2014-15 NFL Week 2: RATINGS WARRIORS

[Arvin]

ITS JUST ADDERALL MAN

[Arvin]

I need a break from it since I hit northcoast hard, won't be doing it at 100. (which btw, buy tickets and go you asshole since they're re-releasing tickets next week)

[Arvin]

anyways, just wait the lions gonna surprise with that awesome EBRON pick hes gonna be the next vernon davis like everybody keeps mentioning

[Moss]

Lions looked good. If Staffy keeps playing smart with the throwaways and cuts down on the gunslangin' that makes a huge difference.

I need a break from it since I hit northcoast hard, won't be doing it at 100. (which btw, buy tickets and go you asshole since they're re-releasing tickets next week)

Not gonna be able to go to anything until next year, unless it's local so Houston, Dallas, ATX. Gotta save up some dough.

[Cleverness]

nfl already going with "the executive that received the video never followed up on it" so rog can still say he never saw it

Which would make him a hypocrite since he told several people punished in Bountygate that being unaware of it happening isn't acceptable. I seriously dare him to try and pull that, New Orleans would come close to rioting. It'll be glorious.

[Bregor]

Will be surprised if owners get rid of him. He's made them so much money

This. Pretty much from the moment Goodell took over, the NFL, the networks, and every team is just printing money.

I can't see Goodell being forced out by the owners. They just saw the #26 market size franchise sold for $1.3bn on his watch. Think it would need something like sponsors/TV threatening to pull the plug and that seems unlikely.

This is also true.

[Boyiee]

There's gonna be flak but he's got the support of big names like Robert Kraft.

[Plow]

I can't see Goodell being forced out by the owners. They just saw the #26 market size franchise sold for $1.3bn on his watch. Think it would need something like sponsors/TV threatening to pull the plug and that seems unlikely.

Also best OP of the season.

While they've definitely been successful, it's not hard to argue they'd easily have been just as successful under any of a number of other people.

It's not, however, hard to argue that the NFL has had a string of team and player management controversies that have all been handled poorly by league management under him.


He's also almost certainly going to be the first commissioner ever to fail to add new teams to the league in their first 10 years. We're currently in the longest period of no expansion since the early 80's era of 2,000 people at Falcons and Bucs games.

[Bregor]

He's also almost certainly going to be the first commissioner ever to fail to add new teams to the league in their first 10 years. We're currently in the longest period of no expansion since the early 80's era of 2,000 people at Falcons and Bucs games.

Can't wait until the London Gentlemen win the NFC Really-Fucking-East.

[Krandor]

There's no real reason to expand Tbh, the league has a very good balance since the last one with an even number of teams for AFC/NFC and even each division.

And they divisions make more sense then they used to, what with the NFC West featuring the Saints and Falcons like it did for ages.

[Plow]

I would agree if there weren't 2 cities that wanted franchises badly enough that Taglibabaibalabalbu had to fight them off to keep the Saints in NO.

[Salodin]

Yo where bregor at? I gotta get these picks in

[Bregor]

Last week:

M/L: 10-6
ATS: 6-10

I still can't fucking believe the Jets and Broncos didn't cover.


THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 11TH



8:25pm EDT, CBS/NFL Network

Pittsburgh at Baltimore (-2.5) - I predicted the Steelers to win the AFC North, and in the first half last week they looked pretty great. Then they surrendered 24 unanswered points to Cleland and needed a last-second field goal to win. The good news is Big Ben threw for 365 yards, Antonio Brown got loose on Joe Haden, and Le'Veon Bell added 27 touches for almost 200 yards. The bad news is the defense let Cleland churn out 183 yards rushing and needs to get a lot more stout if they are going to be playoff bound. Baltimore's defense played well enough last week, holding Cincy without a touchdown for the first 55 minutes of the game. But losing the turnover battle and asking Flacco to throw 65 times (!) doomed them to a loss in their home opener. Starting 0-2 at home in the division, in addition to the "Beats by Ray" scandal, well that would just about do it for the 2014 Ravens. It should be interesting to see how Baltimore handles Brown, since they bottled up AJ Green until his late 77-yard touchdown. FREE MONEY alert! Under 44.5 looks mighty tasty. Their last twelve regular season games were under 44, and the last time they went over that number was December 30th, 2007, in the infamous Charlie Batch versus Troy Smith barnburner of a combined 48 points. The only thing that gives me pause is I feel like a lot of Thursday games get crazy, but I still like the defensive history of these teams. Also just a reminder:



I'll take the Ravens to win, Steelers with the points.


SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 14TH

1:00pm EDT, CBS

Miami at Buffalo (+1) - It's only one game, but the combination of head coach Joe Philbin and offensive coordinator Bill Lazor already looks like a winner. A solid ground game and third down efficiency were key factors in keeping the ball away from the Patriots last week, and I'm willing to bet they'll open up the passing game against a weaker secondary. Three turnovers is ugly, but I'll give them a pass against a tough division rival. The defense also played well, harassing Shit-Ass for four sacks and holding him to a 69.7 passer rating. Buffalo's win was just as impressive, with some big runs on Chicago's defense and forcing three turnovers of their own. EJ Manuel kept the mistakes to a minimum, and that will be key against Cameron Wake and Miami's D. The winner of this game will have a huge head start in the AFC East, and I think Tyche has waited long enough. Dolphins win and cover.

Jacksonville at Washington (-6) - It was a tale of two halves for the Jags last week, first "As the World Hurns" and then Let the Eagle Soar. The end result was a rough day for Gus Bradley as Foles shredded his secondary in the 2nd half and new feature back Toby Gerhart averaged a downright TRENT-like 2.3 yards per carry. The Jags are improving by baby steps, and like I said last week I think they'll compete in the AFC South in a year or two. And looking at that line, I'm pretty sure both the 1st half of the Jags game and the entire Redskins game were blacked out in Vegas. The Washington Professional American Football Club (WPAFC) did very few things right. They only got Alfred Morris 14 touches. They were 3-for-12 on 3rd down. They didn't record a sack or force an interception. But most of all the special teams unit was a disgrace, from a blocked extra point six minutes into the game, to a kick returner being pushed out of bounds by a teammate, and finally a blocked punt returned for a touchdown. I think Bobert the Third will have some success with the new offense, but he needs to go downfield a lot more:



I just threw up in my mouth. I think this will be another one of those entertaining-because-it's-bad games, and I'll go with Redskins to win, Jaguars with the points.

New England at Minnesota (+5.5) - Early in his career, Tom Brady could produce with anyone catching passes. No one would make the case that Deion Branch, Troy Brown, David Givens, and Ben Watson were some of the all-time greats, but Brady made it work. When he got elite talent like Randy Moss, the results were terrifying. Now, his best targets are injured, raw, or Julian Edelman, and he's not the Brady of ten years ago. If Gronk was 100% and Aaron Hernandez didn't murder three people, things might be different. (I bet you John Harbaugh feels really bad about those dead people and how they cost the Patriots one of their top players.) The defense should be okay, but they'll need more production from Ridley and Vereen moving forward. Speaking of formerly great New England quarterbacks, Matt Cassel had one of the more surprising Sundays with two TDs and no picks or sacks taken. The Vikings defense feasted on a hapless St. Louis attack, but we'll see how they hold up against an actual NFL team. But the one aspect of Minny's game that didn't get going last week was Adrian Deterson, and I'll bet he has a huge game here. I'll ride the 0-2 Pats train and take the Vikings in the upset. NOPE LOL Patriots win and cover.

Atlanta at Cincinnati (-5) - Battle of the entertaining Hard Knockses! (Sorry, Miami.) I called the Falcons upsetting New Orleans last week, and despite losing Tony Gonzalez to retirement the offense looks a lot better with a healthy Julio Jones and the combo of Hester and Douglas occupying the middle of the field. The backfield is a dreaded fantasy-killing four-headed monster with S-Jax, Jacquizz In My Pants, Antone Smith, and rookie/pedicure enthusiast Devonta Freeman, but they all add a little wrinkle to a balanced attack. It all adds up to a team that should put up 30 or more points pretty often. They'll have their hands full this week as Cincy's been one of the best defensive units recently. GENO Atkins is questionable with "feet" (seriously the way NFL injuries are reported is fucking dumb) and Vontaze Burfict has a concussion, but they're at home and I think they halt the Falcons attack. Offensively they struggled until AJ Green's heroics, but Atlanta's defense is nothing special and I think Dalton, Green, and GIODUDE will do just fine. Over 48.5 and Bengals to win and cover.

