How I mine for ring?

**Artemicon** · 2013-08-09 07:50

So yeah...

I've been looking for an engagement ring for my girlfriend and I've found and gotten the usual CCC advice but relatively little advice on how much I should expect and for what. Does anyone have any experience in selling or buying diamond rings?

How much should I pay for a ring and is there maybe a pricing guide or some general guidelines on how much I should pay online? She like filigree style rings and a huge rock isn't important to her as long as it looks good on her finger...

I'm not in the dark but I don't do this every day, I appreciate any and all advice even the "get out while you still can advice". ^^

**Byrthnoth** · 2013-08-09 07:58

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/...iamond/304575/

**Tokitoki** · 2013-08-09 08:11

I know this is going to be vague but...

My dad is a jeweler and normally helps relatives pick out engagement and wedding rings when they decide to get hitched. Normally, he suggests spending around $4000 for the diamond. The band itself is significantly cheaper just because the price of diamonds is so high. I believe a H-J quality is what he normally recommends.

That being said, there is a newer, "up and coming" diamond grading organization that grades diamonds slightly lower than GIA would grade the same diamond, making it slightly cheaper. The name escapes me at the moment, but I will ask him later what the name of the grading org is.

Dolmen · 2013-08-09 09:12

Advice - Only do it if you want to do it; don't do it if she's pressuring you.

My wife and I looked at rings, and the biggest thing to note is that jewelry stores use lighting to their advantage. We bought a house before we were engaged, so she felt a ring was a waste of money (and said she'd probably lose it). We both couldn't justify spending the money, so it's all a personal choice.

Overall, the differences in higher grading you probably won't be able to tell, but some of the lower grades you definitely can tell. I'd also look at the quality of the craftsmanship as I've known people that think they got a great deal, and then find out the setting sucked. I'd also check out jewelry stores just to physically see the various grades and colors of the various metals on bands, regardless of whether you buy online/offline.

**Byrthnoth** · 2013-08-09 09:19

You could take the money that you would have spent on a diamond and instead spend it on a nice band and the honeymoon. Diamonds have little to no intrinsic value and the only reason they're seen as part of the courtship ritual is because of a clever advertising campaign by the De Beers cartel that has been maintained over the last century. If you believe the last sentence, you don't really need to read the article (though it is well written and supported).

**Tatatoothy** · 2013-08-09 09:25

Do yourself a favor and use the money you'd spend towards a ring and put that shit on a down payment for a house or something more useful than something that will eventually be devalued and lost.

spoiler: my husband got me an engagement ring anyway even though I told him not to. He insisted on getting me one, so we decided on nothing too expensive. It's a cute ring (since I'm not the gaudy flashy type) that wound up being VERY inexpensive keepsake, and now it's sitting in its box as I opt to just wear my wedding band instead. I couldn't tell you anything about all that CCC stuff, I wasn't born with those genes.

**Ksandra** · 2013-08-09 09:31

Originally Posted by Byrthnoth

You could take the money that you would have spent on a diamond and instead spend it on a nice band and the honeymoon. Diamonds have little to no intrinsic value and the only reason they're seen as part of the courtship ritual is because of a clever advertising campaign by the De Beers cartel that has been maintained over the last century. If you believe the last sentence, you don't really need to read the article (though it is well written and supported).

Women like their rings, fool. All that stuff is irrelevant.

@ OP since you are doing the engagement ring, and you said she wants the look, you should look into combo rings (set that come with the engagement ring and wedding band, and sometimes even the husband's band, too).

Just to get an idea:

http://www.myjewelrybox.com/sc-wedding-sets_82/

Lots of styles look REALLY nice being combos. I got my band and ring separate, and my major goal was to find something that matched, and I got fairly close.

With that said, I strongly, strongly recommend buying it in a store instead of online for two reasons. 1. They will resize the ring for you to fit her perfectly. 2. You can haggle on the price (I love haggling) 3. As someone said, lighting can mess things up, so it's nice to be able to really look at it and turn it around n' such.

**Artemicon** · 2013-08-09 09:52

Thanks for the infos guys. I'm not doing it because shes pressuring me ^^ we've been together for 8 years and I asked awhile back for disney advice on this forum and I'm going to propose to her while we're down there.

We already own our own house and money is not tight for us but I'm only looking to spend about 3k~ ish on just her ring. Also I completely agree with you guys on the intrinsic value of this fucking thing. I think its a waste of money and not worth it but its not my ring and its not my finger.

Lol... do you think she'd notice if its a cubic or a diamond

**Rhyis.** · 2013-08-09 09:55

Originally Posted by Ksandra

Women like their rings, fool. All that stuff is irrelevant.

Not all women are into the bling. Pimped out honeymoon is becoming a bigger thing nowadays. People don't trust diamonds anymore.

