Pastor deflects four rounds with a bible before being gunned down

[Snprphnx]

Blame the Roman Catholics.

Tearin' shit out.

Actually Jay, the Roman Catholic bible is longer than the NIV, KJV, etc that Protestant denominations use, due to the apocrypha being included. Now whos tearin' shit out.

[Araelus]

Actually Jay, the Roman Catholic bible is longer than the NIV, KJV, etc that Protestant denominations use, due to the apocrypha being included. Now whos tearin' shit out.

Jay's comment was ironic because the OP is about a Baptist. But thanks for pointing this out.

[tenriotaru]

I was envisioning:

As a preacher gives his weekly sermon, he takes note of an unfamiliar man standing up in the back. Curious, his eyes follow the man as he starts walking up the aisle when suddenly, the man pulls a gun from his jacket and takes aim at the preacher.

Startled, the preacher swings his bible out just in time to deflect the bullet and says, "Is that all you got, punk?"

The man, still walking at a steady pace, takes aim and shoots again.

Furious, the preacher swiftly moves the bible to intercept, and once again addresses the man.
"Come on, drop the gun and let's settle this like men!"

Perturbed, the man keeps walking and responds, "Why won't you die, preacher man?!"
Once again, he takes a shot and then another, which the preacher deflects one after the other.

Fuming, the preacher replies, "I am a man of God. He has seen fit to save me," as the man finally reaches him.

"Yeah, well..." the man begins, as he places the barrel of his gun against the preacher's forehead.

"Let's see your god save you from this."

One final shot echoes through the church halls. Blood sprays the congregants seated just feet away in the front row of pews, as the realization slowly dawns on them that this is not confetti.

Holy crap, I just imagined this and saw it as if it were an episode of Black Lagoon or something.

[Shinryuu]

I was envisioning:

As a preacher gives his weekly sermon, he takes note of an unfamiliar man standing up in the back. Curious, his eyes follow the man as he starts walking up the aisle when suddenly, the man pulls a gun from his jacket and takes aim at the preacher.

Startled, the preacher swings his bible out just in time to deflect the bullet and says, "Is that all you got, punk?"

The man, still walking at a steady pace, takes aim and shoots again.

Furious, the preacher swiftly moves the bible to intercept, and once again addresses the man.
"Come on, drop the gun and let's settle this like men!"

Perturbed, the man keeps walking and responds, "Why won't you die, preacher man?!"
Once again, he takes a shot and then another, which the preacher deflects one after the other.

Fuming, the preacher replies, "I am a man of God. He has seen fit to save me," as the man finally reaches him.

"Yeah, well..." the man begins, as he places the barrel of his gun against the preacher's forehead.

"Let's see your god save you from this."

One final shot echoes through the church halls. Blood sprays the congregants seated just feet away in the front row of pews, as the realization slowly dawns on them that this is not confetti.

You's my hero