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  1. #1
    Chram
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    The "GM's are Fucking Retarded" thread

    Ok so here's the deal;

    We all know how utterly useless GM's are in FFXI. We all know they have near zero knowledge of the game and have an utter lack of compassion and understanding when it comes to all things game orientated. It pisses us all off but it can sure provide us all with some quality entertainment!

    If you have a story about something idiotic a GM has said or done to you or anyone else in the past, post it here. Whether it was three years ago or three minutes ago, post it and I'll keep updating this main post to include them all and hopefully we can make a nice sticky.

    I know of past instances myself (such as a GM telling someone to delete his account because he got stuck in sky) but I'll start it fresh here and just add on whatever people have posted. Even if you posted it before, do so again here. The more of the story you have the better. Screenshots aren't 100% necessary I guess but some validity is needed to stop this becoming a bunch of hearsay.

    And finally, if any pictures posted are in jeopardy of going down, make a note of it in your post and I'll re-host it.


    GM gives a lesson on how Phantom Worm is popped
    Gilsellers stole Phantom Worm and a GM was naturally called.

    http://odyne.ardana.net/gm.jpg

    Nice to see them earning their money!

    Preventing the masses popping Absolute Virtue
    Apparantly trying to figure out how to legitimatly kill the hardest NM in the game for the good of everyone is worthy of banning an entire linkshell!

    http://homepage.ntlworld.com/bigrussta/gmav.jpg

    The queue of people trying to pop Jailer of Love in the entire 56 hour period he was up peaked at an almighty zero.

    GM teaches us about racism
    The conversation;

    1 | 2 | 3

    So all a GM has to do for his money is to know and enforce the ToS, right? Wrong. Oh well, the guy was clearly lying anyway! lol!

    This doesn't even need a title/intro lol
    http://homepage.ntlworld.com/bigruss...ylistendc6.jpg

    【1番⇒双竜脚⇔<tp>】 > pos.exe (needs "proof")
    "I think it was... Yuriku that this happened to and I vaguely remember this so I'll try my best:

    So she was seeing someone use some sort of hack tool and called a GM... the GM looked at chat log and noticed she had JP characters in her macro... the GM then banned her for a day or so for possibly using 3rd party tools to have JP characters in her macros and did nothing about the hacker."

    Double standards
    http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y27...tofly/mess.jpg

    NA linkshell Valor claims Fafnir and doesn't want to kill it. This is seemingly ok because the Japanese do it all the time on Midgard with no consequences.

    Some Japanese linkshell steals Fafnir by spamming provoke on it. It was ganked so fast that nobody even saw it white.

    NA linkshells work together and steal it back by using Cure IV + Invincible at the tail cause the enite Japanese linkshell to flail.

    [GM]Danuve puts all the NA linkshells in mordion for three hours despite the fact that the Japanese linkshell had done it to them for the past three days in a row and suffered no punishment of any kind.

    The fact that a Square rep said "well, Danuve IS Japanese... not that has anything to do with it..." just about says it all. Yes Mr. Square Rep, we're all sure that it had nothing to do with it!!!

    And to make it just that little bit funnier, a JP member of one of the NA linkshells was let go instantly.

    The dumbest GM epitomized
    Taj pos hacked into the unreleased Alzadaal Undersea Ruins and called a GM to get him out expecting to get banned.

    http://homepage.ntlworld.com/bigrussta/gmlol5sp.png

    So not only did he not get banned for blatently hacking into an unreleased area but when he told the GM he had done it, isntead of thinking "wow, I'm gonna ban this guy" he tells him to submit a bug report. What a fuckwit.

    "oops lawl"

    Someone forgot to turn something on!

    Is there anything they can actually do right?

    [GM]Spynner shares his knowledge with us
    With regards to Absolute Virtue;

    http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y63...re/gmhmmmm.jpg

    Senior knowledge of FFXI
    http://homepage.ntlworld.com/bigrussta/adaGM.jpg

    [GM]Teelow confirms what we already know
    Check the circled line of text.

    http://www.tshot.org/daamian/gmconv.jpg

    Easiest job interviews in the world?
    Shouldn't they be required to know reasons for a GM called before they're given the hazing red and silver dunce cap to wear?

    http://img250.imageshack.us/img250/5...alflailkq1.jpg

  2. #2
    Weaboo of the House of Weave
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    in other news, I stole phantom worms from gilsellers today

  3. #3
    ٩๏̯͡๏)۶

    Join Date
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    http://www.skemp.net/gilfarmerwar/index.html


    and these in this order, but not gonna hotlink or bandwidth will get raped (gogo free photobucket)

    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v429/ ... nvo_01.jpg
    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v429/ ... nvo_02.jpg
    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v429/ ... nvo_03.jpg
    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v429/ ... idence.jpg
    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v429/ ... ence_2.jpg
    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v429/ ... ence_3.jpg

    This was like 2 years ago? Anyway, that conversation made me realize there are no good GMs, well except Shoukyaku (/wave dude!), otherwise I havent really bothered calling GMs for my problems because the calls go nowhere.

