Morning Wood: Is my friend just being a whiner?

[Purrrfect]

having the power of the penis has too many other advantages to get all weepy over the minor kinks.

lol well played!

[Max™]

Just lean forwards, put your hands on the wall over the toilet to brace yourself, and bend your dick down appropriately.

It generally gives up the fight after a few seconds of pissing, so unless you have some weird piss fetish that makes it harder, you should be fine.

Mine generally stands up like a proud hardon should, just have to figure it out... or go out in the back yard and try to arc a shot into the neighbors yard from the porch.



...just make sure you check which way the wind is blowing first.

[aalryn]

Step 1: wait a minute and think about something else.
Step 3: profit
Step 2: .....

That's how easy it is. Step 3 comes before step 2!

[Lbelle]

Boys are sooooooo weird.

[Yuri-G]

in my experience there are two kinds of morning wood.

- regular morning wood. let it go down and pee. or pee in the shower. or bend your dick a little bit downwards and make the angle work.

- alcohol morning wood (i.e. you got wasted last night). imo the best way to deal with this is to just jack off and then piss (for some reason I'm always horny as shit the morning after I get drunk, even if I got laid). this may be hard (no pun intended) if you have a hangover; in that case, try and pass back out until the hangover passes. if you can't, use the same procedure as for normal morning wood. or better yet, smoke some weed - best hangover cure on the planet, bar none.

[zoobernut]

I still think the OP's friend is just using this as an excuse to talk about how big his dick is to a girl. Pretty sound advice from everyone there are all sorts of ways to tackle this problem.

The OP's friend is just being whiny.

[Seanr]

The worst is when you go to pee and the stream splits and/or you lose control. That's way worse than morning wood. I don't mind when it happens in a urinal but when it happens at home, it sucks.

Fucking this.

[Max™]

Oh god... when you get done fucking and pass out, wake up at 3 am to piss, one stream lands right in the toilet, the other stream hits the toilet paper dispenser.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!

[zoobernut]

Now that is something for a discussion. I personally cannot stand staying in bed too long after sex. No matter what I feel a very strong urge to take a shower after to clean up. We always get up to take a shower even if it is late and we are tired. Even if to just rinse off quickly.

Who takes a shower after sex every time and who doesn't care and just rolls over and falls asleep?

[Day]

Now that is something for a discussion. I personally cannot stand staying in bed too long after sex. No matter what I feel a very strong urge to take a shower after to clean up. We always get up to take a shower even if it is late and we are tired. Even if to just rinse off quickly.

Who takes a shower after sex every time and who doesn't care and just rolls over and falls asleep?

I don't shower exactly but I can't fucking lay there, and I have to clean up like immediately. Thank god my gf isn't overly obsessed with immediate after sex cuddle cause that shit aint happenin. I gotta wash off satan's spawn asap.

[Xajii]

I can't jerk off when I have to piss bad, anyone else?

[Devia]

Your women don't bring a warm washcloth right away and clean you off?

[Xajii]

Your women don't bring a warm washcloth right away and clean you off?

uses her mouth

[Brill Weave]

Not to toot my own horn. But I'm fairly well endowed(my wife took pictures of it and sent it to her friends when we first started dating) and I have never, ever once had this issue. Granted in the morning I piss in the shower, but even still your friend is an idiot.

[Mizango]

Your women don't bring a warm washcloth right away and clean you off?

Wipe me down ♫

Shoulders, chest, pants, shoes....

[Brill Weave]

Shoulders, chest, pants, Timberlands....

Fixed for you.

[Day]

naw man, lugz, this dude white as hell

[Demosthenes]

aim is off when Johnson's on alert. I sit and push it downwards a tad.

[edit] what niro said already.

[Selamis]

I'm a fan of using the put your hand on the wall above the toilet and bend over practice to piss with a boner.

[aalryn]

Your women don't bring a warm washcloth right away and clean you off?

mine does

... seriously