From the LOLSash Server

[Gatsby]

First we had a WHM with a Novio, Map and his Sash, then Blacknova.

I now bring you even more drama from the LOLSash server.

http://killingifrit.com/forums.php?m=posts&q=158346

The mildly entertaining journey of an online relationship, enjoy.

Let us begin our adventure with this handy link that will periodically assist us in regards to identity issues.
http://www.usa-people-search.com/People ... earch.aspx

Last summer was damn fun. Goin out drinkin, partying, traveling with friends outside of game. In-game just screwing around, cybering, phoning, even meeting up with ff girls. Particle during this time blew at endgame of course (lolparticlul) so when I was on game I was either net-flinging, or ballistaing cause both are semi-entertaining. In the middle of all these random flings along comes Lenya, in fact during my Limica fling (lol oops!), spilling her fucking lil heart out to me how she had always wanted to be more than friends, loved my personality etc etc, and needless to say I was charmed at her terrible sentence structure, spelling, and punctuation. Every weakness I myself have, magnified x10. She was sucha retard bitch cutey and won me over. At this point I told her I wanted nothing to do with her unless she planned on having some kind of real life future together. Summer was dying down and I was tired of being the server manslut. I figured I love this game, wouldnt it be exceptional to find a kick-ass girl that loves this game too, and have a real meaningful relationship with her. (mistake) Being the angel she is, and absolutely lying through her teeth she swore on everything holy that this is what she wanted.

Though I didnt shower Lenya in gil or buy her anything (primarily because i think gifts and money have nothing to do with attraction) I did spend alot of time helping her with all the problems in life that I could. I would help with questions on her schooling, work, and life in general, and game related, just have a ton of fun, and countlessly bail her out of the absolutely retarded situations she constantly put herself into socially, as many already know. It got so bad I had to attach her to my name in joining Karasu. I just thought to myself, she doesnt know any better and needs somebody to stick up for her, lead her, and love her.

Our game time together was fun and usually hilarious, but the move to a real relationship was going nowhere. She would fabricate excuses of why she could never call, or give an address so I could write her back. All she would say was her full name birthday, and constant re-assurances of the magical future that awaited us (lawl)

------This is the part that nobody but map and bagel know------
During winter I began to doubt that this would work out. Lenya was just making no effort to make something real happen, so I began a serious relationship out of game (which I dont know if you consider that cheating.. do you? I'll make a poll later) Map and Bagel believe it or not, actually are good friends and totally covered my ass, but I was tired of feeling guilty, and Hallie and Lenya together required way more attention than I could give them both seperately if I was going to finish college. Again, I dont know why but I chose Lenya, I guess it was because I thought I had a heart and was trying to follow it.

Finally one day Jack(map) found this site USA people search and was playing around with it. We were lookin up all our friends blown away by the accuracy of this site and he's like lol put Lenya in it. I did and couldnt find her. I looked up by her birthday and she gave me her zip and nothing turns up but some guy named stephen maniscalco. Needless to say I was a bit jarred and freaked out, I was wondering what the fuck was going on and demanded explanations. Then she explained how her real last name was actually Santomauro, and her real birthday was 2/2/85 not 12/2/84. Even though Lenya's fabricated lies didnt make much sense, I didnt look further into it. I was willing to believe anything save knowing the fact that I could have been with a guy online this whole time, so I went with it.

Adding up all the lies and unfuffilled promises killed the relationship though.
On her birthday with some of my friends I pretty much knocked out all of COP for her, planning etc. Later she calls some other person a noob for not having sea, claiming she spent "hours" shouting for help to get chapter done. She moves temporarily to another server and bragged to me about how much money she made selling her byrnie etc for 900k, Bagel looks up on FFxiah.com, it was sold for 500k, almost less than she bought it for. I've never met somebody who lies as much as Lenya. Finally after being fed up enough with the bullshit and still not having her even call, we end it, and I hook up with hatsumomo. A night later we're gettin busy on skype/vent or whatever and Lenya interrupts it by spam telling hatsu and calling her a total bitch etc etc getting jealous. That whole thing ends and Lenya decides she just wants us to be friends with benifits, and I insist we should do this right if we're going to do it at all. She freaks (which is always what happens when suggesting progression in real life) and at this point I take a visit back to USA people.

