too infuriated to intelligently debate with your ignorant ass, so I'll simply recommend going and fucking yourself.

[Jaybar]

But he said it was fact. You can't rebuke that!

[solanis]

I did some googling and everything I'm finding suggests it's not a good idea to let your kid around secondhand pot smoke. I'm not a user though, so I have no clue personally. what's off about the statement, kohan? you suggested you know whether it's good or bad. is stuff like

The National Institutes of Health (NIH) notes that research has shown that some babies born to women who abused marijuana during their pregnancies display altered responses to visual stimuli, increased tremulousness (trembling or shaking), and a high-pitched cry -- any of which may indicate neurological problems in development. During the preschool years, marijuana-exposed children have been observed to perform tasks involving sustained attention and memory more poorly than nonexposed kids do. Then, in the school years, these kids of pot smokers are more likely to exhibit deficits in problem-solving skills, memory and the ability to remain attentive.

http://pregnancyandbaby.sheknows.com...gnancy-109.htm

propaganda?