So I think I got the clap.

[sirdude]

OP, the thing that bothers me the most about your situation is that she continued to lie even after you had physical symptoms. What kind of person do you think she is if she was so self-centered that she wouldn't even tell you the truth while your balls are on the line? Seriously, you know what the problem is here? You are a much better person than she is and she is so fucking selfish that she cant admit to herself or anyone else that she is a terrible fucking person. She doesn't care about you man. People that care about each other don't lie and let their spouse suffer from a communicable disease because they are too fucking scared to take responsibility for their actions. Would you ever cheat on her? Would you let her cunt fucking rot to pieces while you kept your mouth shut? If the answers are no, then you need to go find a woman that is going to treat you the way you want to be treated. There is no excuse for that shit. Think about it this way, what if she gave you AIDS man? And just kept that to herself for idk..... 20 years till you looked like tom hanks in philadelphia. fuck that bitch, move on.

[Ivve]

Sirdude has a really good point. Does she have any symptoms? Did she know about your symptoms? She never said shit to you until you were fucking diagnosed? Also, what kind of whore did you marry that cheated on you and didn't even have the decency to use a condom? She really could have given you something much, much worse than chlamydia. What if it had been genital warts, herpes, HIV? She really put her life and yours at risk without a second thought. Edit: fuck man, what if she had gotten pregnant from this encounter? She might have seriously stuck you with a baby rather than admit she fucked someone else. Get out before she does something to you that isn't reversible.

[sirdude]

Yea exactly. You said she actually had the fucking audacity to joke with you about an "STD" that she fucking gave you?????? Omg that bitch would feel the wrath. Yes, maybe it is a curable disease but only if its treated. I mean shit man, that could be permanent damage if you went all summer thinking it was a heat rash. Fucking sadistic bitch.

[Artful Dodger]

did the urinalysis come back yet?

[Day]

did the urinalysis come back yet?

For him? I don't think Chlamydia gets tested through urine. They stick this fucking cotton swab down your pee hole, and it hurts as much as you think it would.

[Maguspk]

That's not rape, that's a lack of willpower.

Actually, freezing is one of the most common responses a woman can have when she is being raped, it's described as a full body paralysis by the victims. The common response a man will make is what you've said, but women handle things alot differently than men might and honestly, it's a little blase to be like "She should have just fought him off."

I'm not saying she was raped, but if she was the situation should be handled a lot differently, it really does make a difference. The responses people have like "She didn't mention it" and such are really out the window if she was raped.

[Mizango]

Everyone claiming that it was a "one time" thing keep this in mind, she did not confess until he got burned. What if he had never gotten burned? Would she have said anything? Probably not seeing as how EVEN with symptoms she was still denying it and ridiculing him. Who's to say this is a one time lapse in judgment? The more appropriate term would be this is the one time there was physical proof to let questions creep in.

I'm sure Socks has ran this scenario through his head also. You can always ask "what if". What if it happened before? Obviously she was comfortable enough to console him alone and to let him vigorously pound her snatch. This is strictly speculation! But I am just saying that you can't say its a "one time" thing just because she said so. Even when presented with irrefutable evidence she looked him in the face and lied and even joked about it.

I agree with everyone else, it takes 2 to tango. He should not be spared a beat down or castration at your hands. Speaking of which...wasn't there a story of some chick tearing a guys nut sack off at a party with her bare hands? Derail like a motherfucker I know but it fits the vindictive justice I would be seeking.

[Kaddisfly]

This story needs it's own thread!

On topic...sometimes I feel that women will pull the rape card out when they regret having sex with someone that they had actually given consent to. I've known a girl who had had sex with a guy and bragged about it...then a few months later when they broke up, she told everyone that he "OMG RAPED ME WHAT A HORRIBLE PERSON".

I realize this is not always the case, but in this situation it sounds like that's the case.

I stopped reading this thread at this point here.

I wanted to take a moment to back up Izzy's statement here. I had a girlfriend about 4 years ago who claimed she was raped (she told me this after she came up to visit me and screwed me..) by a friend at a party.

She wouldn't give me a name, an address or anything. I told her we needed to press charges, she wouldn't do it. Her excuse? "My mom bought us the alcohol I can't get her in trouble! (she was 18 at the time). So, I confronted her mom about it and she too told her to press charges, she still said no.

At this point a man can do one of two things: break up with her or hunt the alleged rapist down. So I hunted him down. Using the help of some of her friends I narrowed down who it was. Confronted him and his father at their crappy little shack of a house and pretty much told him to step outside and take it like a man.

He looks at me shocked and goes "Wait, your her boyfriend? ...She told me she wasn't dating anyone..." Ahh! The plot thickens!

