Online Dating

[Demosthenes]

monogamous*?

Via path of least resistance.

[Milkster]

Last post here was before the ‘rona hit. How have peeps handled online dating in the pandemic world? I pretty much dumped Tinder completely, got too fed up with bots and fake accounts. They are starting to creep into Hinge now which disappoints me greatly. OKCupid is a cesspool. Bumble and Hinge (minus the emerging bot society) has been the best for me.

I’ve had to really balance safety versus horny during this pandemic. Like anytime I set up a date for like an outdoor activity I strike out. Only seem to have success if we do the dinner/drinks combo.

Nothing changed if anything the quality and quantity men I/we were meeting shot up dramatically. Straight Men are holding straight men back when it comes to online dating.

[Koyangi]

What the hell do you mean?

[Milkster]

Women are using dating apps less because the men they do interact with are harassing them, stalking, gaslighting, leading them on or full out assaulting and murdering them that they would rather not deal with that or even the possibility of it happening.

[Koyangi]

The murdering them part I'd say is infinitesimally small in the grand scheme of things. You don't have to be straight to treat other humans badly. Women aren't perfect either (when it comes to using those apps).

[Milkster]

Wow that's impressive. Going the completely ignore or minimize everything else to end up well all people can be bad route. Then saying being murdered when trying to date is insignificant. Dating is supposed to be fun. I guess you don’t hear the horror stories women deal with or the screenshots or the articles or the statistics.

[thetruepandagod]

Wow that's impressive. Going the completely ignore or minimize everything else to end up well all people can be bad route. Then saying being murdered when trying to date is insignificant. Dating is supposed to be fun. I guess you don’t hear the horror stories women deal with or the screenshots or the articles or the statistics.

girls really need to stop asking me to cut them with knives tbh.

[Koyangi]

Bad things or unique things tend to make the news. I'm not minimizing anything. The majority of users of these apps aren't going to experience the worst things you listed. YOU are trying to extrapolate that all of these bad things are the norm and happening to the majority of users and it isn't. For every article or horror story that's visible, there's 100,000+ normal interactions happening. Yes, those things suck and shouldn't happen, but stop making everything like it's an ACAB situation.

[Milkster]

You're saying women aren't routinely harassed, stalked, gaslit, assaulted etc. Online or even in person, that those are rare occurrences?

[Milkster]

BTW you're wrong

Perhaps some of that fatigue comes from the fact that women on dating apps were also much more likely than men to report experiencing harassment on the app, including 46 percent of women who reported receiving unsolicited sexual messages or images from a match. Harassment on the apps is an even bigger problem for young women in particular, with 57 percent of women between the ages of 18 and 34 saying they’ve experienced sexual harassment — roughly twice the number of male users in the same age bracket who reported the same.

https://www.insidehook.com/article/s...men-than-women


6 in 10 isn't a majority y'all

https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tan...ites-and-apps/

[Milkster]

If you know a guy that routinely takes women who are blackout drunk home or puts drugs in their drinks or catcalls women or even rapes them but you and no one in your friend group does anything, can you still say you're good people?

Same thing with dirty cops. Their actions are overlooked by the "good" cops routinely and they're enabling the dirty cops with inaction. "Well maybe they're just trying to collect a paycheck and go home! " well just fuck the victims of the actions of the dirty cops the rippling effect that has. Not to mention how these cops will have dozens of complaints that go uninvestigated then people are shocked when something egregious happens. If you can somehow look at the actions of numerous police forces around the country in the last 18 months and think yeah those are mostly filled with good upstanding citizens the indoctrination got ya by the throat.

[Cantih]

Bad things or unique things tend to make the news. I'm not minimizing anything. The majority of users of these apps aren't going to experience the worst things you listed. YOU are trying to extrapolate that all of these bad things are the norm and happening to the majority of users and it isn't. For every article or horror story that's visible, there's 100,000+ normal interactions happening. Yes, those things suck and shouldn't happen, but stop making everything like it's an ACAB situation.

I know Milkster can often be a shrill, insufferable, holier-than-thou jackass.
But this is a broken clock moment, he's 100% in the right.

It's not just the "makes the news" worst case scenarios, plenty of women on OKC, BACK WHEN IT WAS GOOD, showed off what their inbox looked like, and it was a horrorshow.

[Day]

The murdering them part I'd say is infinitesimally small in the grand scheme of things. You don't have to be straight to treat other humans badly. Women aren't perfect either (when it comes to using those apps).

Good luck bro

[Anoat]

I think that’s why pretty much every new dating app has adopted the “woman has to initiate the first move and men can’t message her without permission” stance.

[Milkster]

I know Milkster can often be a shrill, insufferable, holier-than-thou jackass.
But this is a broken clock moment, he's 100% in the right.

It's funny but these comments show up in the majority of discussions I'm in so this broken clock is pretty accurate.

[Cantih]

Well, we don't say it when you're just being a shrill, insufferable, holier-than-thou jackass.

We just call you a shrill, insufferable, holier-than-thou jackass then.

[Milkster]

That's the persona a large to all the posters adopt on this board.

[archibaldcrane]

Women are using dating apps less

I don't think that's true

[archibaldcrane]

But also, while harassing men clearly do drive some women away from online dating, they also lower the bar so it's easier to stand out with a modicum of humor and normalcy.

[Rhyis.]

I don't think that's true

especially nowadays. i'm pretty sure online dating is the only way young people get together in todays world