Feminism Thread

[Charismatic]

The only place token resistance comes from is being raised to be embarrassed about your own sexuality. It's not a genetically ingrained ideal, of fucking course it can and should be changed.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Bingo

[NynJa]

Nobody wants to play the game because that'd be easier...

So youre saying sex is meant to be a shell game where one of the shells is "no actually means yes" and the other two are "good luck dodgin the jail sex".

Were you dropped on your head?

[Ksandra]

Nobody wants to play the game because that'd be easier...


And ya, it could come from being embarrassed of your own sexuality

But that's not the ONLY reason it exists. If you freak out because the girl didn't respond to your text, or hang your head in shame because she said no to sex, gives you shit, says you're not cool, bad kisser, too tall, too short, dick's too small, not enough money, your smile isn't cute, my last boyfriend was better, blahblahblah then YOU LOSE and the girl moves on to someone more secure, happy, & confident

Same thing on my end, it is WAY MORE efficient of my time to screen for bullshit by playing games. It just happens because that's what I want to do in the moment and looking back it's the fastest way to get scrubs out of my life and keep the good ones close

You have lost your god damn mind and are the exact type of person guys should be ashamed of getting lumped with.

[Thunder]

If this is just how you post that's fine but if you, Chari's, and Sath's angry vibes come out in real life like this I'm not too surprised you guys get frustrated with the games girls play. I legitimately want to have a normal discussion about this with the gaming forum I pretty much grew up with. If you want me to leave and have discussions with only like minded individuals, I'll go - no problem


I'm saying there is no dodgin the jail sex because I'm not socially retarded when it comes to having fun and having sex (coincidentally, I was socially retarded up until two years after quitting ffxi lol)

This fear of getting charged with rape is pretty irrational imo and here's why: If you are truly afraid of this shell game then what does it matter if the girl gave you consent? Maybe she was afraid, maybe she thought there was no other option, maybe she'll just lie about it to the cops anyway.

What does evidence of consent look like, anyway? Char, what evidence did you have that exonerated you? And did the girl have evidence on you? This CANNOT be taken seriously and only be a "your word vs hers" because literally every time a person has sex the girl can go around and fuck you over

What I'm saying is all this game playing is going to stay. The social world is not going to devolve into black and white decision-making. And feminists should want guys, AND GIRLS, out there learning how not to be socially awkward, angry, insecure, etcetc

Edit:

You have lost your god damn mind and are the exact type of person guys should be ashamed of getting lumped with.

lol, alright, I don't think I'll get any constructive feedback anymore. I'll keep reading but stop posting

[Ksandra]

If this is just how you post that's fine but if you, Chari's, and Sath's angry vibes come out in real life like this I'm not too surprised you guys get frustrated with the games girls play.

...I am a married woman, dude.

What I'm saying is all this game playing is going to stay.

It is with idiots like you who don't stop when they say no figuring they are saying yes. Teach your girls to be honest. Teach them not to be afraid of sex. Teach them to be responsible if they have sex. And teach those that if someone says, "no" you stop.

It is not something that will change overnight, but it can and will change if we as a society are smart and stop playing.

[Cantih]

Do not get me wrong. I think everyone should stop to the word no. BUT I also think the speaker needs to understand if they say no they also better mean it, and if they say it and the other person stops it is on the speaker to correct the confusion.

A lot of this whole, "well she may mean yes you just gotta read her right." Is complete and utter bullshit imo. If she says no you better fucking believe she means it. And hopefully women will learn to only say it if they mean it, and men will learn to fucking stop whenever it is said (can swap genders based on situation, I do not think only women say no when they mean yes or only men don't stop at no).

edit: to add, I don't think this is just a guy's problem. I completely agree guys shouldn't be playing the "educated guess" game. I think women need to be honest in sexual situations just as much as men need to be.

The only place token resistance comes from is being raised to be embarrassed about your own sexuality. It's not a genetically ingrained ideal, of fucking course it can and should be changed.

Ding ding ding ding.

