Random Fail: First World Problems

[Raldo]

Got a lawn care citation for "weeds exceeding 8 inches". Dealt with it. Received a "second offence" citation a month later, despite it being for a completely different thing, this time for "not keeping the public walkways clear". Fucking sideways-growing grass was creeping up on the sidewalks, I guess. Didn't look like a big deal, but whatever. My weed whacker was broken, so I got down and ripped that shit out with my hands. I don't hear anything for 1~2 months, then I get a letter in the mail saying that I missed a court date?! Of course, it arrived two days after I replaced my weed whacker, and mowed the shit out of my lawn, so I can't even go look at my lawn to try and see what they were bitching about. I dug through unread mail that piled up while my wife was in the hospital, and sure enough, there's my court papers. Now I have to call the court adminstrator to deal with this shit. I've called them six times now (two different phone numbers, each on three separate days), and nobody fucking picks up the phone.

FUCKING LAWN CARE CITATIONS! This is so stupid.

[Brill Weave]

Got a lawn care citation for "weeds exceeding 8 inches". Dealt with it. Received a "second offence" citation a month later, despite it being for a completely different thing, this time for "not keeping the public walkways clear". Fucking sideways-growing grass was creeping up on the sidewalks, I guess. Didn't look like a big deal, but whatever. My weed whacker was broken, so I got down and ripped that shit out with my hands. I don't hear anything for 1~2 months, then I get a letter in the mail saying that I missed a court date?! Of course, it arrived two days after I replaced my weed whacker, and mowed the shit out of my lawn, so I can't even go look at my lawn to try and see what they were bitching about. I dug through unread mail that piled up while my wife was in the hospital, and sure enough, there's my court papers. Now I have to call the court adminstrator to deal with this shit. I've called them six times now (two different phone numbers, each on three separate days), and nobody fucking picks up the phone.

FUCKING LAWN CARE CITATIONS! This is so stupid.

Or, ya know, you could just cut your grass

[Raldo]

I really hate trimming the edges. I don't really know why.

[Blubbartron]

I'd recommend you write your HOA and tell them to choke on a bag of dicks. Your wife was in the hospital - they can go fuck themselves with their nitpicky bullshit about lawn care.

[Laugana]

At least it's winter now, no cutting for what, 4-6 months?

[Brill Weave]

Now they're going to crack him not shoveling lol.

[Aksannyi]

That's just cruel. Shoveling sucks.

[Raldo]

Thankfully, Texas takes care of that for me by not snowing or melting it quickly. Anything that sticks around causes the residents to shit their pants and stay indoors, so nobody will come around to complain, lol.

[arus2001]

Man, if someone tried to fine me for not mowing my lawn just right, I'd literally go to that court hearing just to tell them to fuck off. Then again, there are times I just want to turn my yard into a giant slab of concrete.

[Cliron]

Is it the local authority that is going around checking your lawn or is it a particular neighbour that is is complaining about it?

Because if it was a particular neighbour, I'd lose it.

Its a sign of such luxury and a lack of consideration for the life's of others when other people's grass effects your life. I had an older neighbour who complained to me about my grass back in Ireland, and I plain as day told her 'what a blissfully boring life you must have when the length of the grass is a problem for you". She never complained about it again to me, but then again, we don't send people to court for not cutting grass.

[Niiro]

That's just cruel. Shoveling sucks.

I'll shovel for 2 hours in the cool air before I mow/weedwack for 15 mins in the blazing sun and 80% humidity.

[Raldo]

On my 8th call (I called the two numbers again, shortly after posting) I finally got a hold of someone and have to reschedule a court date. He said it was issued by a cop (similar to a speeding ticket; the cop will be present at the hearing and we "might be able to work something out", whatever the hell that means), though that doesn't rule out that someone could have complained and a cop came by to verify. The citation is from the city itself, so I can't really ignore it. The last thing I got from 'em said if I didn't respond within 60 days I'd get a warrant issued for my arrest (lol, "What are you in for?" "I didn't mow my lawn.") and/or I'd have to pay $409+collection fees.

Now I have to leave work early to physically go to the court house just to fill our court date rescheduling papers or something, like I can't do that over the phone? wtf.

