What I want to know is if the kid was emotionally scarred from that day on.Originally Posted by sephir
What I want to know is if the kid was emotionally scarred from that day on.Originally Posted by sephir
I went out with a stripper over a year ago, and he told me he thought we were good for each other because we both have jobs (I work in a lab).
Yes, we are OH SO similar. We are both employed, like the other 95% of adults in the United States.
If you had to pay her to have sex with her it's called a hooker and doesn't count as a date.Originally Posted by Rheya
He, honey, he. :wink:Originally Posted by MikedeeFenrir
And there was no money exchanged, thankyouverymuch! This was a legitimate date.
Oh rofl. mybad lawlOriginally Posted by Rheya
I took a stripper out one time, she did coke in my bathroom than bleed out her nose onto my sink. I made her cough on my friend Brandon and told him he has AIDS now. She laughed.
I told you not to tell anyone that story about us Aedan.....Originally Posted by sephir
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I dunno about bad dates.. maybe premptive.
I've went out with a couple chicks I met on myspace that turned out to be "Hi I'm fat but i'm going to take this angled picture with my hair in the way to block my fat head" type girls.
The one that was pretty bad in particular.. I'm chilling at home it's like midnight this girl calls asks to come over to my place I'm like sure why not.. I go outside to wave her in.. pulls up in an SUV and gets out and.. looks like an SUV. Girl was physically 2 of me. So I just gotta suck it up since it's my place I pop in a movie (I was living at home at the time), the most unromantic movie I could think of (Army of Darkness). She proceeds to fall asleep on my bed hugging/raping my pillow and starts snoring really loudly. Movie ends and I poked her and told her she had to go.
blegh.
Hahaha I reread the story again at work and started laughing uncontrollably again, drawing the arched eyebrows of wtfness from the coworkers.Originally Posted by miokomioko
You have a really good writing style mioko, should start a blog :D
So I had been dating this Casey guy for a while a few years ago. In the Navy, good looking, etc. etc.
I'm not gonna make this really long, only that on the third date, when things were getting pretty hot between us, he asked me to fist him.
Like literally stick my (entire) hand up his ass.
Talk about a moodkiller. I left his place and haven't seen him since.
Oh hey, I got another one I just remembered.
This girl I took out one time, after a nice evening on the town we decided to get a little bit more "intimate" uh.... in her car. (Yeah, it felt so "High School.") So anyway, she's going down on my *cough* and everything's great until I see these flashing blue and red lights. Obviously, you know it's the police, so we scramble to get our clothes back on and pretend the windows fogged up for no apparent reason. However, she leaves her panties lying under the back seat.
We have a good cop and a bad cop, it's winter, freezing cold, and it's even worse in my little beach town. So, all I have on is normal clothes, no coat, nothing. I'm COLD. So I put my hands in my pockets. And Bad Cop is screaming at me while Good Cop searches the car. He's yelling at me cuz I may have a weapon in my pockets, and I turn my pockets inside out to show I have nothing. He says I'm being a smartass and threatens me with some handcuffs and/or violence. So next, Good Cop comes back from inside the car with the panties and shows them to us and says basically "Hey kids, we know what you're doing here and you need to take it somewhere else. This is public indecency." So they let us go, she drives us to a more secluded parking lot and we finish what we started and called it a night.
The End.
Could only end badly.Originally Posted by Matricide
Seconded.Originally Posted by scrockstar
Third and if they have an angled picture its only gonna end worse!Originally Posted by Huggo
If the chick has a weird-angled picture she's trying to hide how fat she is.Originally Posted by Ikith
This thread is going places. I like it.
More horrible dating stories plx! Unfortunately, I don't have any shitty dating stories. All of my dates have been relatively fine. Besides the few awkward, nothing to talk about, forcing conversation, dates.
well, this was kinda back in the day before myspace blew up like it is now.. but i've learned my lesson ; ;
http://64.111.216.18/ul/1967-ts6t.jpgOriginally Posted by Matricide
^win
Not quite as hilarious but still hilarious none the less.Originally Posted by Epincus
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:81223 ... arch:story
One time during the early EQ days, I went down to Alabama and banged a divorced chick (23 my EQ-wife w~) and I was 19. It ended horribly later that night as I woke with a raging ex-husband with a knife at my throat and me trying to "not die."
Condensed version^ but definitely the best fuck ever.