Random Win: The irl Fuck Ya thread

[Ksandra]

You haven't had well done steaks that were juicy and had a lot of flavor.

You had medium steaks that were juicy and had a lot of flavor. You may have ordered well done, but either because the cook was a bro, or an idiot, you ended up with something edible.

They didn't have pink inside, so w/e you want to call it is fine with me. I don't really like pink, it tastes undercooked. I'll deal with it if I have to, but you won't find me saying it's great.

[tyven]

Not doing it as a strictly romantic thing, doing it for the same reason I took her to Harry Potter world at Universal, just something she is really really into.

Getting blown and laid regardless, not like I need to go out of my way for that. We are stuck doing long distance for now so when we see each other it is just horrible mess of fluids nonstop.

LONG DISTANCE COME ON BRO WHAT IS NEXT U R GONNA DIP SOMETHING IN RANCH?

[Boyiee]

They didn't have pink inside, so w/e you want to call it is fine with me. I don't really like pink, it tastes undercooked. I'll deal with it if I have to, but you won't find me saying it's great.

When you have the "perfect steak" (medium rare) nothing about it will taste undercooked to you. My dad was the same way till I convinced him the same thing. He "won't eat blood" or something "still mooing" but if you let the steak rest the juices remain inside and don't run out.

[Ksandra]

When you have the "perfect steak" (medium rare) nothing about it will taste undercooked to you. My dad was the same way till I convinced him the same thing. He "won't eat blood" or something "still mooing" but if you let the steak rest the juices remain inside and don't run out.

Ok, if you want to play it that way, I don't have the money to throw steaks in the trash as I try to learn how to make the "perfect steak."

I am not complaining, just stating the reality. I didn't cook much outside of baking desserts growing up. Now with kids, I try desperately to cook good meals for them. I am just not any good at it though. I always follow the recipes to the letter, and they rarely turn out right. There are some things I do well, but they are few and far between. I am trying though, honestly.

[BerenTebogo]

Why would you throw it in the trash?

Fuck up your steak? Cut it into small pieces and throw it in a slow cooker with like any randomfuck broth. Congrats on your stew.

[Boyiee]

That's the best part about cooking that perfect steak, it's the easiest simplest thing on earth and very hard to mess up. But I can see where you're coming from and would cook you one in a heartbeat just to change your mind lol.

[Zetanio]

LONG DISTANCE COME ON BRO WHAT IS NEXT U R GONNA DIP SOMETHING IN RANCH?

So fucking meta.

[BerenTebogo]

The only good white sauce is my white sauce.

[Zetanio]

Also, Ksan. If you insist on shitting up your steaks to well done do this method.

REVERSE SEARING STEAK

Get a meat thermometer. Follow this recipe. If you still get shitty steak you are fucking retarded and shouldn't be allowed to hold a knife. You can be a decent home cook by just following the recipes. If you're having trouble with that then there is a much bigger issues. Most simple recipes are fucking bulletproof. Find a video, follow video, eat delicious food. I thought myself most shit via internet.

I remember mastering roasted duck breast. I had it once a week for 3 months (Yes, I had high cholesterol). I tried a bunch of dumbass, fancy bullshit to make it.

Turns out I'm a fucking retard.

http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/p...t-recipe0.html

Easiest shit in history.



Skip the taters and the terrible sauce.

I'm trying to make a point, poorly.

Just make steak. If you suck, do what Sath said and baby you got a stew goin.

[Blubbartron]

It's not that my steaks are inedible, just don't taste like most steaks I've had that are homecooked.

I season with salt, pepper, and garlic. butter in the pan etc. It's always chewy or dry or w/e. Hubby likes medium, I like well done (little pink is ok). And before you try to shit on me for well done, I've eaten a ton of well-done steaks over my life that are still really juicy with lots of flavor. And, I hate to be blunt, but if that's what I like that's what I like. You can't expect me to find something tasty that I don't like the flavor of.

Reality is it is cheaper and tastier to just go to Outback or something.

I didn't see it mentioned by anyone (besides giving you whole videos to watch), but if your steaks are coming out chewy/dry, the likely culprit is that you didn't rest them, and cut into them too soon. After cooking, while resting, the juices are trapped (by virtue of the searing) and get reabsorbed into the bulk of the meat, making it juicy and tasty. Resting 5 minutes is pretty much the minimum.

[Zetanio]

I didn't see it mentioned by anyone (besides giving you whole videos to watch), but if your steaks are coming out chewy/dry, the likely culprit is that you didn't rest them, and cut into them too soon. After cooking, while resting, the juices are trapped (by virtue of the searing) and get reabsorbed into the bulk of the meat, making it juicy and tasty. Resting 5 minutes is pretty much the minimum.

That's in pretty much every video we've linked and we talked about it last time she complained in the fail thread too.

He's right though. Rest for at least 5 minutes for skinny steaks and 10+ for fat steaks. You should leave rib roasts and shit for 20+ minutes too.

[Bardicrune]

Another tip for cooking steak. Let it come up to room temp before putting it on the fire/in the pan. It keeps the muscle fibers from seizing up and ends up being more tender.

[BerenTebogo]

That's probably my biggest failing is forgetting to get it to room temp and I'm impatient as fuck

[Boyiee]

That's probably my biggest failing is forgetting to get it to room temp and I'm impatient as fuck

A good trick is to take it out first and let it sit while you prep everything you can. When you're cooking it most of your attention will go towards it cause they cook fast, so when you rest it, that's when you cook your veggies or set the table or whatever else.

Doing both those things should give it enough time to get warm enough and rest long enough.

[Zetanio]

A good trick is to take it out first and let it sit while you prep everything you can. When you're cooking it most of your attention will go towards it cause they cook fast, so when you rest it, that's when you cook your veggies or set the table or whatever else.

Doing both those things should give it enough time to get warm enough and rest long enough.

I do it when I prep my veggies for roasting. Slap it one side of the cutting board and put the rub on. Leave it until the veggies are 15 minutes from done (~45 minutes) then cook.

[Astylla]

The real fail here is how many of you guys have gotten to this point in life not knowing how to cook. I can't fucking understand it. Granted I'm married to someone who's the same way but cooking isn't that hard. There's YouTube and so many resources the only excuse is being lazy.

My fail is I'm officially not going back to my previous job. Authorization to workmans comp is being sent for vocational training for a position that doesn't require repetitive use of my hands. What that is I have no fucking clue. I went to talk to my manager and she was running so late I need to go back tomorrow. Sigh.

[Zetanio]

Yeah, cooking is fucking simple dude.

[BerenTebogo]

Every single thing I know how to cook I learned from googling "how to cook a ???" and checking out a few recipes until one sounded like something I wanted to put in my mouth.

[Kalmado]

For steaks I think I got off a little lucky because my first job was at Lone Star Steakhouse. Incredible learning experience. I actually wanted to make cooking my profession but my area and pay at the time wouldn't allow it. Anyhow, just using salt, pepper, garlic powder, and cajun seasoning while cooking a patio steak (top blade, flat iron) in a frying pan earned the "best steak she's ever had" from my wife. She also was brought up to only eat "done" steak. Now she won't do anything but medium.

[Fievel]

Every single thing I know how to cook I learned from googling "how to cook a ???" and checking out a few recipes until one sounded like something I wanted to put in my mouth.

Yup, works every time.