Random Fail: First World Problems

[Firedemon]

This is a silly statement. Depression is treatable as well with drugs and therapy. If you say that alcoholism is easier to deal with, then there isn't really anything else to discuss.

Are drugs the best way to handle things like this? No, but at least it's an avenue that can provide a base to try to become stable that alcoholics don't really have. My mom was an alcoholic, started drinking when I was about 12, so I've lived through everything that comes along with trying to help, deal with, and defend against an alcoholic.

No. This is NOT the case for everyone.

[Tokitoki]

No. This is NOT the case for everyone.

You can't say there are rehabilitation programs for alcoholics and then say that therapy and drugs are not a viable option for treating depression.

[Yuri-G]

Depression is very tricky. It usually amenable to treatment, but not always. Even when it is, the particular avenue of treatment that works best may be difficult to discover, and when it does work, it can take time. I started treatment about 6 years ago and I'm just now feeling like I really have a hold on my life - a tenuous hold, but a hold nonetheless.

[Tokitoki]

Alcoholism is very tricky. It usually amenable to treatment, but not always. Even when it is, the particular avenue of treatment that works best may be difficult to discover, and when it does work, it can take time.

.

Not saying you're wrong, but Firedemon's statement that addictions are treatable because addicts can go to rehab is silly and that was my point. While some things can be physically addictive (nicotine), many addictions are a mental issue like depression is. The problem being that you don't want to treat addicts with more drugs unless it's an extreme case. While drugs aren't the best avenue for any treatment, as I said previously, they can provide a base for some stability and the person can try to continue to work through the issues that they are having.

It may not work for everyone, but neither does rehab. Source: I can't count how many times my mom went to rehab, AA meetings, etc. and still relapsed.

[Kalmado]

I love my Paxil as it really helps with my anxiety. My previous doctor also introduced me to Xanax, which was a life saver at work. I honestly didn't know much of anything about Xanax until my doctor asked if I take anything for when an incident happens that (I apologize for this word) triggers an anxiety attack/fit. I said nothing and he prescribed me the lightest Xanax. It seriously helped me so much as it calmed me down very fast and I was able to think clear headed. We tried Klonopin, but that stuff put me to sleep for like, 14 hours. I can't have that.

Another huge thing that I'm lucky to have had is the hospital my wife works for offers for employee's households the opportunity for free counselling for near everything. I'd do a session twice a month and it helped a ton. Since we moved, even though her new hospital is under the same banner, the program isn't established at this hospital yet. I can't wait for it to be available again.

I've noticed a lot of people think they have depression or anxiety because they have a bad day at work and they are bummed, but otherwise they are fine. A lot of people think prescription drugs are an answer for their problems. Sometimes it is, but not always. I'd think the biggest key is to talk with people that may be having issues and also try to get professional advice. Online forums are nice and all, but everyone can be an armchair doctor. Get the professional help.

[dasva]

This is not true, mainly the bolded. Yes there are lines to not cross, but by letting the person go through their fit is usually more healthy than fighting them. That usually prolongs the fit and more times than not ramps up the problems.

I didn't say fight was more responding to the sit there and take it mentality. Ignoring the issue wont make it go away. Try to have some rational supportive discussions. Hell you might even discover they were right and you really are the fucked up one instead of just sitting there thinking they just being them

Just the bolded, and just my opinion because of course it depends on the specific situation, if a person leaves someone that has depression (or other) issues because they basically don't want to deal with them anymore I say it's better for the person with depression. The person leaving is showing they don't care enough deep down to stay through the good and bad and the person with depression will need strong people to help them, whether it's a friend or spouse.

In some situations that might be true. But look at it from the other side. You could also say that by treating them that way they are showing they don't care enough as well. But Dasva they can't help themselves. Yes you can... it is very difficult and in a void I would be totally 100% on their side. But in this situation it's being made very difficult on the other person as well and they are just as human and can have their psyche broken too especially to the extra stress. Something that can be hard to completely appreciate until been on both sides... though totally don't recommend being on both sides at same time. You also have to remember that some will while genuinely depressed are also or have become users/abusers and that's not healthy for either party

[Kalmado]

Oh I totally get your points. Really, with mental illness it boils down to the individual. I think (hope) we all can agree though that depression, anxiety, etc is not some simple thing and treating it can and is difficult.