I was hoping that I could get some verification as to what exactly their complaint was for, because I was under the impression that I appropriately responded to each of the citations, which is why this pisses me off so much.

[Aksannyi]

I'll shovel for 2 hours in the cool air before I mow/weedwack for 15 mins in the blazing sun and 80% humidity.

I used to live in a region where you could easily get a foot of snow dumped on you overnight several times throughout the winter. Fuck shoveling.

Also, I truly hate everything about the cold weather. I will take a sweaty, humid day over that any day of the week.

[Ksandra]

Is it the local authority that is going around checking your lawn or is it a particular neighbour that is is complaining about it?

Because if it was a particular neighbour, I'd lose it.

Its a sign of such luxury and a lack of consideration for the life's of others when other people's grass effects your life. I had an older neighbour who complained to me about my grass back in Ireland, and I plain as day told her 'what a blissfully boring life you must have when the length of the grass is a problem for you". She never complained about it again to me, but then again, we don't send people to court for not cutting grass.

You're not from 'murica so I'll assume you don't know yet another thing that makes this country ass backwards compared to the rest of the world: HOAs.

In a nutshell: It's a group of people in your neighborhood that decides what you can and cannot do on your property. This includes both outside and inside your home. You actually pay monthly fees to these shitheads, and they can take you to court if you don't follow the rules. (You sign a contract when you buy the house.) A friend of a friend had to pay out 5k for remodeling their kitchen without approval. The idea behind it is to make sure all the properties stay on the same level so when you sell your house it doesn't go down in value if the neighbors' houses look like shit compared to yours. Which honestly, I don't give a fuck. If you are paying hundreds of thousands of dollars for something you should get to paint it neon green for all I give a shit.

HOAs aren't everywhere but they seem to be growing, and if you live in certain towns it can be basically unavoidable.

I seriously think they should be illegal, but that'll never happen.

[Raldo]

Sadly, this issue is actually from the city itself, not an HOA. Overall, I've been given citations for...
• Lawn maintenance (8"+ grass, "overgrowth encroaching public areas" a.k.a. trim around the sidewalk)
• Trash in yard (I was cleaning the attic after moving in, prev. owners had a fucking ratty mattress up there. Apparently leaning that against my house while I wait for trash day is a no-no)
• Tree in the alleyway (Trash truck realized they were scraping a tree near the alley behind my yard, and it was my job to cut it down)

It's like having a nagging mother watch over your house, but never knowing when or why she'll strike. Seriously, the cops need something better to do around here.

[Ksandra]

Sadly, this issue is actually from the city itself, not an HOA.

Ahhh America.

I can understand the sidewalk since that's technically city property, but the weed thing is just retarded.

[Moss]

If you are paying hundreds of thousands of dollars for something you should get to paint it neon green for all I give a shit.

Really? Even if it had a significant impact on the value of your property? HOAs can be pretty terrible but there are aspects that have a reasonable purpose.

[Ksandra]

Really? Even if it had a significant impact on the value of your property? HOAs can be pretty terrible but there are aspects that have a reasonable purpose.

Actually that, in fact, did happen on my street. I grew up on a street where all the houses are completely different (contractors came in to only buy one piece of land, and only build one house.) And yes, one house maybe 4? houses down was sold from the original owners to some Chinese people (an oddity at the time for CT). The house used to be a dark blue, and they had it painted neon green.

I mean, we all laughed at it since it looked kinda ridiculous. But no one gave a real fuck. And it didn't bring down the property value. How stupid do you have to be to be like "I can't live on a street with a green house!"

Really? I don't want you in my neighborhood then.

[Seraph]

Really? Even if it had a significant impact on the value of your property? HOAs can be pretty terrible but there are aspects that have a reasonable purpose.

I believe the phrase is "No Value Added". I would pay extra money to NOT be under an HOA. It's just a bunch of worthless people who get paid to lord over you and your home. Screw that noise. Some people must really like to pretend they live in a nicer area they they really do, or are just really into pain.

[Ksandra]

ONLY time an HOA is reasonable is complexes that have things like parks and community pools. And then the money should go towards the management of said things, since those are shared among everyone.

That's it.