He calls her and she answers and says "I'm with your boyfriend right now, why is he saying I raped you?" She hangs up.

I still punched the guy because it made me feel better.

To Sock:

Life isn't always fair man, and nice guys tend to finish last. But keep on truckin, only advice I can give to you. Someone who has been there and gone through that bullshit, nothing anyone says will make you feel better. Time itself will eventually heal the mental wounds. Keep yourself busy and occupied with other things and get the balls to venture into the world alone. There are plenty of great woman out there.

[Day]

I still punched the guy because it made me feel better.

Awesome.

[sock]

Fuck this. As I skim, I keep seeing more and more ridiculous shit. First she didn't fuck anyone. Then she did, but it only happened once, and she was lured into it. Then she wasn't really lured, but it was rape. Then it happened more than once. My advice to you is to unload her. You are never going to be able to rebuild the trust in that relationship, for one. You also have to ask yourself whether or not you would ever want to rebuild a relationship with someone who would lie about rape. You are married someone who is willing to completely trash someone else's entire life to cover up a lapse in judgment. Fuck that; you do not need that sort of shit in your life.

That was never said, if you are going to skim and then post, skim the important stuff.


As far as everything else, she is saying rape, she did file charges. Now as far as getting him, well with the charges filed I will be the first door they knock on. I can't risk going to jail and missing a test or my registration that's next week. To get friend to do it, I would have to tell that friend why, and I don't want every person I know to know everything that's happening right now.

I am not saying I believe her or that I know what I am going to do.
As I said she has gone away for a few weeks and things are just going to go from there.

[Neosutra]

Id start with moving your money from a joint account.

Seriously.

Also remove her from credit cards and move her name off important bills/paperwork.

Shes going to quickly move into the offensive here when she figures out your not buying the rape story (which you shouldnt).

And dont think infidelity will guarentee you a good divorce, as it only fucks men over, not women. Since you got her to press charges, the judge is just going to see you as some asshole who is ditching this "poor helpless woman" in her time of need, when in actuality she is a lying cheater who played the rape card after multiple instances of infedility and lying to her husband.

I know you dont want to, but you need to start looking at this from a legal standpoint.

[sock]

Id start with moving your money from a joint account.

Seriously.

Also remove her from credit cards and move her name off important bills/paperwork.

Way ahead of you, about 5years. We don't even have a bank account, all the bills are in my name. There is nothing we hold jointly.

[Xajii]

I still punched the guy because it made me feel better.

you are a hero

[Lockecole7]

you are an hero

Fixed.

[Ollieyk]

If she's pressing charges against him for rape, then she's either lying and regrets a huge amount, or she is telling the truth in which case you need to be a bit more understanding.

As for him, if he gets arrested he's gonna get more than the clap in jail. If he gets away with it, do what has previously been suggested. (Shitting on his cat etc...)

[archibaldcrane]

This sounds like an exceptionally difficult rape charge to make stick - no physical evidence, she has a huge motivation to claim rape if it was consensual, etc. etc.

[Ivve]

That was never said, if you are going to skim and then post, skim the important stuff.

Sorry, with people comparing their own experiences to what happened to you, it can become kind of confusing. Even after going back and reading completely through the thread, that's somehow the impression I came out with.

Regardless, did she experience symptoms of her own before you? It seems to me that if she knew before you were exhibiting symptoms that she was carrying an STD from the encounter, she still did you wrong by not saying anything. Hell, even the first second that she got out of the situation, got home, and had time for the reality of the situation to sink in, she should have thought of you too. She could have contracted any STD from this encounter, some of which we all know are potentially serious, that can have lasting effects ranging from rendering you unable to reproduce to death. Would you be as forgiving or understanding if we were sitting here talking about how you got HIV from this? For all you know, that could still be the discussion you're having with her in 6 months or a year. Surely that occurred to her at some point, but it still wasn't enough to motivate her to either tell you or stop having unprotected sex with you.

I don't know about you, but there's a point where I feel like protecting yourself takes a backseat to protecting the people you love. When your own feelings of discomfort, embarrassment, or guilt preclude you from taking any precautions at all to prevent potentially serious harm to others... There's a point where it crosses over into just being fucking selfish.

[KuaiEQ]

have sex with the dude to get back at her.

[Siniroth]

a relationship will not recover from it, period, unless it's brought up right when it happens and the one who cheated begs for forgiveness, AND doesn't EVER even get close to that line again.

wtf stop reading my mind. that's my exact stance on cheating and whether it's forgiven or not <_< an additional requirement is that I never could have found out otherwise

[Groovebox]

You could have known this was going to happen just by looking at your wedding photo:

http://i51.photobucket.com/albums/f3...x9/file000.jpg