Random Fail: First World Problems

[Astylla]

I just got stung by a bee while driving home. 75mph on the highway and I get stung on my gas pedal foot. Of all the fucking places.

I suppose I'm lucky to be alive, because I swerved like hell when it happened.

Fuck I probably would have panicked and slammed into someone. That's fucked up but glad you and everyone else is okay.

I take it bee's are not your friends either?

I don't fucking care If you are my husband that was a fucking dick move.
If you were here I would smother you with a pillow.

[Melena]

LOL. All I have to do is tell Astylla we are going to Disneyland and she starts jumping like a little kid and starts packing. I'm not worried. Yet

[Charismatic]

I don't fucking care If you are my husband that was a fucking dick move.
If you were here I would smother you with a pillow.

Teach him about apostrophes while you're at it.

[Astylla]

Teach him about apostrophes while you're at it.

There are some battles that can't be won.
After 5 years I choose them wisely.

And fuck you body. While I love how I am beginning to look while losing weight I do not enjoy my time of month suddenly changing on a fucking dime. Fuck you cramps , headaches and all the other shit that comes with it. Can't wait to rip all this shit out soon..

[Zeb]

Rode the motorcycle to work this morning. 6 miles one way. Something nailed my right foot so hard it is now swollen and bruised. About 1/4 mile from work I ran out of gas. Had to limp/push the bike to the gas station right next to work. On the way back home I couldn't see anything that could have been the offending object, except a dead bird....

[NynJa]

Im terrified of bees, wasps, hornets, etc

[Anoat]

The amount of girls popping up on my Tinder list who are only interested in a MMF threesome with their boyfriends are too damn high.jpg

[Clash Perez]

[arus2001]

I just got stung by a bee while driving home. 75mph on the highway and I get stung on my gas pedal foot. Of all the fucking places.

Had a wtf moment involving bees and driving a few years back. Crossing over a river with my windows down, just generally looking ahead when I see movement out of the corner of my eye. A literal swarm of bees just splats into my windshield, some managing to avoid 45mph silica death with 2 or 3 getting drawn into the car with me. So, for like 7 miles I'm driving as fast I can hoping they don't decide to take revenge on me and eventually pulled into a gas station with the right front/side of my car looking like I rammed an alien. Got the whole "I've never seen that before..." look from the attendant.

[NynJa]

Big fuckin sign that says "we are sold out of eggs, sorry"

Someone comes up to me askin "do u have any eggs in back"

[NynJa]

THX TO U GUYS IM NEVER EVER ROLLIN THE WINDOWS DOWN

[Sepukku]

Seconded, free pussy is free pussy, the other guy is the first world fail.

[BaneTheBrawler]

its not gay if its in a three way

[Abandon]

bullshit

[BaneTheBrawler]

you forgot about the golden rule

[Airenn]

and now my fail is not having seen THAT video. amazing.

[Meph]

Someone comes up to me askin "do u have any eggs in back"

well its common fact that there's always something in the back

[Brill Weave]

Im terrified of bees, wasps, hornets, blacks, etc

ftfy

[Charismatic]

ftfy

[Abandon]

lets go ahead and throw mud daubers on that list