1:00pm EDT, FOX

New Orleans at Cleveland (+6.5) - A shocking 27.6% of ESPN Eliminator participants are picking the Saints this week. Why would you not wait until they have a weak opponent at home? Boggles the mind. Anyway, Rob Ryan's defense had a good season last year and added Jairus Byrd, but they looked terrible in Atlanta. They should bounce back and shut down Cleland just fine. And unless there's some September lake effect snow, Breesus will put up a ton of points. Things were looking grim for the Brownies at halftime last week, with their top running back injured and down by 24. But rookies Terrance West and Isaiah Crowell filled the void, helping to fuel a comeback before losing in classic Cleland fashion. Defense should be a strength for the Browns, but they looked utterly lost against Pittsburgh. Now they face New Orleans. Blech. Saints win and cover.

Dallas at Tennessee (-3.5) -



lol

The Titans marched into Arrowhead and took down the Chiefs, keeping Jamaal Charles in check, picking off Alex Smith three times, and racking up 400 yards of offense. Jake Locker still needs to stay healthy, but Ken Whisenhunt might finally give him the opportunity to succeed. His 111.4 passer rating and 70.3 QBR are impressive numbers. At home and against an inferior defense, he's a sneaky fantasy play this week. Titans win and cover.

Arizona at NY Giants (+2.5) - I didn't stay up to watch the late Monday night game, but the recap and stats make it sound entirely boring. One pick and five passes defensed is exactly what I expect from Arizona's secondary, and they held San Diego to 52 yards rushing, so at least the defense executed well. Still think this team is capable of a wild card spot. On the other hand, the G-Men had no problem giving up two quick scores to Calvin Johnson and basically never made it interesting. Rashad Jennings is valuable in fantasy for being a three-down, goal line back, but he was never good or durable in Jacksonville and Oakland. He doesn't really add much to a Giants offense that needs help everywhere. I can't believe Tom Coughlin hasn't retired just from being sick of watching this team. They should bring a recliner down to the field so at least he can doze off now and then. Cardinals win and cover.

Detroit at Carolina (-3) - Fire Jim Schwartz, win big. Makes sense to me. Detroit's defense was impressive, holding Victor Cruz to two catches and 24 yards and waiting for Eli to throw them the ball. They should be able to blanket Kelvin Benjamin in much the same way. If everyone on offense stays healthy, they could make a lot of problems for the Pack and the Bears. Carolina got an impressive win on the road minus Cam, even though they tried to give it away at the end. Newton should be back under center here, but rib injuries are nasty and it could affect his accuracy. I don't have a good vibe on this game but I feel like Detroit has a better command of their offense. Lions in the upset.

4:05pm EDT, FOX

St. Louis at Tampa Bay (-6) - Last week I said I wasn't giving up on St. Louis just yet. Okay, now I'm giving up on St. Louis. The Shaun Hill/Austin Davis experience at quarterback is tough to watch, and even their usually reliable defense was ineffective. To make matters worse, Chris Long is gonna miss a bunch of time after undergoing ankle surgery. I hope Jeff Fisher survives this terrible season and bounces back next year. It took a while for Tampa to warm up on Sunday, and even though they didn't have a 2nd half explosion a la Philly, I think they'll get things figured out this week. The defense went without a turnover against Carolina but I bet they'll get at least a couple here. Bucs win and cover.

Seattle at San Diego (+6) - So, uh, no Super Bowl hangover for the Seahawks I guess? They pummeled Green Bay in every way imaginable and I'm kicking myself for not investing in Marshawn Lynch in any of my fantasy leagues. Other than terrible injury luck or Earl Thomas continuing to return punts, I can't imagine much going wrong in the immediate future for Seattle. San Diego had a 17-6 lead going into the 4th quarter on Monday night, but the game was past the defense's bedtime. They'll be better moving forward, but not this week. Since Seattle is on the road I'll give PRIVS a little credit and say Seahawks win, Chargers with the points.

