YouMadness Round 1: Shepardg vs. Kohan

[Charismatic]

Next round is a by, even though i heart rag's and shiro, Kohan's an easy 20 point favorite.... however.....

that puts her up against perm, to make it to the final 4.....

I have inadvertently shot myself in the foot already....

I just thought of how you can atone for your sins.
Have someone tape you shooting yourself in the dick. Everybody wins.

[shepardG]

shooting myself in the dick with ... a gun? because I WOULD LITTERLY SHOOT MY DICK OFF. AND PROBABLY BLEED A FUCK TON....

I could shoot myself in the dick with a bunch of x-rays, from our portable x-ray generator... but that's not that cool...

[BaneTheBrawler]

mutant and proud, shep.

[Conrad]

Put some C4 in a pocket pussy and record the goddamn thing. Then you win our respect back.

[Charismatic]

shooting myself in the dick with ... a gun? because I WOULD LITTERLY SHOOT MY DICK OFF. AND PROBABLY BLEED A FUCK TON...

Sounds entertaining, yes?

[Rocl]

You think I am? I'm heartbroken. (I imagine this could be related to my explaining why slurs can be offensive, but I enjoy the works of far too many offensive comedians to consider them eternally off-the-table.)

Also, you're a faggot.

isladar v2

[Abandon]

whoa now

[Kohan]

whoa now

It's quite fine—I think his comments are adorable. I've had my principles since well before his balls dropped, not to mention long before isladar's "enlightenment." Considering, I don't think I'm simple-minded enough to be knee-jerker volume two.

Our friend here is just struggling through the transition from "fresh-faced gay boy" to "grouchy gay guy." It's a delicate time, and he's lashing out. We should be more understanding, or he'll never grow into a man brave enough to heckle fat chicks outside the Castro.

Just believe in him, Abandon. That's what he needs right now.

[Rocl]

roseanne barr had a
"traumatic brain-injury" when she was 16, dylan terreri had a "traumatic
brain-injury" at 16 - why has dylan's insolent creativity gone ignored
while roseanne's potty-mouthed insults are celebrated?

what does a man - who was "traumatically brain-injured" in 1990 - have
to do in order to follow in the gay-hating, female-bashing footsteps of
the mighty "slim shady," i ask myself. i was convicted of a felony a
decade ago, after i sent a ton of threatening emails to strangers as a
marketing tool for my website. i've written a plethora of anti-gay
essays and female-compromising petitions that i've posted on many
different websites to link to my own website, i've decorated my car with
graphics and slogans to direct people to my website, i've gone to
websites for parody and i've posted over a hundred song parodies written
by me that were taken directly from the 700 that are on my own website.


i was childhood friends with someone named seth who is in the band "les
savy fav" now, i just went to a bakery today and saw an advertisement
for a local man who is in a band and currently performing in nashville, i
see all of this and i ask myself "what about me". i've even written a
parody of a song called "what about me" that was done by a band called
"moving pictures" in 1989. so, what about me? what do i have to do to
get my 13 year-old website noticed by singers and actors and producers,
how can i let people know of the talent that has been brewing inside of
me for years? i can sing, i can act, i can write - all of my
homosexuality-compromising words of demeaning wit are on parade in video
skits at my website of (homo)sexual assault that is anti-gay.com[/url].
all of my vagina-compromising satire is on parade at my websites of
mockery that are .femalebashing.com[/url] and .strongwomen.info[/url] and
legalizerape.org[/url]. the product of both my childhood and my
"traumatic brain-injury" is live for all the world to see at my website
of morissette-inspired parody that has been jaggedlittledyl.com[/url]
since 1999.


