I'll just fix your merits with explanation. I am taking into account that you mainly play WHM and BRD, as you mentioned. So here goes..........
HP/MP: 2 into HP 1 into MP (Planning on either finishing off HP or 4/4)
Recommendation: go 8/8 HP!!! or 6 HP 2 MP if you lazy........since your a taru, MP should not be a matter at all. get your HP up for survivability, better converts, devotion etc etc etc
Attributes: I was thinking of doing 3 CHR, and 2 DEX or AGI.
Recommendation: CHR is a waste of merits, and your time to even grind that merit, to put them into utter waste. If you intent, or have a melee job(BST since i think i saw you mentioning that), go for 5 STR. no dont go for mix, 5 STR onry. if you dont like your BST, you can still go 5 INT to help your BLM, or even rdm. nope, no dex no mnd, 5 str or 5 int onry period.
Combat skills: 6/8 Dagger plan to cap. and have capped Evasion skill.
Thinking of doing axe for Beastmaster not sure. or marksmanship for Thief.
Recommendation: Evasion is not popular these days, you may wanna remove it. you dont have a thf job so i was wondering why you wanna cap dagger skill. but hey at least its dagger not club/staff. so i guess 8/8 dagger is ok.... go for 8/8 axe is fine, since one day you may wanna play WAR too.....as for the other 4, maybe you can go 4 sword. But for my recommendation and doing it right, go 8 axe, 8 sword, 4 dagger.
Magic: 1 enfeebling, 1 sing, 1 wind. going to cap out wind and singing.
Recommendation: If you really like BRD that much, go 8 wind 8 singing is fine. but if you know your songs are not going to get resisted that much or you dont have the enough gears to reach next "song tier" then going 8 and 8 is useless/not needed. can always go 8 enfeebling or 8 elemental. but if your a really good brd, 8 singing 8 wind is fine.
Other: Capped critical hit, and almost capped enemy critical hit rate.
Recommendation: N/A. You got one right there!
Whitemage merits:
Group 1 merits:
4 Cure cast
2 Barspell
4 Regen
Recommendation: -_- regen. go 5 curing speed and 5 bar. at least just a little merits to tweak group 1.
Group 2
Devotion 1 plan to cap
Pro 5 1
Shell V 1 Plan to cap
Recommendation: Can keep that prot V lvl 1 if you like. 4 devo, 1 prot V, 5 shell V is ok.
Red Mage: I just got it 75 so it doesn't have anything yet but plan to do
Group 1
Ice, wind and earth accuracy
Group 2
I plan either Dia 3 or Bio 3
and to cap Slow 2 and Paralyze 2
Recommendation: Any RDM should have 5 convert, or 3 minimum. as for elements, it all scale down to what you do really. if you like full MND slow, you can go 5 earth. This can be further enhanced in group 2 to ensure full MND slow dont get resisted. Ice and Wind can also be mixed. Actually, like i said, it scale down to what you do really. Can mix too np. but general idea is convert should be 3-5.
For group 2, if your doing full MND slow and have 5 earth in group 1, you can go 5 slow 2. Slow 2 imo just needed lvl 1. and if your doing it right, you need 4-5. dont mid as well, i eedn people with 2 each in group 2 and, tbh, it blows in all aspect of all the 5 spells...... You may wanna throw in phalanx 2. Phalanx 2 is good only you get lvl 4 or 5. 1 2 3 sucks..... lolpara2 you dont need that. its too random. Bio 3 is good for solo, and its a lvl 4 or 5 thing. lvl 1 2 3 sucks. So yea, it goes down to what you do. What i did was 5 bio 4 phalanx 1 slow cos i solo/low man with my rdm. My wife is my personal support rdm. so shes 5 slow 5 phalanx. It goes down to what you do. RDM is very versatile.
Bard merits:
Group 1:
Lullaby capped
Finale almost capped
Group 2:
Nightingale 1
Troubadour 1 Plan to cap both
Recommendation: N/A. Good job but spend your merits on other jobs first. 1 trou 1 nigh is ok for now.
Summoner merits:
Avatar physical accuracy 1 from being capped
Avatar physical attack 1 from being capped (plan to cap both)
Recommendation:Im not a super duper smn but from what i know from the trend now is that 5 lvl attack is not that super useful. it only means extra "few" random damage from predator claws etc. 5 lvl of accurancy is ok. but i feel that you should spend the other 5 on magic accurancy, because there are some NMs in this game that needed nukes from group 2(if for some reason your not using BLM for nuking these kinda NMs -_-)
Summary
Yes, your initial merit choices are pretty bad........and i suppose thats why your friend mean that you have gimp merits, because, tbh, it kinda blow my mind how you got some of those "plan" in your head. but hey, since you posted here, we gotta help right? but end of the day, if you dont wanna do it, and wanna follow your "plan", go ahead