The really aggravating thing is, the culture of "no might be maybe, because saying yes without some work means you're the kind of person polite society looks down on, so social fiction time", is a supporting leg of what props up the thought and behavior that gets you all these jerks.

Because some practice hard to get, the optimal behavior is to be over persistent in every encounter, regardless of how awful that actually is. It works fine for those playing hard to get, but makes life shit for everybody else as a side effect.
If the reaction of EVERYBODY to a no was a straight up walkaway (in addition to, you know, stop treating sex as a thing to ever shame people for), making hard to get/maybe a non-viable option, you'd see that shit die out. And then hounding behavior would have no excuse remaining to exist.

[Thunder]

It is with idiots like you who don't stop when they say no figuring they are saying yes. Teach your girls to be honest. Teach them not to be afraid of sex. Teach them to be responsible if they have sex. And teach those that if someone says, "no" you stop.

It is not something that will change overnight, but it can and will change if we as a society are smart and stop playing.

Last one, I promise. It isn't "no might mean yes" it's "no might mean not right now" is what the camp of "no might mean yes" is saying. Idk if it makes a difference for you, but the two mean totally different things to me

And I know you're a woman, my post was in response to Nynja's, I didn't see yours until after I posted

[NynJa]

Re read the posts that started this..this isnt a "not right now" situation. This is a guy stopping and next day the girls friends text the sayin "wow youre such a bitch, she wanted your dick bad and was just testing to see how bad you wanted her, you fucked up pussy".

(Words may be improperly quoted, but you get the jist)

[Ksandra]

Last one, I promise. It isn't "no might mean yes" it's "no might mean not right now" is what the camp of "no might mean yes" is saying. Idk if it makes a difference for you, but the two mean totally different things to me

And I know you're a woman, my post was in response to Nynja's, I didn't see yours until after I posted

But if no means not right now you still would stop until they say yes.


And you said you didn't want that to change, why? Because you won the lottery on guessing right finally and got laid? Why do you want everyone else to go through the same shit?

[Thunder]

But if no means not right now you still would stop until they say yes.


And you said you didn't want that to change, why? Because you won the lottery on guessing right finally and got laid? Why do you want everyone else to go through the same shit?

It isn't guessing and equating winning the lottery to not getting charged with rape for having sex is crazy :\ and ya, if a girl gives resistance I do stop what I was doing and do something else that will lead to sex or just come back to it later. I would not be getting laid often if I did not care about the girl's comfort lol. Sometimes it's even really beneficial for you to show the girl you realize she's uncomfortable and back off, now she's got more evidence you're aware of what she's feeling without her saying it, great! I don't just shut off my brain and rape her, that's literally absurd and you know that's not what I'm advocating

And here's why don't want it to change:

My bottom line is that it is SUPER EMPOWERING when you "go through the shit" and learn it.

I want it to be more accepted for people who suck with relationships to go out and learn about them. There's no shame in that. We are not all born casanovas. This is my biggest gripe, men are ashamed to admit they suck with women and they'll say that it's the WOMEN who have to change. Vice versa, too. Basically someone saying that it isn't their fault they suck at making friends, talking to people, having fun, AND that it's SOCIETY'S job to fix that. Those people aren't even willing to accept there's an alternative where THEY change because they're so set on it's the rest of the world's fault

[Xantavia]

And you said you didn't want that to change, why? Because you won the lottery on guessing right finally and got laid? Why do you want everyone else to go through the same shit?

Maybe he was the first (or only) one of his friends to have sex, and wants to hold it over them as long as possible? There are always situations where people feel if they did it the hard way, everybody else should too.

I gotta say, that is a small part of me staying celibate. Seems like way too much effort.

[Meresgi]

http://www.returnofkings.com/21313/5...ating-disorder

This is full of good advice and relevant 100% to this discussion.

#nofatties

p.s The comments are the good part.