4:25pm EDT, CBS

Houston at Oakland (+3) - Pretty much the only reason to watch the Texans this year is to watch JJ Watt and Jadeveon Clowney blow up some fools. Now, Clowney will be out at least four weeks after having his knee scoped. But I do have to hand it to Ryan Fitzpatrick for keeping the offense above water in his first game with Houston. Looking at their upcoming schedule, they could easily be 5-0 to start the season (@OAK, @NYG, v.BUF, @DAL). This year's Kansas City? Probably not, but anything is possible. Oakland has to be rewriting the record books of futility over the last, what, 15 years? They've been so bad since their Super Bowl loss it's hard to imagine how anyone watches or covers their games regularly. They managed only 158 yards of total offense against the Jets, and watching Maurice Jones-Drew and Darren McFadden limp around as shells of their former selves is really depressing. Texans win and cover.

NY Jets at Green Bay (-8) - Speaking of the Jets, I'm not giving them much credit for their win last week. Sure, they had 212 yards rushing, but it's the fucking Raiders. I fully expect them to shit the bed in Lambeau. And I'm also giving Green Bay a mulligan since they had to open in Seattle. I really thought they'd make it interesting, but after that safety they just looked completely defeated. AR3rdDown is gonna go nuts this week. Packers win and cover.

Kansas City at Denver (-13) - There are few playoff teams that have had worse week 1 games than Kansas City just had. They lost the turnover battle 3-to-0, had just 245 total yards, and never even had a chance in a home game. Maybe Andy Reid can use this game as a wake-up call to his team, or rather that might be possible if they weren't playing the Broncos in Denver. In his post-game interview, you could see Peyton Manning was really pissed the offense sputtered in the 2nd half against Indy. He targeted DEMARYIUS eleven times but only had four completions for 48 yards. Expect that to improve big time. The Denver defense needs to step up as well, as Von Miller looked a little timid and might need some more time to get back to full speed. The good news is DeMarcus Ware was in the backfield all night and recorded 1.5 sacks. I think they handle this game pretty easily, but 13 points is a gigantic spread in the NFL, and I think Charles can keep Kansas City close. Broncos win, Chiefs with the points.

8:30pm EDT, NBC

Chicago at San Francisco (-7) - This is why you need to win games against inferior opponents at home. Chicago gave one away last week because they employ a white safety, and now they have a pretty brutal schedule. It starts in San Fran, where the 49ers did exactly what everyone assumed they would in dominating the Cowboys. Chicago's success will usually come down to a turnover battle, and the defense needs to steal more balls than Cutler throws to the other team. If the defense can be just a smidge better than last season, I still like them to make the playoffs. San Fran didn't really answer many of the questions I had about them going into the season. They started out like gangbusters, but failed to score in the 2nd half. I would have liked to see more from Kaep, and more touches for Carlos Hyde because Frank Gore looks just about done. Instead Jim Harbaugh went into full John Fox mode and pulled the plug on the offense with a lead way too early. This should be a good one, and that line looks way too big, but I still like the home team here. 49ers win, Bears with the points.


MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 15TH

8:30pm EDT, ESPN

Philadelphia at Indianapolis (-3) - I'm a glass half full kinda guy, so instead of focusing on Philly's slow start, I'll just say that if they played their 2nd half against Jacksonville twice they'd have 68 points! Seriously though I think Shady and company are going to have another big day against an overrated opponent. Nothing Indy did against Denver really impressed me, even though they ended up covering FUCKING SHIT ASS FUCK BALLS. Actually one thing did impress me, and that was Dwayne Allen emerging as a legit fantasy tight end. Hopefully Luck ends his obsession with feeding Coby Fleener and looks to Allen a lot more. I'd just like to remind everyone that this happened:



lol

Eagles in the upset.

[Bregor]

Also, BREAKING MADDEN: http://www.sbnation.com/2014/9/11/61...arterback-hell

http://cdn1.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chor...504/butt.0.gif

[Dimmauk]

Also, BREAKING MADDEN: http://www.sbnation.com/2014/9/11/61...arterback-hell

http://cdn1.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chor...504/butt.0.gif

Is that Michael Sam and his boyfriend?

[Dimmauk]

Is Rihanna really singing at tonight's game?

[Dimmauk]

http://www.addictinginfo.org/2014/09...-a-nfl-player/

Seems shady

[tyven]

cuts on 1 dime, tips two

[Plow]

guy that pays his employees $2 an hour bitches about people not paying them for him

more at 11

[Ksandra]

Also, BREAKING MADDEN: http://www.sbnation.com/2014/9/11/61...arterback-hell

http://cdn1.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chor...504/butt.0.gif

I am so happy!