Weirdest shit you done as a child

[Misterjingles]

So I recently watched "Superbad" (yeah I know shaddup D and you know when that guy said that his obession as a child was just drawing penises? That got me randomly thinking, what was some weird ass shit that I've done as a child?

When I was starting preschool we were all in like a circle to sing or some shit that kids do and I recall me taking this girls shoe that I had a crush on and then proceeded to hump the floor. Now after the song and all the girl took her shoe back and all was well... until I get to my uncles house (they were a few years older than I) and they go and are like "Hey want to see porn?"

Not knowing what porn was at the time I was intrigued at it (the magizine was called "The Leg Show") and the undeniable urge to hump something came back, so I went to my tita's (aunts) room and grabbed a pair of socks and just started humping the shit out of it while reading this porno mag. With this event my urge for humping the shit out of socks on the floor grew, I just HAD to hump a sock on the floor, whether it is during Ducktails or Darkwing Duck or Jame Bond Jr, whatever, I was there, sock on floor, going at it like a rabbit, grinding my crotch on this sock like how the ladies do it at clubs. I eventually had a huge stockpile of socks that I would use whenever I had the urge to... hump a sock.

This behavior happened for a good couple of years, from about 5-7 years old until the almighty power of the blackbox and the discovery of Playboy and the Spice channels, channels 68 and 69 respectively, by then it was just hump the floor action until I learned in 5th grade that you can play with your dick with your hands... or have someone else do it OR even put it in something! But option one was more easily available.

So /bg/ this is the history (or what I can mostly recall) of how Misterjingles came to be, what weird shit have you done as a child? :3

[riddaraan]

I remember I tied up a stuffed clown doll and physically abused it, even though my only exposure to violence had been a movie where wolves chased a guy in the snow. I was 5 then. That was only once that I can recall.

Other shit I did? Hm... I cut the ears off of all my stuffed animals & put them in labelled bags. Just in case they got lost in our shipment overseas, so they could be identified. Like DNA testing. Except, this was 1985, and I don't think they really had DNA testing then.

[Vandole]

when i was 4 i thought i was a daredevil, so i did stupid shit around he house constantly, today it would probably be considered jackass stuff, but.. i nearly broke my neck doing some stuff once and i still suffer from it today... my neck gets stiff and pops really bad sometimes..

[Akiyama]

When I lived in Montgomery, in a big apartment complex, I used to ride around on my tricycle naked when I was ~2ish.

[Fhqwghads]

I think pretty much everyone did weird shit as a kid. I sure as hell am not posting about it here lol.

Sock humping?

[Misterjingles]

When I lived in Montgomery, in a big apartment complex, I used to ride around on my tricycle naked when I was ~2ish.

Oh shit this reminded me of how whenever I was on a swing as a child, I pulled out my dick and played it like a guitar while singing "LA LA LA BUMBA".

Good times.

::edit::

@Fhqwghads: The earlier the better from what I heard... also, your shit can't be as bad as mine. HAHAHAHA!?

[Ramor]

When I was 8 I jumped off of a 3 story building (into some snow) just to see how it felt, it hurts a bit btw.

Although I think anything after the sock-humping is going to be easily trumped, well done

[Falisa]

I used to carry conversations with my friends when I was 5 talking like a cat. "meow! meow meow meow" "mrow mrow meow mrow"

[Ramor]

I used to carry conversations with my friends when I was 5 talking like a cat. "meow! meow meow meow" "mrow mrow meow mrow"

this made me think of supertroopers

[Misterjingles]

The fuck is wrong with you people? Actually... what the fuck is wrong with me :3

So I just remembered some other shit that I've done as a child, I recall whenever I heard someone curse, I would run off and say it repeatedly along with the other words that I heard, so I wouldn't forget it, eventually my phrases went something like "shitfuckcuntdickasspussyniggergookfaggotbitch " at like the age of 5. I was unstoppable, until a little bastard ratted me out sharing my verbal rapage of other childrens ears, soap does NOT cleans one mouth however, but it sure did piss me off. XD

[Zetah]

I pissed in a water fountain in London.

[Tricen]

When I was around 6 or 7 I got the SNES or whatever and played Mortal Combat and Killer Instinct all the time, so... Mainly just acting out Mortal Kombat and Killer Instinct <_<? Pooped my pants at school and didn't tell anyone. Walking around in shitty underwear is very uncomfortable. I was also very paranoid people where able to see what I was doing wrong, or something to that effect. Like when I shit my pants, I sat on the back of my legs cause I thought they had a scanner in the floor. Idk I was weird like that <_>

[Ikith]

Once when I was 6 me and a few kids I knew got naked and had a mud fight then I ran all the way home (5 min walk) naked and took a shower while my parents proceeded to ask WTF LOL!

[Misterjingles]

Once when I was 6 me and a few kids I knew got naked and had a mud fight then I ran all the way home (5 min walk) naked and took a shower while my parents proceeded to ask WTF LOL!

Oh fuck yeah I remember when me and my friend got naked and had a pillow fight, during the melee his dad walked in and was like "WTF you bakla (gay), put your buto (penises) away". It's ok though, our balls never touched, so it was never gay.

::edit::

Only borderline, like just touching the line to it being gay.

[Nirokun!]

i took my little brother's little mermaid and (whatever that prince guy's name was, the guy wit hthe black hair that she liked) and taking their clothes off

i always spent more time looking at the INCREDIBLY sexual area that was his naked groin. it was like a "U" shape and i found that very, very appealing

also, i was ninjaman. we got that on tape

[trinironnie]

Tasted mah own shit when i was around 4 >.> and when i was around 7 me and my other cousins took a shower in the rain. My family says when my sister ate her crayon set she shat different colors is that possible

[Metah]

I fell asleep on the toilet once when I was 4 :\

[Mizango]

I was once dared by my brother to jump my brand new bike off of the top of a "barn like" storage shed we had in our back yard. I did it and bent both of my bike rims and snapped my ankle and leg in half.

He laughed and ran in the house.

Second stupid thing I did was virtually reenact the entire movie of Rambo: First blood. My brother and I took the quote "He's been been trained to ignore pain, ignore weather, to live off the land, to eat things that would make a billy goat puke" too literally. We spent the entire summer of '80 something making stick weapons, commando style training and eating raw bacon, sausage, livermush, jars of Cake icing, fish food, bees etc.. to our parents chagrin.

A few weeks later after our Rambo diet we had to take medication for tape and round worms we found writhing in our shit over the span of a few weeks.

You sure you really want this thread? I could literally go on and on and on for days. My stupidity knew no bounds at that time lol.

[Lexa]

I was convinced I was Zorro, and wore a cape and mask to school all through the first six months of first grade.

Come to think of it, that might explain the hazing.

[Ramor]

Tasted mah own shit when i was around 4 >.> and when i was around 7 me and my other cousins took a shower in the rain. My family says when my sister ate her crayon set she shat different colors is that possible

from what i'm told i used to do the same thing back in second grade, people would apparently pay me money and i'd have eaten just about anything (about 2~3 dollars in change a few crayon boxes and a lot of different bugs)