Give it a try, put in Ducloux for last name, 23 for age, you'll find me
Try playing with the site, with yourself, or your friends, Its really alot of fun unless you accidently figure out your online girlfriends a dude lol
the more information you have the easier it is to find the person, however, as you can see it doesnt take much

now ladies and gents, put in Maniscalco 12/2/1984 zip 11223, or hell, even take out the zip and just use NY instead, theres still only 1, Stephen Maniscalco, which knowing this, makes all the mysteries of strange behavior go away.

So in my comment this morning I put, "Stephen Maniscalco, dont worry, your secret is safe with me" And instead of confronting and admitting to his lie, and dealing with the truth, he calls the GM for my comment, knowing that I'm out of warnings, because we all know I'm already very familiar with GM jail. He'd rather see somebody that was always been there for him as a friend get their account banned than admit to a lie. In GM chat I asked why I was in being banned, I was told this: You cannot use the real name of a Final Fantasy character in your comment at any time.

[Demosthenes11]

loljack

[Sho]

This story is um... damn.

[Kurp]

This board's infatuation with Map will add many posts, even though he's a minor player.

[Akiyama]

Wow. That's pretty awesome. Granted not for that guy who found out his girl was a dude, and it happens a lot, so not much you can do about that. >.>

[Tyche]

------This is the part that nobody but map and bagel know------
During winter I began to doubt that this would work out. Lenya was just making no effort to make something real happen, so I began a serious relationship out of game (which I dont know if you consider that cheating.. do you? I'll make a poll later) Map and Bagel believe it or not, actually are good friends and totally covered my ass, but I was tired of feeling guilty, and Hallie and Lenya together required way more attention than I could give them both seperately if I was going to finish college. Again, I dont know why but I chose Lenya, I guess it was because I thought I had a heart and was trying to follow it.

Am I reading this correctly in asserting that he left a real life piece of ass for a gamer he's never met? Sounds like all this was deserving

[Valacirca]

Jesus Christ is this guy dumb.

[Weltall]

loljack

[Sendra]

loljack

Also, WOW.

[Rocl]

sometimes I wish I was a girl character so I could get away with shit like this

[Axil]

sometimes I wish I was a girl character so I could get away with shit like this

Theres always septimus!
Wait youre not a galka

[Qbertian]

I can't wait for the Peppermaster's viewpoints on this, witnessing the madness first hand and all...

[Bagel]

I can only hope this will mean that Lenya will stop playing FFXI. At least now the hitherto unknown third roommate will have some notoriety here on /bg/.

[Deuce]

wow just wow. E-relationships never cease to amaze me.

[Map]

Well now all of apt. 257 has made it on BG! Party on ventrillo tonight though, lenya's getting on to prove he's a woman.

[Clavat]

tonight means he needs some time to hire a woman to be him. good times

[Malaquist]

Let us begin our adventure with this handy link that will periodically assist us in regards to identity issues.
http://www.usa-people-search.com/People ... earch.aspx

I don't show up on it; I can continue to use men with impunity!

sometimes I wish I was a girl character so I could get away with shit like this

Say you're a girl playing a male character so you don't get hit on.

[Indalecia]

That link didn't find me or my roommate. Maybe military/former military is harder to track?

[Zosi]

Found me, but the address it gives is around 5 years old, from before I went to college.

About the drama, well... this is why I don't go looking for hot single women in video games. The old maxim that there's no such thing as women on the internet is by far the safest attitude to have when you start wondering if the person behind that cute Hume F is really a horny 19 year old single girl.

[Watkins]

tl;dr