Low Sex Drive

[thetruepandagod]

This is mind numbingly stupid to ask an internet forum about low sex drive when sex drive is something that can literally be influenced by ANY single aspect of a persons life. diet/depression/stress/lack of interest/game of thrones, w/e the fuck.

[Kerberoz]

Asking an internet forum and only providing a third-hand account of half the story.

[Ragnus]

I'm going with the kid ruined his sex drive.

[AidenCarby]

He's gay and cheating

[Souj]

So tell your friend that the next time he gets in the shower, have her sneak into the bathroom. She must be as quiet as possible. Go to the side of the shower where he'll have his back facing and slowly and quietly peak through that side. Carefully examine the upper portion of his back and if you see nothing there, you can rule out the thought that a race of alien pod people have taken control of his body.

[Dimmauk]

My girlfriend asked my male opinion on a situation her friend is going through. She's got a friend whose husband does not want to have sex. She's asked him if he watches porn or masturbates. He always says no way, he's not interested in any of that.

I called bullshit. He's getting his rocks off somehow. My girlfriend is not so sure so I wanted to see if the community agrees. I'll concede that it's possible for a guy to have no sex drive but I say it's not this guy.

For weeks I have heard stories on this guy and here is why I feel he's full of shit.

• The wife is beautiful. She looks like a better-looking Melissa Joan Hart with a big chest. She's a little over weight because of their kid but only like 20 lbs over. Nothing three months of working out can't fix.
  
• He appreciates the added curves. Her chest went from a C to a DD after her pregnancy two years ago. She says he's often grabbing at her boobs and ass but never tries to take it further.
  
• Other than the drive-by boob or ass grab, he never touches her, kisses her, or any other kind of intimacy.
  
• Sometimes when he knows she's really drunk, he will try to pressure her into having anal sex. She always refuses. Sometimes if she refuses he will deny her regular sex. Other times, he will agree to regular sex but then try to have an "accidental slip" in the middle of it.
  
• They have sex like once every two months.

So, this guy is in his early 30's, has an attractive wife who is ready and willing, rarely has sex with her, says he doesn't watch porn, and says he doesn't masturbate. I say he's either having an affair or masturbating. I just can't believe the guy isn't having an orgasm on the side.

I think the anal sex thing is pretty telling. It's pretty odd to me that someone that never watches porn is so interested in anal sex. Like where does one get the idea if not from porn?

And I have another reason why I think he's lying about not watching porn: He likes when his wife is completely shaved. I just think that this is also something that became popular though porn. Growing up, nobody shaved completely. Now that porn is more available, it seems that anal and the bush of a 12 year old is some sort of accepted norm in today's porn. Admittedly it's a weak point but it's something to consider.

I had a young friend that went through the same situation. He wound up getting caught cheating. But he said that he didnt look at his wife the same way after she had a baby. His wife was very hot, and fit too. Having a kid is hard, and tiring. So sometimes people look for something to blame. He seems to be focusing the blame on her, and on her vagina.

[zoobernut]

I had a young friend that went through the same situation. He wound up getting caught cheating. But he said that he didnt look at his wife the same way after she had a baby. His wife was very hot, and fit too. Having a kid is hard, and tiring. So sometimes people look for something to blame. He seems to be focusing the blame on her, and on her vagina.

A great sign that someone was not ready to have a baby.


Seriously though why hasn't this girl taken her husband to counseling if it is this bad... Or why won't she try anal? Sometimes a good way to get your partner to open up emotionally and communicate with you is to compromise on something that you have been very adamant about before. If she doesn't communicate with him and simply just says no then she is turning down sex and then complaining about not having sex which doesn't make any sense.

I would say that low sex drive and non-interest could be a myriad of medical shit but it sounds like his sex drive is fine, his interest in his wife is not.

[AoE]

There's just not enough information to give any type of meaningful answer and I don't quite understand why the O.P cares so much that he'd seek answers from people who can only speculate. Guy sounds like a douche regardless of the sex issue. Let them be miserable by themselves because it sounds like nothing's gonna change until someone finds a reason to file for a divorce.

Can't help people who can't help themselves, etc.

[myreality]

There's just not enough information to give any type of meaningful answer and I don't quite understand why the O.P cares so much that he'd seek answers from people who can only speculate. Guy sounds like a douche regardless of the sex issue. Let them be miserable by themselves because it sounds like nothing's gonna change until someone finds a reason to file for a divorce.

Can't help people who can't help themselves, etc.

Most likely because the OP is not seeking answers for another couple.

My friend has this problem you see, and i was wondering what i should do......i mean what my friend should do >.>

[Apelila]

Not people that actively seek anal.

He's most likely emotionally detached for various reasons and or just not very interested in her specifically anymore for any one of a million possible reasons.

Sorry, asexual in that he wanted something other than what she had to offer. I didn't mean to imply he didn't want it at all, she'd have figured that out long ago or be dumb as a post. There really isn't a word for the place between fucking someone just to get your rocks off and not really wanting your dick in what you have, ever.

[Roranora]

it could be that her vagina is a hallway to his hotdog

not all that uncommon for men to become physically repulsed; childbirth can completely WRECK a vagina

Repulsed/emasculated by the knowledge a football sized object (baby) popped out of her cooter

i like this route
gj bg

okay so more pro internet advice. he needs to put his underused penis in between those underused boobs. counter gross vag with tit fuck; win

[Gokku]

why has no one givin this guy the option of fucking the wife to see how bad / loose she is in bed?! it would get a hell of alot more info then hes given now and be 1st hand!.\

[Dimmauk]

Maybe his wife is a prude? No anal? What about blowjobs? Maybe her religion makes her not want anal? The guy sounds like a fucking douche anyways.

[octopus]

Why does him masturbate or not matter at all? I imagine even gay guys masturbate.

If he says he's not masturbating he's just lying.

[thetruepandagod]

I imagine even gay guys masturbate.

Why wouldn't gays masturbate? Pretty sure the stereotype is that they are as sexually driven as can be.

[Lucavi]

It's interesting to me, that no one is even considering the possibility that he's just not that interested in sex.

What kind of fucking man is not interested in sex?

A broken and useless one, that's what.

[hey]

What kind of fucking man is not interested in sex?

A broken and useless one, that's what.

Even if that were the case, why would everyone rule out the possibility of him being broken and useless?

[AoE]

Maybe his wife is a prude? No anal? What about blowjobs? Maybe her religion makes her not want anal? The guy sounds like a fucking douche anyways.

Maybe he doesn't wanna fuck his wife with a condom anymore.

[Ragnus]

He's saying he isn't jacking off for one of three reasons that have been stated.

1: He has ED and doesn't want to admit it
2: He's not attracted to his wife anymore and is trying to prevent a giant fight when she freaks out about him choosing porn over her
3: Extension of #2. He's cheating and getting off in another chick he is attracted to now. Probably doesn't want to admit it because staying in the marriage is probably cheaper then alimony + child support on top of trying to live by himself.

[Lucavi]

Even if that were the case, why would everyone rule out the possibility of him being broken and useless?

I'm not ruling it out; I already said he might be gay.

Zing!