    Oh how I wish the GM would ban the fucking rice paddy cakes when they HACK THE GAME TO SHITS.

  4. #4
    Sea Torques
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    Bahamut

    That guy has to be the model GM for all of them. Everyone is trying to reach Ezramin's level of uselessness.

    It reminds me exactly of this PA comic;
    http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2006/06/09

  5. #5

    Quote Originally Posted by Lordwafik
    This was like 2 years ago? Anyway, that conversation made me realize there are no good GMs, well except Shoukyaku (/wave dude!), otherwise I havent really bothered calling GMs for my problems because the calls go nowhere.

    Oh how I wish the GM would ban the fucking rice paddy cakes when they HACK THE GAME TO SHITS.
    I remember when you first posted that... there was a bunch of stuff at the time about people getting banned for making anti-JP remarks.

    Seems like a logical fallacy.

    Japan is not racially diverse so making insulting remarks about Japanese is racist.

    America is racially diverse so making insulting remarks about Americans is not racist.

    Because Japan is such a racist and xenophobic country, you can't insult its culture in a general way without being racist...

  6. #6

    Ezramin's greeting is fucking classic. It's like he's a goddamn magician.

  7. #7
    ٩๏̯͡๏)۶

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    Quote Originally Posted by DeadLegend
    Ezramin's greeting is fucking classic. It's like he's a goddamn magician.
    He is a magician.

    I called him, he argued over nothing, then dissapeared!

  8. #8
    Smells like Onions
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    If I got the greeting from a GM like Ezramin's, I'd just respond with 'never mind'.

  9. #9
    Guest

    This is about a year old, I mpked some gil sellers I think, but I can't remember 100% why I was in jail. Was taken around the time when it sounded like NIN was going to get nerfed to hell instead of ranger in the patch a year ago.

    http://img478.imageshack.us/img478/8813/drggm3sz.jpg

  10. #10

    Landisl was pretty cool. I talked to him yesterday because RMTs were trying to kill Despot but weren't doing any damage (they didn't have enough people), so I just called a GM for the hell of it, I don't care about Despot or anything. Landisl replied and was very sorry that he didn't get to see it in time and stuff and then said afterwards that SE is planning on changing NMs in sky but he doesn't know when.

  11. #11
    Relic Horn
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    The PA link was ok, but I immediately thought of this instead

    http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=112

  12. #12
    King Bitcher of Bitchington
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    Chuggs M'koul
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    This thread is awesome~

    I think it was... Yuriku that this happened to and I vaguely remember this so I'll try my best:

    So she was seeing someone use some sort of hack tool and called a GM... the GM looked at chat log and noticed she had JP characters in her macro... the GM then banned her for a day or so for possibly using 3rd party tools to have JP characters in her macros and did nothing about the hacker

    ~Fin

    Another story:

    16 people claim Tiamat and were having a somewhat hard time... another linkshell calls a GM on em for holding and those 16 people were sent to jail... I dono I found it to be kinda ridiculous but that AV one takes the *CAKE*

  13. #13

    all it needs is some homoerotic pirates of the carabian fan art,

  14. #14
    Relic Horn
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    Carbuncle

    Quote Originally Posted by Gasgul
    all it needs is some homoerotic pirates of the carabian fan art,
    Don't say things like that right after Koul. Oh and lol Koul Welcome to BG Forums, I'm suprised you still play.

  15. #15
    Relic Shield
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bluetonberry
    If I got the greeting from a GM like Ezramin's, I'd just respond with 'never mind'.
    Go for the hoe check instead!

  16. #16
    CoP Dynamis
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    Re: The "GM's are Fucking Retarded" thread

    I've seen this GM before. He actually came to a Tiamat fight and said everyone had to move away from the Alliance's mages that was fighting Tiamat because we were in the way.

    But evidently that's legit, cuz you know. Standing where you want violates ToS.

  17. #17
    Chram
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    These are great, keep 'em coming!

    And could someone give me some more information on the above Midgardsormr Fafnir drama please.

  18. #18
    Old Merits
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    someone please post the "hoe check" on the gm in the area thats not open yet, that has to be one of the funniest screenshots ive ever seen

  19. #19
    Chram
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    Quote Originally Posted by Surealistic
    someone please post the "hoe check" on the gm in the area thats not open yet, that has to be one of the funniest screenshots ive ever seen
    Oh man, get Taj's screenshot from that idiot GM in the locked area in here too please someone D:

  20. #20
    Predictably Unpredictable
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    Re: The "GM's are Fucking Retarded" thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Girl
    I've seen this GM before. He actually came to a Tiamat fight and said everyone had to move away from the Alliance's mages that was fighting Tiamat because we were in the way.

    But evidently that's legit, cuz you know. Standing where you want violates ToS.
    He said I could call a GM for that at DA too.. where the fuck are people supposed to go? lol

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