[Ksandra]

It isn't guessing and equating winning the lottery to not getting charged with rape for having sex is crazy :\ and ya, if a girl gives resistance I do stop what I was doing and do something else that will lead to sex or just come back to it later. I would not be getting laid often if I did not care about the girl's comfort lol. Sometimes it's even really beneficial for you to show the girl you realize she's uncomfortable and back off, now she's got more evidence you're aware of what she's feeling without her saying it, great! I don't just shut off my brain and rape her, that's literally absurd and you know that's not what I'm advocating

And here's why don't want it to change:

My bottom line is that it is SUPER EMPOWERING when you "go through the shit" and learn it.

I want it to be more accepted for people who suck with relationships to go out and learn about them. There's no shame in that. We are not all born casanovas. This is my biggest gripe, men are ashamed to admit they suck with women and they'll say that it's the WOMEN who have to change. Vice versa, too. Basically someone saying that it isn't their fault they suck at making friends, talking to people, having fun, AND that it's SOCIETY'S job to fix that. Those people aren't even willing to accept there's an alternative where THEY change because they're so set on it's the rest of the world's fault

You are advocating that people lie so other people can learn whether it is a lie or not, rather than just have people tell the fucking truth and people listen to them. And it's simply because "qq I had to go through this so everyone should."


aka dumb

[quannum]

[Teryu]

http://i852.photobucket.com/albums/a...ps7dddcefd.png

Wow, lol. What an enlightened woman.

Edit: picture broke

[Charismatic]

...what, how?
Twitter. Your character limit, why?

That doesn't really say anything!

I'm not gonna fully disagree with that 'cause I don't even really understand exactly what she means by that. How does this supposed toxic masculinity tie to school shootings? Fuckin hell.

[Thunder]

Nah, if you want to lie it's on you, what I'm advocating is people to go out and experience people lying and telling half truths so you learn how to be more empathetic, understanding, and know what they're feeling without them spelling it out. Instead of aka dumb, fucking this, fucking that, what the fuck, oh my fucking god, you're so fucking dumb, you're the worst person on the planet, why can't you just fucking fuck me this is so complicated is this a fucking space ship oh my fucking

It's just not nice to be around lol, let alone fun to get intimate with and you want the above^ to get a pass on being a shitty person? C'mon, these people need to learn to be less of a chore to be around if they want to take part in social experiences. These are the catcallers, the guys/girls who say the creepiest shit, send the creepiest texts, have little friends, don't know their neighbors, scared of strangers talking to them, or just never approach a woman/man with honest intentions and yet want a voice on how this part of the world should work. That's crazy, it's like a non-golfer petitioning for new golf rules

[Teryu]

...what, how?
Twitter. Your character limit, why?

That doesn't really say anything!

I'm not gonna fully disagree with that 'cause I don't even really understand exactly what she means by that. How does this supposed toxic masculinity tie to school shootings? Fuckin hell.

She's using it to shill her friend's shitty book.

[Clash Perez]

Except that in this case, "golf" is something that 95% of the posters have been playing for years, if not decades.

Calling for a revision of nonsensical, shitty rules makes all of the sense.

[Ksandra]

Nah, if you want to lie it's on you, what I'm advocating is people to go out and experience people lying and telling half truths so you learn how to be more empathetic, understanding, and know what they're feeling without them spelling it out. Instead of aka dumb, fucking this, fucking that, what the fuck, oh my fucking god, you're so fucking dumb, you're the worst person on the planet, why can't you just fucking fuck me this is so complicated is this a fucking space ship oh my fucking

It's just not nice to be around lol, let alone fun to get intimate with and you want the above^ to get a pass on being a shitty person? C'mon, these people need to learn to be less of a chore to be around if they want to take part in social experiences. These are the catcallers, the guys/girls who say the creepiest shit, send the creepiest texts, have little friends, don't know their neighbors, scared of strangers talking to them, or just never approach a woman/man with honest intentions and yet want a voice on how this part of the world should work. That's crazy, it's like a non-golfer petitioning for new golf rules

You do realize that guys still need to learn how to have friends and talk to women even if the women tell the truth right?

This is so fucking dumb.

Learning when women lie does not need to be a necessary life skill.