Porn industry seeks federal bailout

[0ni0n]

WASHINGTON (CNN) — Another major American industry is asking for assistance as the global financial crisis continues: Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said Wednesday they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry.

“The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three,” said Owen Moogan, spokesman for Larry Flynt. “The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine.”

Francis said in a statement that “the US government should actively support the adult industry's survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people."
“We should be delivering [the request] by the end of today to our congressmen and [Secretary of the Treasury Henry] Paulson asking for this $5 billion dollar bailout,” he told CNN Wednesday.

Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow.

But the industry leaders said the issue is a nation in need. "People are too depressed to be sexually active," Flynt said in the statement. "This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex."
"With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It's time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly."

So far, there has been no congressional reaction to the request.
–CNN’s Chloe Melas contributed to this report

Seriously?

[Headspace]

Girls Gone Wild is porn?

[Jefe]

What's the main criterion to grant a bail out, some random shit or the socioeconomic impact it may have?

[archibaldcrane]

Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger

Fail.

[Serif]

Girls Gone Wild is porn?

^

And lol, I can't wait to see my Dad's reaction about this if it comes up on Fox News/CNN

[MrW]

Lol... I love this country. I'm going to start my own business, run it terribly and then ask for a ridiculous amount of money. I'm going to mass produce pet rocks. Who's with me!?

[Tristam]

^

And lol, I can't wait to see my Dad's reaction about this if it comes up on Fox News/CNN

I guarantee you Bill O'Angry busted a nut when he heard about this, bitching about this sounds like a highlight-reel issue for him.

[0ni0n]

Lol... I love this country. I'm going to start my own business, run it terribly and then ask for a ridiculous amount of money. I'm going to mass produce pet rocks. Who's with me!?

I chuckled more than I should reading this. pet rocks.

[Resin]

I chuckled more than I should reading this. pet rocks.

lolz...yeah, like that would ever work....

[Dimmauk]

I'm still waiting for the Oil companies to ask for their bail-out.

[Stiker]

Girls Gone Wild is porn?

Sup Congress? Yeah I need a few billion. My investment in T-Shirts, handheld cameras, and booze to get girls to take their clothes off has been seriously hurt by the economic downturn.

[Kuya]

Hard to take seriously.

[Dimmauk]

Bailout = taking it in the ass, and the porn industry usually gets paid for it. So I can understand them wanting money.

[Lavik]

better to give it to pr0n > crooks on wall street
obviously

[Sixtail]

Horny couples with good webcams and basic movie making software are more of a threat to teh porn juggernut then anything, save maybe for the countless websites with cracked porn website codes.

[Conrad]

Where's the original link? I wanted to show this to my roommate.

[Athas]

Last time I check the intrawebs, the porn industry was doing very well for itself.

Oh my yes...

[0ni0n]

Where's the original link? I wanted to show this to my roommate.

Here you go. http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com...deral-bailout/

[Jer]

The number of concerned people who were leaving comments on the news site had me laughing.

YES THIS IS A COMPLETELY SERIOUS ATTEMPT AND HAS EVERY CHANCE AT PASSING.

Even the spokesman who was quoted nearly right-out said it was a satirical move.

[Byrd]

The porn industry was never shy about free publicity, which is exactly what this is.

But I think this serves as a valuable reminder to us all that watching porn is patriotic.

Girls Gone Wild is porn?

Their DVDs are quite definitely X-rated. They're about an hour long, and half of that is girls flashing the camera in clubs, but there's about 2 or 3 explicit girl-girl or masturbation scenes in every DVD.

...or so I've heard from this guy my brother's friend knows who watches such filth.