To understand just how terrible the industry reviews are of the Detroit Tigers' deal with Miguel Cabrera, it's appropriate to draw on the examples from the movie industry.
The Cabrera deal, in the eyes of rival executives, is "Disaster Movie" bad.
The Cabrera deal, in the eyes of officials with other teams, is "Battlefield Earth" bad.
It's is "Heaven's Gate" bad. It is "Sahara" bad.
Folks from around the sport believe that Cabrera's deal is a guaranteed loser, and they do not understand what the Tigers could be thinking to sign on for this money pit that they know will have ripple effects on the entire industry.
"I just don't get it," one high-ranking NL executive said. "They lost their minds."
Said another: "It's an awful deal for the Tigers, and it's worse for baseball."
The criticism of the contract should not be confused with criticism of Cabrera, whose skills as a hitter are universally respected. But executives with teams other than the Tigers ticked off a bunch of ideas Thursday evening that they believe would have been better than Detroit giving Cabrera -- who turns 31 in 21 days -- the largest contract in the history of professional sports.
Among those:
1. The Tigers could've waited
"Why now?" was the most-asked question among officials who talked about the deal Thursday evening. They noted that Cabrera would not be eligible for free agency until after the 2015 season, and the officials questioned believe that if the Tigers had taken the same offer to Cabrera in the fall or next spring, there's no chance he would've passed on it because of the scope of the contract.
"If they had waited, they would've gotten another year of information, another year to monitor his health," one AL evaluator said. "Maybe he'll suffer an injury this summer. He's a big guy, and you don't know how long his body will be able to hold up [at that weight]."
Said another: "If you give a player a long-term deal two seasons before free agency, you usually can expect some sort of discount. Where's the discount?"
An NL official: "When A-Rod got his deal from the Yankees, he was a free agent. Cabrera's not even close to free agency, and he gets the biggest deal ever. It makes no sense."
An NL evaluator: "Why assume risk when you don't have to?"
2. The Tigers could've saved money and reduced risk with a different contract structure
Under the terms of Cabrera's extension, he will get the highest annual salary for any player, ever. Executives with other teams are convinced the Tigers could've signed him without committing for so many seasons.
"You could give him $35 million for three seasons [in an extension]," said one official, "and you would've saved yourself more than $100 million in risk. Hell, you could give him $45 million a year for three years, and it would've been impossible for him to turn that down -- and you save money on the back end."
3. The Tigers could've used the David Ortiz deal as a talking point in the negotiations
Defensively, Cabrera is viewed -- at best -- as a subpar first baseman, the position he will play in the immediate future, and rival officials assume that there will be a time within two or three years when the Tigers will shift Cabrera into a designated hitter role.
The highest-paid DH, by far, is David Ortiz, who just signed a one-year, $16 million extension. The DH spot is generally being de-emphasized within the industry, with teams veering away from identifying a full-time player at that position -- and paying a high salary.
Elite starting pitchers, shortstops, second basemen, third basemen and center fielders are paid a premium because of how production at their respective positions is valued, and on the other hand, designated hitters and closers are generally at the bottom end of that scale.
"You could make the [negotiating] argument that his salary should go down over time, because once he becomes a DH, he loses some value," an AL executive said. "Maybe you could've said to him, 'Hey, we'll pay you X for the next few years, but after that, we'll have an adjustment.' But Cabrera's salary goes up."
The NL evaluator said, with a high degree of astonishment: "He's going to get double what Ortiz will make. At least with A-Rod, the Yankees had a player who was playing a premium position where his production is outsized. Cabrera adds nothing defensively. He actually is a negative defensively, and that's not going to improve over time."
Said an AL executive: "They basically gave him $100 million-plus in a retirement package."