[Yuri-G]

That's the thing, I've tried to have rational supportive discussions. They just turn into rants about what I've done wrong and how I haven't supported her through her depression and how everything she's done to me is excused because she's suffering. The last time we talked was after I had reached out to her multiple times over the course of a month and had zero response from her - literally no response at all - and finally I said "Can we get together and talk?" and she basically said "Fuck off." After which I found out that the reason we hadn't talked for a month was because I did some things that she felt hurt by - mind-bogglingly innocent actions on my behalf that triggered her through no fault of my own - and instead of bringing them to my attention she held them against me and purposefully gave me the silent treatment.


There's only so much I can do to reach someone, and she is beyond that reach now. She has made it clear that I'm no longer welcome and I'm not going to try and support someone who has decided I'm not worth her time, despite years of friendship. I mean fuck, I have her art tattooed on my body - she's my tattoo artist - so this is not a friendship I let go of lightly, man. Not at all. But I just can't with her anymore. If that makes me awful so be it.


If it sounds like I'm angry, I'm not. I'm more sad than anything. It's a situation with no winners. That's generally the case with real, clinical depression.

[Zeb]

First world problems? Some A-holes need to get their own thread.

[kuronosan]

Yea totally not your approach. She just must be a toxic bitch.

Definitely not you.

[Yuri-G]

Yea totally not your approach. She just must be a toxic bitch.

Definitely not you.

How the fuck am I supposed to approach someone who is holding shit against me and stonewalling me and lashing out when I try to initiate a respectful discussion?


How, exactly? Explain that. I'm not being sarcastic, I mean it. Explain this to me please.

[dasva]

This is a silly statement. Depression is treatable as well with drugs and therapy. If you say that alcoholism is easier to deal with, then there isn't really anything else to discuss.

Are drugs the best way to handle things like this? No, but at least it's an avenue that can provide a base to try to become stable that alcoholics don't really have. My mom was an alcoholic, started drinking when I was about 12, so I've lived through everything that comes along with trying to help, deal with, and defend against an alcoholic.

Addiction is way trickier than some people are trying to make it seem. You have the root mental addictions which is usually self medicating for mental problems they have often depression . The addiction caused by the substance itself which is usually fairly treatable though pretty rough. And then there are the long term/permanent damage in your body and neurochemistry that some of these cause that sometimes their is just literally nothing we can currently do about.

And all of these need to be dealt with and requires the person to really want to and fight hard and slipping back will always be a battle. I have the greatest respect for those that do because with all my issues already I honestly think I'd fall into it hard and fast and not come out and I grew up watching first hand what happens when someone doesn't try at all and it's made me more than a little neurotic about control of my faculties or at least the semblance of it. Still not sure if that's a good or bad thing. Either way thanks female biological birthgiver

[dasva]

Oh I totally get your points. Really, with mental illness it boils down to the individual. I think (hope) we all can agree though that depression, anxiety, etc is not some simple thing and treating it can and is difficult.

Definitely and sometimes it's so complicated and intertwined with multiple illnesses or just "normal" people problems that even if there is a relatively easy path to recovery figuring it out might be harder than the trying the one size fits all solutions that so many including professionals seem to be a fan of. Sometimes it feels we spend too much time figuring out cover up the symptoms than figuring out how minds really work or don't

[dasva]

How the fuck am I supposed to approach someone who is holding shit against me and stonewalling me and lashing out when I try to initiate a respectful discussion?


How, exactly? Explain that. I'm not being sarcastic, I mean it. Explain this to me please.

I know you are pretty understandably angry right now and that's ok. But shouldn't be making decisions like these in the throws of emotion. One or both of you might need a little space and/or time. Maybe you are right and she is done with you maybe she's just being emotional too.

As far as approach not really sure exactly how you talked to her but something that can help is to try and not get too defensive (at least to them). Like you can apologize for how that made them feel but explain how that's not what was meant/intended but you can't do anything about it if you don't know... then rage on here to us lol

[Brill Weave]

How the fuck am I supposed to approach someone who is holding shit against me and stonewalling me and lashing out when I try to initiate a respectful discussion?


How, exactly? Explain that. I'm not being sarcastic, I mean it. Explain this to me please.

You don't. You walk the fuck away and be done with it until she's done because a fucking asshole.

[Fondue]

Or alternatively- refocus everyone else's problems onto yourself and whine incessantly about extremely mundane things on an internet forum

[Yuri-G]

lol @ bitching about people bitching about shit on a thread that's made for people to bitch about shit

[kuronosan]

Actually this thread is about first world fails, not about your inability to tolerate bipolar rage.

[Boyiee]

^^^^

Or a hundred other things that aren't first world fails yet somehow end up being posted.

Fail or make another thread, you can fail there too if you want.

[Boyiee]

I had to take an instructor recert today and spent 8 hours in a cost-co folding chair.