i mock Strongwoman's menstrual cycle because it derails the entire
concept of feminism, simply with the fact that mommy lays an egg once a
month. i mock Strongwoman's breasts because they derail the entire
concept of feminism, simply though the role of the milk that mommy
produces for the life that started as the aforementioned egg. i mock
Strongwoman's dependence on the type of "special olympics" that is
otherwise known as gender-based sports teams. i mock the lackluster
"g.i. jane" and her reliance on gender-based military requirements. i
mock gender-based fitness centers and gender-based poker nights, and did
you know that the "coney island hot dog eating competition" had to go
and add a "womens' division" in order for the little females to triumph
(in light of the taller, wider, dare i say "stronger" gender)?
"we should've known you question your manhood when we saw you playing
with it like you just bought it at some kind of curiosity shop". "how
can you expect to be man enough to satisfy my hunger for a man...or
anyone else's hunger, for that matter...if YOU hunger". these are two
quotes from one of the anti-gay screenplays i have written, and all of
my screenplays are kept on my site. the idea started as
jaggedlittledyl.com in early 1999, out of an obsession with "jagged
little pill," and i later registered anti-gay.com after realizing all of
the anti-gay material on it. it's grown to over 25 urls, but it's all
jaggedlittledyl.com

regarding today's overcompensating society where masculivoids like gays
and females march in parades to fabricate a sense of masculine identity
(ala, "rosie the riveter" stating "we can do it") in hopes of believing
themselves when they say "i'm more man than you'll ever be," i realize
the thoughts expressed on my website would be deemed as hateful or
intolerant. now, aside from a bumper sticker i've created which reads,
"tolerate my intolerance, you bigot," there is nothing to say to anyone
who is thin-skinned enough to hold a pity-party and then call anyone
"hateful" or "intolerant". people like that will always be offended at
anything questioning their identity (their gender-disorientation), and
there is no getting through to someone bull-headed enough to use pride
as a defense-mechanism ("we here, we're queer, get used to it"). so i
mock gays and feminists and other masculine slights on my vulgar
website, which could've been "slim shady: part two".
i really feel that my talents should be recognized. as i've said, i can
sing and i can act and i can write. i am a talented singer with a
vocal range not as vast as mariah carey's, but i can sing along with her
on a few of her songs without dropping an octave. i have no training,
so the "orgasm" scales/sounds that she makes in the song called
"emotions" are not done as meticulously when i do them in my
falsetto...but i can emulate them.
i am a talented actor, having been the "2nd freshman thespian" in my
high school's well-established "thespian society". i've had "ferris
bueller's day off" memorized since 1987...and "dirty dancing" memorized
since 1988. i amazed my friends as i'd recite every line, i amazed them
even more than when i'd blow spit-bubbles off of my tongue. i was the
MC in cabaret, as well, at age 15...i was in other plays, but cabaret
was the one i got the most glory from.
stephen king was my favorite author as a boy, and it certainly shows if
you'd get a look at some of the "nastygrams" i've sent to restaurants
and waitresses who have treated me with little respect. i've been
investigated by the fbi, my letters were so twisted and so brilliantly
expressive that people were psyched into believing they were being
threatened by the mention of blood and islamic rape-rooms. though i
only brought up the waitresses' "blood-red vaginas" to imply that women
lay eggs. a woman bleeds out an egg from her womb. a woman is man-like
with a womb, wombman. womman. woman.
wrapping up, i will state again that i am a star waiting to be born. i
can sing, i can act, i can write. i have more talent than 90 percent of
famous people. i have more talent that 100% of famous niggers,
including the "white house-negro"...and beyonce...and jay-z.
i like to compare myself to slim shady, the anti-gay and anti-female
side of eminem, just not with the same kind of tolerance for black
people. gosh, if negros want reparations for a free ride from africa to
america, why don't they move back to africa and pretend that slavery
never happened?

[Abandon]

tl;dr
Rocl's a faggot

[Mertron]

got like a third in, then gave up

[Mertron]

just like my sex life

[Charismatic]

just like my sex life

http://cdn.bluegartr.com/customavata...ar31032_11.gif

[Abandon]

that's unfortunate

[tyven]

i made it to the part about the bakery and when i learned it wasnt Corner Bakery i scrolled by in disgust

[Xajii]

i made it to the part about the bakery and when i learned it wasnt Corner Bakery i scrolled by in disgust

MY MAN

are u still in the motherland

[tyven]

yea but i move to virginia suburbs in June

[Demosthenes]

virginia

LOL!

[Qalbert]

fuck va

[Demosthenes]

Places I probably would not live in given the chance.