Random Fail: First World Problems

**Salodin** · 2014-10-27 22:24

From the sound of it, all those activities caused the hemmeroid lol. But at least you're feeling better.

**Cream Soda** · 2014-10-27 22:26

I ate an entire can of spinach today at least lol. Not going to fuck around w/ fiber intake while this is here. One whole can of a green veggie per day till this is gone

**BaneTheBrawler** · 2014-10-27 22:48

reiterating not to push. don't put any strain on it, just let the poop slide out. if you're used to pushing it won't feel right, but trust me you don't actually need to push. the muscles further up inside your gut that you can't even really feel (until they do something wrong) will move it for you.

**Myrrh_Quetz** · 2014-10-27 22:49

That sounds like a pain in the ass

**Salodin** · 2014-10-28 00:09

Of course Bane is the one to give the best shit advice.

**SamanosukeShiva** · 2014-10-28 00:16

Twitch changed their TOS, no more showing cleavage. RIP kaceytron.

**BaneTheBrawler** · 2014-10-28 00:22

Originally Posted by Salodin

Of course Bane is the one to give the best shit advice.

well, jokes aside, i DO have considerable experience with poop and most of the maladies that can involve it, lol.

**Pharaun** · 2014-10-28 09:44

On my way to work this morning I saw a guy riding a bike with only a rim on the back and immediately thought of CS.

**Cream Soda** · 2014-10-28 09:58

Rim on the back isn't too bad. Just don't even risk turning while riding. If you need to turn, get off and turn. It's slippery that way. If you just have a front rim, that one is torture on the other hand. Feels like a jackhammer when riding.

So the anal cream worked wonders yesterday. In some pain this morning though. Ordered a stronger cream off amazon; hopefully that helps

**Jaffar** · 2014-10-28 11:26

Get some prep H wipes or at least some wet wipes, regular tp & roids is a bad combo.

**Cream Soda** · 2014-10-28 11:46

I've just been going straight to the shower after shitting lol; so I can clean up and reapply the cream

Edit: ate a can of kidney beans today lol and making sure I have 2 tylenol popped in before I shit. Fiber and pills brah!

**Astylla** · 2014-10-28 12:01

I now know way too fucking much about the bathroom habits of BG members. It's a common theme it seems for knowing mostly men online/irl I suppose..but ffs I'm glad I didn't want to eat today..

**Laugana** · 2014-10-28 12:50

LMAO too true.

**Aksannyi** · 2014-10-28 12:56

Should have also bought a stool softener. They gave me a shitload (har har) of it after I had my first son.

**Astylla** · 2014-10-28 15:00

I pretty much lost my only local friend since she became pregnant as she has maybe spoken to me 3 times in the last seven months and I don't see it changing anytime soon. I'm a patient person and loyal to a fault but I also hate that when life events happen people fall off the face of the earth. My last messages haven't even been about me..but to ask about her family..still not even an acknowledgement when I've seen other responses/seen it has been received. I just hope she is okay since I doubt I'll ever find out now.

She was pretty much the only person I could reliably talk to about different aspects of my life that very few know about or understand. This fucking sucks.

**Mina** · 2014-10-28 15:17

I'm sick today. Cat had a hairball. I saw the hairball. I vomited on the bathroom wall. I saw the bathroom wall, made me vomit all around the toilet. I ran from the toilet cause being near it made me vomit more. Ended up vomiting all down the hallway and on my feet.

Washed my feet in the sink while crying (I cry when I vomit) and the cat vomited next to me while I was cleaning my feet. Vomit is everywhere in the house and any time I get near it I start getting light headed and vomiting more (or at least serious dry heavings)

I threw my dog in his crate cause he was trying to eat all the vomit. (he thought he was helping)

I feel like shit right now. Resting my head on the desk until I stop crying and my stomach settles down.

And as I type this, I hear the cat having another hairball somewhere down the hall....

**bluefan** · 2014-10-28 15:20

Obligatory:

http://images2.fanpop.com/images/pho...60-513-386.gif

**AidenCarby** · 2014-10-28 15:21

Work was a shit show with psychiatric patients lol. Had to restrain and medicate one bitch in the hallway who tried to choke a security guard lol, I thought emergency medicine would have been fun but now I'm leaning toward getting onto the floors to avoid all the loonies.

**Elizara** · 2014-10-28 15:33

Oh crap Mina. That sucks, and believe me, I have the strongest stomach in the house. (I don't erm, barf often)...I can stand erm, spew as long as I don't have to stick my face near it/on top of it (I had to deal with mom's pukebowls to dump them down the can for that reason while she was having trouble with the chemo)

If I have to clean it up though I end up dry heaving/feeling queasy, haven't barfed yet b/c of that..I hope you can get that cleaned up without throwing up more. And I'd proly stick that cat outside a while. Eww..

**Mina** · 2014-10-28 15:54

I was told via text to not bother cleaning it up because I will make it worse.

I have a history of when trying to clean nasty smells/things I end up making the house more messy. This is actually the most contained I've ever had it...

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