Mistress

[Celeste]

If you can't give me a sure-fire way to kill myself, shut the fuck up.

[Celeste]

I could hang myself!

[Celeste]

No, that's too cliche.

[Ohaigaiz]

starving yourself is a surefire way to kill yourself lol

god you're an idiot

[Ohaigaiz]

oh sorry i didn't mean to be so vague. i meant starve yourself until you pass out and die, not starve yourself like the anorexic douchebag you already are

[Celeste]

See, it isn't, as my family would notice very easily when I become malnourished, and from there, it's just a trip to the hospital. God, you're an idiot. Unlike you, I do go out of my bedroom frequently.

[Celeste]

In fact, I'm on my patio right now.

[Celeste]

Ohaigaiz, I understand you have aspergers, but if you're incapable of putting any serious thought into suggesting ways to kill myself, it would be best were you to go away.

Because, you know, although I'm being focused on right now, nobody likes you any better than they do me, and you've been here much, much longer.

[Celeste]

It's merely a suggestion intended to help you.

[Celeste]

Because, I do feel bad for you. Very bad.

[Ohaigaiz]

get in a car and drive it as fast as you can down the interstate or highway directed at some trees or at cars coming towards you
jump off a roof onto your face
fill up the bathtub sit in it plug in a toaster/hairdryer turn it on and drop it in
swallow all the pills you have(although this will probably just make you very sick, which i approve of even if it won't kill you your stomach will need to be pumped)
cut your wrists in this direction | right where your vein is
put hot glue/super glue into your nostrils so they're plugged and shove cotton balls in your throat or super glue your lips together
make an incision in your stomach, not deep, but enough to cut through all the fat you have in your huge gut, pull out your intestines
drink bleach
fill your bathtub with hot water lay down on your back and take a lot of deep breathes
eat a few large tubes of tooth paste
drink a few bottles of cough syrup
drink paint
put a plastic bag over your head tie it around your neck really tight and wait
go to a highway or interstate and run in front of a car(this is definitelythe coolest way)
poor gasoline all over yourself and light yourself on fire

alright, i gave you a ton of things my mind could think of. now you've got to quit whining so much you emo faggot and chose a method. personally i'd go with setting yourself on fire as your skin and flesh will burn off long before you actually die so it is the worst way to die and my god do you deserve it

[Celeste]

I suppose I do deserve it, Ohaigaiz.

[gamez]

This is precisely why I took my MSN/AIM out of my profile on here >__>; it's like Screening since people have to PM for that info.

[Jerseyprophet]

There a picture of mistress laying around? Curiousity.

[gamez]

Really..? REALLY?

That's kind of like "Wow, you have really low self-esteem...can I poop on your chest?"
"Your life sucks...what're you doing Friday?"

[Jerseyprophet]

Nah nigga, I know what everyone else looks like and I cant even tell if its a girl or a guy or what not.

[Dezzimal]

yes

[Jerseyprophet]

Black Ravens fly overhead
the dark lord hates me
death is my tears
wanna fuck?

[gamez]

yes

>:/ that wasn't an open invitation Dez, it was like a rhetorical mock-question, sorry .

No peeing in butts either.

[Jerseyprophet]

I lol'd at the "really, REALLY?" - pictured the stan's voice from south park with the head to the side.