Opinions from married men needed

[Tonko]

Lets say you were out of town and your wife were to go out to eat with an old friend who happens to be a guy:

would you allow it?
would you trust her and therefore not care either way?
would you only allow it if you were present (i.e. wait until your back )?
would you expect her to say no?
would you make her say no?

This is a bit vague, but opinions are appreciated. Ill prob elaborate more when I get home from work.

If you ever try to "forbid" your wife to do something, or "make her" do anything, then just go file for divorce now. She's an independent person, free to do as she wishes. If you don't like it, get a divorce, but never, ever, try to control her.

Seriously, grow up, you do NOT own her.

[Intense]

Lets say you were out of town and your wife were to go out to eat with an old friend who happens to be a guy:

would you allow it?
would you trust her and therefore not care either way?
would you only allow it if you were present (i.e. wait until your back )?
would you expect her to say no?
would you make her say no?

This is a bit vague, but opinions are appreciated. Ill prob elaborate more when I get home from work.

If you ever try to "forbid" your wife to do something, or "make her" do anything, then just go file for divorce now. She's an independent person, free to do as she wishes. If you don't like it, get a divorce, but never, ever, try to control her.

Seriously, grow up, you do NOT own her.

Ok, now for the cliffnoted backstory. This will may change peoples answers. The "old friend who happens to be a guy" is me.

Theres a girl who used to like me. We were really close friend but I turned her down (a whole nother thread why I did this). As a result she got with this guy and they ended up getting married. Fastforward, 2(?) years. I go out to vegas, we (including him) meet up at a club, shes flirty with me, feeling me up and letting me do the same, he sees it (i think? how could he not, we danced most the night), doesnt really do anything but gets really passive agressive. I dont think i stepped out of line, we were both super drunk but i never made any moves.

Fast foward to now, shes coming out to California at the end of the month so i say lets get some sushi, she says more or less hed have to be there. hes only going to be out for like 2-3 days so now i have to change my schedule around to when hell be here. i think its retarded because although hes a nice guy, hes not really my friend.

Hearing the story, what do people think? I really just wanna hang out and catch up. I think its silly...

Technically I dont know that he saw it, and I also dont know if he knows she used to like me and wanted to be with me. So while I can put 2 and 2 together, I dont officially know if he knows all of this.

I'm not so much suprised, just annoyed. Because I know that shes an independent person by nature and its not like her to "ask" to do things. She usually wears the pants.

[Tonko]

Yeah, started to post that reply like 4 hours ago, didn't read all the posts. Apologies :-p

[Jefe]

Put yourself in his position. If you care for this person (or not, has to deal with morals and ethics), it is clear that if you proceed with your rendezvous you will trigger a conflict between them. Think with your brain, not your head. Wow, that was easy lol, next!

Doc Love, providing extramarital advice since Sep. 2007.

PS: If I were the dude, and had noticed your flirtatious behaviour, I'd kicked your ass real good right on the spot. Bye! \('-'0)

[skurlover]

I've been you dude, it doesn't end well.

I believe the threat of death and all sorts of violence ensued....

Too bad I've got more guns and better hiding spots.

In all seriousness, I understand your desire to hang out with her, but grinding on a man's wife IN vegas WHILE drunk puts you on the permanent shit list, whether you like it or not. Just buck it up and deal with him or put her behind you.

[Goso]

Eh, let her go out.... then the nagging voice will shut-the-fuck-up for a few hours.

ps, yes, I'm married.

Edit- Gawd dammit, finished reading the thread...
Don't fuck with a mans wife. Isn't much I get pissed about, but your putting yourself into a dangerous situation fucking around with a mans wife. There is only one thing in this world I would protect with my life, and thats it.

[skurlover]

Eh, let her go out.... then the nagging voice will shut-the-fuck-up for a few hours.

ps, yes, I'm married.

^ This guy skims.

[Amarok]

If you didn't want to have to change your schedule to hang out with her you shouldn't have been feeling up another man's wife. Doesn't matter if you were both drunk or if she touched you first. You should have told her no and this wouldn't be an issue.

[Goso]

Eh, let her go out.... then the nagging voice will shut-the-fuck-up for a few hours.

ps, yes, I'm married.

^ This guy skims.

lololol, I laughed good at this one... was typing my edit while you posted this... kekeke

[Intense]

Put yourself in his position. If you care for this person (or not, has to deal with morals and ethics), it is clear that if you proceed with your rendezvous you will trigger a conflict between them. Think with your brain, not your head. Wow, that was easy lol, next!

It definately isnt that easy. Im not thinking with my "head," reread my posts..

PS: If I were the dude, and had noticed your flirtatious behaviour, I'd kicked your ass real good right on the spot. Bye! \('-'0)

That brings up another question, why would you get pissed at me? I'm not the one married to you and thus I have no commitment to you to not mess around with other people. She is the one who has a responsibility to you, get mad at her.[

[Eaglestrike]

It's a respect thing. Ever heard of "treat others as you want to be treated"? I don't want someone to fuck with my wife, so I'm not going to fuck around with someone elses. I don't care if she "wants to" or not, the big decision was made, she's not with you, leave her be.

[Shuemue]

Wow, now that I know the rest...

I sure as fuck wouldn't be happy about her seeing you if I'm not around. Feeling up my wife? Fuck that shit, violence ensues.

[XxSlusherxx]

tell him your gay 8)

[Remyo]

Fuck that shit, death ensues.

[Iono]

You got balls for feeling up another mans wife. Even more for doing it while he's in the same building. . .

Then again balls are often confused with stupidity.

[Therin]

Go find some poon elsewhere, this one is too risky.

[Intense]

Yeah yeah yeah... maybe he does have reason to not want me and her alone. I agreed to schedule it during him being around.

I still maintain its more her he should be pissed at!! Shes the one who truly disrespected him, I was just the innocent piece of meat . To add another thing, the day after she calls me hungover to schedule another get together for that night and were talking about random shit and she goes into a complaining rant about him. Who knows... Women.

[Sho]

Wow, now that I know the rest...

I sure as fuck wouldn't be happy about her seeing you if I'm not around. Feeling up my wife? Fuck that shit, violence ensues.

Amen. If I was married. But Amen.

[Charla]

tell him your gay 8)

Whaddaya know, a perfect solution!

[Popeh]

To be blunt, after reading that you are the friend, my immediate suspision intentional or not is that you're interested.

If you we're simply on friend basis and wasn't thinking about making a pass, or wanted to see her for other motives you would of never even thought about making a moral thread about it.

again, imo.