**Slapper** · 2013-08-09 09:58

Buy a nice looking ring. I once knew a man who went the cheap route when buying a ring and every time people would ask his fiancee to see the ring she would look embarrassed.

They are now divorced.

**Ksandra** · 2013-08-09 10:01

Originally Posted by Artemicon

Thanks for the infos guys. I'm not doing it because shes pressuring me ^^ we've been together for 8 years and I asked awhile back for disney advice on this forum and I'm going to propose to her while we're down there.

*lives through you*

http://www.wdwforgrownups.com/forum/...gagement-rings

hahah, had I been able to afford it, I would have totally gotten one of those.

But I am a disney nut.

**Ksandra** · 2013-08-09 10:02

Originally Posted by Rhyis.

Not all women are into the expensive bling. Pimped out honeymoon is becoming a bigger thing nowadays. People don't trust diamonds anymore.

ftfy

I didn't care about the price of my ring, but wanted it to look nice. I think that's the majority of women (the looking nice bit). OP also said this in his initial post.

**vagus** · 2013-08-09 10:04

Originally Posted by Slapper

Buy a nice looking ring. I once knew a man who went the cheap route when buying a ring and every time people would ask his fiancee to see the ring she would look embarrassed.

They are now divorced.

Pretty fuckin shallow. Lol Can buy decent looking rings and dnot need to spend 10K on it. Lol.

**Raldo** · 2013-08-09 10:08

I tried to skid by with a cheap (compared to most, I guess) diamond ring. Paid ~$900 for it. A month goes by, and she keeps complaining that she sees some weird thing inside of it; she shows it to me several times, but I don't see anything. We finally take it back to the shop, they put it under their fancy microscope, and it has this huge gash (I don't know what else to call it -- impurity?) inside of it. I returned the ring and ended up paying $3k for one she was satisfied with.

Jared allows you to purchase a lifetime warranty, if you're worried about anything happening to it. Covers the gem falling out, theft, etc.

tl;dr: I don't suggest ordering online, so you can actually look at the diamond before buying. I know these things are supposed to be surprises, so you can't really get her input at the time of purchase, but if she complains AT ALL, you should probably go into a shop and have her help you pick something out.

**Rhyis.** · 2013-08-09 10:21

Originally Posted by Ksandra

ftfy

I didn't care about the price of my ring, but wanted it to look nice. I think that's the majority of women (the looking nice bit). OP also said this in his initial post.

I'm telling you, I know 6 couples that got married in the past 2 years. 4 of them never got engagement rings at all.

This is all no doubt irrelevant in this thread, as the guy should already know what his woman likes and such. Obviously the choice is up to the girl. Just pointing out it's becoming pretty damn common nowadays for a million different reasons.

**Ksandra** · 2013-08-09 10:49

none of what you said changed my statement at all rhyis.

Byrth is arguing diamonds are pointless, women who want rings don't think they are pointless because to them it isn't always about getting X value, but it looking nice.

**Melena** · 2013-08-09 10:53

When I bought my wife's engagement ring we went to Shane Co. Treated us great, didn't try to upsell us or anything. Wife's engagement ring set me back about 1500. 3 diamonds, with the center being largest, total of about .78 carat weight if I remember correctly and that 1500 dollar ring looks a hell of a lot better than some rings at mall jewelers at twice the price.

So yea, best advice I can give is shop around, spend what you are comfortable with.

**Seraph** · 2013-08-09 11:02

If you are worried about price, get a ring with several smaller diamonds instead of one huge one. Don't buy the rock/ring based on price, buy it on looks. People say "you should spend $XXXX" because they want to make money off of you. Buy something that you think looks nice without costing that much. I personally cared way more for appearance instead of stone size. Spending more than a few grand on a nice ring and setting? You are getting royally ripped off.

Also, and I cannot stress this enough, make sure if you decide to do something like "white gold" to make sure she isn't allergic to things like nickle. I know someone who bought their current wife white gold rings for engagement/wedding, and she is allergic to them. That was an awesome conversation a month after he gave it to her and she started breaking out after the rhodium plating started wearing off.

**GoggleHead** · 2013-08-09 11:05

My friend got his wife an engagement ring. Then they took it back so she could pick out something she liked. My take away from that is that making the effort is the important part.

**Vigilia** · 2013-08-09 11:07

If you got the money there's sites like Gemvara that let you customise rings: http://www.gemvara.com/Create-A-Ring...?source=create Even if you don't buy from there you can use it to try out different ideas and colours.

Speaking of Disney, Disney merch blogger on Tumblr made a range of princess rings using the Gemvara customisation tool: http://www.buzzfeed.com/donnad/outra...inspired-rings

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